Silence is argument carried out by other means.
- ErnestoCheGuevara "I have great faith in fools; My friends call it self-confidence." (Edger Allen Poe) Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-
proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe
is Colleges are places where pebbles are polished and diamonds are dimmed.
-- Robert G. Ingersoll, (seen attributed to "R.S. Ingersoll" - a typo?) Learning is what most adults will do for a living in the 21st century.
- Lewis Perelman Theater A good marriage is like a casserole, only those responsible for it really know what goes in it.
-- Anonymous Diplomacy is the art of saying "Nice doggie" until you can find a rock.
-- Wynn Catlin, also attributed to Will Rogers I respect faith, but doubt is what gives you an education.
-- Wilson Mizner Theater
I do not see the EEC as a great love affair. It is more like nine desperate middle-ages couples with failing marriages meeting at a Brussels hotel for a group grope. -- Tynan The first duty of a lecturer: to hand you after an hour's discourse a nugget of pure truth to wrap up
between the pages of your notebooks, and keep on the mantlepiece forever.
-- Virginia Woolf "The English have all the material requisites for the revolution. What they lack is the spirit of generalization and revolutionary ardour." (Karl Marx) Skepticism is the chastity of the intellect, and it is shameful to surrender it too soon or to the first
comer: there is nobility in preserving it coolly and proudly through long youth, until at last Chance is always powerful. - Let your hook be always cast; in the pool where you least expect it,
there will be a fish.
-- Ovid Theater My darling wife was always glum. I drowned her in a cask of rum, And so made sure that she would stay, In better spirits night and day. Statistics have shown that mortality increases perceptibly in the military during wartime.
-- Alphonse Allais Giving every man a vote has no more made men wise and free than Christianity has made them
good.
-- H.L. Mencken Theater
"Not by wrath does one kill, but by laughter." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Technology is a way of organizing the universe so that man doesn't have to experience it.
-- Max Frisch Nobody is more dangerous than he who imagines himself pure in heart; for his purity, by
definition, is unassailable.
-- James Baldwin, Nobody Knows My Name, 1961 I dislike arguments of any kind. They are always vulgar, and often convincing.
-- Oscar Wilde There was never a child so lovely but his mother was glad to get him asleep.
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson Theater Now join your hands, and with your hands your hearts.
-- William Shakespeare, King Henry the Sixth I am not young enough to know everything.
-- Oscar Wilde "Men are wise in proportion, not to their experience, but to their capacity for experience." (George Bernard Shaw) Theater
Sir Francis Drake circumsized the world with a 100-foot clipper.
-- Unknown history student A husband is what is left of the lover after the nerve has been extracted.
- Helen Rowland If someone had told me I would be Pope one day, I would have studied harder.
-- Pope John Paul I Love begins with a smile, grows with a kiss, and ends with a teardrop.
-- Anonymous "Learn from the mistakes of others--you can never live long enough to make them all yourself." (John Luther) Theater It is not enough to succeed. Others must fail.
-- Gore Vidal An ideal wife is one who remains faithful to you but tries to be just as charming as if she weren't.
-- Sacha Guitry There ought to be one day - just one - when there is open season on senators.
-- Will Rogers Theater
I'd marry again if I found a man who had 15 million and would sign over half of it to me before the
marriage and guarantee he'd be dead within a year.
-- Bette Davis "I never resist temptation, because I have found that things that are bad for me do not tempt me." (George Bernard Shaw) Marriage is an institution in which a man loses his Bachelor's Degree and the woman gets her Masters. "Think where mans glory most begins and ends, and say my glory was I had such friends." (William Butler Yeats) "No drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of society. If we're looking for the source of our troubles, we shouldn't test people for drugs, we should test them for stupidity, ignorance, g Theater Live your questions now, and perhaps even without knowing it, you will live along some distant
day into your answers.
-- Rainer Maria Rilke "Our character is what we do when we think no one is looking." (H. Jackson Brown (Jr.) Saying that Windows95 is equal to Macintosh is like finding a potato that looks like Jesus and
believing you've witnessed the second coming.
-- Guy Kawasaki Theater
Most rock journalism is people who can't write interviewing people who can't talk for people who
can't read.
-- Frank Zappa Love, I find, is like singing. Everybody can do enough to satisfy themselves, though it may not
impress the neighbors as being very much.
-- Zora Neale Hurston No man in the world has more courage than the man who can stop after eating one peanut.
-- Channing Pollack It is much more comfortable to be mad and know it, than to be sane and have one's doubts.
- G. B. Burgin Tear open packet, unfold and use.
-- Directions on moist towelette package Theater "I fear we are not getting rid of God because we still believe in grammar." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) UGLINESS, n. A gift of the gods to certain women, entailing virtue without humility.
-- Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, 1911 He who receives an idea from me receives instruction for himself without lessening mine; as he
who lights his taper at mine receives light without darkening me.
-- Thomas Jefferson Theater
"When even one American--who has done nothing wrong--is forced by fear to shut his mind and close his mouth--then all Americans are in peril." (Harry S. Truman) "In every gathering of thirteen, expect one guest will turn out to be a Judas." (Aleister Crowley) He didn't say that. He was reading what was given to him in a speech.
-- Richard Darman, director of OMB, explaining why President Bush wasn't following up on his
campaign pledge that there would be A girl must marry for love and keep on marrying until she finds it.
-- Zsa Zsa Gabor In this world of sin and sorrow there is always something to be thankful for; as for me, I rejoice
that I am not a Republican.
-- H. L. Mencken Theater One may have a blazing hearth in one's soul and yet no one ever comes to sit by it. Passersby
see only a wisp of smoke rising from the chimney and continue on their way.
-- Vincent Van Gogh A jury consists of twelve persons chosen to decide who has the better lawyer.
Robert Frost (1874-1963) "I praise loudly. I blame softly." (Catherine the Great) Theater
"Experience is a good teacher, but she sends in terrific bills." (Minna Antrim) Integrity without knowledge is weak and useless, and knowledge without integrity is dangerous
and dreadful.
-- Samuel Johnson If pleasures are greatest in anticipation, just remember that this is also true of trouble.
-- Elbert Hubbard "It is the nature of a man as he grows older, a small bridge in time, to protest against change, particularly change for the better." (John Steinbeck, Travels With Charley) When I was a kid my favorite relative was Uncle Caveman. After school we'd all go play in his
cave, and every once in a while he would eat one of us. It wasn't until later that I found out that
Uncl Theater One may have a blazing hearth in one's soul and yet no one ever comes to sit by it. Passersby
see only a wisp of smoke rising from the chimney and continue on their way.
-- Vincent Van Gogh There's many a bestseller that could have been prevented by a good teacher.
-- Flannery O'Connor Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience. Theater
"Paper should be edible, nutritious. Inks used for printing or writing should have delicious flavors. Magazines or newspapers read at breakfast should be eaten for lunch. Instead of throwing one's mai You can complain because roses have thorns, or you can rejoice because thorns have roses.
-- Ziggy, character in comic strip by Tom Wilson It is important that students bring a certain ragamuffin, barefoot, irreverence to their studies; they
are not here to worship what is known, but to question it.
-- J. Bronowski, The Ascent of Man Weaseling out of things is good. It's what separates us from the other animals....except weasels.
-- Homer Simpson, character from The Simpsons, U.S. animated television show Before marraige a man will like awake all night thinking about something you said. After marriage
he will fall asleep before you have finished saying it.
-- Anon. Theater Marriage is a rest period between romances. Question: If you could live forever, would you and why? Answer: I would not live forever, because
we should not live forever, because if we were supposed to live forever, then we would live
forever, Ninety percent of everything is crap.
-- Theodore Sturgeon Theater
"Plato was a bore." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans is suffering from some form of
mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they're okay, then it's you.
-- Rita Mae Brown "The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time." (Abraham Lincoln, 1809-65) I drink no more than a sponge.
-- Francis Rabelais, Works. Book i. Chap. v. Education is an admirable thing, but nothing that is worth knowing can be taught.
-- Oscar Wilde Theater What is life? It is the flash of a firefly in the night. It is the breath of a buffalo in the wintertime. It is
the little shadow which runs across the grass and loses itself in the sunset.
-- Crow Do not let yourselves be discouraged or embittered by the smallness of the success you are likely
to achieve in trying to make life better. You certainly would not be able, in a single generation, to Life is no brief candle to me. It is a sort of splendid torch which I have got a hold of for the
moment, and I want to make it burn as brightly as possible before handing it on to future
generations Theater
I think 'Hail to the Chief' has a nice ring to it.
- John F. Kennedy when asked what is his favorite song "The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time." (Abraham Lincoln, 1809-65) Miracles occur naturally as expressions of love. The real miracle is the love that inspires them. In
this sense everything that comes from love is a miracle.
-- Marianne Williamson Whenever I'm caught between two evils, I take the one I've never tried.
-- Mae West The object of war is not to die for your country but to make the other bastard die for his.
-- General George Patton Theater Education is not filling a bucket, but lighting a fire.
-- William Yeats "In order to attain the impossible, one must attempt the absurd." (Miguel de Cervantes Saavedra, 1547-1616) The longer I live the more I see that I am never wrong about anything, and that all the pains that I
have so humbly taken to verify my notions have only wasted my time.
-- George Bernard Shaw Theater
