I don't want to achieve immortality through my work... I want to achieve it by not dying!
-- Woody Allen The less their ability, the more their conceit.
Ahad HaAm You cannot create experience. You must undergo it.
-- Albert Camus "If man could be crossed with the cat, it would improve man but deteriorate the cat." (Mark Twain) "Love matches, so called, have illusion for their father and need for their mother." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Karlovy Vary The great end of life is not knowledge, but action. What men need is as much knowledge as they
can organize for action; give them more and it may become injurious. Some men are heavy and
stupid from "Better is the enemy of good." (Francois Marie Arouet Voltaire, 1694-1778) I hate women because they always know where things are.
-- James Thurber Karlovy Vary
Vote early and vote often.
- Al Capone I have often regretted my speech, never my silence.
-- Anonymous It's never too late to have a happy childhood.
-- Tom Robbins, Still Life With Woodpecker "Some people must go to extremes to get the world in balance for themselves. Some can't bear bright lights, so wherever they go they search for the dark; they turn the lights down, anything to sustain "The only thing we have to fear is fear itself." (Franklin Delano Roosevelt, 1882 - 1945, 32nd U.S. President) Karlovy Vary There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home.
- Ken Olson, president, chairman and founder of Digital Equipment Corp., 1977 "Some people must go to extremes to get the world in balance for themselves. Some can't bear bright lights, so wherever they go they search for the dark; they turn the lights down, anything to sustain The Democrats are the party that says government will make you smarter, taller, richer, and
remove the crabgrass on your lawn. The Republicans are the party that says government doesn't
work and the Karlovy Vary
The first duty of love is to listen.
-- Paul Tillich When you steal from one author, it's plagiarism; if you steal from many, it's research.
-- Wilson Mizner He that would have the fruit must climb the tree.
-- Thomas Fuller, M.D. "Work like you don't need the money. Love like you've never been hurt. Dance like nobody's watching." (Satchel Paige) The bottom line is that (a) people are never perfect, but love can be, (b) that is the one and only
way that the mediocre and vile can be transformed, and (c) doing that makes it that. We waste
time Karlovy Vary "Goodwill is the only asset that competition cannot undersell or destroy." (Mrshall Field, businessman and philanthropist) Why don't you write books people can read?
-- Nora Joyce, to her husband James "Great spirits have always faced voilent protest from mediocre minds." (Albert Einstein) Karlovy Vary
"One will rarely err if extreme actions be ascribed to vanity, ordinary actions to habit, and mean actions to fear." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Is there life before death?
-- Belfast Graffito When you're away, I'm restless, lonely
Wretched, bored, dejected; only
here's the rub, my darling dear,
I feel the same when you are here.
-- Samuel Hoffenstein "Ninety percent of my salary I spent on booze and women ... and the other ten percent I wasted." (Tug McGraw, Major League Baseball pitcher) Marriage is a three ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering.
-- Anonymous Karlovy Vary Love: An obsessive delusion that is cured by marriage. Tact is the ability to describe others as they see themselves.
-- Abraham Lincoln I must follow the people. Am I not their leader?
-- Benjamin Disraeli Karlovy Vary
I don't know which is more discouraging, literature or chickens.
-- E. B. White "I know that God won't give me more trouble than I can handle ... but sometimes I wish he wouldn't trust me so much." (Mother Teresa) I went into a McDonald's yesterday and said, "I'd like some fries." The girl at the counter said,
"Would you like some fries with that?"
-- Jay Leno "Man is a strange animal. He generally cannot read the handwriting on the wall until his back is up against it." (Adlai Stevenson) A Code of Honor: Never approach a friend's girlfriend or wife with mischief as your goal. There
are just too many women in the world to justify that sort of dishonorable behavior. Unless she's
reall Karlovy Vary Choose the life that is most useful, and habit will make it the most agreeable.
-- Francis Bacon blah "Ability wins us the esteem of the true men; luck that of the people." (François VI Duke (duc) de La Rochefoucauld, 1616-80) When I was a kid my favorite relative was Uncle Caveman. After school we'd all go play in his
cave, and every once in a while he would eat one of us. It wasn't until later that I found out that
Uncl Karlovy Vary
Never be unfaithful to a lover, except with your wife.
-- P. J. O'Rourke Whoever called it necking was a poor judge of anatomy.
-- Groucho Marx I would have made a good Pope.
-- Richard Nixon, U.S. President "In order to attain the impossible, one must attempt the absurd." (Miguel de Cervantes Saavedra, 1547-1616) Someday is not a day of the week.
-- Anon. Karlovy Vary "I think it's about time we voted for senators with breasts. After all, we've been voting for boobs
long enough."
-- Arizona senatorial candidate Claire Sargent, on women candidates Give me a museum and I'll fill it.
-- Pablo Picasso The west wasn't won on salad.
-- ND Beef Council, billboard advertisement, 1990 Karlovy Vary
Accept the things to which fate binds you, and love the people with whom fate brings you
together, but do so with all your heart.
-- Marcus Aurelius Miracles occur naturally as expressions of love. The real miracle is the love that inspires them. In
this sense everything that comes from love is a miracle.
-- Marianne Williamson To write a good love letter, you ought to begin without knowing what you mean to say, and to
finish without knowing what you have written.
-- Jean Jacques Rousseau Art consists of limitation. The most beautiful part of every picture is the frame.
-- G. K. Chesterton Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.
-- Seen on a bumper sticker Karlovy Vary When ideas fail, words come in very handy.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe Where there is love there is life.
-- Gandhi A man who marries a woman to educate her falls a victim to the same fallacy as the woman who
marries a man to reform him.
-- Elbert Hubbard Karlovy Vary
The man who goes alone can start today; but he who travels with another must wait till that other
is ready.
-- Henry David Thoreau Democracy means simply the bludgeoning of the people by the people for the people.
-- Oscar Wilde One survey found that ten percent of Americans thought Joan of Arc was Noah's wife....
-- Robert Boynton A little girl at the wedding afterwards asked her mother why the bride changed her mind. "What
do you mean?" responded her mother. "Well, she went down the aisle with one man, and came
back with ano "Our destiny exercises its influence over us even when, as yet, we have not learned its nature: it is our future that lays down the law of our today." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Karlovy Vary I like two kinds of men: domestic and foreign.
-- Mae West I don't mind if you don't like my manners. I don't like them myself. They're pretty bad. I grieve over
them on long winter evenings.
-- Humphrey Bogart to Lauren Bacall, in "The Big Sleep" Work is the curse of the drinking class.
-- Oscar Wilde Karlovy Vary
"Over grown military establishments are under any form of government inauspicious to liberty, and are to be regarded as particularly hostile to republican liberty." (George Washington) "I'm basically an optimist in life but this doesn't prevent me from deducing as a scientist that we are probably doomed." (Vladimir Chaloupka, physicist, University of Washington, regarding mankind's He early on let her know who is the boss. He looked her right in the eye and clearly said, "You're
the boss."
-- Anonymous What does not kill me makes me stronger.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe Between men and women there is no friendship possible. There is passion, enmity, worship, love,
but no friendship.
-- Oscar Wilde Karlovy Vary What if nothing exists and we're all in somebody's dream? Or what's worse, what if only that fat
guy in the third row exists?
-- Woody Allen An economist is a man who states the obvious in terms of the incomprehensible.
-- Alfred A. Knopf I feel like Zsa Zsa Gabor's sixth husband. I know what I'm supposed to do, but I don't know how
to make it interesting.
-- Milton Berle, when called to the microphone at the 2nd Annual Comedians Hal Karlovy Vary
The executive exists to make sensible exceptions to general rules.
-- Elting E. Morison Truth often suffers more by the heat of its defenders than the arguments of its opposers.
-- William Penn blah "If we did all the things we are capable of, we would literally astound ourselves." (Thomas Alva Edison) "Eternal vigilance is the price of freedom." (Raymonde Uy) "Treat a man as he is, and he will remain as he is. Treat a man as he could be, and he will become what he should be." (Ralph Waldo Emerson) Karlovy Vary The theory used to be you marry an older man because they are more mature. The new theory is
that men don't mature. So you might as well marry a younger one.
-- Anonymous The streets are safe in Philadelphia. It's only the people who make them unsafe.
-- Frank Rizzo, ex-police chief and mayor of Philadelphia Women's liberationists spread the word that...the only peaceful family is one in which either the
wife is enslaved or the husband is androgynous.
-- R. Emmett Tyell, The Liberal Crack-Up, 1984 Karlovy Vary
"Treat a man as he is, and he will remain as he is. Treat a man as he could be, and he will become what he should be." (Ralph Waldo Emerson) We see the brightness of a new page where everything yet can happen.
-- Rainer Maria Rilke, Book of Hours I have a daughter who goes to SMU. She could've gone to UCLA here in California, but it's one
more letter she'd have to remember.
-- Shecky Greene Military justice is to justice what military music is to music.
-- George Clemenceau A new idea is delicate. It can be killed by a sneer or a yawn; it can be stabbed to death by a joke
or worried to death by a frown on the right person's brow.
-- Charles Brower Karlovy Vary Ask her to wait a moment - I am almost done.
-- Carl Friedrich Gauss, when informed that his wife was dying "One must still have chaos in oneself to be able to give birth to a dancing star." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Why don't you write books people can read?
-- Nora Joyce, to her husband James Karlovy Vary
