"If you hold a cat by the tail you learn things you cannot learn any other way." (Mark Twain) Imitation is the sincerest form of television.
-- Fred Allen I cannot teach anybody anything, I can only make them think.
-- Socrates Science without religion is lame, religion without science is blind.
-- Albert Einstein "Paper should be edible, nutritious. Inks used for printing or writing should have delicious flavors. Magazines or newspapers read at breakfast should be eaten for lunch. Instead of throwing one's mai Newspapers Integrity is what we do, what we say, and what we say we do.
--Don Galer Life is to be fortified by many friendships. To love and to be loved is the greatest happiness of
existence.
-- Sydney Smith "Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former." (Albert Einstein) Newspapers
Grad school is the snooze button on the clock-radio of life.
-- John Rogers, comedian (who holds a graduate degree in physics) The most wasted day of all is that in which we have not laughed.
-- Sebastian Roch Nicolas Chamfort Inanimate objects are classified scientifically into three categories-- those that don't work, those
that break down, and those that get lost.
-- Russell Baker "It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to open one's mouth and remove all doubt." (Abraham Lincoln, 1809-65) Ah Mozart! He was happily married - but his wife wasn't.
-- Victor Borge Newspapers Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
-- Groucho Marx Since Eve ate the apple, much depends on dinner.
-- Lord Byron The great man fights the elements in his time that hinder his own greatness, in other words his own freedom and sincerity." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Newspapers
All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusion is called a philosopher.
- Ambrose Bierce "If man could be crossed with the cat, it would improve man but deteriorate the cat." (Mark Twain) "Give me liberty or give me death." (Patrick Henry) "From the start, marriage was instituted for contemptible, practical reasons--an idea of men." (Catherine Deneuve) Our schools have been scientifically designed to prevent over-education from happening. [...] The
average American (should be) content with their humble role in life, because they're not tempted
to Newspapers A problem is a chance for you to do your best.
-- Buke Ellington Destiny is but a phrase of the weak human heart - the dark apology for every error. The strong
and virtuous admit no destiny. On earth conscience guides; in heaven God watches. And destiny
is but th Peculiar travel suggestions are dancing lessons from God.
-- Kurt Vonnegut, Jr., Cat's Cradle Newspapers
And in the end it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years.
-- Abraham Lincoln Don't worry about people stealing your ideas. If your ideas are any good, you'll have to ram them
down people's throats.
-- Howard Aiken Confidence is the feeling you have before you understand the situation.
--Anon. Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It's the transition that's troublesome.
- Isaac Asimov Diplomat: A man who can convince his wife she would look stout in a fur coat. Newspapers The instinct of nearly all societies is to lock up anybody who is truly free. First, society begins by
trying to beat you up. If this fails, they try to poison you. If this fails too, the finish by l "In the End, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends." (Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.) your daughters marry men of substance: gypsies with two bears. Newspapers
The man who does not read good books has no advantage over the man who cannot read them.
-- Mark Twain "No one lies so boldly as the man who is indignant." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Who controls the past controls the future. Who controls the present controls the past.
-- George Orwell "Most people don't realize that large pieces of coral, which have been painted brown and attached to the skull by common wood screws, can make a child look like a deer." (Jack Handey) They couldn't hit an elephant at this dist---
-- John B. Sedgwick, general, dying words, 1864 Newspapers "Not by wrath does one kill, but by laughter." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) "I have never met a man so ignorant that I couldn't learn something from him." (Galileo Galilei) If money is your hope for independence you will never have it. The only real security that a man
will have in this world is a reserve of knowledge, experience, and ability.
-- Henry Ford Newspapers
Love matches, so called, have illusion for their father and need for their mother.
-- Friedrich Nietzsche Icky icky icky icky fKANG zoop-boing n zowzyin...
-- The Knights who so recently said "Nee!", Monty Python, British comedy television show "Our lives are repetitious shams--every single day a simulacrum of the previous day. So for Man, he is out to pepper his daily activities with different things--he's fighting against boredom." (Matth "In the future everyone will be famous for fifteen minutes." (Andy Warhol) The great tragedy of science, the slaying of a beautiful theory by an ugly fact.
-- Thomas Henry Huxley Newspapers This world is a comedy for those who think and a tragedy for those who feel.
-- Horace Walpole Nothing shows a man's character more than what he laughs at.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe This is a test. It is only a test. Had it been an actual job, you would have received raises,
promotions, and other signs of appreciation.
-- Anonymous Newspapers
"Every Man and every Woman is a Star." (Aleister Crowley) We cease loving ourselves if no one loves us.
-- Mme de Staël "Eschew the ordinary, disdain the commonplace. If you have a single-minded need for something, let it be the unusual, the esoteric, the bizarre, the unexpected..." (Chuck Jones) Never express yourself more clearly than you are able to think.
-- Niels Bohr Reason can answer questions, but imagination has to ask them.
-- Ralph N. Gerard Newspapers Giving every man a vote has no more made men wise and free than Christianity has made them
good.
-- H.L. Mencken I support efforts to limit the terms of members of Congress, especially members of the House and
members of the Senate.
-- Dan Quayle, Former Vice-President There is no more lovely, friendly and charming relationship, communion or company than a good
marriage
-- Martin Luther Newspapers
"Be not afraid of greatness. Some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some have greatness thrust upon 'em." (William Shakespeare, Twelfth Night, II:5) It takes a great deal of history to produce a little literature.
-- Henry James You can close your eyes to reality, but not to memories.
-- Stanislaw J. Lem Most convicted felons are just people who were not taken to museums or Broadway musicals as
children.
-- Libby Gelman-Waxner "The reward of a thing well done is having done it." (Ralph Waldo Emerson) Newspapers Moderation is a fatal thing. Nothing succeeds like excess.
-- Oscar Wilde A woman may very well form a friendship with a man, but for this to endure, it must be assisted
by a little physical antipathy.
-- Friedrich Nietzsche "That's the true sign. If the lover has not yet achieved his prize, his eyes will follow the woman, while she appears indifferent. But once he's gained his goal, it's the woman's eyes that follow him, Newspapers
A man must marry only a very pretty woman in case he should ever want some other man to take
her off his hands.
-- Sacha Guitry Universities incline wits to sophistry and affectation.
-- Francis Bacon I skate to where the puck is going to be, not to where it has been.
-- Wayne Gretzky It is not enough to succeed. Others must fail.
-- Gore Vidal A man who marries a woman to educate her falls a victim to the same fallacy as the woman who
marries a man to reform him.
-- Elbert Hubbard Newspapers "Failure is not an option!" (Ed Harris, as Gene Kranz, Apollo 13) Diplomacy is the art of saying "Nice doggie" until you can find a rock.
-- Wynn Catlin, also attributed to Will Rogers The most terrible poverty is loneliness and the feeling of being unloved.
-- Mother Teresa Newspapers
I'm for abolishing and doing away with redundancy.
-- J. Curtis McKay, Wisconsin State Elections Board If addiction is judged by how long a dumb animal will sit pressing a lever to get a 'fix' of
something, to its own detriment, then I would conclude that netnews is far more addictive than
cocaine.
Between men and women there is no friendship possible. There is passion, enmity, worship, love,
but no friendship.
-- Oscar Wilde Before marraige a man will like awake all night thinking about something you said. After marriage
he will fall asleep before you have finished saying it.
-- Anon. It is best to learn as we go, not go as we have learned.
-- Leslie Jeanne Sahler Newspapers Hell is other people.
- Jean-Paul Sartre Use your own best judgment at all times.
-- The entire Nordstrom's Department Stores policy manual What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson Newspapers
"It wasn't until I started reading and found books they wouldn't let us read in school that I discovered you could be insane and happy and have a good life without being like everybody else." (John W If you talk to God, you are praying; if God talks to you, you have schizophrenia.
-- Thomas Szasz The Democrats are the party that says government will make you smarter, taller, richer, and
remove the crabgrass on your lawn. The Republicans are the party that says government doesn't
work and the Most convicted felons are just people who were not taken to museums or Broadway musicals as
children.
-- Libby Gelman-Waxner The tragedy of life is not that man loses, but that he almost wins.
-- Heywood Brown Newspapers "To err is human; to forgive, divine." (Alexander Pope) When women go wrong, men go right after them.
-- Mae West "Frank and explicit; that is the right line to take when you wish to conceal your own mind and to confuse the minds of others." (Benjamin Disraeli, Sybil) Newspapers
