Jimmy Carter as President is like Truman Capote marrying Dolly Parton. The job is just too big for him. -- Rich Little Children should be like waffles--you should be able to throw the first one away.
-- Mary Alice Messenger Don't be so humble - you are not that great.
- Golda Meir (1898-1978) to a visiting diplomat What is the answer? In that case, what is the question?
-- Gertrude Stein, dying words We can never be sure that the opinion we are endeavoring to stifle is a false opinion; and if we
were sure, stifling it would be an evil still.
-- John Stuart Mill Austria If you never want to see a man again, say, "I love you, I want to marry you, I want to have children..." - they leave skid marks. -- Rita Rudner Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the
really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.
-- Mark Twain Integrity without knowledge is weak and useless, and knowledge without integrity is dangerous
and dreadful.
-- Samuel Johnson Austria
"The last Christian died on the cross." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Joint Checking Account: a handly little device which permits my wife to beat me to the draw. "Learn from the mistakes of others--you can never live long enough to make them all yourself." (John Luther) "Dream as if you'll live forever; live as if you'll die tomorrow." (James Dean) One cardinal rule of marriage should never be forgotten: "Give little, give seldom, and above all,
give grudgingly." Otherwise, what could have been a proper marriage could become an orgy of
sexual Austria Marriage is a romance in which the heroine dies in the first chapter.
-- Cecilia Egan The significant problems we face cannot be solved at the same level of thinking we were at when
we created them.
- Albert Einstein He who laughs last thinks slowest.
-- Seen on a bumper sticker Austria
Whether you think that you can, or that you can't, you are usually right.
-- Henry Ford People need loving the most when they deserve it the least.
-- John Harrigan The great tragedy of science, the slaying of a beautiful theory by an ugly fact.
-- Thomas Henry Huxley I am enough of an artist to draw freely upon my imagination. Imagination is more important than
knowledge. Knowledge is limited. Imagination encircles the world.
-- Albert Einstein blah "Show me a thoroughly satisfied man and I will show you a failure." (Thomas Alva Edison) Austria "Majority rule only works if you're also considering individual rights. Because you can't have five wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for supper." (Larry Flynt) I still believe in liberalism today as much as I ever did, but, oh, there was a happy time when I
believed in liberals...
-- G. K. Chesterton It's not whether you get knocked down, it's whether you get back up.
-- Vince Lombardi Austria
Jimmy Carter as President is like Truman Capote marrying Dolly Parton. The job is just too big for
him.
-- Rich Little A man who marries a woman to educate her falls a victim to the same fallacy as the woman who
marries a man to reform him.
-- Elbert Hubbard You cannot create experience. You must undergo it.
-- Albert Camus The public have an insatiable curiosity to know everything. Except what is worth knowing.
Journalism, conscious of this, and having tradesman-like habits, supplies their demands.
-- Oscar Wilde If God created us in His image we have certainly returned the compliment.
-- Voltaire Austria A problem is a chance for you to do your best.
-- Buke Ellington "Everyone is a bore to someone. That is unimportant. The thing to avoid is being a bore to oneself." (Gerald Brenan) Love is a snowmobile racing across the tundra and then suddenly it flips over, pinning you
underneath. At night, the ice weasels come.
-- Matt Groening, Love is Hell Austria
If absolute power corrupts absolutely, does absolute powerlessness make you pure?
-- Harry Shearer There's too much blood in my caffeine system.
-- Seen on a bumper sticker To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance
- Oscar Wilde The sun never sets on the British empire because Britain is in the east and the sun sets in the
west.
-- Unknown history student Good breeding consists in concealing how much we think of ourselves and how little we think of
the other person.
-- Mark Twain Austria 'm living so far beyond my income that we may almost be said to be living apart.
-- ee cummings Wind is to fire like distance is to love; it extinguishes the small and enflames the great.
-- Anonymous You can't shake hands with a clenched fist.
-- Indira Gandhi Austria
"In some ways, I never outgrew my adolescence. I wake up in the morning and think, 'Oh my God, I'm late for a math test!' But then I say, 'Wait a minute. I'm 40.'" (Daniel Clowes) When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives mean the most to us, we often find
that it is those who, instead of giving advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our
pain "Death is only a launching into the region of the strange Untried; it is but the first salutation to the possibilities of the immense Remote, the Wild, the Watery, the Unshored..." (Herman Melville, blah "Sometimes it is said that man cannot be trusted with the government of himself. Can he, then be trusted with the government of others? Or have we found angels in the form of kings to govern him? And in the end it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years.
-- Abraham Lincoln Austria Practice random acts of kindness and sensless acts of beauty.
-- Adair Lara "So little done, so much to do." (Cecil Rhodes) A university professor set an examination question in which he asked what is the difference
between ignorance and apathy. The professor had to give an A+ to a student who answered: I
don't know and Austria
The difference between pornography and erotica is lighting.
-- Gloria Leonard Good hours, excellent pay, fun place to work, paid training, mean boss. Oh well, four out of five
isn't bad.
-- Help Wanted Ad, PA newspaper, 1994 It is better to have a permanent income than to be fascinating.
- Oscar Wilde Although the course may change sometimes, rivers always reach the sea.
-- Led Zeppelin, Ten Years Gone Sure, it's going to kill a lot of people, but they may be dying of something else anyway.
-- Othal Brand, member of a Texas pesticide review board Austria You can pretend to be serious; you can't pretend to be witty.
- Sacha Guitry Nuns: Women who marry God. If they divorce Him, do they get half the universe? The promises of maniacs, like those of women, are not safely relied upon.
-- Joseph Heller, God Knows Austria
"I have no special gift; I am only passionately curious." (Albert Einstein) "...when you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth." (Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, Sherlock Holmes) Many persons have a wrong idea of what constitutes true happiness. It is not attained through
self-gratification but through fidelity to a worthy purpose.
-- Helen Keller Everything is drive-through. In California, they even have a burial service called Jump-In-The-
Box.
-- Wil Shriner "Death is only a launching into the region of the strange Untried; it is but the first salutation to the possibilities of the immense Remote, the Wild, the Watery, the Unshored..." (Herman Melville, Austria Organic chemistry is the chemistry of carbon compounds. Biochemistry is the study of carbon
compounds that crawl.
-- Mike Adams If you talk to God, you are praying; if God talks to you, you have schizophrenia.
-- Thomas Szasz I'm not a member of any organized political party, I'm a Democrat!
-- Will Rogers Austria
>From the Far East I send you one single thought, one sole idea--written in red on every
beachhead form Australia to Tokyo--There is no substitute for victory!
-- General Douglas MacArthur "One should die proudly when it is no longer possible to live proudly." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) "Crime like death is not confined to the old and withered alone. The youngest and fairest are too often its chosen victims." (Charles Dickens, 1812-70, Oliver Twist) In the middle of difficulty lies opportunity.
-- Albert Einstein "The last Christian died on the cross." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Austria He who laughs last is generally the last to get the joke.
-- Terry Cohen The perfect love affair is one which is conducted entirely by post.
-- George Bernard Shaw "He who asks is a fool for five minutes, but he who does not ask remains a fool forever." (Chinese Proverb) Austria
Anything too stupid to be said, is sung.
-- Voltaire Suicide is belated acquiescence in the opinion of one's wife's relatives. I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.
- Mark Twain "The one charm about marriage is that it makes a life of deception absolutely necessary for both parties." (Oscar Wilde) Pleasure in the job puts perfection in the work.
-- Aristotle Austria If women didn't exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning.
-- Aristotle Onassis Science without religion is lame, religion without science is blind.
-- Albert Einstein "If it doesn't matter who wins or loses, then why do they keep score?" (Vince Lombardi) Austria
Nothing that was worthy in the past departs; no truth or goodness realized by man ever dies, or
can die.
-- Thomas Carlyle "What a curious phenomenon it is that you can get men to die for the liberty of the world who will not make the little sacrifice that is needed to free themselves from their own individual bondage." Dreams never hurt anybody if you keep working right behind the dreams to make as much of
them become real as you can.
-- Frank W. Woolworth "For better or for worse, our company (The News Corporation Ltd.) is a reflection of my thinking, my character, my values." (Keith Rupert Murdoch, media mogul, 1931-) The English country gentleman galloping after a fox--the unspeakable in full pursuit of the
uneatable.
-- Oscar Wilde Austria Beware of men on airplanes. The minute a man reaches thirty thousand feet, he immediately
becomes consumed by distasteful sexual fantasies which involve doing uncomfortable things in
those tiny toil When a man takes an oath, Meg, he's holding his ownself in his own hands. Like water. And if he
opens his fingers then- he needn't hope to find himself again.
-- Robert Bolt from A Man For All Seas "Those who hear not the music think the dancers mad." (Anonymous) Austria
