"As a child, I thought I hated everybody, but when I grew up I realized it was just children I didn't like." (Philip Larkin) "Children begin by loving their parents. After a time they judge them. Rarely, if ever, do they forgive them." (Oscar Wilde, A Woman of No Importance) Is fuel efficiency really what we need most desperately? I say what we really need is a car that
can be shot when it breaks down.
-- Russell Baker Don't be afraid your life will end; be afraid that it will never begin.
-- Grace Hansen "What a curious phenomenon it is that you can get men to die for the liberty of the world who will not make the little sacrifice that is needed to free themselves from their own individual bondage." Recreation and Sports There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called
marriage.
-- James Holt McGavran The church is the great lost and found department.
-- Robert Short The only thing that holds a marriage together is the husband bein' big enough to keep his mouth
shut, to step back and see where his wife is wrong.
-- Archie Bunker, character on "All in the Family, Recreation and Sports
I used to be Snow White, but I drifted.
-- Mae West If I had only known, I would have been a locksmith.
-- Albert Einstein No man in the world has more courage than the man who can stop after eating one peanut.
-- Channing Pollack The world has suffered more from the ravages of ill-advised marriages than from virginity.
-- Ambrose Bierce "If a man does not make new acquaintances as he advances through life, he will soon find himself left alone. A man, sir, should keep his friendship in a constant repair." (Samuel Johnson) Recreation and Sports Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your hearth or burn down your house, you can
never tell.
-- Joan Crawford If women didn't exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning.
-- Aristotle Onassis "I have Social Disease. I have to go out every night. If I stay home one night I start spreading rumors to my dogs." (Andy Warhol, Andy Warhol's Exposures, 1980) Recreation and Sports
A man should be taller, older, heavier, uglier, and hoarser than his wife.
-- Edgar Watson Howe As always, victory finds a hundred fathers but defeat is an orphan.
-- Count Galeazzo Ciano, The Ciano Diaries If we let people see that kind of thing, there would never again be any war.
-- Pentagon official, on why US military censored graphic footage from the Gulf War Per cubic inch, your current TV set is perhaps the dumbest appliance in your home (and I'm not
even talking about the programs).
-- Nicholas Negroponte "What is the difference between exploring and being lost?" (Dan Eldon, photojournalist) Recreation and Sports Whatever you are, be a good one.
-- Abraham Lincoln "A man who tells lies, like me, merely hides the truth. But a man who tells half-lies has forgotten where he put it." (Claude Rains, as Mr. Dryden, Lawrence of Arabia, 1962) When women go wrong, men go right after them.
-- Mae West Recreation and Sports
"The man who lets himself be bored is even more contemptible than the bore." (Samuel Butler) "Is man merely a mistake of God's? Or God merely a mistake of man's?" (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Substitute "damn" every time you're inclined to write "very"; your editor will delete it and the
writing will be just as it should be.
-- Mark Twain My wife doesn't care what I do away from home, as long as I don't enjoy it. We know the truth, not only by the reason, but also by the heart.
-- Blaise Pascal, Thoughts, Chap. x. 1., Translated by O. W. Wight Recreation and Sports If you do not tell the truth about yourself you cannot tell it about other people.
-- Virginia Woolf What do you take me for, an idiot?
- General Charles de Gaulle (1890-1970), when a journalist asked him if he was happy A friend is a gift you give yourself.
-- Robert Louis Stevenson Recreation and Sports
A coward is a hero with a wife, kids, and a mortgage.
-- Marvin Kitman We are not retreating - we are advancing in another Direction.
- General Douglas MacArthur Common sense and a sense of humor are the same thing, moving at different speeds. A sense of
humor is just common sense, dancing.
-- Clive James He who knows only his own side of the case, knows little of that.
-- John Stuart Mill NEIGHBOR, n. One whom we are commanded to love as ourselves, and who does all he knows
how to make us disobedient.
-- Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, 1911 Recreation and Sports I'm proud to be paying taxes in the United States. The only thing is - I could be just as proud for
half the money.
-- Arthur Godfrey Do not fear to be eccentric in opinion, for every opinion now accepted was once eccentric.
-- Bertrand Russell "When thou art at Rome, do as they do at Rome." (Miguel de Cervantes Saavedra, 1547-1616) Recreation and Sports
He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.
- Sir Winston Churchill Before I married, I had three theories about raising children and no children. Now, I have three
children and no theories.
-- John Wilmot, Earl of Rochester If there is any one proof of a man's incompetence, it is the stagnant mentality of a worker who,
doing some small routine job in a vast undertaking, does not care to look beyond the lever of a
machi There are trivial truths, and there are great truths. The opposite of a trivial truth is plainly false.
The opposite of a great truth is also true.
-- Neils Bohr The absolute yearning of one human body for another particular body and its indifference to
substitutes is one of life's major mysteries.
-- Iris Murdoch Recreation and Sports Marriage is not a ritual or an end. It is a long, intricate, intimate dance together and nothing
matters more than your own sense of balance and your choice of partner.
-- Amy Bloom It is amazing what you can accomplish if you do not care who gets the credit.
-- Harry Truman "In fact, most deaths are not tragic. Few people die because of a flaw in character, which is the essential element of tragedy. They just die." (John Chancellor, The News Business) Recreation and Sports
"Self confidence is the first requisite to great undertakings." (Samuel Johnson) I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body.
-- Winston Bennett, University of Kentucky basketball forward It is with true love as it is with ghosts; everyone talks about it, but few have seen it.
-- François de La Rouchefoucauld Education is a progressive discovery of our own ignorance.
- Will Durant "All grown-ups were once children, though few of them remember it." (Antoine de Saint Exupéry) Recreation and Sports "Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former." (Albert Einstein) blah "You shall find out how salt is the taste of another man's bread, and how hard is the way up and down another man's stairs." (Dante Alighieri, 1265-1321) Before I married, I had three theories about raising children and no children. Now, I have three
children and no theories.
-- John Wilmot, Earl of Rochester Recreation and Sports
"Wise men learn more from fools, than fools from the wise." (Anonymous) Age does not protect you from love but love to some extent protects you from age.
-- Jeanne Moreau Politics is for people who have a passion for changing life but lack a passion for living it.
-- Tom Robbins Love is the dawn of marriage, and marriage is the sunset of love.
-- French saying Be tolerant of the human race. Your whole family belongs to it -- and some of your spouse's
family does too.
-- Anonymous Recreation and Sports The greatest test of courage on earth is to bear defeat without losing heart.
-- Robert G. Ingersoll For most men life is a search for the proper manila envelope in which to get themselves filed.
-- Clifton Fadiman If other people are going to talk, conversation becomes impossible.
-- James McNeill Whistler Recreation and Sports
Marry not a tennis player. For love means nothing to them. Your goals, minus your doubts, equal your reality.
-- Ralph Marston Coffee is a beverage that puts one to sleep when not drank.
-- Alphonse Allais Marriage is a great institution, but who wants to live in an institution?
-- Marx Groucho, the film "Animal Crackers" "Have confidence that if you have done a little thing well, you can do a bigger thing well, too." (David Malcolm Storey) Recreation and Sports "I do not suppose I shall be remembered for anything. But I don't think about my work in those terms. It is just as vulgar to work for the sake of posterity as to work for the sake of money." (George We have to keep trying things we're not sure we can pull off. If we just do the things we know we
can do... you don't grow as much. You gotta take those chances on making those big mistakes.
-- Cybi "Experience is not what happens to a man. It is what a man does with what happens to him." (Aldous Huxley) Recreation and Sports
Joint Checking Account: a handly little device which permits my wife to beat me to the draw. Black holes are where God divided by zero.
- Steven Wright Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life.
-- Brooke Shields, during an interview to become spokesperson for a federal anti-smoking
campaign I know I'm not in government anymore. In fact I'm out of work.
-- Ronald Reagan, Former U.S. President, on a speaking tour of Japan, 1989 "Learn from the mistakes of others--you can never live long enough to make them all yourself." (John Luther) Recreation and Sports "Life is a great surprise. I don't see why death should not be an even greater one." (Vladimir Nabokov) I know a dead parrot when I see one, and I'm looking at one right now.... This is an ex-parrot.
-- John Cleese, Monty Python, British comedy television show "God is a gentleman. He prefers blondes." (Joe Orton, Loot) Recreation and Sports
"I either want less corruption, or more chance to participate in it." (Ashleigh Brilliant) "Oh, the tiger will love you. There is no sincerer love than the love of food." (George Bernard Shaw, Man and Superman) Marriages are made in heaven and consummated on Earth.
-- John Lyly To correct a natural indifference I was placed half-way between misery and the sun. Misery kept
me from believing that all was well under the sun, and the sun taught me that history wasn't
everythin "When you have nothing to say, say nothing." (Charles Caleb Colton) Recreation and Sports Consequences, schmonsequences, as long as I'm rich!
-- Chuck Jones-directed cartoon "Dreams are the touchstones of our personality." (Henry David Thoreau) Marriage is like a bank account. You put it in, you take it out, you lose interest.
-- Irwin Corey Recreation and Sports
