The only thing you will ever be able to say in the so-called 'social' sciences is: "some do, some
don't."
-- Ernest Rutherford Usenet is like a herd of performing elephants with diarrhea -- massive, difficult to redirect, awe-
inspiring, entertaining, and a source of mind-boggling amounts of excrement when you least
expect i If Satan ever loses his hair, there'll be hell toupee.
-- Anonymous Dogma is the sacrifice of wisdom to consistency.
- Lewis Perelman A husband is a guy who tells you when you've got on too much lipstick and helps you with your
girdle when your hips stick.
-- Ogden Nash Localities "In some ways, I never outgrew my adolescence. I wake up in the morning and think, 'Oh my God, I'm late for a math test!' But then I say, 'Wait a minute. I'm 40.'" (Daniel Clowes) "Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened." (Theodor Seuss Geisel, a.k.a. Dr. Seuss, 1904-1991) The second half of a man's life is made up of nothing but the habits he has acquired during the
first half.
Fyodor Dostoevsky (1821 - 1881) Localities
Love one another and you will be happy. It's as simple and as difficult as that.
-- Michael Leunig "You can get help from teachers, but you are going to have to learn a lot by yourself, sitting alone in a room." (Theodor Seuss Geisel, a.k.a. Dr. Seuss, 1904-1991, On becoming a writer, NY Times 21 "Treat a man as he is, and he will remain as he is. Treat a man as he could be, and he will become what he should be." (Ralph Waldo Emerson) Familiarity breeds contempt -- and children.
-- Mark Twain LOVE, n. A temporary insanity curable by marriage or by removal of the patient from the
influences under which he incurred the disorder... It is sometimes fatal, but more frequently to the
physician Localities Books had instant replay long before televised sports.
-- Bern Williams "The greatest pleasure in life is doing what others say you cannot do." (Anonymous) Epperson's law:
When a man says it's a silly, childish game, it's probably something his wife can beat him at. Localities
The great tragedy of science, the slaying of a beautiful theory by an ugly fact.
-- Thomas Henry Huxley Golf is a good walk spoiled.
-- Mark Twain "There are some enterprises in which a careful disorderliness is the true method." (Herman Melville, Moby Dick) "There is only one thing more painful than learning from experience and that is not learning from experience." (Archibald McLeish) If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate.
-- Steven Wright Localities There is no realizable power that man cannot, in time, fashion the tools to attain, nor any power so secure that the naked ape will not abuse it. So it is written in the genetic cards - only physics a "There is only one success: to be able to spend your life in your own way, and not to give others absurd maddening claims upon it." (Christopher Darlington Morley) If you can't sleep, then get up and do something instead of lying there and worrying. It's the worry
that gets you, not the loss of sleep.
-- Dale Carnegie Localities
I am beginning to suspect all elaborate and special systems of education. They seem to me to be
built upon the supposition that every child is a kind of idiot who must be taught to think.
-- Anne S Marriage is more than four bare legs in a bed.
-- Hoshang N. Akhtar Man is a natural polygamist. He always has one woman leading him by the nose and another
hanging on to his coattails.
-- H. L. Mencken I shall not waste my days in trying to prolong them.
- Ian L. Fleming A girl must marry for love and keep on marrying until she finds it.
-- Zsa Zsa Gabor Localities True thinkers are characterised by a blending of clearness and mystery.
-- Victor Hugo I prefer the wicked rather than the foolish. The wicked sometimes rest.
-- Alexandre Dumas pere Humor is the first of the gifts to perish in a foreign tongue.
-- Virginia Woolf Localities
The more we do, the more we can do; the more busy we are the more leisure we have.
-- William Hazlitt After finding no qualified candidates for the position of principal, the school board is extremely
pleased to announce the appointment of David Steele to the post.
-- Philip Streifer, Superintendent I tried a mail order bride, once, but she was damaged in the mail, and I had to return the unused part for my full refund. Men have a much better time of it than women; for one thing, they marry later; for another thing, they die earlier. --H.L. Mencken You have no more right to consume happiness without producing it than to consume wealth
without producing it.
-- George Bernard Shaw Localities A man can't be too careful in the choice of his enemies.
- Oscar Wilde That is the best -- to laugh with someone because you think the same things are funny.
-- Gloria Vanderbilt A man must marry only a very pretty woman in case he should ever want some other man to take
her off his hands.
-- Sacha Guitry Localities
Live truth instead of professing it.
-- Elbert Hubbard Stung by the splendour of a sudden thought.
-- Robert Browning The society of women is the element of good manners.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe You must first have a lot of patience to learn to have patience.
-- Stanislaw J. Lec Marriage is like a hot bath. Once you get used to it, it's not so hot. Localities Hope, like faith, is nothing if it is not courageous; it is nothing if it is not ridiculous.
-- Thornton Wilder Look at life through the windshield, not the rear-view mirror.
-- Byrd Baggett I don't know why I did it, I don't know why I enjoyed it, and I don't know why I'll do it again.
-- Bart Simpson, young character from The Simpsons, U.S. animated television show Localities
Do or do not. There is no try.
-- Yoda, character in the movie The Empire Strikes Back My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a
philosopher.
- Socrates The power of accurate observation is commonly called cynicism by those who have not got it.
-- George Bernard Shaw The story of a love is not important - what is important is that one is capable of love. It is perhaps
the only glimpse we are permitted of eternity.
-- Helen Hayes "For how can one know color in perpetual green, and what good is warmth without cold to give it sweetness?" (John Steinbeck, Travels With Charley) Localities For of all sad words of tongue or pen,
The saddest are these: "It might have been!"
-- John Greenleaf Whittier "Every Man and every Woman is a Star." (Aleister Crowley) Mathematics transfigures the fortuitous concourse of atoms into the tracery of the finger of God.
-- Herbert Westren Turnbull Localities
Like a prune, you are not getting any better looking, but you are getting sweeter.
-- N. D. Stice Anyone who considers arithmetical methods of producing random digits is, of course, in a state of
sin.
-- John Von Neuman "Expose yourself to your deepest fear; after that, fear has no power, and the fear of freedom shrinks and vanishes. You are free." (James Douglas Morrison, lead singer of The Doors) "The overman ... Who has organized the chaos of his passions, given style to his character, and become creative. Aware of life's terrors, he affirms life without resentment." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietz Reason can answer questions, but imagination has to ask them.
-- Ralph N. Gerard Localities It is most unwise for people in love to marry.
-- George Bernard Shaw I think of my wife and I think of Lot, and I think of the lucky break he got. Live TV died in the late 1950s, electronic bulletin boards came along in the mid-1980s, meaning
there was about a 25-year gap when it was difficult to put your foot in your mouth and have
people all Localities
A friendship founded on business is better than a business founded on friendship.
- John D. Rockefeller The difference between pornography and erotica is lighting.
-- Gloria Leonard A baby is God's opinion that the world should go on.
-- Carl Sandburg The power of accurate observation is frequently called cynicism by those who don't have it.
- George Bernard Shaw Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution.
-- Mae West Localities You've achieved success in your field when you don't know whether what you're doing is work or
play.
-- WARREN BEATTY This book fills a much-needed gap.
- Moses Hadas in a review It ain't what we don't know that gives us trouble, it's what we know that ain't so.
-- Will Rogers Localities
Learning is a treasure that will follow its owner everywhere.
-- Chinese Proverb My opinions are my wife's, and she says I'm lucky to have them. Establishing yourself, furnishing a house, building up a comfortable existence, and having that menace hanging over your head all the time - no, I prefer to live in hotels, cafés, just passing through My theology, briefly, is that the universe was dictated but not signed.
-- Christopher Morley Power corrupts. Absolute power is kind of neat.
-- John Lehman, Secretary of the Navy, 1981-1987 Localities A man in the house is worth two in the street.
-- Mae West Sex is like bridge: If you don't have a good partner, you better have a good hand.
-- Charles Pierce A man can do what he wants, but not want what he wants.
-- Arthur Schoperhauer Localities
Most turkeys taste better the day after; my mother's tasted better the day before.
-- Rita Rudner Learn to laugh at your troubles and you'll never run out of things to laugh at.
-- Lyn Karol Hell is a half-filled auditorium.
-- Robert Frost To expect defeat is nine-tenths of defeat itself.
-- Francis Crawford The Middle Eastern states aren't nations; they're quarrels with borders.
-- P. J. O'Rourke Localities When you're away, I'm restless, lonely
Wretched, bored, dejected; only
here's the rub, my darling dear,
I feel the same when you are here.
-- Samuel Hoffenstein There is nothing better for the spirit or the body than a love affair. It elevates the thoughts and
flattens the stomachs.
-- Barbara Howar A problem is a chance for you to do your best.
-- Buke Ellington Localities
