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"Be not afraid of greatness. Some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some have greatness thrust upon 'em." (William Shakespeare, Twelfth Night, II:5) "It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble. It's what you know for sure that just ain't so." (Mark Twain) Ordinary riches can be stolen, real riches cannot. In your soul are infinitely precious things that cannot be taken from you. -- Oscar Wilde Every mother generally hopes that her daughter will snag a better husband than she managed to do...but she's certain that her boy will never get as great a wife as his father did. -- Anonymous Television: A medium. So called because it is neither rare nor well done. -- Ernie Kovacs Restaurants and Bars Why doesn't she like me? Is it my hair, my overbite, the fact that I've worn the same shirt and shorts for the last four years? -- Bart Simpson, young character from The Simpsons, U.S. animated tele We haven't the money, so we've got to think. -- Lord Rutherford A real leader faces the music, even when he doesn't like the tune. -- Anonymous Restaurants and Bars Creativity is allowing oneself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which ones to keep. -- Scott Adams, The Dilbert Principle Ideas are like rabbits. You get a couple, learn how to handle them, and pretty soon you have a dozen. -- John Steinbeck It depends on your definition of asleep. They were not stretched out. They had their eyes closed. They were seated at their desks with their heads in a nodding position. -- John Hogan, Commonwealth Don't let it end like this. Tell them I said something. -- Pancho Villa, dying words History is more or less bunk. -- Henry Ford Restaurants and Bars Marriage is a three ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering. Happy are those who dream dreams and are willing to pay the price to make them come true. -- Anon. Love is a gross exaggeration of the difference between one person and everybody else. -- George Bernard Shaw Restaurants and Bars "The man who lets himself be bored is even more contemptible than the bore." (Samuel Butler) Here's a toast to your new bride who has everything a girl could want in her life, except for good taste in men! -- Wedding Toast Don't marry for money; you can borrow it cheaper. "If you're in a bad situation, don't worry it'll change. If you're in a good situation, don't worry it'll change." (John A. Simone Sr.) Whatever women do they must do it twice as well as men to be thought half as good. Luckily this is not difficult. -- Charlotte Whitton Restaurants and Bars What if it was cats who invented technology... would they have tv shows starring rubber sqeak toys? -- Douglas Coupland You must first have a lot of patience to learn to have patience. -- Stanislaw J. Lec "Conforming is only acceptable when you conform with a nonconformist." (John A. Simone Jr.) Restaurants and Bars Common sense and a sense of humor are the same thing, moving at different speeds. A sense of humor is just common sense, dancing. -- Clive James ... it is certain that the real function of art is to increase our self-consciousness; to make us more aware of what we are, and therefore of what the universe in which we live really is. And since A good marriage is at least 80 percent good luck in finding the right person at the right time. The rest is trust. -- Nanette Newman, British actress "No drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of society. If we're looking for the source of our troubles, we shouldn't test people for drugs, we should test them for stupidity, ignorance, g Question: Ted Kennedy: "Where was George?" Answer: Dry, sober, and at home with his wife Restaurants and Bars We love because it's the only true adventure. -- Nikki Giovanni "I don't believe people die. They just go uptown. To Bloomingdales. They just take longer to get back." (Andy Warhol) A man's wife has more power over him than the state has. -- Ralph Waldo Emerson Restaurants and Bars Marriage is like a cage--one sees the birds outside desperate to get in and those inside equally desparate to get out. -- Di Peatlins Love is stronger than justice. -- Sting When people have no other tyrant, their own public opinion becomes one. -- Edward Bulwer-Lytton "One of the good things about low self-esteem is never having rain hit you in the face." (John A. Simone Jr.) then the world 's mine oyster -- William Shakespeare, The Merry Wives of Windsor Restaurants and Bars There are those who look at things the way they are, and ask why... I dream of things that never were, and ask why not? -- Robert Francis Kennedy Skill without imagination is craftsmanship and gives us many useful objects such as wickerwork picnic baskets. Imagination without skill gives us modern art. -- Tom Stoppard The coziness between church and state is good for the state and bad for the church. -- G. K. Chesterton Restaurants and Bars Of the seven dwarves, only Dopey had a shaven face. This should tell us something about the custom of shaving. -- Tom Robbins, Skinny Legs and All I haven't committed a crime. What I did was fail to comply with the law. -- David Dinkins, New York City Mayor, answering accusations that he failed to pay his taxes. It is well, when judging a friend, to remember that he is judging you with the same godlike and superior impartiality. -- Arnold Bennett Being on the tightrope is living; everything else is waiting. -- Karl Wallenda Happy are those who dream dreams and are willing to pay the price to make them come true. -- Anon. Restaurants and Bars What's another word for "Thesaurus?" -- Steven Wright "The overman ... Who has organized the chaos of his passions, given style to his character, and become creative. Aware of life's terrors, he affirms life without resentment." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietz Marriage still confers one very special privilege - only a married person can get divorced. Restaurants and Bars I worship the quicksand he walks in. - Art Buchwald The church is the great lost and found department. -- Robert Short And life is what we make it. Always has been, always will be. -- Grandma Moses A jury consists of twelve persons chosen to decide who has the better lawyer. Robert Frost (1874-1963) All I need to make a comedy is a park, a policeman and a pretty girl. -- Charlie Chaplin Restaurants and Bars I'm not indecisive. Am I indecisive? -- Jim Scheibel, mayor, St. Paul MN I shall return. -- General Douglas MacArthur Give her two red roses, each with a note. The first note says "For the woman I love" and the second, "For my best friend." -- Anonymous Restaurants and Bars "Humanity has won its battle. Liberty now has a country." (Marquis de Lafayette) Most married couples, even though they love each other very much in theory, tend to view each other in practice as large teeming flaw colonies, the result being that they get on each other's nerves "A dress makes no sense unless it inspires men to take it off of you." (Francois Sagan) "I fear we are not getting rid of God because we still believe in grammar." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) "A man who tells lies, like me, merely hides the truth. But a man who tells half-lies has forgotten where he put it." (Claude Rains, as Mr. Dryden, Lawrence of Arabia, 1962) Restaurants and Bars Truth must necessarily be stranger than fiction, for fiction is the creation of the human mind and therefore congenial to it. -- G. K. Chesterton The right to swing my fist ends where the other man's nose begins. - Oliver Wendell Holmes At every crossroads on the path that leads to the future, tradition has placed 10,000 men to guard the past. -- Maurice Maeterlink Restaurants and Bars Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It's the transition that's troublesome. - Isaac Asimov I don't know if God exists, but it would be better for His reputation if He didn't. -- Jules Renard Our elections are free - it's in the results where eventually we pay. -- Bill Stern As for courage and will - we cannot measure how much of each lies within us, we can only trust there will be sufficient to carry through trials which may lie ahead. -- Andre Norton "In fact, most deaths are not tragic. Few people die because of a flaw in character, which is the essential element of tragedy. They just die." (John Chancellor, The News Business) Restaurants and Bars In this world of sin and sorrow there is always something to be thankful for; as for me, I rejoice that I am not a Republican. -- H. L. Mencken Ordinary riches can be stolen, real riches cannot. In your soul are infinitely precious things that cannot be taken from you. -- Oscar Wilde Epperson's law: When a man says it's a silly, childish game, it's probably something his wife can beat him at. Restaurants and Bars The artist is nothing without the gift, but the gift is nothing without work. - Emile Zola The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in the mind at the same time, and still retain the ability to function. -- F. Scott Fitzgerald I read the book of Job last night - I don't think God comes out well in it. -- Virginia Woolf Many a man that could rule a hundherd millyon sthrangers with an ir'n hand is careful to take off his shoes in the front hallway whin he comes home late at night. -- Finley Peter Dunne, Mr. Dooley O "And on the seventh day, God stepped back and said 'There is my creation, perfect in every way ... oh, damn it, I left pot all over the place. Now they'll think I want them to smoke it. Now I have to Restaurants and Bars "Truly great friends are hard to find, difficult to leave, and impossible to forget." (G. Randolf) Doctors are the same as lawyers; the only difference is that lawyers merely rob you, whereas doctors rob you and kill you too. -- Anton Chekhov One can survive everything, nowadays, except death, and live down everything except a good reputation. -- Oscar Wilde Restaurants and Bars "One of the great dangers in having a career is getting bored." (Itzhak Perlman) The Churches must learn humility as well as teach it. -- George Bernard Shaw, St. Joan Pleasure in the job puts perfection in the work. -- Aristotle Women are like tea bags; put them in hot water and they get stronger. -- Eleanor Roosevelt Elegance of language may not be in the power of all of us; but simplicity and straight forwardness are. Write much as you would speak; speak as you think. If with your inferior, speak no coarser tha Restaurants and Bars Women are the only exploited group in history to have been idealized into powerlessness. -- Erica Jong I'll sleep when I'm dead. - Warren Zevon "Fools rush in where angels fear to tread." (Alexander Pope) Restaurants and Bars
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