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The optimist sees opportunity in every danger; the pessimist sees danger in every opportunity.
-- Winston Churchill Love is like the measles. The older you get it, the worse the attack.
-- Mary Roberts Rhinehart "Things do not change, we change." (Henry David Thoreau) When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.
-- Sacha Guitry Asking an incumbent member of Congress to vote for term limits is a bit like asking a chicken to
vote for Colonel Sanders.
-- Bob Inglis, 1995 Arts and Entertainment "When you have nothing to say, say nothing." (Charles Caleb Colton) The object of war is not to die for your country but to make the other bastard die for his.
- General George Patton To be or not to be isn't the question. The question is how to prolong being.
-- Tom Robbins Arts and Entertainment
Sometimes a scream is better than a thesis.
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson I never found the companion that was so companionable as solitude. we are for the most part
more lonely when we go abroad among men than when we stay in our chambers.
-- Thoreau It is not good enough to have a good mind; the main thing is to use it well.
-- Rene Descartes The empires of the future are the empires of the mind.
-- Winston Churchill I take my wife everywhere I go. She always finds her way back.
-- Henny Youngman Arts and Entertainment Famous remarks are very seldom quoted correctly.
-- Simeon Strunsky "Humans beings can always be relied upon to assert, with vigor, their god-given right to be stupid." (Dean Koontz, Seize the Night) Sleep is that golden chain that ties health and our bodies together.
-- Thomas Dekker Arts and Entertainment
It's never too late to have a happy childhood.
-- Tom Robbins, Still Life With Woodpecker An expert is a person who has made all the mistakes that can be made in a very narrow field.
-- Niels Bohr The time is always right to do what is right.
-- Martin Luther King, Jr. The IRS spends God knows how much of your tax money on these toll-free information hot lines
staffed by IRS employees, whose idea of a dynamite tax tip is that you should print neatly. If you
ask th When looking back, usually I'm more sorry for the things I didn't do than for the things I shouldn't
have done.
-- Malcolm Forbes Arts and Entertainment Obedience is the gateway through which knowledge, yes, and love, too, enter the mind of the
child.
-- Anne Sullivan You have no more right to consume happiness without producing it than to consume wealth
without producing it.
-- George Bernard Shaw This is the fourth?
-- Thomas Jefferson, dying words Arts and Entertainment
There is nothing like returning to a place that remains unchanged to find the ways in which you
yourself have altered.
-- Nelson Mandela, A Long Walk to Freedom A sweetheart is a bottle of wine, a wife is a wine bottle.
-- Baudelaire We must become the change we want to see.
-- Gandhi They're almost inseparable. Sometimes it takes ten people to separate them.
-- Anonymous Bigamy is one way of avoiding the painful publicity of divorce and the expense of alimony.
-- Oliver Herford Arts and Entertainment Giving every man a vote has no more made men wise and free than Christianity has made them
good.
-- H.L. Mencken It's not whether you get knocked down, it's whether you get back up.
-- Vince Lombardi "Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution yet." (Mae West) Arts and Entertainment
The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans is suffering from some form of
mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they're okay, then it's you.
-- Rita Mae Brown He can compress the most words into the smallest idea of any man I know.
- Abraham Lincoln The man who goes alone can start today; but he who travels with another must wait till that other
is ready.
-- Henry David Thoreau It's impossible to experience one's death objectively and still carry a tune.
-- Woody Allen "Most people don't realize that large pieces of coral, which have been painted brown and attached to the skull by common wood screws, can make a child look like a deer." (Jack Handey) Arts and Entertainment As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he.
-- Proverbs 23:7 There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics.
-- Benjamin Disraeli He who laughs last didn't get it.
-- Helen Giangregorio Arts and Entertainment
Duct tape is like the Force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the universe together....
-- Carl Zwanzig Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die.
- Mel Brooks The crime bill passed by the Senate would reinstate the Federal death penalty for certain violent
crimes: assassinating the President; hijacking an airliner; and murdering a government poultry
inspe Friends need not agree in everything or go always together, or have no comparable other
friendships of the same intimacy. On the contrary, in friendship union is more about ideal things:
and in that Black holes are where God divided by zero.
- Steven Wright Arts and Entertainment The church is the great lost and found department.
-- Robert Short It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks. She's not marrying the best man.
-- Anonymous Education is the state-controlled manufacture of echoes.
-- Norman Douglas Arts and Entertainment
To read a writer is for me not merely to get an idea of what he says, but to go off with him and travel in his company.
Andre Gide "Friendship is born at the moment when one person says to another, 'What?! You too! Thought I was the only one.'" (Clive Staples Lewis) Why are women so much more interesting to men than men are to women?
-- Virginia Woolf An act of love that fails is just as much a part of the divine life as an act of love that succeeds, for
love is measured by fullness, not by reception.
-- Harold Loukes Love is like pi - natural, irrational, and very important.
-- Lisa Hoffman Arts and Entertainment Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt.
-- Abraham Lincoln Honeymoon: A short period of doting between dating and debting.
-- Ray Bandy Marriage is popular because it combines the maximum of temptation with the maximum of
opportunity.
-- George Bernard Shaw Arts and Entertainment
University politics are vicious precisely because the stakes are so small.
- Henry Kissinger A friend is a gift you give yourself.
-- Robert Louis Stevenson Life is a great big canvas; throw all the paint on it you can.
-- Danny Kaye "We're all proud of making little mistakes. It gives us the feeling we don't make any big ones." (Andrew A. Rooney) Marriages are made in heaven and consummated on Earth. -- John Lyly Arts and Entertainment Work is the curse of the drinking class.
-- Oscar Wilde "Feeding is a very important ritual for me. I don't trust people who don't like to eat." (Gina Gershon) ...the fog is rising.
-- Emily Dickinson, dying words Arts and Entertainment
"The greatest of faults, I should say, is to be conscious of none." (Thomas Carlyle, 1795-1881) "If all men knew what others say of them, there would not be four friends in the world." (Blaise Pascal) Do not worry about your difficulties in mathematics. I can assure you mine are still greater.
-- Albert Einstein Happiness is nothing more than health and a poor memory.
-- Albert Schweitzer "Democracy is the recurrent suspicion that more than half of the people are right more than half of the time." (E. B. White) Arts and Entertainment "A little nonsense now and then is relished by the wisest men." (Roald Dahl) The difference between pornography and erotica is lighting.
-- Gloria Leonard Love cures people, both the ones who give it and the ones who receive it.
-- Dr. Karl Menninger Arts and Entertainment
Democracy is a process by which the people are free to choose the man who will get the blame.
-- Laurence J. Peter I tried a mail order bride, once, but she was damaged in the mail, and I had to return the unused part for my full refund. Self-reliance is the only road to true freedom, and being one's own person is its ultimate reward.
-- Patricia Sampson My wife says if I go fishing one more time she's going to leave me. Gosh, I'm going to miss her. "Most people would rather die than think; in fact, they do so." (Bertrand Arthur William Russell, 1872-1970) Arts and Entertainment What a difference there is between what we say and what we think.
-- Racine The first half of our life is ruined by our parents and the second half by our children.
-- Clarence Darrow Genius is 99 percent perspiration and 1 percent inspiration.
-- Thomas Edison Arts and Entertainment
If I were a girl, I'd despair. The supply of good women far exceeds that of the men who deserve
them.
-- Robert Graves "Employees make the best dates. You don't have to pick them up and they're always tax-deductible." (Andy Warhol, Andy Warhol's Exposures, 1980) "I would rather die standing than live on my knees!" (Emiliano Zapata) Marriage has many pains, but celibacy has no pleasures.
-- Samuel Johnson "For how can one know color in perpetual green, and what good is warmth without cold to give it sweetness?" (John Steinbeck, Travels With Charley) Arts and Entertainment "He that would make his own liberty secure must guard even his enemy from oppression; for if he violates this duty he establishes a precedent that will reach to himself." (Thomas Paine) Always do right; this will gratify some people and astonish the rest.
-- Mark Twain There are only two things a child will share willingly communicable diseases and his mother's
age.
-- Modern Maturity Arts and Entertainment
