God is a comedian playing to an audience too afraid to laugh.
-- Voltaire We think caged birds sing, when indeed they cry.
-- John Webster Some people go to priests; others to poetry; I to my friends.
-- Virginia Woolf "One can do without people but one has need of a friend." (Chinese Proverb) Musical people always want one to be perfectly dumb at the very moment when one is longing to
be perfectly deaf.
-- Oscar Wilde U Courage is the price that Love exacts for granting peace.
-- Amelia Earhart "Dreams are the touchstones of our personality." (Henry David Thoreau) All science is concerned with the relationship of cause and effect. Each scientific discovery
increases man's ability to predict the consequences of his actions and thus his ability to control
futur U
There is no realizable power that man cannot, in time, fashion the tools to attain, nor any power
so secure that the naked ape will not abuse it. So it is written in the genetic cards - only physics One can survive everything, nowadays, except death, and live down everything except a good
reputation.
-- Oscar Wilde Meetings are an addictive, highly self-indulgent activity that corporations and other large
organizations habitually engage in only because they cannot actually masturbate.
-- Dave Barry "In all affairs it's a healthy thing now and then to hang a question mark on the things you have long taken for granted." (Bertrand Arthur William Russell, 1872-1970) All you need is love.
-- The Beatles, song title U Peculiar travel suggestions are dancing lessons from God.
-- Kurt Vonnegut, Jr., Cat's Cradle If you are going to sin, sin against God, not the bureaucracy. God will forgive you but the
bureaucracy won't.
-- Hyman Rickover A human being is a part of the whole, called by us Universe, a part limited in time and space. He
experiences himself, his thoughts and feelings as something separated from the rest--a kind of
optic U
'Tis better to have loved and lost
Than never to have loved at all.
-- Alfred, Lord Tennyson, In Memoriam, 1850, line 27, stanza 4 By the time (the Leaning Tower of Pisa) was 10% built, everyone knew it would be a total
disaster. But the investment was so big they felt compelled to go on. Since its completion, it cost
a fortune "May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house." (George Carlin) Work is the refuge of people who have nothing better to do.
-- Oscar Wilde Work is the curse of the drinking class.
-- Oscar Wilde U Don't trust anyone over 30 who used to say "Don't trust anyone over 30."
-- Anonymous If money is your hope for independence you will never have it. The only real security that a man
will have in this world is a reserve of knowledge, experience, and ability.
-- Henry Ford See what will happen if you don't stop biting your fingernails?
-- Will Rogers, to his niece on seeing the Venus de Milo U
Such is life.
-- Ned Kelly, Last words, before being hung at Old Melbourne Gaol "An able man shows his spirit by gentle words and resolute actions; he is neither hot nor timid." (Philip Dormer Stanhope Chesterfield, 4th earl of) You can't learn too soon that the most useful thing about a principle is that it can always be
sacrificed to expediency.
-- W. Somerset Maugham You are educated when you have the ability to listen to almost anything without losing your
temper or self-confidence.
-- Robert Frost Marriage is a thing which puts a ring on a woman's finger and two under the man's eyes. U "Club Secretary: I say, Lawrence. You are a clown!
Lawrence: We can't all be lion tamers." (Thomas Edward Lawrence, Lawrence of Arabia, 1962) "I think it's about time we voted for senators with breasts. After all, we've been voting for boobs
long enough."
-- Arizona senatorial candidate Claire Sargent, on women candidates Ordinary riches can be stolen, real riches cannot. In your soul are infinitely precious things that
cannot be taken from you.
-- Oscar Wilde U
There is nothing nobler or more admirable than when two people who see eye to eye keep house
as man and wife, confounding their enemies and delighting their friends.
-- Homer, Odyssey, ninth century Integrity is what we do, what we say, and what we say we do.
--Don Galer "Boredom is a vital problem for the moralist, since at least half the sins of mankind are caused by the fear of it." (Bertrand Arthur William Russell, 1872-1970) "If this is coffee, please bring me some tea; but if this is tea, please bring me some coffee." (Abraham Lincoln, 1809-65) "Courage is doing what you're afraid to do. There can be no courage unless you're scared." (Eddie Rickenbacker) U We do not have censorship. What we have is a limitation on what newspapers can report.
-- Louis Nel, Deputy Minister of Information, South Africa A person should never be ashamed to own that he is wrong, which is but saying in other words
that he is wiser today than he was yesterday.
-- Alexander Pope Good judgement comes from experience, and experience--well, that comes from poor judgement.
-- Cousin Woodman U
Peculiar travel suggestions are dancing lessons from God.
-- Kurt Vonnegut, Jr., Cat's Cradle In marriage, the bridge gets a shower. But for the groom, it's curtains! Ah Mozart! He was happily married - but his wife wasn't. -- Borge Forgive your enemies, but never forget their names.
-- John F. Kennedy Study men, not historians.
-- Harry Truman U If men knew all that women think, they'd be twenty times more daring.
-- Alphonse Karr "Nietzsche was stupid and abnormal." (Leo Tolstoy, 1828-1910) Marriage is the one subject on which all women agree and all men disagree.
-- Oscar Wilde U
Die? I should say not, dear fellow. No Barrymore would allow such a conventional thing to
happen to him.
-- John Barrymore - last words Trust, but verify.
-- Ronald Reagan A kitten is chiefly remarkable for rushing about like mad at nothing whatever, and generally
stopping before it gets there.
-- Agnes Repplier "Some people must go to extremes to get the world in balance for themselves. Some can't bear bright lights, so wherever they go they search for the dark; they turn the lights down, anything to sustain "Greed, for lack of a better word, is good. Greed is right. Greed works." (Michael Douglas, as Gordon Gekko, Wall Street, 1987) U This is the fourth?
-- Thomas Jefferson, dying words Football incorporates the two worst elements of American society: violence punctuated by
committee meetings.
-- George F. Will, journalist, political commentator, 1994 "Every act of violence increases the recruitment of terrorists. Iraq has been turned into a base of terror." (Noam Chomsky, from The Toronto Star, March 23, 2004) U
Imitation is the sincerest form of television.
-- Fred Allen The advantage of a classical education is that it enables you to despise the wealth which it
prevents you from achieving.
-- Russell Green Asking an incumbent member of Congress to vote for term limits is a bit like asking a chicken to
vote for Colonel Sanders.
-- Bob Inglis, 1995 Such is life.
-- Ned Kelly, Last words, before being hung at Old Melbourne Gaol In any organization there will always be one person who knows what is going on. This person
must be fired.
-- Conway's Law U "The rules for parents are but three... Love, Limit, and Let them be." (Elaine M. Ward) Anyone who knows anything of history knows that great social changes are impossible without
feminine upheaval. Social progress can be measured exactly by the social position of the fair sex,
the ugl Democracy is a device that insures we shall be governed no better than we deserve.
-- George Bernard Shaw U
I told my wife that a husband is like a fine wine; he gets better with age. The next day, she locked
me in the cellar.
-- Anonymous blah bl "Less is more." (Robert Browning) "I have great faith in fools; My friends call it self-confidence." (Edger Allen Poe) I myself have never been able to find out precisely what feminism is; I only know that people call
me a feminist whenever I express sentiments that differentiate me from a doormat.
-- Rebecca West, Marriage is an adventure, like going to war.
-- G. K. Chesterton U Love cures people, both the ones who give it and the ones who receive it.
-- Dr. Karl Menninger Most people would sooner die than think; in fact, they do so.
- Bertrand Russell A coward is a hero with a wife, kids, and a mortgage.
-- Marvin Kitman U
A girl must marry for love and keep on marrying until she finds it.
-- Zsa Zsa Gabor Freedom is what you do with what's been done to you.
-- John-Paul Sartre But at my back I always hear Time's winged chariot hurrying near.
- Andrew Marvell "I have learned that to be with those I like is enough." (Walt Whitman) Being a woman is of special interest only to aspiring male transsexuals. To actual women it is
merely a good excuse not to play football.
-- Fran Lebowitz U "One must still have chaos in oneself to be able to give birth to a dancing star." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) The hardest thing in the world to understand is the income tax.
-- Albert Einstein Love is not blind - it sees more, not less. But because it sees more, it is willing to see less.
Rabbi Julius Gordon U
"We live in an age when pizza gets to your home before the police." (Jeff Marder) "Guard with jealous attention the public liberty. Suspect every one who approaches that jewel. Unfortunately, nothing will preserve it but downright force. Whenever you give up that force, you are ine "Liberty means responsibility. That is why most men dread it." (George Bernard Shaw) I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it.
-- Groucho Marx Many a man owes his success to his first wife and his second wife to his success.
-- Jim Backus U "You make 'em, I amuse 'em." (Theodor Seuss Geisel, a.k.a. Dr. Seuss, 1904-1991, on children) "Defeat the fear of death and welcome the death of fear." (G. Gordon Liddy) If a man does his best, what else is there?
- General George S. Patton U
