"Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are a good person is like expecting a bull not to attack you because you are a vegetarian." (Dennis Wholey) The great advantage of being in a rut is that when one is in a rut, one knows exactly where one
is.
-- Arnold Bennett Women are like tea bags; put them in hot water and they get stronger.
-- Eleanor Roosevelt For best results: wash in cold water separately, hang dry and iron with warm iron. For not so good
results: drag behind car through puddles, blow-dry on roofrack.
-- Laundry instructions on a shirt If ever two were one, then surely we.
If ever man were loved by wife, then thee.
-- Anne Bradstreet Pre-School blah "This is the hardest of all: to close the open hand out of love, and keep modest as a giver." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Some men are born with cold feet; some acquire cold feet; and some have cold feet thrust upon
them.
-- Anonymous The way to love anything is to realize that it might be lost.
-- G. K. Chesterton Pre-School
If someone offers you a breath mint, accept it.
-- H. Jackson Brown, Jr., Life's Little Treasure Book, on wisdom All over Washington today, the politicians and the power brokers are happy. In fact, if you listen
closely, you can hear the sound of champagne corks popping.
-- Paul Jacob, Term Limits Executive Di The best theology would need no advocates; it would prove itself.
-- Karl Barth Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the country.
-- Marion Barry, Mayor, Washington, D.C. The covers of this book are too far apart.
-- Ambrose Bierce Pre-School Thomas Jefferson--still surv...
-- John Adams, dying words My theology, briefly, is that the universe was dictated but not signed.
-- Christopher Morley I sometimes think that God, in creating man, overestimated His ability.
-- Oscar Wilde Pre-School
The better part of valor is discretion.
-- William Shakespeare 1564-1616 from King Henry the Fourth, Part I If people turn to look at you on the street, you are not well dressed.
-- Beau Brummel The man with the best job in the country is the Vice President. All he has to do is get up every
morning and say, "How's the President?"
-- Will Rogers In the past decade or so, the women's magazines have taken to running home-handyperson
articles suggesting that women can learn to fix things just as well as men. These articles are
apparently based "Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines." (John Benfield) Pre-School The opposite of a correct statement is a false statement. But the opposite of a profound truth may
well be another profound truth.
-- Niels Bohr If Satan ever loses his hair, there'll be hell toupee.
-- Anonymous I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years.
-- Sam Kinison Pre-School
If it were weren't for pickpockets, I'd have no sex life at all.
-- Rodney Dangerfield I figure you have the same chance of winning the lottery whether you play or not.
-- Fran Lebowitz Don't be afraid your life will end; be afraid that it will never begin.
-- Grace Hansen Seek the lofty by reading, hearing and seeing great work at some moment every day.
-- Thornton Wilder Does anal retentive have a hyphen?
-- Seen on a t-shirt Pre-School My theology, briefly, is that the universe was dictated but not signed.
-- Christopher Morley "A common mistake that people make when trying to design something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools." (Douglas Adams) If you cannot be the master of your language, you must be its slave. If you cannot examine your
thoughts, you have no choice but to think them, however silly they may be.
-- Richard Mitchell, from Pre-School
You can't learn too soon that the most useful thing about a principle is that it can always be
sacrificed to expediency.
-- W. Somerset Maugham "The great aim of education is not knowledge but action." (Herbert Spencer) If men knew all that women think, they'd be twenty times more daring.
-- Alphonse Karr If someone offers you a breath mint, accept it.
-- H. Jackson Brown, Jr., Life's Little Treasure Book, on wisdom There is no realizable power that man cannot, in time, fashion the tools to attain, nor any power
so secure that the naked ape will not abuse it. So it is written in the genetic cards - only physics Pre-School I still live.
-- Daniel Webster, dying words Before God we are all equally wise - and equally foolish.
-- Albert Einstein Every flower must grow through dirt.
-- Anonymous Pre-School
Doctors are the same as lawyers; the only difference is that lawyers merely rob you, whereas
doctors rob you and kill you too.
-- Anton Chekhov Journalism consists largely in saying "Lord Jones died" to people who never knew Lord Jones
was alive.
-- G. K. Chesterton A man can't get rich if he takes proper care of his family.
-- Navaho saying Love is blind and marriage is the institution for the blind.
-- James Graham The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existing. One
cannot help but be in awe when he contemplates the mysteries of eternity, of life, of the
marvelous str Pre-School There are three types of people in this world: Those who can count, and those who can't.
-- Seen on a bumper sticker "Think where mans glory most begins and ends, and say my glory was I had such friends." (William Butler Yeats) Having once decided to achieve a certain task, achieve it at all costs of tedium and distaste. The
gain in self-confidence of having accomplished a tiresome labor is immense.
-- Thomas Arnold Bennet Pre-School
Even a band of angels can turn ugly and start looting if enough angels are unemployed and
hanging around the Pearly Gates convinced that all the succubi own all the liquor stores in
Heaven.
-- P. J I do not consider it an insult, but rather a compliment to be called an agnostic. I do not pretend to
know where many ignorant men are sure -- that is all that agnosticism means.
- Clarence Darrow, For of all sad words of tongue or pen,
The saddest are these: "It might have been!"
-- John Greenleaf Whittier It is better to be hated for what you are than to be loved for what you are not.
-- Andre Gide He who laughs last has not yet heard the bad news.
-- Bertolt Brecht Pre-School Love is an ocean of emotions entirely surrounded by expenses.
-- Lord Dewar Life isn't a matter of milestones, but of moments.
-- Rose Kennedy A great deal of talent is lost to the world for want of a little courage. Every day sends to their
graves obscure men whom timidity prevented from making a first effort.
-- Sydney Smith Pre-School
Dishonor will not trouble me, once I am dead.
-- Euripides In answer to the question of why it happened, I offer the modest proposal that our Universe is
simply one of those things which happen from time to time.
-- Edward P. Tryon "It is a curious thing that God learned Greek when he wished to turn author--and that he did not learn it better." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) I would have made a good Pope.
-- Richard Nixon, U.S. President The only weapon that becomes sharper with constant use is the tongue.
-- Anonymous Pre-School The course of true love never did run smooth.
-- William Shakespeare Asking an incumbent member of Congress to vote for term limits is a bit like asking a chicken to
vote for Colonel Sanders.
-- Bob Inglis, 1995 Human history becomes more and more a race between education and catastrophe.
- H. G. Wells Pre-School
Tact is the ability to describe others as they see themselves.
-- Abraham Lincoln Everyone is a genius at least once a year; a real genius has his original ideas closer together.
- Georg Lichtenberg I don't know as much as God, but I know more than He did at my age.
-- Henry Kissinger Life is a series of experiences, each one of which makes us bigger, even though it is hard to
realize this. For the world was built to develop character, and we must learn that the setbacks and
grie Only positive consequences encourage good future performances.
-- Kenneth H. Blanchard Pre-School Live TV died in the late 1950s, electronic bulletin boards came along in the mid-1980s, meaning
there was about a 25-year gap when it was difficult to put your foot in your mouth and have
people all "The concerned investment banker is the one who blows the horn on his Mercedes as he drives through a red light." (Anonymous) He who knows only his own side of the case, knows little of that.
-- John Stuart Mill Pre-School
"Hold a true friend with both your hands." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) No matter who you vote for, the Government always gets in.
-- Anon. In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: It goes on.
-- Robert Frost I take my wife everywhere I go. She always finds her way back.
-- Henny Youngman He would make a lovely corpse.
- Charles Dickens Pre-School "Man looks in the abyss, there's nothing staring back at him. At that moment, man finds his character. And that is what keeps him out of the abyss." (Hal Holbrook, Wallstreet) The Bible tells us to love our neighbors, and also to love our enemies; probably because
generally they are the same people.
-- G. K. Chesterton The longer I live the more I see that I am never wrong about anything, and that all the pains that I
have so humbly taken to verify my notions have only wasted my time.
-- George Bernard Shaw Pre-School
"Boredom is a vital problem for the moralist, since at least half the sins of mankind are caused by the fear of it." (Bertrand Arthur William Russell, 1872-1970) I've always thought that underpopulated countries in Africa are vastly underpolluted.
-- Lawrence Summers, chief economist of the World Bank, explaining why we should export toxic
wastes to Third Wo Considering the flames and intolerance, shouldn't USENET be spelled ABUSENET?
-- Michael Meissner History is the version of past events that people have decided to agree upon.
-- Napoleon Bonaparte "Nietzsche was stupid and abnormal." (Leo Tolstoy, 1828-1910) Pre-School Look not mournfully into the Past. It comes not back again. Wisely improve the Present. It is
thine. Go forth to meet the shadowy Future, without fear, and with a manly heart.
-- Henry Wadsworth Lo Opportunity may knock only once, but temptation leans on the doorbell.
-- Anonymous I live in that solitude which is painful in youth, but delicious in the years of maturity.
-- Albert Einstein Pre-School
