"If all men knew what others say of them, there would not be four friends in the world." (Blaise Pascal) When a cat is dropped, it always lands on its feet, and when toast is dropped, it always lands with
the buttered side down. I propose to strap buttered toast to the back of a cat; the 2 will hover,
Effort is only effort when it begins to hurt.
-- Jose Ortega y Gasset The question is not whether we will die, but how we will live.
-- Joan Borysenko The right to swing my fist ends where the other man's nose begins.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes Health I just need enough to tide me over until I need more.
-- Bill Hoest "Education is the process of driving a set of prejudices down your throat." (Martin H. Fischer) A jury consists of twelve persons chosen to decide who has the better lawyer.
Robert Frost (1874-1963) Health
I'm not a member of any organized political party, I'm a Democrat!
-- Will Rogers We can never be sure that the opinion we are endeavoring to stifle is a false opinion; and if we
were sure, stifling it would be an evil still.
-- John Stuart Mill Natural ability without education has more often attained to glory and virtue than education
without natural ability.
Cicero (106 BC - 43 BC) "Eschew the ordinary, disdain the commonplace. If you have a single-minded need for something, let it be the unusual, the esoteric, the bizarre, the unexpected..." (Chuck Jones) Asking an incumbent member of Congress to vote for term limits is a bit like asking a chicken to
vote for Colonel Sanders.
-- Bob Inglis, 1995 Health Study men, not historians.
-- Harry Truman If a thing is worth doing at all, it is worth doing badly.
-- Gustav Holst, on amateur music-making Husbands are like fires. They go out if unattended.
-- Zsa Zsa Gabor Health
When I was a boy I was told that anybody could become President; I'm beginning to believe it.
-- Clarence Darrow Opportunity may knock only once, but temptation leans on the doorbell.
-- Anonymous "Discipline is the bridge between goals and accomplishments." (Anonymous) Never try to teach a pig to sing. It's a waste of your time and annoys the pig.
-- Anon. "If you hold a cat by the tail you learn things you cannot learn any other way." (Mark Twain) Health Effort is only effort when it begins to hurt.
-- Jose Ortega y Gasset The mind has exactly the same power as the hands: not merely to grasp the world, but to change
it.
-- Colin Wilson Even death is not to be feared by one who has lived wisely.
-- Buddha Health
"There is no quality in this world that is not what it is merely by contrast. Nothing exists in itself." (Herman Melville) "See - one side of my face is gentle and kind, incapable of anything but love of my fellow man. The other side, the other profile, is cruel and predatory and evil, incapable of anything but lusts and "Give me liberty or give me death." (Patrick Henry) Love is a snowmobile racing across the tundra and then suddenly it flips over, pinning you
underneath. At night, the ice weasels come.
-- Matt Groening, Love is Hell "The last of the human freedoms is to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances." (Viktor E. Frankl) Health The wise see knowledge and action as one; they see truly.
-- Bhagava Gita Harpo, she's a lovely person. She deserves a good husband. Marry her before she finds one.
-- Oscar Levant, to Harpo Marx upon meeting Harpo's fiancee Look not mournfully into the Past. It comes not back again. Wisely improve the Present. It is
thine. Go forth to meet the shadowy Future, without fear, and with a manly heart.
-- Henry Wadsworth Lo Health
Man is the only animal that blushes--or needs to.
-- Mark Twain Nothing can so alienate a voter from the political system as backing a winning candidate.
-- Mark B. Cohen Gravitation can not be held responsible for people falling in love.
-- Albert Einstein The man who does not read good books has no advantage over the man who cannot read them.
-- Mark Twain I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.
-- Mark Twain Health "Feeding is a very important ritual for me. I don't trust people who don't like to eat." (Gina Gershon) "Have love for your friend up to a limit for it is possible he may turn into your enemy some day; and hate your enemy up to a limit for it is possible he may turn into your friend some day." (Ali bin Lawyers are... operators of the toll bridge which anyone in search of justice must pass.
-- Jane Bryant Quinn Health
My mother's menu consisted of two choices: Take it or leave it.
-- Buddy Hackett Intelligence has nothing to do with politics.
-- Londo Molari One survey found that ten percent of Americans thought Joan of Arc was Noah's wife....
-- Robert Boynton "I couldn't find the sports car of my dreams, so I built it myself." (Dr. Ferdinand Porsche) When a girl marries, she exchanges the attentions of many men for the inattention of one.
-- Helen Rowland Health I belong to Bridegrooms Anonymous. Whenever I feel like getting married, they send over a lady in a housecoat and hair curlers to burn my toast for me. -- Dick Martin "It is not the answer that enlightens, but the question." (Eugene Ionesco) "The bite of conscience, like the bite of a dog into a stone, is a stupidity." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Health
We trained hard - but it seemed that every time we were beginning to form up into teams we were
reorganized. I was to learn later in life that we tend to meet any new situation by reorganizing,
and We come to love not by finding a perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person
perfectly.
-- Anonymous Love is stronger than justice.
-- Sting "The overman ... Who has organized the chaos of his passions, given style to his character, and become creative. Aware of life's terrors, he affirms life without resentment." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietz Marriage is a romance in which the hero dies in the first chapter.
-- Anonymous Health Of the seven dwarves, only Dopey had a shaven face. This should tell us something about the
custom of shaving.
-- Tom Robbins, Skinny Legs and All My wife says if I go fishing one more time she's going to leave me. Gosh, I'm going to miss her. The Republicans have a new healthcare proposal: Just say NO to illness!
-- Mark Russell Health
I don't even butter my bread; I consider that cooking.
-- Katherine Cebrian Why don't you write books people can read?
-- Nora Joyce, to her husband James Give her two red roses, each with a note. The first note says "For the woman I love" and the
second, "For my best friend."
-- Anonymous Marriage: the only sport in which the trapped animal has to buy the license. "Talent does what it can; genius does what it must." (Edward Robert Bulwer-Lytton) Health The difference between marriage and death? Dead people are free. Marriage is a three ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering.
-- Anonymous "As a child, I thought I hated everybody, but when I grew up I realized it was just children I didn't like." (Philip Larkin) Health
I love deadlines. I especially like the whooshing sound they make as they go flying by.
-- Douglas Adams Boredom is the feeling that everything is a waste of time; serenity, that nothing is.
-- Thomas Szasz Men have become the tools of their tools.
-- Henry David Thoreau The promises of maniacs, like those of women, are not safely relied upon.
-- Joseph Heller, God Knows Love is like pi - natural, irrational, and very important.
-- Lisa Hoffman Health If I tell a lie it's only because I think I'm telling the truth.
-- Phil Gaglardi, Minister of Highways, British Columbia, Canada The difference between sex and death is that with death you can do it alone and no one is going
to make fun of you.
-- Woody Allen I have often regretted my speech, never my silence.
-- Anonymous Health
The days just before marriage are like a snappy introduction to a tedious book. It is better to be looked over than overlooked.
-- Mae West I drink no more than a sponge.
-- Francis Rabelais, Works. Book i. Chap. v. I don't mind if you don't like my manners. I don't like them myself. They're pretty bad. I grieve over
them on long winter evenings.
-- Humphrey Bogart to Lauren Bacall, in "The Big Sleep" Don't let it end like this. Tell them I said something.
-- Pancho Villa, dying words Health "Your children are not your children. They are sons and daughters of life's longing for itself. They come through you but not from you. And though they are with you, they belong not to you. You may gi blah "Each friend represents a world in us; a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it is only in meeting them that a new world is born." (Anais Nin) Why yes -- a bulletproof vest.
-- James Rodges, murderer, on his final request before the firing squad Health
"If I were still a critic, I would loathe knowing the person I was writing about. There's enough of an incestuous relationship between subject and writer." (Manny Farber, American film theorist) Music makes one feel so romantic - at least it always gets on one's nerves - which is the same
thing nowadays.
-- Oscar Wilde Worrying is like a rocking chair, it gives you something to do, but it doesn't get you anywhere.
-- Anonymous Jimmy Carter as President is like Truman Capote marrying Dolly Parton. The job is just too big for him. -- Rich Little When a girl marries, she exchanges the attentions of many men for the inattention of one.
-- Helen Rowland Health Often it does seem a pity that Noah and his party did not miss the boat.
-- Mark Twain Democracy does not guarantee equality of conditions - it only guarantees equality of opportunity.
- Irving Kristol It is never too late to be what you might have been.
-- George Eliot Health
