Silence is as full of potential wisdom and wit as the unhewn marble of a great sculpture.
-- Aldous Huxley "Friends are those people who know the words to the song in your heart and sing them back to you when you have forgotten the words." (Anonymous) If law school is so hard to get through... how come there are so many lawyers?
-- Calvin Trillin My wife doesn't care what I do away from home, as long as I don't enjoy it. A man can't be too careful in the choice of his enemies.
- Oscar Wilde Elmshorn As far as the laws of mathematics refer to reality, they are not certain; and as far as they are
certain, they do not refer to reality.
-- Albert Einstein Common sense and a sense of humor are the same thing, moving at different speeds. A sense of
humor is just common sense, dancing.
-- Clive James Natural ability without education has more often attained to glory and virtue than education
without natural ability.
Cicero (106 BC - 43 BC) Elmshorn
In answer to the question of why it happened, I offer the modest proposal that our Universe is
simply one of those things which happen from time to time.
-- Edward P. Tryon Children are the only form of immortality that we can be sure of.
-- Peter Ustinov Well if this is the wrong number, why did you answer it?
-- James Thurber A sweetheart is a bottle of wine, a wife is a wine bottle.
-- Baudelaire People demand freedom of speech to make up for the freedom of thought which they avoid.
- Soren Aabye Kierkegaard Elmshorn What kills a skunk is the publicity it gives itself.
-- Abraham Lincoln It is a product of Einstein's genius -- taking a commonplace observation, combining it with some
simple imaginary experiments, and arriving at a revolutionary conclusion.
-- Clifford M. Wills, 1986 NEIGHBOR, n. One whom we are commanded to love as ourselves, and who does all he knows
how to make us disobedient.
-- Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, 1911 Elmshorn
"In my opinion, the greatest single failure of American education is that students come away unable to distinguish between a symbol and the thing the symbol stands for." (Paul Lutus) He who laughs last thinks slowest.
-- Seen on a bumper sticker Women want mediocre men, and men are working hard to become as mediocre as possible.
-- Margaret Mead In answer to the question of why it happened, I offer the modest proposal that our Universe is
simply one of those things which happen from time to time.
-- Edward P. Tryon One of the greatest discoveries a man makes, one of his great surprises, is to find he can do
what he was afraid he couldn't do.
-- Henry Ford Elmshorn "Nobody minds having what is too good for them." (Jane Austen) All marriages are happy. It's living together afterwards that is difficult.
-- Anonymous An economic forecaster is like a cross-eyed javelin thrower: they don't win many accuracy
contests, but they keep the crowd's attention.
-- Anonymous Elmshorn
The backbone of surprise is fusing speed with secrecy.
- Von Clausewitz "I respect faith, but doubt is what gives you and education." (Wilson Mizner) "The proper office of a friend is to side with you when you are wrong. Nearly anybody will side with you when you are right." (Mark Twain) There are some things which cannot be learned quickly, and time, which is all we have, must be
paid heavily for their acquiring. They are the very simplest things and, because it takes a man's
life A thing is not necessarily true because badly uttered, nor false because spoken magnificently.
-- St. Augustine Elmshorn To die for an idea is to set a rather high price on conjecture.
-- Anatole France Confidence is the feeling you have before you understand the situation.
--Anon. I married the first man I ever kissed. When I tell this to my children they just about throw up.
-- Barbara Bush, first lady, 1989 Elmshorn
Wives are people who feel they don't dance enough.
-- Groucho Marx "Over grown military establishments are under any form of government inauspicious to liberty, and are to be regarded as particularly hostile to republican liberty." (George Washington) There is no sincerer love than the love of food.
-- George Bernard Shaw Marriage is like a box of chocolates. You have to squeeze a few bottoms to make sure you like
what you are getting.
-- Anonymous "We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars." (Oscar Wilde) Elmshorn We are all here for a spell; get all the good laughs you can.
-- Will Rogers "If you light a man a fire, he will be warm for a day; if you light a man on fire, he will be warm for the rest of his life." (Anonymous) Working mothers are guinea pigs in a scientific experiment to show that sleep is not necessary to human life. Elmshorn
"The sickness of our times for me has been just this damn thing that everything has been getting smaller and smaller and less and less important, that the romantic spirit has dried up, that there is n No man should marry until he has studied anatomy and dissected at least one woman. -- Honore de Balzac Did you ever notice when you blow in a dog's face he gets mad at you? But when you take him in
a car he sticks his head out the window.
-- Steve Bluestone I never hated a man enough to give him his diamonds back.
-- Zsa Zsa Gabor "Children spell love...T-I-M-E." (Dr. Anthony P. Witham) Elmshorn I've always thought that underpopulated countries in Africa are vastly underpolluted.
-- Lawrence Summers, chief economist of the World Bank, explaining why we should export toxic
wastes to Third Wo Blessed is he who has learned to laugh at himself, for he shall never cease to be entertained.
-- John Powell "There is only one success: to be able to spend your life in your own way, and not to give others absurd maddening claims upon it." (Christopher Darlington Morley) Elmshorn
Sex is like bridge: If you don't have a good partner, you better have a good hand.
-- Charles Pierce "I expect nothing. I fear no one. I am free." (Nikos Kazantzakis) Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.
-- Seen on a bumper sticker Of course, it is very important to be sober when you take an exam. Many worthwile careers in the
street-cleansing, fruit-picking and subway-guitar-playing industries have been founded on a lack
of u Researchers have discovered that chocolate produces some of the same reactions in the brain
as marijuana...The researchers also discovered other similarities between the two, but can't
remember what Elmshorn "A bore is a man who, when you ask him how he is, tells you." (Bert Leston Taylor) "No drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of society. If we're looking for the source of our troubles, we shouldn't test people for drugs, we should test them for stupidity, ignorance, g "He that would make his own liberty secure must guard even his enemy from oppression; for if he violates this duty he establishes a precedent that will reach to himself." (Thomas Paine) Elmshorn
I have never taken any exercise except sleeping and resting.
-- Mark Twain The real test of friendship is: Can you literally do nothing with the other person? Can you enjoy
together those moments of life that are utterly simple? They are the moments people looks back
on at You'd be surprised how much it costs to look this cheap.
-- Dolly Parton I still live.
-- Daniel Webster, dying words "When marrying, ask yourself this question: Do you believe that you will be able to converse well with this person into your old age? Everything else in marriage is transitory." (Friedrich Wilhelm Ni Elmshorn Humanity has advanced, when it has advanced, not because it has been sober, responsible, and
cautious, but because it has been playful, rebellious, and immature.
-- Tom Robbins There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics.
-- Benjamin Disraeli "To avoid criticism: do nothing, say nothing, be nothing." (Elbert Hubbard, American author, 1856-1915) Elmshorn
Washington is a city of Southern efficiency and Northern charm.
-- John F. Kennedy "The brighter you are, the more you have to learn." (Don Herold) Imitation is the sincerest form of television.
-- Fred Allen "Mothers spend a lifetime excising from their sons the influence of their fathers." (Arthur Lotti) Marriage has many pains, but celibacy has no pleasures.
-- Samuel Johnson Elmshorn "I think all great innovations are built on rejections." (Louis-Ferdinand Céline) blah "A subject for a great poet would be God's boredom after the seventh day of creation." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Love is stronger than justice.
-- Sting Elmshorn
People never lie so much as after a hunt, during a war or before an election.
-- Otto von Bismarck Marrying a man is like buying something you've been admiring for a long time in a shop window.
You may love it when you get it home, but it doesn't always go with everything in the house.
-- Jean Ke "I heard the old, old, men say 'all that's beautiful drifts away, like the waters.'" (William Butler Yeats) "Ten people who speak make more noise than ten thousand who are silent." (Napoleon Bonaparte) I date this girl for two years--and then the nagging starts: "I wanna know your name."
-- Mike Binder Elmshorn "Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain -- and most fools do." (Dale Carnegie) I believe in getting into hot water; it keeps you clean.
-- G. K. Chesterton Show my head to the people, it is worth seeing.
-- Georges Danton, to his executioner Elmshorn
Realism is a corruption of reality.
-- Wallace Stevens My grandfather once told me that there are two kinds of people: those who work and those who
take the credit. He told me to try to be in the first group; there was less competition there.
-- INDIRA I haven't committed a crime. What I did was fail to comply with the law.
-- David Dinkins, New York City Mayor, answering accusations that he failed to pay his taxes. In times of profound change, the learners inherit the earth, while the learned find themselves
beautifully equipped to deal with a world that no longer exists.
-- Al Rogers, Global SchoolHouse Netw A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out.
-- Walter Winchell Elmshorn He that would have the fruit must climb the tree.
-- Thomas Fuller, M.D. When a girl marries, she exchanges the attentions of many men for the inattention of one.
-- Helen Rowland All that we see or seem is but a dream within a dream.
-- Edgar Allan Poe Elmshorn
