If God had meant us to vote, He would have given us candidates.
-- Seen on a bumper sticker There are three kinds of death in this world. There's heart death, there's brain death, and there's
being off the network.
-- Guy Almes Chase after the truth like all hell and you'll free yourself, even though you never touch its
coattails.
-- Clarence Darrow "I've just had eighteen straight whiskies. I think that's the record." (Dylan Thomas, final words) When people go to work, they shouldn't have to leave their hearts at home.
-- Betty Bender Outdoors If you are going through hell, keep going.
- Sir Winston Churchill "Death solves all problems--no man, no problem." (Josef Stalin) Blessed is he who has learned to laugh at himself, for he shall never cease to be entertained.
-- John Powell Outdoors
Being on the tightrope is living; everything else is waiting.
- Karl Wallenda Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life.
-- Brooke Shields, during an interview to become spokesperson for a federal anti-smoking
campaign If a politician found he had cannibals among his constituents, he would promise them
missionaries for dinner.
-- H. L. Mencken What is life? It is the flash of a firefly in the night. It is the breath of a buffalo in the wintertime. It is
the little shadow which runs across the grass and loses itself in the sunset.
-- Crowf Don't anthropomorphize computers -- they hate it.
-- Anonymous Outdoors True, we love life, not because we are used to living, but because we are used to loving. There is
always some madness in love, but there is also always some reason in madness.
-- Friedrich Nietzsch Experience is the name every one gives his mistakes.
-- Elbert Hubbard Love is an ocean of emotions entirely surrounded by expenses.
-- Lord Dewar Outdoors
"Education is the process of driving a set of prejudices down your throat." (Martin H. Fischer) If I have not seen as far as others, it is because giants were standing on my shoulders.
-- Hal Abelson To keep your marriage brimming, with love in the wedding cup, whenever you're wrong, admit it;
whenever you're right, shut up.
-- Ogden Nash Doctors are the same as lawyers; the only difference is that lawyers merely rob you, whereas
doctors rob you and kill you too.
-- Anton Chekhov You probably wouldn't worry about what people think of you if you could know how seldom they
do.
-- Olin Miller Outdoors I am about to--or I am going to--die; either expression is used.
-- Dominique Bouhours, French grammarian, dying words They gave me a book of checks. They didn't ask for any deposits.
-- Joe Early, Congressman (D-Mass), at a press conference to answer questions about the
House Bank scandal Disbelief in magic can force a poor soul into believing in government and business.
-- Tom Robbins Outdoors
An act of love that fails is just as much a part of the divine life as an act of love that succeeds, for
love is measured by fullness, not by reception.
-- Harold Loukes Such is life.
-- Ned Kelly, Last words, before being hung at Old Melbourne Gaol The best time to hold your tongue is the time you feel you must say something or bust.
-- Josh Billings A memorandum is written not to inform the reader but to protect the writer.
-- Dean Acheson I am about to--or I am going to--die; either expression is used.
-- Dominique Bouhours, French grammarian, dying words Outdoors It is the final proof of God's omnipotence that he need not exist in order to save us.
-- Peter De Vries Ninety percent of the game is half mental.
-- Yogi Berra "They always say time changes things, but you actually have to change them yourself." (Andy Warhol) Outdoors
They had a dispute about a night out with the boys. But he finally decided to let her go.
-- Anonymous As for the virtuous poor, one can pity them, of course, but one cannot possibly admire them.
-- Oscar Wilde Children are a poor man's riches.
-- English proverb A Sunday school is a prison in which children do penance for the evil conscience of their parents.
-- H. L. Mencken Hark, the Herald Tribune sings,
Advertising wondrous things!
-- Tom Lehrer Outdoors Having once decided to achieve a certain task, achieve it at all costs of tedium and distaste. The
gain in self-confidence of having accomplished a tiresome labor is immense.
-- Thomas Arnold Bennet Asking politicians to vote themselves out of power is like asking rabbits not to multiply, it ain't
natural.
-- Bob Beckel, on term limits, CBS This Morning, 3/30/95 "Against stupidity the very gods themselves contend in vain." (Johann Christian Friedrich von Schiller, 1759-1805, The Maid of Orleans. Act iii. Sc. 6.) Outdoors
Honolulu - it's got everything. Sand for the children, sun for the wife, sharks for the wife's mother. -- Ken Dodd Never be unfaithful to a lover, except with your wife.
-- P. J. O'Rourke Integrity without knowledge is weak and useless, and knowledge without integrity is dangerous
and dreadful.
-- Samuel Johnson Discovery consists of looking at the same thing as everyone else does and thinking something
different.
-- Albert Szent-Gyorgyi, 1937 Nobel Prize in Physiology and Medicine "A man must dream a long time in order to act with grandeur, and dreaming is nursed in darkness." (Jean Genet) Outdoors I know nothing about sex, because I was always married.
-- Zsa Zsa Gabor "What you do speaks so loudly that I cannot hear what you say." (Ralph Waldo Emerson) Marriage is bliss. Ignorance is bliss. Ergo... Outdoors
Some of us are becoming the men we wanted to marry.
-- Gloria Steinem If women didn't exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning.
-- Aristotle Onassis "He who cannot give anything away cannot feel anything either." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) "Things do not change, we change." (Henry David Thoreau) Joy is but the sign that creative emotion is fulfilling its purpose.
-- Charles Du Bos Outdoors You can't shake hands with a clenched fist.
-- Indira Gandhi If life were predictable it would cease to be life, and be without flavor.
-- Eleanor Roosevelt We seek the comfort of another. Someone to share and share the life we choose. Someone to
help us through the neverending attempt to understand ourselves. And in the end, someone to
comfort us along Outdoors
I choose a block of marble and chop off whatever I don't need.
- Francois-Auguste Rodin (1840-1917), when asked how he managed to make his remarkable
statues Good judgement comes from experience, and experience--well, that comes from poor judgement.
-- Cousin Woodman To take what there "is", and use it, without waiting forever in vain for the preconceived - to dig
deep into the actual and get something out of that - this doubtless is the right way to live.
-- H Vote early and vote often.
- Al Capone Jealousy is the only vice that gives no pleasure.
-- Anonymous Outdoors A Code of Honor: Never approach a friend's girlfriend or wife with mischief as your goal. There
are just too many women in the world to justify that sort of dishonorable behavior. Unless she's
reall In the end, everything is a gag.
- Charlie Chaplin Great Spirit, help me never to judge another until I have walked in his moccasins.
-- Sioux Indian Prayer Outdoors
The right to swing my fist ends where the other man's nose begins.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes A beauty is a woman you notice; A charmer is one who notices you.
-- Adlai Stevenson Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It's the transition that's troublesome.
- Isaac Asimov Marriage is not just a having a wife, but also worries inherited forever. For I am a bear of very little brain and long words bother me.
-- Winnie the Pooh, character from author A. A. Milne Outdoors It was very good of God to let Carlyle and Mrs Carlyle marry one another and so make only two people miserable instead of four, besides being very amusing. I went into a McDonald's yesterday and said, "I'd like some fries." The girl at the counter said,
"Would you like some fries with that?"
-- Jay Leno All that we see or seem is but a dream within a dream.
-- Edgar Allan Poe Outdoors
"A critic is a man who knows the way but can't drive the car." (Kenneth Tynan) "Somewhere, something incredible is waiting to be known." (Blaise Pascal) "Great spirits have always found violent opposition from mediocrities. The latter cannot understand it when a man does not thoughtlessly submit to hereditary prejudices but honestly and courageously u "Now that we have everything we need, we discover that there is almost nothing that we have that we want." (John Cage, M, Writings 1967 - 1972) Nobody is more dangerous than he who imagines himself pure in heart; for his purity, by
definition, is unassailable.
-- James Baldwin, Nobody Knows My Name, 1961 Outdoors Gravitation can not be held responsible for people falling in love.
-- Albert Einstein There is one thing stronger than all the armies in the world; and that is an idea whose time has
come.
-- Victor Hugo "You make 'em, I amuse 'em." (Theodor Seuss Geisel, a.k.a. Dr. Seuss, 1904-1991, on children) Outdoors
"Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain -- and most fools do." (Dale Carnegie) When ideas fail, words come in very handy.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe "I was lousy in school. Real screwed-up. A moron. I was antisocial and didn't bother with the other kids. A really bad student. I didn't have any brains. I didn't know what I was doing there. That's w The louder he talked of his honour, the faster we counted our spoons.
-- Emerson, Ralph Waldo The great thing in this world is not so much where we stand as in what direction we are going.
-- Oliver Wendell Holmes Outdoors Pleasure in the job puts perfection in the work.
-- Aristotle Marriage is like a hot bath. Once you get used to it, it's not so hot.
-- Anonymous "Commit yourself to quality from day one ... it's better to do nothing at all than to do something badly." (Mark McCormack) Outdoors
