You have to walk carefully in the beginning of love; the running across fields into your lover's
arms can only come later when you're sure they won't laugh if you trip.
-- Jonathan Carroll, Outside "Whenever a friend succeeds, a little something in me dies." (Gore Vidal) "A wise man among the ignorant is as a beautiful girl in the company of blind men." (Saadi) "I don't believe people die. They just go uptown. To Bloomingdales. They just take longer to get back." (Andy Warhol) Books, like friends, should be few and well chosen.
-- Samuel Paterson P 'Tis better to have loved and lost
Than never to have loved at all.
-- Alfred, Lord Tennyson, In Memoriam, 1850, line 27, stanza 4 Sex is God's joke on human beings.
-- Bette Davis "I would rather be exposed to the inconveniences attending too much liberty than to those attending too small a degree of it." (Thomas Jefferson, to Archibald Stuart, 1791) P
A true gentleman is one who is never unintentionally rude.
-- Oscar Wilde "A girl can wait for the right man to come along, but in the meantime that still doesn't mean she can't have a wonderful time with all the wrong ones." (Cher) For best results: wash in cold water separately, hang dry and iron with warm iron. For not so good
results: drag behind car through puddles, blow-dry on roofrack.
-- Laundry instructions on a shirt The opposite of a correct statement is a false statement. But the opposite of a profound truth may
well be another profound truth.
-- Niels Bohr Creativity is the sudden cessation of stupidity.
-- Edward H. Land P "Every great institution is the lengthened shadow of a single man. His character determines the character of the organization." (Ralph Waldo Emerson) There is nothing nobler or more admirable than when two people who see eye to eye keep house
as man and wife, confounding their enemies and delighting their friends.
-- Homer, Odyssey, ninth century Never practice two vices at once.
-- Tallulah Bankhead P
"I was born lost and take no pleasure in being found..." (John Steinbeck, Travels With Charley) Lawyers are... operators of the toll bridge which anyone in search of justice must pass.
-- Jane Bryant Quinn A man can do what he wants, but not want what he wants.
-- Arthur Schoperhauer A conference is a gathering of important people who singly can do nothing, but together can
decide that nothing can be done.
-- Fred Allen When you have to kill a man, it costs nothing to be polite.
- Sir Winston Churchill P If addiction is judged by how long a dumb animal will sit pressing a lever to get a 'fix' of
something, to its own detriment, then I would conclude that netnews is far more addictive than
cocaine.
Boredom is the feeling that everything is a waste of time; serenity, that nothing is.
-- Thomas Szasz I have lost friends, some by death, others through sheer inability to cross the street.
-- Virginia Woolf P
I love children, especially when they cry, for then someone takes them away.
-- Nancy Mitford When marriage is outlawed, only outlaws will have inlaws. Marriage is like a cage; one sees the birds outside desperate to get in, and those inside
desperate to get out.
-- Michel de Montaigne Practice random acts of kindness and sensless acts of beauty.
-- Adair Lara Statistics have shown that mortality increases perceptibly in the military during wartime.
-- Alphonse Allais P Men are strong only so long as they represent a strong idea. They become powerless when they
oppose it.
-- Sigmund Freud Under capitalism man exploits man; under socialism the reverse is true.
-- Polish proverb "It is my ambition to say in ten sentences what other men say in whole books--what other men do not say in whole books." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche, Twilight of the Idols) P
Before God we are all equally wise - and equally foolish.
-- Albert Einstein He who laughs last is generally the last to get the joke.
-- Terry Cohen I love deadlines. I especially like the whooshing sound they make as they go flying by.
-- Douglas Adams blah "A subject for a great poet would be God's boredom after the seventh day of creation." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) This novel is not to be tossed lightly aside, but hurled with great force.
-- Dorothy Parker P Govern a family as you would cook a small fish - very gently.
-- Chinese Proverb It is not because it is difficult that we do not dare; it is because we do not dare that things are
difficult.
-- Lucius Anneaus Seneca Not to anticipate is already to moan.
-- Leonardo da Vinci P
The fantasy which serves as a support for the figure of the Stalinist Communist is therefore
exactly the same as the fantasy which is at work in the Tom and Jerry cartoons.
-- Slavoj Zizek Did you hear about the scientist whose wife had twins? He baptized one and kept the other as a control. "A man who flies from his fear may find he has only taken a shortcut to meet it." (John Ronald Reuel Tolkien) I went into a McDonald's yesterday and said, "I'd like some fries." The girl at the counter said,
"Would you like some fries with that?"
-- Jay Leno To write a good love letter, you ought to begin without knowing what you mean to say, and to
finish without knowing what you have written.
-- Jean Jacques Rousseau P "It wasn't until I started reading and found books they wouldn't let us read in school that I discovered you could be insane and happy and have a good life without being like everybody else." (John W You can only find truth with logic if you have already found truth without it.
- Gilbert Keith Chesterton In any contest between power and patience, bet on patience.
- W.B. Prescott P
The difference between fiction and reality? Fiction has to make sense.
-- Tom Clancy All that we see or seem is but a dream within a dream.
-- Edgar Allan Poe Did you hear about the scientist whose wife had twins? He baptized one and kept the other as a control. If ever I get married again it would have to be under an anaesthetic.
-- Marie Tonkin We need a president who's fluent in at least one language.
-- Buck Henry P Early to rise and early to bed.
Makes a male healthy, wealthy and dead.
-- James Thurber Idealism increases in direct proportion to one's distance from the problem.
-- John Galsworthy Mathematics, rightly viewed, posses not only truth, but supreme beauty -- a beauty cold and
austere, like that of sculpture.
-- Bertrand Russell P
When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her. -- Guitry Thought is action in rehearsal.
-- Sigmund Freud Being on the tightrope is living; everything else is waiting.
- Karl Wallenda A Code of Honor: Never approach a friend's girlfriend or wife with mischief as your goal. There
are just too many women in the world to justify that sort of dishonorable behavior. Unless she's
reall Marriage: A ceremony in which rings are put on the finger of the lady and through the nose of the
gentleman.
-- Herbert Spencer P The most exciting phrase to hear in science, the one that heralds the most discoveries, is not
"Eureka!", but "That's funny..."
-- Isaac Asimov Every mother generally hopes that her daughter will snag a better husband than she managed to
do...but she's certain that her boy will never get as great a wife as his father did.
-- Anonymous A woman has got to love a bad man once or twice in her life to be thankful for a good one.
-- Mae West P
My other wife is beautiful. "The man who lets himself be bored is even more contemptible than the bore." (Samuel Butler) "Being born is like being kidnapped. And then sold into slavery." (Andy Warhol) If you can't sleep, then get up and do something instead of lying there and worrying. It's the worry
that gets you, not the loss of sleep.
-- Dale Carnegie Absence diminishes small loves and increases great ones, as the wind blows out the candle and
blows up the bonfire.
-- François de La Rouchefoucauld P Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe.
-- Jackie Mason The coziness between church and state is good for the state and bad for the church.
-- G. K. Chesterton Dishonor will not trouble me, once I am dead.
-- Euripides P
Love one another and you will be happy. It's as simple and as difficult as that.
-- Michael Leunig A good novel tells us the truth about its hero; but a bad novel tells us the truth about its author.
-- G. K. Chesterton "Not only is there no guarantee of the temporal immortality of the human soul, that is to say of its eternal survival after death; but, in any case, this assumption completely fails to accomplish the Never go to bed angry. Stay up and fight.
-- Phyllis Diller "Democracy is the recurrent suspicion that more than half of the people are right more than half of the time." (E. B. White) P There's no problem so awful that you can't add some guilt to it and make it even worse!
-- Calvin "A friendship that exacts oneness of opinion and conduct is not worth much." (Mohandas Gandhi, In Search of the Supreme) No matter who you vote for, the Government always gets in.
-- Anon. P
One survey found that ten percent of Americans thought Joan of Arc was Noah's wife....
-- Robert Boynton He didn't say that. He was reading what was given to him in a speech.
-- Richard Darman, director of OMB, explaining why President Bush wasn't following up on his
campaign pledge that there would be "In literary criticism the critic has no choice but to make over the victim of his attention into something the size and shape of himself." (John Steinbeck, Travels With Charley) Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go.
-- T.S. Eliot There's too much blood in my caffeine system.
-- Seen on a bumper sticker P Even overweight cats instinctively know the cardinal rule: when fat, arrange yourself in slim
poses.
-- John Weitz, American Designer "No one ever owns his youth or the women he loves." (Pedro Almodóvar, Live Flesh) "To err is human; to forgive, divine." (Alexander Pope) P
