I belong to Bridegrooms Anonymous. Whenever I feel like getting married, they send over a lady in a housecoat and hair curlers to burn my toast for me. -- Dick Martin "In the future everyone will be famous for fifteen minutes." (Andy Warhol) Marriage resembles a pair of shears, so joined that they cannot be separated; often moving in
opposite directions, yet always punishing any one who comes between them.
-- Sydney Smith Do or do not. There is no try.
-- Yoda, character in the movie The Empire Strikes Back He who laughs last has not yet heard the bad news.
-- Bertolt Brecht Travel and Tourism "You can get help from teachers, but you are going to have to learn a lot by yourself, sitting alone in a room." (Theodor Seuss Geisel, a.k.a. Dr. Seuss, 1904-1991, On becoming a writer, NY Times 21 I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like
toxic waste.
-- David Bissonette Nothing can so alienate a voter from the political system as backing a winning candidate.
-- Mark B. Cohen Travel and Tourism
"Club Secretary: I say, Lawrence. You are a clown!
Lawrence: We can't all be lion tamers." (Thomas Edward Lawrence, Lawrence of Arabia, 1962) In a novel, the hero can lay ten girls and marry a virgin for the finish. In a movie, that is not
allowed. The villain can lay anybody he wants, have as much fun and as he wants cheating,
stealing, I am ready at any time. Do not keep me waiting.
-- John Brown - last words Of course there's a lot of knowledge in universities: the freshmen bring a little in; the seniors don't
take much away, so knowledge sort of accumulates...
-- Anonymous People may or may not say what they mean ... but they always say something designed to get
what they want.
-- David Mamet Travel and Tourism Men have a much better time of it than women: for one thing they marry later, for another thing
they die earlier.
-- H. L. Mencken Some of us are becoming the men we wanted to marry.
-- Gloria Steinem "By seeing the seed of failure in every success, we remain humble. By seeing the seed of success in every failure we remain hopeful." (Mel Ziegler, founder of Banana Republic) Travel and Tourism
"Eternal vigilance is the price of freedom." (Raymonde Uy) Most people think life sucks, and then you die. Not me. I beg to differ. I think life sucks, then you
get cancer, then your dog dies, your wife leaves you, the cancer goes into remission, you get a
Being a woman is of special interest only to aspiring male transsexuals. To actual women it is
merely a good excuse not to play football.
-- Fran Lebowitz If you want to recapture your youth, just cut off his allowance.
-- Al Bernstein Marriage is very much like a violin; after the sweet music is over, the strings are attached. Travel and Tourism "The feminists used to say that chivalry and ladyhood were ways of keeping women down and preventing them from standing toe to toe with the guys. Now you've got a lot of women saying that if a guy is "There are some enterprises in which a careful disorderliness is the true method." (Herman Melville, Moby Dick) "Commit yourself to quality from day one ... it's better to do nothing at all than to do something badly." (Mark McCormack) Travel and Tourism
They were doing a full back shot of me in a swimsuit and I thought, Oh my God, I have to be so
brave. See, every woman hates herself from behind.
-- Cindy Crawford, supermodel Marriage is the process of finding out what kind of man your wife would have preferred. I am ready to meet my Maker. Whether my Maker is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me
is another matter.
- Sir Winston Churchill "It is my ambition to say in ten sentences what other men say in whole books--what other men do not say in whole books." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche, Twilight of the Idols) "Most people don't realize that large pieces of coral, which have been painted brown and attached to the skull by common wood screws, can make a child look like a deer." (Jack Handey) Travel and Tourism Reality is nothing but a collective hunch.
-- Lily Tomlin Democracy is a form of government that substitutes election by the incompetent many for
appointment by the corrupt few.
-- George bernard Shaw "Furious activity is no substitute for understanding." (H. H. Williams) Travel and Tourism
Republican boys date Democratic girls. They plan to marry Republican girls, but feel they're
entitled to a little fun first.
-- Anonymous I hate women because they always know where things are.
-- James Thurber "I couldn't find the sports car of my dreams, so I built it myself." (Dr. Ferdinand Porsche) Substitute "damn" every time you're inclined to write "very"; your editor will delete it and the
writing will be just as it should be.
-- Mark Twain A team effort is a lot of people doing what I say.
-- Michael Winner Travel and Tourism In literature as in love, we are astonished at what is chosen by others.
-- André Maurois Infatuation is when you think that he's as sexy as Robert Redford, as smart as Henry Kissinger,
as noble as Ralph Nader, as funny as Woody Allen, and as athletic as Jimmy Conners. Love is
when you r Experience is one thing you can't get for nothing.
-- Oscar Wilde Travel and Tourism
I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and
intellect has intended us to forgo their use.
- Galileo Galilei Realism is a corruption of reality.
-- Wallace Stevens Manuscript: something submitted in haste and returned at leisure.
-- Oliver Herford Who, being loved, is poor?
-- Oscar Wilde A man can't be too careful in the choice of his enemies.
- Oscar Wilde Travel and Tourism Better watch out that you won't become a television set in your next life.
--Loesje If everybody is thinking alike, then somebody isn't thinking.
-- George S. Patton, Jr. Every man knows his follies and often they are the most interesting thing he has got.
-- Josh Billings Travel and Tourism
Blessed is he who has learned to laugh at himself, for he shall never cease to be entertained.
-- John Powell "I know that God won't give me more trouble than I can handle ... but sometimes I wish he wouldn't trust me so much." (Mother Teresa) "People drag their progeny around with them like a ball and chain, like some terrible deadweight that hinders their every move - and that, as often as not, effectively winds up killing them." (Michel Democracy is the name we give the people whenever we need them.
-- Marquis de Flers Robert and Arman de Caillavet Every flower must grow through dirt.
-- Anonymous Travel and Tourism I'm not dumb, I just have a command of thoroughly useless information.
-- Calvin As always, victory finds a hundred fathers but defeat is an orphan.
-- Count Galeazzo Ciano, The Ciano Diaries It's not the size of the dog in the fight, it's the size of the fight in the dog.
- Mark Twain Travel and Tourism
"Murderers have been known to find that young girls give them more trouble than anybody else." (Jean Cocteau, Les Enfants Terribles) Idealism increases in direct proportion to one's distance from the problem.
-- John Galsworthy You can pay attention to the fact, in which case you'll probably become a mathematician, or you
can ignore it, in which case you'll probably become a physicist.
-- Len Evans, professor, Northwestern My wife says if I go fishing one more time she's going to leave me. Gosh, I'm going to miss her. Love thy neighbor, but make sure her husband is away first. Travel and Tourism A good marriage is like a casserole, only those responsible for it really know what goes in it.
-- Anonymous Thank God - every morning when you get up - that you have something to do which must be
done, whether you like it or not. Being forced to work, and forced to do your best, will breed in you
a hundre In this world of sin and sorrow there is always something to be thankful for; as for me, I rejoice
that I am not a Republican.
-- H. L. Mencken Travel and Tourism
If you would thoroughly know anything, teach it to others.
-- Tryon Edwards Having a family is like having a bowling alley installed in your brain.
-- Martin Mull Vote for the man who promises least. He'll be the least disappointing.
-- Bernard Baruch "Don't let your ego get too close to your position, so that if your position gets shot down, your ego doesn't go with it." (Colin Powell) There is a theory which states that if ever anybody discovers exactly what the Universe is for and
why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and
inex Travel and Tourism The most exciting phrase to hear in science, the one that heralds the most discoveries, is not
"Eureka!", but "That's funny..."
-- Isaac Asimov Someday is not a day of the week.
-- Anon. "Listen, or your tongue will make you deaf." (Native American Proverb) Travel and Tourism
When women go wrong, men go right after them.
-- Mae West Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It's the transition that's troublesome.
- Isaac Asimov This book fills a much-needed gap.
- Moses Hadas in a review There are three types of people in this world: Those who can count, and those who can't.
-- Seen on a bumper sticker "Liberty means responsibility. That is why most men dread it." (George Bernard Shaw) Travel and Tourism "Eschew the ordinary, disdain the commonplace. If you have a single-minded need for something, let it be the unusual, the esoteric, the bizarre, the unexpected..." (Chuck Jones) Society is like a stew. If you don't stir it up every once in a while then a layer of scum floats to the
top.
-- Ed Abbey "As is our confidence, so is our capacity." (William Hazlitt) Travel and Tourism
Good teaching is one-fourth preparation and three-fourths theater.
- Gail Godwin I never found the companion that was so companionable as solitude. we are for the most part
more lonely when we go abroad among men than when we stay in our chambers.
-- Thoreau "We're an embarrasment to college graduates across America." (James Douglas Morrison, lead singer of The Doors) "I have an unfortunate personality." (George Orson Welles) Washington is a city of Southern efficiency and Northern charm.
-- John F. Kennedy Travel and Tourism The best time to hold your tongue is the time you feel you must say something or bust.
-- Josh Billings It was a day like this Marco Polo left for China. What are your plans for today?
--Loesje What do you take me for, an idiot?
- General Charles de Gaulle (1890-1970), when a journalist asked him if he was happy Travel and Tourism
