"Politics is my hobby. Smut is my vocation." (Larry Flynt) Most people are more comfortable with old problems than with new solutions.
-- Anonymous Women's liberationists spread the word that...the only peaceful family is one in which either the
wife is enslaved or the husband is androgynous.
-- R. Emmett Tyell, The Liberal Crack-Up, 1984 The IRS spends God knows how much of your tax money on these toll-free information hot lines
staffed by IRS employees, whose idea of a dynamite tax tip is that you should print neatly. If you
ask th A woman has got to love a bad man once or twice in her life to be thankful for a good one.
-- Mae West Organizations When you are right, you cannot be too radical; When you are wrong, you cannot be too
conservative.
-- Martin Luther King, Jr. One of the greatest discoveries a man makes, one of his great surprises, is to find he can do
what he was afraid he couldn't do.
-- Henry Ford No matter who you vote for, the Government always gets in.
-- Anon. Organizations
Bachelor: the only man who has never told his wife a lie. Love is a snowmobile racing across the tundra and then suddenly it flips over, pinning you
underneath. At night, the ice weasels come.
-- Matt Groening, Love is Hell Jimmy Carter as President is like Truman Capote marrying Dolly Parton. The job is just too big for him. -- Rich Little A man should be taller, older, heavier, uglier, and hoarser than his wife.
-- Edgar Watson Howe "To forget one's purpose is the commonest form of stupidity." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Organizations Don't trust anyone over 30 who used to say "Don't trust anyone over 30."
-- Anonymous I know nothing about sex, because I was always married.
-- Zsa Zsa Gabor If you want to sing out, sing out, and if you want to be free, be free, 'cause there's a million ways
to be, you know that there are...
-- Cat Stevens, from a song lyric Organizations
Curiosity will conquer fear even more than bravery will.
-- James Stephens A man's reach should exeed his grasp, or else what's a heaven for?
-- Robert Browning "Ten people who speak make more noise than ten thousand who are silent." (Napoleon Bonaparte) As far as the laws of mathematics refer to reality, they are not certain; and as far as they are
certain, they do not refer to reality.
-- Albert Einstein I believe in equality for everyone, except reporters and photographers.
-- Gandhi Organizations Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.
-- Carl Gustav Jung "If you want to make enemies, try to change something." (Woodrow Wilson, 28th US president, 1856-1924) "Fools rush in where angels fear to tread." (Alexander Pope) Organizations
The average Ph.D thesis is nothing but the transference of bones from one graveyard to another.
-- Frank J. Dobie, A Texan in England, 1945 A woman seldom asks advice before she has bought her wedding clothes.
-- Joseph Addison What do I dislike about death? Must be the hours.
-- Woody Allen "The order of the world is always right - such is the judgment of God. For God has departed, but he has left his judgment behind, the way the Cheshire Cat left his grin." (Jean Baudrillard) The great advantage of being in a rut is that when one is in a rut, one knows exactly where one
is.
-- Arnold Bennett Organizations blah "There is a melancholy that stems from greatness." (Sébastien-Roch Nicolas Chamfort, 1740/41-1794) When the mouse laughs at the cat, there is a hole nearby.
-- Nigerian Proverb "Nietzsche was stupid and abnormal." (Leo Tolstoy, 1828-1910) Organizations
Asking an incumbent member of Congress to vote for term limits is a bit like asking a chicken to
vote for Colonel Sanders.
-- Bob Inglis, 1995 "Let no one be discouraged by the belief there is nothing one person can do against the enormous array of the world's ills, misery, ignorance, and violence. Few will have the greatness to bend history Someday is not a day of the week.
-- Anon. Marriage is a romance in which the heroine dies in the first chapter.
-- Cecilia Egan In literature as in love, we are astonished at what is chosen by others.
-- André Maurois Organizations It is best to learn as we go, not go as we have learned.
-- Leslie Jeanne Sahler "We always get bored with those whom we bore." (François VI Duke (duc) de La Rochefoucauld, 1616-80) If there is any one proof of a man's incompetence, it is the stagnant mentality of a worker who,
doing some small routine job in a vast undertaking, does not care to look beyond the lever of a
machi Organizations
"Those that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety." (Benjamin Franklin) Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the
really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.
-- Mark Twain Love matches are made by people who are content, for a month of honey, to condemn
themselves to a life of vinegar.
-- Countess of Blessington People say "I want peace." If you remove I {ego}, and your want {desire}, you are left with peace.
-- Satya Sai Baba If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?
-- Abraham Lincoln Organizations I am free of all prejudice. I hate everyone equally.
-- W. C. Fields Once all struggle is grasped, miracles are possible.
-- Mao Tse-tung "There is nothing like returning to a place that remains unchanged to find the ways in which you yourself have altered." (Nelson Mandela, A Long Walk to Freedom) Organizations
All women are born evil. Some just realize their potential later in life than others.
-- Chad A. Gamble, Escape, short story "Learn from the mistakes of others--you can never live long enough to make them all yourself." (John Luther) It is better to be hated for what you are than to be loved for what you are not.
-- Andre Gide Let the refining and improving of your own life keep you so busy that you have little time to
criticize others.
-- H. Jackson Brown Many a man owes his success to his first wife and his second wife to his success.
-- Jim Backus Organizations He who knows only his own side of the case, knows little of that.
-- John Stuart Mill Despite the high cost of living it remains a popular item.
-- Anonymous Love matches are made by people who are content, for a month of honey, to condemn
themselves to a life of vinegar.
-- Countess of Blessington Organizations
"Posterity: you will never know how much it has cost my generation to preserve your freedom. I hope you will make good use of it." (John Quincy Adams) "Liberty means responsibility. That is why most men dread it." (George Bernard Shaw) Do not fear to be eccentric in opinion, for every opinion now accepted was once eccentric.
-- Bertrand Russell "I've never let my school interfere with my education." (Mark Twain) "An imbalance between rich and poor is the oldest and most fatal ailment of all republics." (Plutarch) Organizations Blessed are the young for they shall inherit the national debt.
-- Herbert Hoover The public have an insatiable curiosity to know everything. Except what is worth knowing.
Journalism, conscious of this, and having tradesman-like habits, supplies their demands.
-- Oscar Wilde the social sciences were for all those who had not yet decided what to do with their lives, and for
all those whose premature frustrations led them into the sterile alleys of confrontation.
-- Peter Organizations
English Law prohibits a man from marrying his mother-in-law. This is our idea of useless legislation. If I were a girl, I'd despair. The supply of good women far exceeds that of the men who deserve
them.
-- Robert Graves "The sickness of our times for me has been just this damn thing that everything has been getting smaller and smaller and less and less important, that the romantic spirit has dried up, that there is n Friends may come and go, but enemies accumulate.
-- Thomas Jones Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed.
- George Burns Organizations Conservatives are not necessarily stupid, but most stupid people are conservatives.
-- John Stuart Mill My darling wife was always glum. I drowned her in a cask of rum, And so made sure that she would stay, In better spirits night and day. Celestial navigation is based on the premise that the Earth is the center of the universe. The
premise is wrong, but the navigation works. An incorrect model can be a useful tool.
-- Kelvin Throop I Organizations
The church is the great lost and found department.
-- Robert Short I am returning this otherwise good typing paper to you because someone has printed gibberish all
over it and put your name at the top.
-- English Professor, Ohio University Be tolerant of the human race. Your whole family belongs to it -- and some of your spouse's
family does too.
-- Anonymous What is life? It is the flash of a firefly in the night. It is the breath of a buffalo in the wintertime. It is
the little shadow which runs across the grass and loses itself in the sunset.
-- Crow We are not in a position in which we have nothing to work with. We already have capacities,
talents, direction, missions, callings.
-- Abraham Maslow Organizations People think we make $3 million and $4 million a year. They don't realize that most of us only
make $500,000.
-- Pete Incaviglia, baseball player, 1990 "What is the difference between exploring and being lost?" (Dan Eldon, photojournalist) "REASONABLE, adj. Accessible to the infection of our own opinions. Hospitable to persuasion, dissuasion and evasion." (Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary) Organizations
Fashion is a form of ugliness so intolerable that we have to alter it every six months.
-- Oscar Wilde There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage. -- James Holt McGavran "Contrariwise," continued Tweedledee, "if it was so, it might be, and if it were so, it would be; but
as it isn't, it ain't. That's logic!"
-- Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland You never see a man walking down the street with a woman who has a little pot belly and a bald
spot.
-- Elayne Boosler Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It's the transition that's troublesome.
- Isaac Asimov Organizations "There is only one success: to be able to spend your life in your own way, and not to give others absurd maddening claims upon it." (Christopher Darlington Morley) Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go.
-- T.S. Eliot "When even one American--who has done nothing wrong--is forced by fear to shut his mind and close his mouth--then all Americans are in peril." (Harry S. Truman) Organizations
