"I'll tell you something: Luxury disgusts me." (Giorgio Armani) Every St. Patrick's Day every Irishman goes out to find another Irishman to make a speech to.
-- Shane Leslie Long engagements give people the opportunity of finding out each other's character before marriage, which is never advisable. -- Oscar Wilde Never go to bed angry. Stay up and fight.
-- Phyllis Diller I do not see the EEC as a great love affair. It is more like nine desperate middle-ages couples with failing marriages meeting at a Brussels hotel for a group grope. -- Tynan Health The worth of the state, in the long run, is the worth of the individuals composing it.
-- John Stuart Mill Love thy neighbor, but make sure her husband is away first. Not everything that is faced can be changed, but nothing can be changed until it is faced.
-- James Baldwin Health
Never try to teach a pig to sing. It wastes your time and annoys the pig.
-- Anonymous Love is temporary insanity curable by marriage.
-- Ambrose Bierce It doesn't much signify whom one marries, for one is sure to find out next morning it was
someone else.
-- Rogers A coward is a hero with a wife, kids, and a mortgage.
-- Marvin Kitman Life is like a movie--since there aren't any commercial breaks, you have to get up and go to the
bathroom in the middle of it.
-- Nick Mirov Health blah "Ability wins us the esteem of the true men; luck that of the people." (François VI Duke (duc) de La Rochefoucauld, 1616-80) Death does not concern us, because as long as we exist, death is not here. And when it does
come, we no longer exist.
-- Epicurus The theory used to be you marry an older man because they are more mature. The new theory is
that men don't mature. So you might as well marry a younger one.
-- Anonymous Health
Those parts of the system that you can hit with a hammer (not advised) are called hardware;
those program instructions that you can only curse at are called software.
-- Unknown author, Levitating T "Humanity has won its battle. Liberty now has a country." (Marquis de Lafayette) When we treat man as he is, we make him worse than he is; when we treat him as if he already
were what he potentially could be, we make him what he should be.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe For one human being to love another: that is perhaps the most difficult of our tasks; the ultimate,
the last test and proof, the work for which all other work is but preparation.
-- Rainer Maria Ril I drink no more than a sponge.
-- Francis Rabelais, Works. Book i. Chap. v. Health "Men are wise in proportion, not to their experience, but to their capacity for experience." (George Bernard Shaw) Our own heart, and not other men's opinions form our true honor.
-- Coleridge, Samuel Taylor To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance.
-- Oscar Wilde Health
To love another person is to see the face of God.
-- Lyric from Les Miserables Giving a man space is like giving a dog a computer: the chances are he will not use it wisely.
-- Bette-Jane Raphael "The sickness of our times for me has been just this damn thing that everything has been getting smaller and smaller and less and less important, that the romantic spirit has dried up, that there is n "Our character is what we do when we think no one is looking." (H. Jackson Brown (Jr.) The difference between a man who faces death for the sake of an idea and an imitator who goes
in search of martyrdom is that the former expresses his idea most fully in death while the latter
really Health The cynics are right nine times out of ten.
- Henry Louis Mencken "Nothing has been purchased more dearly than the little bit of reason and sense of freedom which now constitutes our pride." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Never regard study as a duty, but as the enviable opportunity to learn to know the liberating
influence of beauty in the realm of the spirit for your own personal joy and to the profit of the
commun Health
The two most common elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity. But not in that order.
-- Brian Pickrell The secret of success is to know something nobody else knows.
- Aristotle Onassis Black holes are where God divided by zero.
- Steven Wright I've sometimes thought of marrying, and then I've thought again.
-- Noel Coward May you live happily ever after with a poor, ugly, shrewish wife. Health The trouble with our times is that the future is not what it used to be.
-- Paul Valery Genius is an African who dreams up snow.
-- Vladimir Nabokov "A wise man among the ignorant is as a beautiful girl in the company of blind men." (Saadi) Health
Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, and half shut afterwards.
-- Benjamin Franklin It destroys one's nerves to be amiable everyday to the same human being.
-- Benjamin Disraeli Stung by the splendour of a sudden thought.
-- Robert Browning Everything should be made as simple as possible, but not simpler.
-- Albert Einstein When a thing has been said and said well, have no scruple. Take it and copy it.
-- Anatole France Health There is only one nature - the division into science and engineering is a human imposition, not a
natural one. Indeed, the division is a human failure; it reflects our limited capacity to comprehend "Freedom of press is limited to those who own one." (Henry Louis Mencken) "Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake whole relationships." (Sharon Stone) Health
The only thing you take with you when you're gone is what you leave behind.
-- John Allston A dollar saved is a quarter earned.
-- John Ciardi Now comes the mystery.
-- Henry Ward Beecher, dying words, March 8, 1887 Patriotism is the last refuge of the scoundrel.
-- Samuel Johnson The mathematician lives long and lives young; the wings of his soul do not early drop off, nor do
its pores become clogged with the earthy particles blown from the dusty highways of vulgar life.
-- Health Familiarity breeds contempt -- and children.
-- Mark Twain I'm an excellent housekeeper. Every time I get a divorce, I keep the house.
-- Zsa Zsa Gabor I do not have much patience with a thing of beauty that must be explained to be understood. If it
does need additional interpretation by someone other than the creator, then I question whether it
ha Health
He who has lost honor can lose nothing more.
-- Publilius Syrus It's not the size of the dog in the fight, it's the size of the fight in the dog.
- Mark Twain "If man could be crossed with the cat, it would improve man but deteriorate the cat." (Mark Twain) "Treat a man as he is, and he will remain as he is. Treat a man as he could be, and he will become what he should be." (Ralph Waldo Emerson) It is wrong to think that love comes from long companionship and persevering courtship. Love is
the offspring of spiritual affinity and unless that affinity is created in a moment, it will not be
cr Health "The formula for my happiness: a Yes, a No, a straight line, a goal." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) "Nothing has been purchased more dearly than the little bit of reason and sense of freedom which now constitutes our pride." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) I envy people who drink -- at least they know what to blame everything on.
-- Oscar Levant Health
"Men are wise in proportion, not to their experience, but to their capacity for experience." (George Bernard Shaw) Integrity without knowledge is weak and useless, and knowledge without integrity is dangerous
and dreadful.
-- Samuel Johnson The right to swing my fist ends where the other man's nose begins.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes Someone once asked me why women don't gamble as much as men do and I gave the
commonsensical reply that we don't have as much money. That was a true but incomplete
answer. In fact, women's total ins We never reflect how pleasant it is to ask for nothing.
-- Seneca Health "Education is the period during which you are being instructed by somebody you do not know, about something you do not want to know." (Gilbert Keith Chesterton) Sometimes I wonder if men and women really suit each other. Perhaps they should live next door
and just visit now and then.
-- Katharine Hepburn "I would rather be exposed to the inconveniences attending too much liberty than to those attending too small a degree of it." (Thomas Jefferson, to Archibald Stuart, 1791) Health
Tear open packet, unfold and use.
-- Directions on moist towelette package An act of love that fails is just as much a part of the divine life as an act of love that succeeds, for
love is measured by fullness, not by reception.
-- Harold Loukes Once the realization is accepted that even between the closest human beings infinite distances
continue to exist, a wonderful living side by side can grow up, if they succeed in loving the
distance Imitation is the sincerest form of television.
-- Fred Allen It's never too late to have a happy childhood.
-- Tom Robbins, Still Life With Woodpecker Health Be willing to make decisions. That's the most important quality in a good leader. Don't fall victim
to what I call the 'ready-aim-aim-aim-aim syndrome.' You must be willing to fire.
-- Gen. George I have come to the conclusion never again to think of marrying, and for this reason, I can never
be satisfied with anyone who would be blockhead enough to have me.
-- Abraham Lincoln, in a letter to "He who asks is a fool for five minutes, but he who does not ask remains a fool forever." (Chinese Proverb) Health
Trying to determine what is going on in the world by reading newspapers is like trying to tell the
time by watching the second hand of a clock.
-- Ben Hecht Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail.
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson There's no problem so awful that you can't add some guilt to it and make it even worse!
-- Calvin "Somewhere, something incredible is waiting to be known." (Blaise Pascal) In matrimony, to hesitate is sometimes to be saved.
-- Samuel Butler Health Sir Francis Drake circumsized the world with a 100-foot clipper.
-- Unknown history student Thus the metric system did not really catch on in the States, unless you count the increasing
popularity of the nine-millimeter bullet.
-- Dave Barry May you live happily ever after with a poor, ugly, shrewish wife. Health
