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Friends applaud, the Comedy is over.
-- Ludwig von Beethoven, dying words The only weapon that becomes sharper with constant use is the tongue.
-- Anonymous Asking politicians to vote themselves out of power is like asking rabbits not to multiply, it ain't
natural.
-- Bob Beckel, on term limits, CBS This Morning, 3/30/95 "No drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of society. If we're looking for the source of our troubles, we shouldn't test people for drugs, we should test them for stupidity, ignorance, g "I've decided something: Commercial things really do stink. As soon as it becomes commercial for a mass market it really stinks." (Andy Warhol, The Andy Warhol Diaries, 1989) Recreation and Sports But at my back I always hear Time's winged chariot hurrying near.
- Andrew Marvell There's many a bestseller that could have been prevented by a good teacher.
-- Flannery O'Connor Marriage: the only sport in which the trapped animal has to buy the license. Recreation and Sports
God gave men both a penis and a brain, but unfortunately not enough blood supply to run both at
the same time.
- Robin Williams, commenting on the Clinton/Lewinsky affair "It is the nature of a man as he grows older, a small bridge in time, to protest against change, particularly change for the better." (John Steinbeck, Travels With Charley) Did you hear about the scientist whose wife had twins? He baptized one and kept the other as a control. "Once spirit was God, then it became man, and now it is even becoming mob." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) "Do not go gentle into that good night. Old age should burn and rave at close of day. Rage, rage against the dying of the light." (Dylan Thomas) Recreation and Sports "May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house." (George Carlin) Great Spirit, help me never to judge another until I have walked in his moccasins.
-- Sioux Indian Prayer Women want mediocre men, and men are working hard to become as mediocre as possible.
-- Margaret Mead Recreation and Sports
"As long as people will accept crap, it will be financially profitable to dispense it." (Dick Cavett) "Pay no attention to what the critics say; there has never been set up a statue in honor of a critic." (Jean Sibelius) Democracy is a device that insures we shall be governed no better than we deserve.
-- George Bernard Shaw "College professors are the people who can't hack it in the real world." (William Thomas) No, that is the great fallacy; the wisdom of old men. They do not grow wise. They grow careful." (Ernest Hemingway, A Farewell To Arms) Recreation and Sports If you talk to God, you are praying; if God talks to you, you have schizophrenia.
-- Thomas Szasz Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.
-- George Bernard Shaw "Over grown military establishments are under any form of government inauspicious to liberty, and are to be regarded as particularly hostile to republican liberty." (George Washington) Recreation and Sports
The world has achieved brilliance without conscience. Ours is a world of nuclear giants and
ethical infants.
-- General Omar Bradley If I had only known, I would have been a locksmith.
-- Albert Einstein Man does not live by words alone, despite the fact that he sometimes has to eat them.
-- Adlai Stevenson The right to swing my fist ends where the other man's nose begins.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes Whatever you are, be a good one.
-- Abraham Lincoln Recreation and Sports "The easiest kind of relationship is with ten thousand people, the hardest is with one." (Joan Baez) "Life does not cease to be funny when people die any more than it ceases to be serious when people laugh." (George Bernard Shaw) He who laughs last is generally the last to get the joke.
-- Terry Cohen Recreation and Sports
The nice thing about egotists is that they don't talk about other people.
- Lucille S. Harper He who conquers himself is the mightiest warrior.
-- Confucius Happiness, it is said, is seldom found by those who seek it, and never by those who seek it for
themselves.
-- F. Emerson Andrews A woman may very well form a friendship with a man, but for this to endure, it must be assisted
by a little physical antipathy.
-- Friedrich Nietzsche Don't be so humble - you are not that great.
- Golda Meir (1898-1978) to a visiting diplomat Recreation and Sports He who awaits much can expect little.
-- Gabriel Garcia Marquez Forgiveness does not change the past, but it does enlarge the future.
-- Paul Boese A thing is not necessarily true because badly uttered, nor false because spoken magnificently.
-- St. Augustine Recreation and Sports
"All our best men are laughed at in this nightmare land." (Jack Keroac) For best results: wash in cold water separately, hang dry and iron with warm iron. For not so good
results: drag behind car through puddles, blow-dry on roofrack.
-- Laundry instructions on a shirt The significant problems we face cannot be solved at the same level of thinking we were at when
we created them.
- Albert Einstein The perfect love affair is one which is conducted entirely by post.
-- George Bernard Shaw I have a great diet. You're allowed to eat anything you want, but you must eat it with naked fat
people.
-- Ed Bluestone Recreation and Sports "I have made this letter longer than usual because I lack the time to make it shorter." (Blaise Pascal) I tried a mail order bride, once, but she was damaged in the mail, and I had to return the unused part for my full refund. And life is what we make it. Always has been, always will be.
-- Grandma Moses Recreation and Sports
Heav'n hath no rage like love to hatred turn'd, Nor Hell a fury, like a woman scorn'd.
-- William Congreve The reason why worry kills more people than work is that more people worry than work.
-- ROBERT FROST "Love is always a stranger in the house of avarice." (Andreas Capellanus) Is fuel efficiency really what we need most desperately? I say what we really need is a car that
can be shot when it breaks down.
-- Russell Baker I don't know as much as God, but I know more than He did at my age.
-- Henry Kissinger Recreation and Sports "The only things worth learning are the things you learn after you know it all." (Harry S. Truman) Not much meat on her, but what's there is choice.
-- Spencer Tracy, about Katharine Hepburn Don't look back -- something might be gaining on you.
-- Satchel Paige Recreation and Sports
Good teaching is one-fourth preparation and three-fourths theater.
- Gail Godwin I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like
toxic waste.
-- David Bissonette If ever I get married again it would have to be under an anaesthetic.
-- Marie Tonkin There are two means of refuge from the misery of life - music and cats.
-- Albert Schweitzer If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?
-- Abraham Lincoln Recreation and Sports I'm all in favor of keeping dangerous weapons out of the hands of fools. Let's start with
typewriters.
- Frank Lloyd Wright The only one of your children who does not grow up and move away is your husband. Under capitalism man exploits man; under socialism the reverse is true.
-- Polish proverb Recreation and Sports
Such is life.
-- Ned Kelly, Last words, before being hung at Old Melbourne Gaol Prejudice is the child of ignorance.
-- William Hazlitt Things are more like they are now than they ever were before.
-- Dwight D. Eisenhower, U.S. President The most terrible poverty is loneliness and the feeling of being unloved.
-- Mother Teresa There are those who look at things the way they are, and ask why... I dream of things that never
were, and ask why not?
-- Robert Francis Kennedy Recreation and Sports There's no problem so awful that you can't add some guilt to it and make it even worse!
-- Calvin We have been friends together in sunshine and in shade.
-- Caroline Norton Love cures people, both the ones who give it and the ones who receive it.
-- Dr. Karl Menninger Recreation and Sports
Marriages are made in heaven and consummated on Earth. -- John Lyly I have often regretted my speech, never my silence.
-- Anonymous University politics are vicious precisely because the stakes are so small.
-- Henry Kissinger "The intellect is always fooled by the heart." (François VI Duke (duc) de La Rochefoucauld, 1616-80) Remember your dreams.
-- Maryanne Radmacher-Herhey Recreation and Sports The way to love anything is to realize that it might be lost.
-- G. K. Chesterton The IRS spends God knows how much of your tax money on these toll-free information hot lines
staffed by IRS employees, whose idea of a dynamite tax tip is that you should print neatly. If you
ask th "Man was born free and everywhere he is in chains." (Jean-Jacques Rousseau, French philosopher, The Social Contract) Recreation and Sports
Trust, but verify.
-- Ronald Reagan Love is blind and marriage is the institution for the blind.
-- James Graham But at my back I always hear Time's winged chariot hurrying near.
- Andrew Marvell My good intentions are completely lethal.
-- Margaret Atwood I love deadlines. I especially like the whooshing sound they make as they go flying by.
-- Douglas Adams Recreation and Sports Most people are more comfortable with old problems than with new solutions.
-- Anonymous For a male and female to live continuously together is...biologically speaking, an extremely
unnatural condition.
-- Robert Briffault You can always amend a big plan, but you can never expand a little one. I don't believe in little
plans. I believe in plans big enough to meet a situation which we can't possibly foresee now.
-- Ha Recreation and Sports
