I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it.
-- Groucho Marx "Everybody knows that if you are too careful, you become so occupied in being careful that you are sure to stumble over something." (Gertrude Stein) Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed.
- George Burns Why bother with marriage? Just find a woman you hate and buy her a house. My father taught me to work; he did not teach me to love it.
-- Abraham Lincoln Education All that we see or seem is but a dream within a dream.
-- Edgar Allan Poe His ignorance is encyclopedic
- Abba Eban A jury consists of twelve persons chosen to decide who has the better lawyer.
-- Robert Frost Education
Grow old with me! The best is yet to be!
-- Robert Browning "Treat a man as he is, and he will remain as he is. Treat a man as he could be, and he will become what he should be." (Ralph Waldo Emerson) Anyone can be passionate, but it takes real lovers to be silly.
-- Rose Franken Always bear in mind that your own resolution to success is more important than any other one
thing.
-- Abraham Lincoln If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate.
-- Steven Wright Education Facts are the enemy of truth.
- Don Quixote - Man of La Mancha Whatever you are, be a good one.
-- Abraham Lincoln "Those who hear not the music think the dancers mad." (Anonymous) Education
We make a living by what we get, we make a life by what we give.
-- Winston Churchill Seek the lofty by reading, hearing and seeing great work at some moment every day.
-- Thornton Wilder When a man takes an oath, Meg, he's holding his ownself in his own hands. Like water. And if he
opens his fingers then- he needn't hope to find himself again.
-- Robert Bolt from A Man For All Seas "Plato was a bore." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) If life were predictable it would cease to be life, and be without flavor.
-- Eleanor Roosevelt Education ARDOR, n. The quality that distinguishes love without knowledge.
-- Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, 1911 "Courage is found in unlikely places." (John Ronald Reuel Tolkien) There's nothing remarkable about it. All one has to do is hit the right keys at the right time and the
instrument plays itself.
-- Johann Sebastian Bach Education
"The purpose of Compulsory Education is to deprive the common people of their commonsense." (Gilbert Keith Chesterton) Is fuel efficiency really what we need most desperately? I say what we really need is a car that
can be shot when it breaks down.
-- Russell Baker May you live happily ever after with a poor, ugly, shrewish wife. Dogma is the sacrifice of wisdom to consistency.
- Lewis Perelman It was the greatest of the imperfect ventriloquist acts: when his lips moved, her body sang.
-- Tom Robbins Education The instinct of nearly all societies is to lock up anybody who is truly free. First, society begins by
trying to beat you up. If this fails, they try to poison you. If this fails too, the finish by l Honolulu, it's got everything. Sand for the children, sun for the wife, sharks for the wife's mother.
-- Ken Dodd There's too much blood in my caffeine system.
-- Seen on a bumper sticker Education
Who, being loved, is poor?
-- Oscar Wilde Adolescence is a period of rapid changes. Between the ages of 12 and 17, for example, a parent
ages as much as 20 years.
-- Anonymous Is it better for a woman to marry a man who loves her than a man she loves.
-- Anonymous If you do not tell the truth about yourself you cannot tell it about other people.
-- Virginia Woolf "A celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to become well known, then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized." (Fred Allen) Education In the late 1600s the finest instruments originated from three rural families whose workshops
were side by side in the Italian village of Cremona. First were the Amatis, and outside their shop
hung Anything is possible, but only a few things actually happen.
-- Richard Rosen Marriage is more than four bare legs in a bed.
-- Hoshang N. Akhtar Education
When Baby's cries grew hard to bear I popped him in the Frigidaire. I never would have done so if
I'd known that he'd be frozen stiff. My wife said, "George, I'm so unhappy! Our darling's now
comple "Now that we have everything we need, we discover that there is almost nothing that we have that we want." (John Cage, M, Writings 1967 - 1972) "Oh, the tiger will love you. There is no sincerer love than the love of food." (George Bernard Shaw, Man and Superman) My opinions are my wife's, and she says I'm lucky to have them. All truth passes through three stages. First, it is ridiculed. Second, it is violently opposed. Third, it
is accepted as being self-evident.
- Arthur Schopenhauer Education If you can't convince them, confuse them.
-- Harry S. Truman Ah, well, then I suppose I shall have to die beyond my means.
-- Oscar Wilde, dying words A mathematician is a device for turning coffee into theorems.
- Paul Erdos Education
"Beauty awakens the soul to act." (Dante Alighieri, 1265-1321) A Code of Honor: Never approach a friend's girlfriend or wife with mischief as your goal. There
are just too many women in the world to justify that sort of dishonorable behavior. Unless she's
reall Question: Ted Kennedy: "Where was George?"
Answer: Dry, sober, and at home with his wife Blessed is he who has learned to laugh at himself, for he shall never cease to be entertained.
-- John Powell We live at a time when man believes himself fabulously capable of creation, but he does not
know what to create.
-- Jose Ortega y Gasset Education Everyone admits that love is wonderful and necessary, yet no one agrees on just what it is.
-- Diane Ackerman "Friends are those people who know the words to the song in your heart and sing them back to you when you have forgotten the words." (Anonymous) "One of the good things about low self-esteem is never having rain hit you in the face." (John A. Simone Jr.) Education
I drink no more than a sponge.
-- Francis Rabelais, Works. Book i. Chap. v. A problem is a chance for you to do your best.
-- Buke Ellington Life is no brief candle to me. It is a sort of splendid torch which I have got a hold of for the
moment, and I want to make it burn as brightly as possible before handing it on to future
generations If love is the answer, could you rephrase the question?
-- Lily Tomlin Love is an ocean of emotions entirely surrounded by expenses.
-- Lord Dewar Education I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial.
- Irvin S. Cobb Watching the debate this afternoon it was apparent they loved term limits in the House -- as
Brutus loved Caesar.
-- Bill Moyers No man should marry until he has studied anatomy and dissected at least one woman. -- Honore de Balzac Education
You can observe a lot by watching.
-- Yogi Berra The Churches must learn humility as well as teach it.
-- George Bernard Shaw, St. Joan A woman's always younger than a man of equal years.
-Elizabeth Barrett Browning, Aurora Leigh Cute little babies that fall out of swings - These are a few of my favourite things.
-- Oscar Hammerstein, working lyric for a piece from "The Sound of Music" "The formula for my happiness: a Yes, a No, a straight line, a goal." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Education Fanaticism consists of redoubling your efforts when you have forgotten your aim.
-- George Santayana A man should be taller, older, heavier, uglier, and hoarser than his wife.
-- Edgar Watson Howe When you've spent half your political life dealing with humdrum issues like the environment... it's
exciting to have a real crisis on your hands.
-- Margaret Thatcher, on the Falklands Conflict Education
Men. You can't live with them. You don't have to.
-- Seen on a t-shirt It's not the size of the dog in the fight, it's the size of the fight in the dog.
-- Mark Twain Whining is not only graceless, but can be dangerous. It can alert a brute that a victim is in the
neighborhood.
-- Maya Angelou Abstract art: a product of the untalented sold by the unprincipled to the utterly bewildered.
-- Al Capp Creativity is allowing oneself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which ones to keep.
-- Scott Adams, The Dilbert Principle Education You have no more right to consume happiness without producing it than to consume wealth
without producing it.
-- George Bernard Shaw "It is my ambition to say in ten sentences what other men say in whole books--what other men do not say in whole books." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche, Twilight of the Idols) "There are some enterprises in which a careful disorderliness is the true method." (Herman Melville, Moby Dick) Education
I would venture to guess that Anon, who wrote so many poems without signing them, was often a
woman.
-- Virginia Woolf Fill the unforgiving minute with sixty seconds worth of distance run.
- Rudyard Kipling Radio news is bearable. This is due to the fact that while the news is being broadcast the disc
jockey is not allowed to talk.
-- Fran Lebowitz What kills a skunk is the publicity it gives itself.
-- Abraham Lincoln We're our own dragons as well as our own heroes, and we have to rescue ourselves from
ourselves.
-- Tom Robbins Education Love is much nicer to be in than an automobile accident, a tight girdle, a higher tax bracket, or a
holding pattern over Philadelphia.
-- Judith Viorst I'm not indecisive. Am I indecisive?
-- Jim Scheibel, mayor, St. Paul MN "Avoid providing material for the drama that is always stretched tight between parents and children; it uses up much of the children's strength and wastes the love of the elders, which acts and warms Education
