"An able man shows his spirit by gentle words and resolute actions; he is neither hot nor timid." (Philip Dormer Stanhope Chesterfield, 4th earl of) Show me a sane man and I will cure him for you.
- Carl Gustav Jung Never marry for money. Ye'll borrow it cheaper.
-- Scottish Proverb A Sunday school is a prison in which children do penance for the evil conscience of their parents.
-- H. L. Mencken The only way to entertain some folks is to listen to them.
-- Kin Hubbard Health Always do right; this will gratify some people and astonish the rest.
-- Mark Twain If a politician found he had cannibals among his constituents, he would promise them
missionaries for dinner.
-- H. L. Mencken Good-bye. I am leaving because I am bored.
-- George Saunders - last words Health
What's another word for "Thesaurus?"
-- Steven Wright "I'm the artist formally known as Beck. I have a genius wig. When I put that wig on, then the true genius emerges. I don't have enough hair to be a genius. I think you have to have hair going everywhe Whoever called it necking was a poor judge of anatomy.
-- Groucho Marx When a man takes an oath, Meg, he's holding his ownself in his own hands. Like water. And if he
opens his fingers then- he needn't hope to find himself again.
-- Robert Bolt from A Man For All Seas I don't know which is more discouraging, literature or chickens.
-- E. B. White Health My theology, briefly, is that the universe was dictated but not signed.
-- Christopher Morley I have read your book and much like it.
-- Moses Hadas, book reviewer "Death where is thy sting? Love, where is thy glory?" (William Shakespeare) Health
Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I'm not
there, I go to work.
- Robert Orben Science without religion is lame, religion without science is blind.
-- Albert Einstein Vote for the man who promises least. He'll be the least disappointing.
-- Bernard Baruch Morality consists in suspecting other people of not being legally married.
-- George Bernard Shaw Marriage is a great institution, but who wants to live in an institution?
-- Marx Groucho, the film "Animal Crackers" Health To love someone deeply gives you strength. Being loved by someone deeply gives you courage.
-- Lao Tzu Watching the debate this afternoon it was apparent they loved term limits in the House -- as
Brutus loved Caesar.
-- Bill Moyers Every mother generally hopes that her daughter will snag a better husband than she managed to
do...but she's certain that her boy will never get as great a wife as his father did.
-- Anonymous Health
Not only is there no God, but try finding a plumber on Sunday.
-- Woody Allen "Nobody minds having what is too good for them." (Jane Austen) Love is an ideal thing, marriage a real thing; a confusion of the real with the ideal never goes
unpunished.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe Some people talk in their sleep. Lecturers talk while other people sleep.
-- Albert Camus "The first duty of a revolutionary is to get away with it." (Abbie Hoffman) Health The wit of a graduate student is like champagne. Canadian champagne.
-- Robertson Davies "I've just had eighteen straight whiskies. I think that's the record." (Dylan Thomas, final words) The coziness between church and state is good for the state and bad for the church.
-- G. K. Chesterton Health
Heav'n hath no rage like love to hatred turn'd, Nor Hell a fury, like a woman scorn'd.
-- William Congreve "Education is a vacine for violence." (Edward James Olmos) Do not assume that she who seeks to comfort you now, lives untroubled among the simple and
quiet words that sometimes do you good. Her life may also have much sadness and difficulty, that
remains fa "Who is more foolish? The fool or the fool that follows it?" (Alec Guinness) When you gaze long into the abyss, the abyss also gazes into you.
- Friedrich Nietzsche Health Say goodbye to the oldies, but goodies, because the good old days weren't always good and
tomorrow aint as bad as it seems.
-- Billy Joel "I always thought a dog-lover was a dog who loved another dog." (James Thurber) Marriage is the process of finding out what kind of man your wife would have preferred. Health
Thought is action in rehearsal.
-- Sigmund Freud Saying that men talk about baseball in order to avoid talking about their feelings is the same as
saying that women talk about their feelings in order to avoid talking about baseball.
-- Deborah Tan When you gaze long into the abyss, the abyss also gazes into you.
- Friedrich Nietzsche I believe God is managing affairs and that He doesn't need any advice from me. With God in
charge, I believe everything will work out for the best in the end. So what is there to worry about.
-- Hen Love is the wisdom of the fool and the folly of the wise.
-- Samuel Johnson Health "If you want to make enemies, try to change something." (Woodrow Wilson, 28th US president, 1856-1924) In a hierarchy, every employee tends to rise to his level of incompetence. Therefore:
? In time, every post tends to be occupied by an employee who is incompetent to carry out its
duties.
? Work "Twelve magicians and two carnies have been shot dead doing the bullet catch. That's cool enough, but every night when we close our show with that trick and the loaded gun gets pointed in my face, it Health
"Those who dream by day are cognizant of many things which escape those who dream only by night." (Edger Allen Poe) Despite the high cost of living it remains a popular item.
-- Anonymous The planting of trees is the least self-centered of all that we can do. It is a purer act of faith than
the procreation of children.
-- Thornton Wilder He who laughs last thinks slowest.
-- Seen on a bumper sticker Never marry for money. Ye'll borrow it cheaper.
-- Scottish Proverb Health I don't know which is more discouraging, literature or chickens.
-- E. B. White Ah Mozart! He was happily married - but his wife wasn't. -- Borge "The monster a child knows best and is most concerned with [is] the monster he feels or fears himself to be. " (Bruno Bettelheim, child psychologist) Health
"O' What may man within him hide, though angel on the outward side!" (William Shakespeare) No one really listens to anyone else, and if you try it for a while you'll see why.
-- Mignon McLaughlin It is not necessary to understand things in order to argue about them.
-- Pierre Augustin de Beaumarchais I've been trying desperately to save my marriage for the last 35 years. Grove giveth and Gates taketh away.
- Bob Metcalfe (inventor of Ethernet) on the trend of hardware speedups not being able to keep
up with software demands Health The love we give away is the only love we keep.
-- Elbert Hubbard "I am interested in anything about revolt, disorder , chaos--especially activity that seems to have no meaning. It seems to me to be the road toward freedom ... Rather than starting inside, I start ou It is wrong to think that love comes from long companionship and persevering courtship. Love is
the offspring of spiritual affinity and unless that affinity is created in a moment, it will not be
cr Health
Love means to love that which is unlovable; or it is no virtue at all.
-- G. K. Chesterton Like a prune, you are not getting any better looking, but you are getting sweeter.
-- N. D. Stice Seeing a murder on television can help work off one's antagonisms. And if you haven't any
antagonisms, the commercials will give you some.
-- Alfred Hitchcock Jealousy is the only vice that gives no pleasure.
-- Anonymous The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans is suffering from some form of
mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they're okay, then it's you.
-- Rita Mae Brown Health Technology is a way of organizing the universe so that man doesn't have to experience it.
-- Max Frisch When one is trying to do something beyond his known powers it is useless to seek the approval
of friends. Friends are at their best in moments of defeat.
-- Henry Miller "What sculpture is to a block of marble, education is to a human soul." (Joseph Addison) Health
"I knew I was an unwanted baby when I saw my bath toys were a toaster and a radio." (Joan Rivers) The imaginary friends I had as a kid dropped me because their friends thought I didn't exist.
-- Aaron Machado A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle.
-- Gloria Steinem It is the final proof of God's omnipotence that he need not exist in order to save us.
-- Peter De Vries Gentlemen, it is better to have died a small boy than to fumble this football.
-- John Heisman Health Bigamy is one way of avoiding the painful publicity of divorce and the expense of alimony.
-- Oliver Herford Peculiar travel suggestions are dancing lessons from God.
-- Kurt Vonnegut, Jr., Cat's Cradle Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by age eighteeen.
-- Albert Einstein Health
You can't shake hands with a clenched fist.
-- Indira Gandhi "The meeting of two personalites is like the contact of two chemical substances. If there is any reaction, both are transformed." (Carl Gustav Jung) "Don't walk in front of me; I may not follow. Don't walk behind me; I may not lead. Walk beside me and just be my friend." (Albert Camus) Love is an ocean of emotions entirely surrounded by expenses.
-- Lord Dewar A weed is no more than a flower in disguise.
-- James Lowell Health "Yes, I am a dreamer. For a dreamer is one who can find his way by moonlight, and see the dawn before the rest of the world." (Oscar Wilde) I prefer the wicked rather than the foolish. The wicked sometimes rest.
-- Alexandre Dumas pere Generations to come will find it difficult to believe that a man such as Gandhi ever walked the
face of this earth.
-- Albert Einstein Health
