I have an existential map; it has 'you are here' written all over it.
- Steven Wright Marry not a tennis player. For love means nothing to them. A new idea is delicate. It can be killed by a sneer or a yawn; it can be stabbed to death by a joke
or worried to death by a frown on the right person's brow.
-- Charles Brower The honest poor can sometimes forget poverty. The honest rich can never forget it.
-- G. K. Chesterton "Boredom is a vital problem for the moralist, since at least half the sins of mankind are caused by the fear of it." (Bertrand Arthur William Russell, 1872-1970) Bielefeld A theory is something nobody believes, except the person who made it. An experiment is
something everybody believes, except the person who made it.
-- Albert Einstein, attributed Once the realization is accepted that even between the closest human beings infinite distances
continue to exist, a wonderful living side by side can grow up, if they succeed in loving the
distance "It is neccessary to have wished for death in order to know how good it is to live." (Alexander Dumas) Bielefeld
Conceit causes more conversation than wit.
-- LaRouchefoucauld My other wife is beautiful. Experience is what you get when you don't get what you want.
-- Don Stanford "I expect nothing. I fear no one. I am free." (Nikos Kazantzakis) Imagine if birds were tickled by feathers. You'd see a flock of birds come by, laughing hysterically!
-- Steven Wright Bielefeld Marriage was all a woman's idea and for man's acceptance of the pretty yoke, it becomes us to
be grateful.
-- Phyllis McGinley It is better to be feared than loved, if you cannot be both.
-- Niccolo Machiavelli, The Prince "If you assume that there's no hope, you guarantee that there will be no hope. If you assume that there is an instinct for freedom, there are opportunities to change things, there's a chance for you t Bielefeld
Don't worry about the world coming to an end today. It's already tomorrow in Australia.
-- Charles Schultz A patriot must always be ready to defend his country against his government.
-- Edward Abbey I criticize by creation - not by finding fault.
- Cicero What does not kill me makes me stronger.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe There is one thing stronger than all the armies in the world; and that is an idea whose time has
come.
-- Victor Hugo Bielefeld The more we do, the more we can do; the more busy we are the more leisure we have.
-- William Hazlitt Considering the flames and intolerance, shouldn't USENET be spelled ABUSENET?
-- Michael Meissner "Ah! Don't say you agree with me. When people agree with me I always feel that I must be wrong." (Oscar Wilde) Bielefeld
When I am working on a problem I never think about beauty. I only think about how to solve the
problem. But when I have finished, if the solution is not beautiful, I know it is wrong.
- Buckminster The only thing worse than a man you can't control is a man you can.
-- Margo Kaufman Of course there's a lot of knowledge in universities: the freshmen bring a little in; the seniors don't
take much away, so knowledge sort of accumulates...
-- Anonymous "A bore is a man who, when you ask him how he is, tells you." (Bert Leston Taylor) "I do not suppose I shall be remembered for anything. But I don't think about my work in those terms. It is just as vulgar to work for the sake of posterity as to work for the sake of money." (George Bielefeld We didn't lose the game; we just ran out of time.
- Vince Lombardi Many a man owes his success to his first wife and his second wife to his success.
-- Jim Backus You got to be careful if you don't know where you're going, because you might not get there.
-- Yogi Berra Bielefeld
Anything is possible, but only a few things actually happen.
-- Richard Rosen Democracy is a form of government that substitutes election by the incompetent many for
appointment by the corrupt few.
-- George bernard Shaw Never apologize for showing feeling. When you do so you apologize for truth.
-- Benjamin Disraeli Bigamy is one way of avoiding the painful publicity of divorce and the expense of alimony.
-- Oliver Herford "A celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to become well known, then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized." (Fred Allen) Bielefeld The difference between literature and journalism is that journalism is unreadable and literature is
not read.
-- Oscar Wilde Although the course may change sometimes, rivers always reach the sea.
-- Led Zeppelin, Ten Years Gone Marriage is a romance in which the hero dies in the first chapter.
-- Anonymous Bielefeld
"Nothing in education is so astonishing as the amount of ignorance it accumulates in the form of inert facts." (Henry B. Adams) If life were predictable it would cease to be life, and be without flavor.
-- Eleanor Roosevelt I should have no objection to a repetition of the same life from its beginning, only asking the
advantages authors have in a second edition to correct some faults of the first.
-- Benjamin Franklin "Posterity: you will never know how much it has cost my generation to preserve your freedom. I hope you will make good use of it." (John Quincy Adams) Don't ever take a fence down until you know why it was put up.
-- Robert Frost Bielefeld There are three types of people in this world: Those who can count, and those who can't.
-- Seen on a bumper sticker If you don't know how to do something, you don't know how to do it with a computer.
-- Anon. When you steal from one author, it's plagiarism; if you steal from many, it's research.
-- Wilson Mizner Bielefeld
"Majority rule only works if you're also considering individual rights. Because you can't have five wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for supper." (Larry Flynt) There's a saying among prospectors: "Go out looking for one thing, and that's all you'll ever find."
-- Robert Flaherty The only thing you take with you when you're gone is what you leave behind.
-- John Allston At the bottom no one in life can help anyone else in life; this one experiences over and over in
every conflict and every perplexity: that one is alone. That isn't as bad as it may first appear; and "Work like you don't need the money. Love like you've never been hurt. Dance like nobody's watching." (Satchel Paige) Bielefeld Before you put on a frown, make absolutely sure there are no smiles available.
-- Jim Beggs I'm astounded by people who want to 'know' the universe when it's hard enough to find your way
around Chinatown.
-- Woody Allen Familiarity breeds contempt -- and children.
-- Mark Twain Bielefeld
"In my opinion, the greatest single failure of American education is that students come away unable to distinguish between a symbol and the thing the symbol stands for." (Paul Lutus) I am returning this otherwise good typing paper to you because someone has printed gibberish all
over it and put your name at the top.
-- English Professor, Ohio University The only Zen you find on the tops of mountains is the Zen you bring up there.
-- Robert M. Pirsig I never found the companion that was so companionable as solitude. we are for the most part
more lonely when we go abroad among men than when we stay in our chambers.
-- Thoreau "Paper should be edible, nutritious. Inks used for printing or writing should have delicious flavors. Magazines or newspapers read at breakfast should be eaten for lunch. Instead of throwing one's mai Bielefeld Women: If they're not turning down your proposals for marriage, they're accusing you of
suspicious behavior in the women's lingerie changing room.
-- Cliff Clavin, character on "Cheers", U.S. Televi Trouble is a part of your life, and if you don't share it, you don't give the person that loves you
enough chance to love you enough.
-- Dinah Shore "Mothers spend a lifetime excising from their sons the influence of their fathers." (Arthur Lotti) Bielefeld
Why are women so much more interesting to men than men are to women?
-- Virginia Woolf "A dress makes no sense unless it inspires men to take it off of you." (Francois Sagan) Husband: a man who buys his football tickets four months in advance and waits until December 24 to do his Christmas shopping. The cynics are right nine times out of ten.
- Henry Louis Mencken Democracy encourages the majority to decide things about which the majority is blissfully
ignorant.
--John Simon Bielefeld Man is the only animal that laughs and has a state legislature.
-- Samuel Butler "It serves me right for putting all my eggs in one bastard." (Dorothy Parker, 1893-1967, US writer) Every child is born a genius.
-- R. Buckminster Fuller Bielefeld
Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail.
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson I don't know exactly what democracy is. But we need more of it.
-- Anonymous Chinese Student, during protests in Tianamen Square, Beijing, 1989 ARDOR, n. The quality that distinguishes love without knowledge.
-- Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, 1911 Don't worry about the world coming to an end today. It's already tomorrow in Australia.
-- Charles Schultz "A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds." (Ralph Waldo Emerson) Bielefeld "Guard with jealous attention the public liberty. Suspect every one who approaches that jewel. Unfortunately, nothing will preserve it but downright force. Whenever you give up that force, you are ine "I'm so insane, I voted for Eisenhower."
"Oh yeah, well I'm so insane, I voted for Eisenhower TWICE!"
-- Ken Kesey from "One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest" To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance
- Oscar Wilde Bielefeld
"I love to doubt as well as know." (Dante Alighieri, 1265-1321) The greatest discovery of my generation is that human beings can alter their lives by altering their
attitudes of mind.
-- William James You have to kiss a lot of toads before you find a handsome prince.
-- American Proverb "It is far better to be alone, than to be in bad company." (George Washington) Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your hearth or burn down your house, you can
never tell.
-- Joan Crawford Bielefeld "Does wisdom perhaps appear on the earth as a raven which is inspired by the smell of carrion?" (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Meetings are an addictive, highly self-indulgent activity that corporations and other large
organizations habitually engage in only because they cannot actually masturbate.
-- Dave Barry If you do not tell the truth about yourself you cannot tell it about other people.
-- Virginia Woolf Bielefeld
