Honorable, adj. Afflicted with an impediment in one's reach. In legislative bodies, it is customary
to mention all members as honorable; as, ``the honorable gentleman is a scurvy cur.'
-- Bierce, A An eye for an eye only leads to more blindness.
-- Margaret Atwood Every child is born a genius.
-- R. Buckminster Fuller First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win.
- Mahatma Gandhi Friends need not agree in everything or go always together, or have no comparable other
friendships of the same intimacy. On the contrary, in friendship union is more about ideal things:
and in that Recreation and Sports "A celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to become well known, then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized." (Fred Allen) Now join your hands, and with your hands your hearts.
-- William Shakespeare, King Henry the Sixth Elegance of language may not be in the power of all of us; but simplicity and straight forwardness
are. Write much as you would speak; speak as you think. If with your inferior, speak no coarser
tha Recreation and Sports
"O' What may man within him hide, though angel on the outward side!" (William Shakespeare) NEIGHBOR, n. One whom we are commanded to love as ourselves, and who does all he knows
how to make us disobedient.
-- Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, 1911 Why yes -- a bulletproof vest.
-- James Rodges, murderer, on his final request before the firing squad It is with true love as it is with ghosts; everyone talks about it, but few have seen it.
-- François de La Rouchefoucauld You may be disappointed if you fail, but you are doomed if you don't try.
-- Beverly Sills Recreation and Sports blah "There is a melancholy that stems from greatness." (Sébastien-Roch Nicolas Chamfort, 1740/41-1794) Everything that can be invented has been invented.
- Charles H. Duell, Commissioner, U.S. Office of Patents, 1899 "By seeing the seed of failure in every success, we remain humble. By seeing the seed of success in every failure we remain hopeful." (Mel Ziegler, founder of Banana Republic) Recreation and Sports
"Education is the period during which you are being instructed by somebody you do not know, about something you do not want to know." (Gilbert Keith Chesterton) With this ring I thee wed, with my body I thee worship, and with all my worldly good I thee endow.
-- Wedding Vow, Book of Common Prayer The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about nothing -- and then marry him.
-- Cher A little girl at the wedding afterwards asked her mother why the bride changed her mind. "What
do you mean?" responded her mother. "Well, she went down the aisle with one man, and came
back with ano "Man was born free and everywhere he is in chains." (Jean-Jacques Rousseau, French philosopher, The Social Contract) Recreation and Sports "Death is always and under all circumstances a tragedy, for if it is not, then it means that life itself has become one." (Theodore Roosevelt) "My wallpaper and I are fighting a duel to the death. One or the other of us has to go." (Oscar Wilde, his last recorded words) Honor lies in honest toil.
-- Grover Cleveland Recreation and Sports
The only thing you will ever be able to say in the so-called 'social' sciences is: "some do, some
don't."
-- Ernest Rutherford "There is only one thing more painful than learning from experience and that is not learning from experience." (Archibald McLeish) "I know that God won't give me more trouble than I can handle ... but sometimes I wish he wouldn't trust me so much." (Mother Teresa) A grouch escapes so many little annoyances that it almost pays to be one.
-- Kin Hubbard Govern a family as you would cook a small fish - very gently.
-- Chinese Proverb Recreation and Sports "Every great institution is the lengthened shadow of a single man. His character determines the character of the organization." (Ralph Waldo Emerson) Value your words. Each one may be the last.
-- Stanislaw J. Lec A man who has never made a woman angry is a failure in life.
-- Christopher Morley Recreation and Sports
"Children today are tyrants. They contradict their parents, gobble their food, and tyrannize their teachers." (Socrates) Many a man in love with a dimple makes the mistake of marrying the whole girl.
-- Stephen Leacock Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It's the transition that's troublesome.
- Isaac Asimov "I believe there are more instances of the abridgement of the freedom of the people by gradual and silent encroachments of those in power than by violent and sudden usurpations." (James Madison) Love: An obsessive delusion that is cured by marriage. Recreation and Sports "The monster a child knows best and is most concerned with [is] the monster he feels or fears himself to be. " (Bruno Bettelheim, child psychologist) "Great spirits have always found violent opposition from mediocrities. The latter cannot understand it when a man does not thoughtlessly submit to hereditary prejudices but honestly and courageously u The wages of sin are death, but by the time taxes are taken out, it's just sort of a tired feeling.
-- Paula Poundstone Recreation and Sports
Some men are born with cold feet; some acquire cold feet; and some have cold feet thrust upon
them.
-- Anonymous "Most people would rather die than think; in fact, they do so." (Bertrand Arthur William Russell, 1872-1970) The trouble with children is that they are not returnable.
-- Quentin Crisp The nice thing about egotists is that they don't talk about other people.
- Lucille S. Harper Why bother with marriage? Just find a woman you hate and buy her a house. Recreation and Sports Is life so dear, or peace so sweet, as to be purchased at the price of chains or slavery? Forbid it,
Almighty God! I know not what course others may take but as for me; give me liberty or give me
de Absence diminishes small loves and increases great ones, as the wind blows out the candle and
blows up the bonfire.
-- François de La Rouchefoucauld To heck with marrying a girl who makes biscuits like her mother--I want to marry one who makes dough like her father. Recreation and Sports
A husband is what's left of the lover after the nerve has been extracted.
-- Helen Rowland Marriage is a lottery in which men stake their liberty and women their happiness.
-- Madame de Rieux Honor's a good brooch to wear in a man's hat at all times.
-- Jonson, Ben "I had discovered that a person does not have to be this or be that or be anything, not even oneself. One is free." (Walker Percy, The Moviegoer) He who has a 'why' to live, can bear with almost any 'how'.
- Friedrich Nietzsche Recreation and Sports Do you not know, my son, with what little understanding the world is ruled?
-- Pope Julius III I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain
and bought jewelry.
-- Rita Rudner It is best to learn as we go, not go as we have learned.
-- Leslie Jeanne Sahler Recreation and Sports
Not everything that can be counted counts; and not everything that counts can be counted.
-- Albert Einstein My mother-in-law broke up my marriage. My wife came home from work one day and found me in
bed with her.
-- Lenny Bruce "I would rather be exposed to the inconveniences attending too much liberty than to those attending too small a degree of it." (Thomas Jefferson, to Archibald Stuart, 1791) To correct a natural indifference I was placed half-way between misery and the sun. Misery kept
me from believing that all was well under the sun, and the sun taught me that history wasn't
everythin The remarkable thing about television is that it permits several million people to laugh at the same
joke and still feel lonely.
-- T. S. Eliot Recreation and Sports When a girl marries she exchanges the attention of many men for the inattention of one.
-- Helen Rowland Long engagements give people the opportunity of finding out each other's character before
marriage, which is never advisable.
-- Oscar Wilde If it were weren't for pickpockets, I'd have no sex life at all.
-- Rodney Dangerfield Recreation and Sports
"I love Los Angeles. I love Hollywood. They're beautiful. Everybody's plastic, but I love plastic. I want to be plastic." (Andy Warhol, Holy Terror: Andy Warhol Close Up) Forgiveness does not change the past, but it does enlarge the future.
-- Paul Boese In the early sixties, we were strong, we were virulent...
-- John Connally, Secretary of Treasury under Richard Nixon, in an early 70s speech, as reported
in a contemporary "American Scholar" Infatuation is when you think that he's as sexy as Robert Redford, as smart as Henry Kissinger,
as noble as Ralph Nader, as funny as Woody Allen, and as athletic as Jimmy Conners. Love is
when you r Food, one assumes, provides nourishment; but Americans eat it fully aware that small amounts of
poison have been added to improve its appearance and delay its putrefaction.
-- John Cage Recreation and Sports Men marry because they are tired, women because they are curious; both are disappointed.
-- Oscar Wilde Whatever you are from nature, keep to it; never desert your own line of talent. Be what nature
intended you for, and you will succeed; be anything else, and you will be ten thousands times
worse tha The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in the mind at the same
time, and still retain the ability to function.
-- F. Scott Fitzgerald Recreation and Sports
"The biggest argument against democracy is a five minute discussion with the average voter." (Sir Winston Churchill, 1874-1965) This is a test. It is only a test. Had it been an actual job, you would have received raises,
promotions, and other signs of appreciation.
-- Anonymous "If liberty means anything at all, it means the right to tell people what they don't want to hear." (George Orwell) "Death where is thy sting? Love, where is thy glory?" (William Shakespeare) A liberal is a man too broadminded to take his own side in a quarrel.
-- Robert Frost Recreation and Sports "As a child, I thought I hated everybody, but when I grew up I realized it was just children I didn't like." (Philip Larkin) Never be unfaithful to a lover, except with your wife.
-- P. J. O'Rourke If you can't annoy somebody, there's little point in writing.
-- Kingsley Amis Recreation and Sports
If you have any trouble sounding condescending, find a Unix user to show you how it's done.
-- Scott Adams Never tell. Not if you love your wife... In fact, if your old lady walks in on you, deny it. Yeah. Just
flat out and she'll believe it: "I'm tellin' ya. This chick came downstairs with a sign around A man can do what he wants, but not want what he wants.
-- Arthur Schoperhauer "All grown-ups were once children, though few of them remember it." (Antoine de Saint Exupéry) "I do not agree with what you have to say, but I'll defend to the death your right to say it." (Francois Marie Arouet Voltaire, 1694-1778) Recreation and Sports Correction: Instead of being arrested, as we stated, for kicking his wife down a flight of stairs and hurling a lighted kerosene lamp after her, the Rev. James P. Wellman died unmarried four years ago A kitten is chiefly remarkable for rushing about like mad at nothing whatever, and generally
stopping before it gets there.
-- Agnes Repplier [You reporters] should have printed what he meant, not what he said.
-- Earl Bush, press aide to Richard Daley Recreation and Sports
