You can't say civilization isn't advancing: in every war they kill you in a new way.
-- Will Rogers Why are women so much more interesting to men than men are to women?
-- Virginia Woolf The difference between marriage and death? Dead people are free. The church must be the critic and guide of the state, and never its tool.
-- Martin Luther King, Jr. If you are afraid of loneliness, do not marry. -- Chekhov K Good friends are good for your health.
-- Irwin Sarason Man is a rational animal who always loses his temper when he is called upon to act in
accordance with the dictates of reason.
-- Oscar Wilde Do you not know, my son, with what little understanding the world is ruled?
-- Pope Julius III K
When marriage is outlawed, only outlaws will have inlaws. If a thing is worth doing at all, it is worth doing badly.
-- Gustav Holst, on amateur music-making The death of democracy is not likely to be an assassination from ambush. It will be a slow
extinction from apathy, indifference, and undernourishment.
-- Robert Hutchins, Great Books, 1954 The majority of husbands remind me of an orangutan trying to play the violin.
-- Honore de Balzac There is nothing like returning to a place that remains unchanged to find the ways in which you
yourself have altered.
-- Nelson Mandela, A Long Walk to Freedom K Love is shown in your deeds, not in your words.
-- Fr. Jerome Cummings "How wondrous familiar is a fool!" (Herman Melville, Moby Dick) Imitation is the sincerest form of television.
-- Fred Allen K
Husband: a man who buys his football tickets four months in advance and waits until December 24 to do his Christmas shopping. A patriot must always be ready to defend his country against his government.
-- Edward Abbey Age does not protect you from love but love to some extent protects you from age.
-- Jeanne Moreau "If you do not know where you are going, any road will take you there." (Sterling Holloway, voice of Chesire Cat, Alice in Wonderland) Whenever you are asked if you can do a job, tell 'em, "Certainly, I can!" Then get busy and find
out how to do it.
-- Theodore Roosevelt K Jimmy Carter as President is like Truman Capote marrying Dolly Parton. The job is just too big for him. -- Rich Little Everything is drive-through. In California, they even have a burial service called Jump-In-The-
Box.
-- Wil Shriner "Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake whole relationships." (Sharon Stone) K
In the blithe days of honeymoon,
With Kate's allurements smitten,
I lov'd her late, I lov'd her soon,
And call'd her dearest kitten.
But now my kitten's grown a cat,
And cross like other wives.
"It wasn't until I started reading and found books they wouldn't let us read in school that I discovered you could be insane and happy and have a good life without being like everybody else." (John W Democracy does not guarantee equality of conditions - it only guarantees equality of opportunity.
- Irving Kristol I don't even butter my bread; I consider that cooking.
-- Katherine Cebrian The only thing worse than a man you can't control is a man you can.
-- Margo Kaufman K A theory is something nobody believes, except the person who made it. An experiment is
something everybody believes, except the person who made it.
-- Albert Einstein, attributed Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm.
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson "Education is a vacine for violence." (Edward James Olmos) K
"Where there's a marriage without love there will be love without marriage." (Benjamin Franklin) Thank heaven. A bachelor's life is no life for a single man.
-- Samuel Goldwyn, immigrant-turned-famous-movie-producer, when told his son was getting
married Perfection is what American women expect to find in their husbands... but English women only
hope to find in their butlers.
-- W. Somerset Maugham Under certain circumstances, profanity provides a relief denied even to prayer.
-- Mark Twain Man is the best computer we can put aboard a spacecraft...and the only one that can be mass
produced with unskilled labor.
-- Wernher von Braun K Half of the American people never read a newspaper.
Half never voted for President.
One hopes it is the same half.
-- Gore Vidal "He that would make his own liberty secure must guard even his enemy from oppression; for if he violates this duty he establishes a precedent that will reach to himself." (Thomas Paine) "Education is the process of driving a set of prejudices down your throat." (Martin H. Fischer) K
If you do not tell the truth about yourself you cannot tell it about other people.
-- Virginia Woolf The greatest homage to truth is to use it.
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson The Middle Eastern states aren't nations; they're quarrels with borders.
-- P. J. O'Rourke Wives are people who feel they don't dance enough.
-- Groucho Marx Anything is possible, but only a few things actually happen.
-- Richard Rosen K The death of democracy is not likely to be an assassination from ambush. It will be a slow
extinction from apathy, indifference, and undernourishment.
-- Robert Hutchins, Great Books, 1954 "Love is blind; friendship closes its eyes." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) When marriage is outlawed, only outlaws will have inlaws. K
Hope, like faith, is nothing if it is not courageous; it is nothing if it is not ridiculous.
-- Thornton Wilder Sometimes a scream is better than a thesis.
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson Be nice to people on your way up because you meet them on your way down.
- Jimmy Durante "The sickness of our times for me has been just this damn thing that everything has been getting smaller and smaller and less and less important, that the romantic spirit has dried up, that there is n "Experience is not what happens to a man. It is what a man does with what happens to him." (Aldous Huxley) K In the middle of difficulty lies opportunity.
-- Albert Einstein The man who goes alone can start today; but he who travels with another must wait till that other
is ready.
-- Henry David Thoreau Infatuation is when you think that he's as sexy as Robert Redford, as smart as Henry Kissinger,
as noble as Ralph Nader, as funny as Woody Allen, and as athletic as Jimmy Conners. Love is
when you r K
There are not enough Indians in the world to defeat the Seventh Cavalry.
-- George Armstrong Custer In endowing us with memory, nature has revealed to us a truth utterly unimaginable to the
unreflective creation, the truth of immortality....The most ideal human passion is love, which is
also the m "We have been the cowards lobbing cruise missiles from 2,000 miles away. That's cowardly. Staying in the airplane when it hits the building, say what you want about it, it's not cowardly." (Bill Mahe The wit of a graduate student is like champagne. Canadian champagne.
-- Robertson Davies My other wife is beautiful. K The one thing that doesn't abide by majority rule is a person's conscience.
-- Harper Lee Never practice two vices at once.
-- Tallulah Bankhead "I would rather die standing than live on my knees!" (Emiliano Zapata) K
blah "An engaged woman is always more agreeable than a disengaged. She is satisfied with herself. Her cares are over, and she feels that she may exert all her powers of pleasing without suspicion." ( "When a hundred men stand together, each of them loses his mind and gets another one." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Three o'clock is always too late or too early for anything you want to do.
- Jean-Paul Sartre Politics is for people who have a passion for changing life but lack a passion for living it.
-- Tom Robbins Being in therapy is great. I spend an hour just talking about myself. It's kinda like being the guy on
a date.
-- Caroline Rhea K Man is a natural polygamist. He always has one woman leading him by the nose and another
hanging on to his coattails.
-- H. L. Mencken The innkeeper loves the drunkard, but not for a son-in-law.
-- Yiddish Proverb We have drugs to make women speak, but none to keep them silent.
-- Anatole France K
"A man of genius makes no mistakes; his errors are volitional and are the portals of discovery." (James Joyce) Education is not filling a bucket, but lighting a fire.
-- William Yeats Talent does what it can; genius does what it must.
- Edward George Bulwer-Lytton If you haven't got anything nice to say about anybody, come sit next to me.
- Alice Roosevelt Longworth "I would rather die standing than live on my knees!" (Emiliano Zapata) K Sir, I would rather be right than be President.
-- Henry Clay, Speech, 1850, referring to the Compromise Measure I support efforts to limit the terms of members of Congress, especially members of the House and
members of the Senate.
-- Dan Quayle, Former Vice-President They gave me a book of checks. They didn't ask for any deposits.
-- Joe Early, Congressman (D-Mass), at a press conference to answer questions about the
House Bank scandal K
"A true friend stabs you in the front." (Oscar Wilde) Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake.
- Napoleon Bonaparte We haven't the money, so we've got to think.
-- Lord Rutherford Ah Mozart! He was happily married - but his wife wasn't.
-- Victor Borge "Humanity has won its battle. Liberty now has a country." (Marquis de Lafayette) K "Conscience and cowardice are really the same things. Conscience is the trade-name of the firm. That is all." (Oscar Wilde) Guide to understanding a net.addict's day:
Slow day: didn't have much to do, so spent three hours on usenet.
Busy day: managed to work in three hours of usenet.
Bad day: barely squeezed in three ho It is always incomprehensible to a man that a woman should ever refuse an offer of marriage.
-- Jane Austen K
