If ever I get married again it would have to be under an anaesthetic.
-- Marie Tonkin What I have to say is far more important than how long my eyelashes are.
-- Alanis Morissette, singer, 1995 Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.
-- Seen on a bumper sticker "When once you have tasted flight you will always walk the earth with your eyes turned skyward: for there you have been and there you will always be." (Henry Van Dyke) "Is life not a thousand times too short for us to bore ourselves?" (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) T If you would thoroughly know anything, teach it to others.
-- Tryon Edwards "Be the change that you want to see in the world." (Mohandas Gandhi) You probably wouldn't worry about what people think of you if you could know how seldom they
do.
-- Olin Miller T
Age does not make us childish, as some say; it finds us true children.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe Our marriage would have worked if we hadn't lived together.
-- Joan Thompson Do not assume that she who seeks to comfort you now, lives untroubled among the simple and
quiet words that sometimes do you good. Her life may also have much sadness and difficulty, that
remains fa I feel like Zsa Zsa Gabor's sixth husband. I know what I'm supposed to do, but I don't know how
to make it interesting.
-- Milton Berle, when called to the microphone at the 2nd Annual Comedians Hal "I don't believe people die. They just go uptown. To Bloomingdales. They just take longer to get back." (Andy Warhol) T "All that we see or seem is but a dream within a dream." (Edger Allen Poe) For most of history, Anonymous was a woman.
-- Virginia Woolf Whenever you eliminate the inedible, whatever remains, however unpalatable, must be food.
-- Anonymous T
Men marry because they are tired, women because they are curious; both are disappointed.
-- Oscar Wilde A man's ethical behavior should be based effectually on sympathy, education, and social ties; no
religious basis is necessary. Man would indeed be in a poor way if he had to be restrained by fear
of Learning is what most adults will do for a living in the 21st century.
-- Bob Perelman In the late 1600s the finest instruments originated from three rural families whose workshops
were side by side in the Italian village of Cremona. First were the Amatis, and outside their shop
hung For I am a bear of very little brain and long words bother me.
-- Winnie the Pooh, character from author A. A. Milne T Honeymoon: A short period of doting between dating and debting.
-- Ray Bandy The hard part about being a bartender is figuring out who is drunk and who is just stupid.
-- Richard Braunstein And life is what we make it. Always has been, always will be.
-- Grandma Moses T
The promises of maniacs, like those of women, are not safely relied upon.
-- Joseph Heller, God Knows Advertising may be described as the science of arresting human intelligence long enough to get
money from it.
-- Stephen Leacock "I have an unfortunate personality." (George Orson Welles) "I don't believe people die. They just go uptown. To Bloomingdales. They just take longer to get back." (Andy Warhol) "This is the first age that's paid much attention to the future, which is a little ironic since we may not have one." (Arthur C. Clarke) T If you never want to see a man again, say, "I love you, I want to marry you, I want to have children..." - they leave skid marks. -- Rita Rudner Reason can answer questions, but imagination has to ask them.
-- Ralph N. Gerard "People demand freedom only when they have no power." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) T
"It serves me right for putting all my eggs in one bastard." (Dorothy Parker, 1893-1967, US writer) "The great aim of education is not knowledge but action." (Herbert Spencer) Don't be afraid your life will end; be afraid that it will never begin.
-- Grace Hansen Reading computer manuals without the hardware is a frustrating as reading sex manuals without
the software.
-- Arthur C. Clarke Live truth instead of professing it.
-- Elbert Hubbard T It is never too late to be what you might have been.
-- George Eliot There is no realizable power that man cannot, in time, fashion the tools to attain, nor any power
so secure that the naked ape will not abuse it. So it is written in the genetic cards - only physics Love is the flower of life, and blossoms unexpectedly and without law, and must be plucked
where it is found, and enjoyed for the brief hour of its duration.
-- D. H. Lawrence T
Be tolerant of the human race. Your whole family belongs to it -- and some of your spouse's
family does too.
-- Anonymous Show me a sane man and I will cure him for you.
- Carl Gustav Jung Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It's the transition that's troublesome.
- Isaac Asimov I do not have much patience with a thing of beauty that must be explained to be understood. If it
does need additional interpretation by someone other than the creator, then I question whether it
ha your daughters marry men of substance: gypsies with two bears. T "To introduce something altogether new would mean to begin all over, to become ignorant again, and to run the old, old risk of failing to learn." (Isaac Asimov) If one advances confidently in the direction of one's dreams, and endeavours to live the life which
one has imagined, one will meet with a success unexpected in common hours.
-- Henry David Thoreau Natural ability without education has more often attained to glory and virtue than education
without natural ability.
Cicero (106 BC - 43 BC) T
Man is the only animal that laughs and has a state legislature.
-- Samuel Butler He who dies a thousand deaths meets the final hour with the calmness of one who approaches a
well remembered door.
-- Heywood Brown cannot imagine any condition which would cause this ship to founder. Modern shipbuilding has
gone beyond that.
-- E. I. Smith, Captain of the Titanic "Conforming is only acceptable when you conform with a nonconformist." (John A. Simone Jr.) I am going to put myself to sleep now for a bit longer than usual. Call the time Eternity." (Jerzy Kosinski, Polish novelist, from his suicide note) T Basically, I no longer work for anything but the sensation I have while working.
- Albert Giacometti (sculptor) Wedding is destiny, and hanging likewise.
-- John Heywood I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it.
-- Groucho Marx T
Once a boy becomes a man, he's a man all his life, but a woman is only sexy until she becomes
your wife.
-- Al Bundy, character on "Married with Children," U.S. television show A thing is not necessarily true because badly uttered, nor false because spoken magnificently.
-- St. Augustine A good time to keep your mouth shut is when you're in deep water.
-- Sidney Goff Love me or hate me, but spare me your indifference.
-- Libbie Fudim Mother-in-law: A woman who destroys her son-in-law's peace of mind by giving him a piece of
hers.
-- Anonymous T It is amazing what you can accomplish if you do not care who gets the credit.
-- Harry Truman Give me chastity and continence, but not yet.
- Saint Augustine "The face is the soul of the body." (Ludwig Wittgenstein) T
Famous remarks are very seldom quoted correctly.
-- Simeon Strunsky "The only man who behaved sensibly was my tailor; he took my measurement anew every time he saw me, while all the rest went on with their old measurements and expected them to fit me." (George Bernar "The greatest of faults, I should say, is to be conscious of none." (Thomas Carlyle, 1795-1881) A lover tries to stand in well with the pet dog of the house.
-- Moliere We never live; we are always in the expectation of living.
-- Voltaire T Honor lies in honest toil.
-- Grover Cleveland And now here is my secret, a very simple secret; it is only with the heart that one can see rightly,
what is essential is invisible to the eye.
-- Antoine de Saint-Exupery blah "A friend is someone who gives you total freedom to be yourself." (James Douglas Morrison, lead singer of The Doors) T
To realize that you do not understand is a virtue;
Not to realize that you do not understand is a defect.
--Lao-Tzu, "Tao Teh Ching" "I respect faith, but doubt is what gives you and education." (Wilson Mizner) If you cannot be the master of your language, you must be its slave. If you cannot examine your
thoughts, you have no choice but to think them, however silly they may be.
-- Richard Mitchell, from To the ass, or the sow, their own offspring appears the fairest in creation.
-- Latin Proverb We see the brightness of a new page where everything yet can happen.
-- Rainer Maria Rilke, Book of Hours T "Every now and then say, 'What the fu(c)k.' 'What the fu(c)k' gives you freedom. Freedom brings opportunity. Opportunity makes your future." (Curtis Armstrong, Risky Business, 1983) The open-minded see the truth in different things: the narrow-minded see only the differences.
-- Author Unknown Does anal retentive have a hyphen?
-- Seen on a t-shirt T
"Think where mans glory most begins and ends, and say my glory was I had such friends." (William Butler Yeats) "The easiest kind of relationship is with ten thousand people, the hardest is with one." (Joan Baez) All television is children's television.
-- Richard P. Adler "Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful committed citizens can change the world, indeed it is the only thing that ever has." (Margaret Mead, 1901-78) "All grown-ups were once children, though few of them remember it." (Antoine de Saint Exupéry) T Trust yourself. You know more than you think you do.
-- Dr. Benjamin Spock, American pediatrician, address to new parents They gave me a book of checks. They didn't ask for any deposits.
-- Joe Early, Congressman (D-Mass), at a press conference to answer questions about the
House Bank scandal Why bother with marriage? Just find a woman you hate and buy her a house. T
