The brain is a wonderful organ. It starts working the moment you get up in the morning, and does
not stop until you get into the office.
-- Robert Frost If your professor wrote it, it's as near to the truth as you ever need to get.
-- John Watson, University of Canterbury "The happy people are failures because they are on such good terms with themselves they don't give a damn." (Agatha Christie) "A dress makes no sense unless it inspires men to take it off of you." (Francois Sagan) For best results: wash in cold water separately, hang dry and iron with warm iron. For not so good
results: drag behind car through puddles, blow-dry on roofrack.
-- Laundry instructions on a shirt Funeral Services Glory is fleeting, but obscurity is forever.
-- Napoleon Bonaparte The lover knows much more about absolute good and universal beauty than any logician or
theologian, unless the latter, too, be lovers in disguise.
-- George Santayana Live your questions now, and perhaps even without knowing it, you will live along some distant
day into your answers.
-- Rainer Maria Rilke Funeral Services
I love children, especially when they cry, for then someone takes them away.
-- Nancy Mitford The best time to hold your tongue is the time you feel you must say something or bust.
-- Josh Billings "The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of the dream." (Eleanor Roosevelt) Statistics are like a bikini. What they reveal is suggestive, but what they conceal is vital.
-- Aaron Levenstein The power of accurate observation is commonly called cynicism by those who have not got it.
-- George Bernard Shaw Funeral Services If I were a girl, I'd despair. The supply of good women far exceeds that of the men who deserve
them.
-- Robert Graves Time is at once the most valuable and most perishable of all our possessions.
-- John Randolph The principle of give and take is the principle of diplomacy - give one and take ten.
-- Mark Twain Funeral Services
A teacher is one who makes himself progressively unnecessary.
-- Thomas Carruthers Children today are tyrants. They contradict their parent, gobble their food, and tyrannize their
teachers.
-- Socrates The most exciting phrase to hear in science, the one that heralds the most discoveries, is not
"Eureka!", but "That's funny..."
-- Isaac Asimov If you were plowing a field, which would you rather use? Two strong oxen or 1024 chickens?
- Seymour Cray (1925-1996), father of supercomputing "Genius without education is like silver in the mine." (Benjamin Franklin) Funeral Services All truth passes through three stages. First, it is ridiculed. Second, it is violently opposed. Third, it
is accepted as being self-evident.
- Arthur Schopenhauer The tragedy of life is not that man loses, but that he almost wins.
-- Heywood Brown Not to anticipate is already to moan.
-- Leonardo da Vinci Funeral Services
An eye for an eye only leads to more blindness.
-- Margaret Atwood Is fuel efficiency really what we need most desperately? I say what we really need is a car that
can be shot when it breaks down.
-- Russell Baker You can't say civilization isn't advancing: in every war they kill you in a new way.
-- Will Rogers After finding no qualified candidates for the position of principal, the school board is extremely
pleased to announce the appointment of David Steele to the post.
-- Philip Streifer, Superintendent Whoever is not a misanthrope at forty can never have loved mankind.
-- Sebastian Roch Nicolas Chamfort Funeral Services America's one of the finest countries anyone ever stole.
-- Bobcat Goldthwait The best way to get husbands to do something is to suggest that perhaps they are too old to do it.
-- Shirley MacLaine It is not good enough to have a good mind; the main thing is to use it well.
-- Rene Descartes Funeral Services
Never try to teach a pig to sing. It's a waste of your time and annoys the pig.
-- Anon. There is only one kind of love, but there are a thousand imitations.
-- François de La Rouchefoucauld The ability to quote is a serviceable substitute for wit.
-- W. Somerset Maugham Democracy means simply the bludgeoning of the people by the people for the people.
-- Oscar Wilde Everyone believes very easily whatever they fear or desire.
-- Jean de La Fontaine Funeral Services All women are born evil. Some just realize their potential later in life than others.
-- Chad A. Gamble, Escape, short story The coziness between church and state is good for the state and bad for the church.
-- G. K. Chesterton I have come to the conclusion never again to think of marrying, and for this reason, I can never
be satisfied with anyone who would be blockhead enough to have me.
-- Abraham Lincoln, in a letter to Funeral Services
It is the customary fate of new truths to begin as heresies and to end as superstitions.
-- Aldous Huxley The difference between marriage and death? Dead people are free. I like two kinds of men: domestic and foreign.
-- Mae West Despite the high cost of living it remains a popular item.
-- Anonymous "Everybody knows that if you are too careful, you become so occupied in being careful that you are sure to stumble over something." (Gertrude Stein) Funeral Services "Contrariwise," continued Tweedledee, "if it was so, it might be, and if it were so, it would be; but
as it isn't, it ain't. That's logic!"
-- Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland Love is the dawn of marriage, and marriage is the sunset of love.
-- French saying If addiction is judged by how long a dumb animal will sit pressing a lever to get a 'fix' of
something, to its own detriment, then I would conclude that netnews is far more addictive than
cocaine.
Funeral Services
Criticism is prejudice made plausible.
- Henry Louis Mencken I never found the companion that was so companionable as solitude. we are for the most part
more lonely when we go abroad among men than when we stay in our chambers.
-- Thoreau "True friends, like diamonds, are precious and rare. False friends, like autumn leaves, are found everywhere." (Anonymous) The one thing that doesn't abide by majority rule is a person's conscience.
-- Harper Lee The world has achieved brilliance without conscience. Ours is a world of nuclear giants and
ethical infants.
-- General Omar Bradley Funeral Services Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go.
-- T.S. Eliot Free will is a golden thread running through the frozen matrix of fixed events.
-- Robert A. Heinlein _The Rolling Stones_ "Jesus died too soon. If he had lived to my age he would have repudiated his doctrine." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Funeral Services
As for courage and will - we cannot measure how much of each lies within us, we can only trust
there will be sufficient to carry through trials which may lie ahead.
-- Andre Norton Character is what you are in the dark.
-- Dwight L. Moody "Bread feeds the body, indeed, but flowers feed also the soul." (The Prophet Mohammad) You can not apply mathematics as long as words still becloud reality.
-- Hermann Weyl Marriage is love. Love is blind. Therefore, marriage is an institution for the blind. Funeral Services I believe in equality for everyone, except reporters and photographers.
-- Gandhi It is better to be feared than loved, if you cannot be both.
-- Niccolo Machiavelli, The Prince then the world 's mine oyster
-- William Shakespeare, The Merry Wives of Windsor Funeral Services
"If you want a thing done well, do it yourself." (Napoleon Bonaparte) The work of internal government has become the task of controlling the thousands of fifth-rate
men.
-- Henry B. Adams Love looks through a telescope; envy, through a microscope.
-- Josh Billings Since Eve ate the apple, much depends on dinner.
-- Lord Byron "The great aim of education is not knowledge but action." (Herbert Spencer) Funeral Services The greatest discovery of my generation is that human beings can alter their lives by altering their
attitudes of mind.
-- William James You can observe a lot by watching.
-- Yogi Berra Education is a progressive discovery of our own ignorance.
- Will Durant Funeral Services
A man who has never made a woman angry is a failure in life.
-- Christopher Morley "When once you have tasted flight you will always walk the earth with your eyes turned skyward: for there you have been and there you will always be." (Henry Van Dyke) "If there is something to pardon in everything, there is also something to condemn." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche, The Will to Power, 1888) I still believe in liberalism today as much as I ever did, but, oh, there was a happy time when I
believed in liberals...
-- G. K. Chesterton "Courage is found in unlikely places." (John Ronald Reuel Tolkien) Funeral Services We have drugs to make women speak, but none to keep them silent.
-- Anatole France The reason why worry kills more people than work is that more people worry than work.
-- ROBERT FROST I do not see the EEC as a great love affair. It is more like nine desperate middle-ages couples with failing marriages meeting at a Brussels hotel for a group grope. -- Tynan Funeral Services
Each of us has a spark of life inside us, and our highest endeavor ought to be to set off that spark
in one another.
-- Kenny Ausubel "Humanity has won its battle. Liberty now has a country." (Marquis de Lafayette) Don't let it end like this. Tell them I said something.
-- Pancho Villa, dying words It makes no difference who you vote for - the two parties are really one party representing four
percent of the people.
-- Gore Vidal Idealism increases in direct proportion to one's distance from the problem.
-- John Galsworthy Funeral Services No man is good enough to govern another man without that other's consent.
-- Abraham Lincoln Under certain circumstances, profanity provides a relief denied even to prayer.
-- Mark Twain A good marriage is like a casserole, only those responsible for it really know what goes in it.
-- Anonymous Funeral Services
