A man in the house is worth two in the street.
-- Mae West "No person was ever honored for what he received. Honor has been the reward for what he gave." (Calvin Coolidge) "Every act of violence increases the recruitment of terrorists. Iraq has been turned into a base of terror." (Noam Chomsky, from The Toronto Star, March 23, 2004) Every man knows his follies and often they are the most interesting thing he has got.
-- Josh Billings The Democrats are the party that says government will make you smarter, taller, richer, and
remove the crabgrass on your lawn. The Republicans are the party that says government doesn't
work and the Softball It takes a great deal of history to produce a little literature.
-- Henry James Women see better than men. Men see lazily, if they do not expect to act. Women see quite
without any wish to act.
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson Old soldiers never die, they just fade away.
-- General Douglas MacArthur Softball
Famous remarks are very seldom quoted correctly.
-- Simeon Strunsky I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years.
-- Sam Kinison Sign in a marriage counselor's window: "Out to lunch - Think it over." Mary had a little lamb and the doctor fainted.
-- Anonymous You can complain because roses have thorns, or you can rejoice because thorns have roses.
-- Ziggy, character in comic strip by Tom Wilson Softball Giving every man a vote has no more made men wise and free than Christianity has made them
good.
-- H.L. Mencken "A man who tells lies, like me, merely hides the truth. But a man who tells half-lies has forgotten where he put it." (Claude Rains, as Mr. Dryden, Lawrence of Arabia, 1962) "The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore, all progress depends on the unreasonable man." (George Bernard Shaw) Softball
Perhaps the most valuable result of all education is the ability to make yourself do the thing you
have to do, when it ought to be done, whether you like it or not.
-- Aldous Huxley You can get more with a kind word and a gun than you can with a kind word alone.
-- Al Capone I believe God is managing affairs and that He doesn't need any advice from me. With God in
charge, I believe everything will work out for the best in the end. So what is there to worry about.
-- Hen I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial.
- Irvin S. Cobb As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he.
-- Proverbs 23:7 Softball "The road of excess leads to the palace of wisdom." (William Blake) There is only one kind of love, but there are a thousand imitations.
-- François de La Rouchefoucauld No one can earn a million dollars honestly.
- William Jennings Bryan Softball
LOVE, n. A temporary insanity curable by marriage or by removal of the patient from the
influences under which he incurred the disorder... It is sometimes fatal, but more frequently to the
physician Statistics are like a bikini. What they reveal is suggestive, but what they conceal is vital.
-- Aaron Levenstein Few things are harder to put up with than a good example.
- Mark Twain I'm living so far beyond my income that we may almost be said to be living apart.
- e e cummings I think, therefore I'm single.
-- Female philosopher Softball A true gentleman is one who is never unintentionally rude.
-- Oscar Wilde If your daily life seems poor, do not blame it; blame yourself, tell yourself that you are not a poet
enough to call forth its riches; for to the creator there is no poverty and no poor indifferent p blah "Some of the worlds greatest feats were accomplished by people not smart enough to know they were impossible. unattributed" (Anonymous) Softball
If you talk to God, you are praying; if God talks to you, you have schizophrenia.
-- Thomas Szasz "A woman may very well form a friendship with a man, but for this to endure, it must be assisted by a little physical antipathy." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Sir, I would rather be right than be President.
-- Henry Clay, Speech, 1850, referring to the Compromise Measure Love is only the game that is not called on account of darkness.
-- M. Hirschfield "I do not suppose I shall be remembered for anything. But I don't think about my work in those terms. It is just as vulgar to work for the sake of posterity as to work for the sake of money." (George Softball The world has achieved brilliance without conscience. Ours is a world of nuclear giants and
ethical infants.
-- General Omar Bradley "All women love the men they fear. All women kiss the hand that rules them." (Lionel Atwill) "If I work toward an end, meantime I am confined to a process. The rainbow is more beautiful than the pot at the end of it, because the rainbow is now. And the pot never turns out to be quite what I e Softball
Ask her to wait a moment - I am almost done.
-- Carl Friedrich Gauss, when informed that his wife was dying Hey, you can't fight in here! This is the war room!
-- Dr. Strangelove Does anal retentive have a hyphen?
-- Seen on a t-shirt Education is a progressive discovery of our own ignorance.
- Will Durant I'm worried that the universe will soon need replacing. It's not holding a charge.
-- Edward Chilton Softball "May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house." (George Carlin) Whatever you are, be a good one.
-- Abraham Lincoln "I love Los Angeles. I love Hollywood. They're beautiful. Everybody's plastic, but I love plastic. I want to be plastic." (Andy Warhol, Holy Terror: Andy Warhol Close Up) Softball
"Things do not change, we change." (Henry David Thoreau) The right to swing my fist ends where the other man's nose begins.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes "I think people resist freedom because they're afraid of the unknown. But it's ironic....That unknown was once very well known. It's where are souls belong....The only solution is to confront them--co "Dying is the most embarrassing thing that can ever happen to you, because someone's got to take care of all your details." (Andy Warhol, America, 1985) Nothing is really work unless you would rather be doing something else.
-- James Matthew Barrie Softball That is the best -- to laugh with someone because you think the same things are funny.
-- Gloria Vanderbilt You can take all the sincerity in Hollywood, place it in the navel of a firefly and still have room
enough for three caraway seeds and a producer's heart.
-- Fred Allen "Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something." (Plato, 427 BC-348) Softball
He who laughs, lasts.
-- Mary Pettibone Poole "I do not agree with what you have to say, but I'll defend to the death your right to say it." (Francois Marie Arouet Voltaire, 1694-1778) Usenet is like Tetris for people who still remember how to read.
-- Button from the Computer Museum, Boston, MA If absolute power corrupts absolutely, does absolute powerlessness make you pure?
-- Harry Shearer "The proper office of a friend is to side with you when you are wrong. Nearly anybody will side with you when you are right." (Mark Twain) Softball The only way to entertain some folks is to listen to them.
-- Kin Hubbard The graveyards are full of indispensable men.
- Charles de Gaulle Being a woman is of special interest only to aspiring male transsexuals. To actual women it is
merely a good excuse not to play football.
-- Fran Lebowitz Softball
Winning is a habit. Unfortunately, so is losing.
-- Vince Lombardi "A new baby is like the beginning of all things--wonder, hope, a dream of possibilities." (Eda J. Le Shan) I do not believe in an afterlife, although I am bringing a change of underwear.
-- Woody Allen "I was a total loner, not by self-design. I just didn't know what the hell to say to people. I was so shy. I used to stammer and lisp and dribble at the mouth." (Sir Anthony Hopkins, on his youth) Never look at the trombones. You'll only encourage them.
-- Richard Strauss, on conducting Softball Live out of your imagination, not your history.
-- Stephen Covey Life is like music; it must be composed by ear, feeling, and instinct, not by rule.
-- Samuel Butler "All women become like their mothers. That is their tragedy. No man does. That's his." (Oscar Wilde, The Importance of Being Earnest) Softball
"People have to talk about something just to keep their voice boxes in working order so they'll have good voice boxes in case there's ever anything really meaningful to say." (Kurt Vonnegut) We are the echo of the future.
-- W. S. Merwin Washington is a city of Southern efficiency and Northern charm.
-- John F. Kennedy Asking an incumbent member of Congress to vote for term limits is a bit like asking a chicken to
vote for Colonel Sanders.
-- Bob Inglis, 1995 Your goals, minus your doubts, equal your reality.
-- Ralph Marston Softball The backbone of surprise is fusing speed with secrecy.
- Von Clausewitz "Politics is my hobby. Smut is my vocation." (Larry Flynt) That's the nature of research--you don't know what in hell you're doing.
-- 'Doc' Edgerton Softball
What if it was cats who invented technology... would they have tv shows starring rubber sqeak
toys?
-- Douglas Coupland Whether you think that you can, or that you can't, you are usually right.
-- Henry Ford Marriage is the one subject on which all women agree and all men disagree.
-- Oscar Wilde The fantasy which serves as a support for the figure of the Stalinist Communist is therefore
exactly the same as the fantasy which is at work in the Tom and Jerry cartoons.
-- Slavoj Zizek When I have a kid, I wanna put him in one of those strollers for twins, then run around the mall
looking frantic.
-- Steven Wright Softball Do not fear to be eccentric in opinion, for every opinion now accepted was once eccentric.
-- Bertrand Russell People think we make $3 million and $4 million a year. They don't realize that most of us only
make $500,000.
-- Pete Incaviglia, baseball player, 1990 Great Spirit, help me never to judge another until I have walked in his moccasins.
-- Sioux Indian Prayer Softball
