"In order to attain the impossible, one must attempt the absurd." (Miguel de Cervantes Saavedra, 1547-1616) Reality is nothing but a collective hunch.
-- Lily Tomlin "God is Man's stupidest idea." (Marcel Duchamp, French Dadaist) Thomas Jefferson--still surv...
-- John Adams, dying words If the government wants people to respect the law, it should set a better example.
-- Anon. Religion If it were weren't for pickpockets, I'd have no sex life at all.
-- Rodney Dangerfield blah "Great things are not done by impulse, but by a series of small things brought together." (Vincent van Gogh) I was a pilot flying an airplane and it just so happened that where I was flying made what I was
doing spying.
-- Francis Gary Power, U-2 reconnaissance pilot held by the Soviets for spying, in an i Religion
The difference between literature and journalism is that journalism is unreadable and literature is
not read.
-- Oscar Wilde Whenever a husband and wife begin to discuss their marriage, they are giving evidence at an
inquest.
-- H. L. Mencken What I have to say is far more important than how long my eyelashes are.
-- Alanis Morissette, singer, 1995 I must follow the people. Am I not their leader?
-- Benjamin Disraeli Live out of your imagination, not your history.
-- Stephen Covey Religion Everything should be made as simple as possible, but not simpler.
-- Albert Einstein "Furious activity is no substitute for understanding." (H. H. Williams) If I have seen farther than others, it is because I was standing on the shoulders of giants.
-- Isaac Newton Religion
"I either want less corruption, or more chance to participate in it." (Ashleigh Brilliant) Art and science have their meeting point in method.
-- Edward Bulwer-Lytton And in the end it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years.
-- Abraham Lincoln When you gaze long into the abyss, the abyss also gazes into you.
- Friedrich Nietzsche Cricket is best described as organised loafing.
-- Anonymous British Radio Broadcaster, 1996 Religion "Death where is thy sting? Love, where is thy glory?" (William Shakespeare) We come to love not by finding a perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person
perfectly.
-- Anonymous May you be too good for the world and not good enough for your wife. Religion
Man's mind stretched to a new idea never goes back to its original dimensions.
-- Oliver Wendell Holmes We need the iron qualities that go with true manhood. We need the positive virtues of resolution,
of courage, of indomitable will, of power to do without shrinking the rough work that must always
be We must become the change we want to see.
-- Gandhi Question: Ted Kennedy: "Where was George?"
Answer: Dry, sober, and at home with his wife Don't marry for money; you can borrow it cheaper. Religion "It is easier to forgive an enemy than to forgive a friend." (William Blake) Fighting is essentially a masculine idea; a woman's weapon is her tongue.
-- Hermione Gingold Football incorporates the two worst elements of American society: violence punctuated by
committee meetings.
-- George F. Will, journalist, political commentator, 1994 Religion
"When a hundred men stand together, each of them loses his mind and gets another one." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) In answer to the question of why it happened, I offer the modest proposal that our Universe is
simply one of those things which happen from time to time.
-- Edward P. Tryon Once the realization is accepted that even between the closest human beings infinite distances
continue to exist, a wonderful living side by side can grow up, if they succeed in loving the
distance When we treat man as he is, we make him worse than he is; when we treat him as if he already
were what he potentially could be, we make him what he should be.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe I think of my wife and I think of Lot, and I think of the lucky break he got. Religion Self-reliance is the only road to true freedom, and being one's own person is its ultimate reward.
-- Patricia Sampson That men do not learn very much from the lessons of history is the most important of all the
lessons that history has to teach.
-- Aldous Huxley You must first have a lot of patience to learn to have patience.
-- Stanislaw J. Lec Religion
"The key to wisdom is knowing all the right questions." (John A. Simone Jr.) Now is the time for all good men to come to.
-- Walt Kelly "The devil's agents may be of flesh and blood, may they not?" (Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, The Hound of the Baskervilles) Sir, I would rather be right than be President.
-- Henry Clay, Speech, 1850, referring to the Compromise Measure Conceit causes more conversation than wit.
-- LaRouchefoucauld Religion "Like as the waves make towards the pebbl'd shore, so do our minutes, hasten to their end." (William Shakespeare) Is fuel efficiency really what we need most desperately? I say what we really need is a car that
can be shot when it breaks down.
-- Russell Baker To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance.
-- Oscar Wilde Religion
I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like
toxic waste.
-- David Bissonette I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain
and bought jewelry.
-- Rita Rudner The church is the great lost and found department.
-- Robert Short blah "The length of this document defends it well against the risk of its being read." (Sir Winston Churchill, 1874-1965) "Everything in my life has been determined by mistakes." (Gene Wilder) Religion If addiction is judged by how long a dumb animal will sit pressing a lever to get a 'fix' of
something, to its own detriment, then I would conclude that netnews is far more addictive than
cocaine.
A hippo does not have a sting in its tail, but a wise man would still rather be sat on by a bee.
-- Polish proverb Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt.
-- Abraham Lincoln Religion
The backbone of surprise is fusing speed with secrecy.
- Von Clausewitz Happiness, it is said, is seldom found by those who seek it, and never by those who seek it for
themselves.
-- F. Emerson Andrews Husband: a man who buys his football tickets four months in advance and waits until December 24 to do his Christmas shopping. Watching the debate this afternoon it was apparent they loved term limits in the House -- as
Brutus loved Caesar.
-- Bill Moyers The west wasn't won on salad.
-- ND Beef Council, billboard advertisement, 1990 Religion Organic chemistry is the chemistry of carbon compounds. Biochemistry is the study of carbon
compounds that crawl.
-- Mike Adams We need a president who's fluent in at least one language.
-- Buck Henry If a relationship is to evolve, it must go through a series of endings.
-- Lisa Moriyama Religion
Do not assume that she who seeks to comfort you now, lives untroubled among the simple and
quiet words that sometimes do you good. Her life may also have much sadness and difficulty, that
remains fa Every calling is great when greatly pursued.
-- Oliver Wendell Holmes A man must marry only a very pretty woman in case he should ever want some other man to take
her off his hands.
-- Sacha Guitry History will be kind to me for I intend to write it.
-- Winston Churchill "The happy people are failures because they are on such good terms with themselves they don't give a damn." (Agatha Christie) Religion "Dreams are the touchstones of our personality." (Henry David Thoreau) You are educated when you have the ability to listen to almost anything without losing your
temper or self-confidence.
-- Robert Frost My best friend is the one who brings out the best in me!
-- Henry Ford Religion
Under certain circumstances, profanity provides a relief denied even to prayer.
-- Mark Twain Too bad all the people who know how to run the country are busy driving cabs and cutting hair.
-- George Burns Having a family is like having a bowling alley installed in your brain.
-- Martin Mull All that is gold does not glitter. Not all those who wander are lost;
-- J.R.R. Tolkein University politics are vicious precisely because the stakes are so small.
-- Henry Kissinger Religion Whoever is not a misanthrope at forty can never have loved mankind.
-- Sebastian Roch Nicolas Chamfort "Those who dream by day are cognizant of many things which escape those who dream only by night." (Edger Allen Poe) A man must marry only a very pretty woman in case he should ever want some other man to take her off his hands. -- Guitry Religion
We look forward to the time when the power to love of will replace the love of power. Then will our
world know the blessings of peace.
-- William Gladstone When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her. -- Guitry "We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars." (Oscar Wilde) Did you ever notice when you blow in a dog's face he gets mad at you? But when you take him in
a car he sticks his head out the window.
-- Steve Bluestone Love is an attempt to change a piece of the dream-world into reality.
-- Theodor Reik Religion The Churches must learn humility as well as teach it.
-- George Bernard Shaw, St. Joan "If you're in a bad situation, don't worry it'll change. If you're in a good situation, don't worry it'll change." (John A. Simone Sr.) "Dreams are the touchstones of our personality." (Henry David Thoreau) Religion
