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Life does not cease to be funny when people die any more than it ceases to be serious when
people laugh.
-- George Bernard Shaw The west wasn't won on salad.
-- ND Beef Council, billboard advertisement, 1990 It is not good enough to have a good mind; the main thing is to use it well.
-- Rene Descartes When we do the best that we can, we never know what miracle is wrought in our life, or in the life
of another.
-- Helen Keller I still say a church steeple with a lightning rod on top shows a lack of confidence.
-- Doug MacLeod Industries Common sense and a sense of humor are the same thing, moving at different speeds. A sense of
humor is just common sense, dancing.
-- Clive James If you want to recapture your youth, just cut off his allowance.
-- Al Bernstein Marriage is like a cage--one sees the birds outside desperate to get in and those inside equally
desparate to get out.
-- Di Peatlins Industries
"Try not to have a good time ... This is supposed to be educational." (Charles Schultz) An economist is a man who states the obvious in terms of the incomprehensible.
-- Alfred A. Knopf Men are strong only so long as they represent a strong idea. They become powerless when they
oppose it.
-- Sigmund Freud You never see a man walking down the street with a woman who has a little pot belly and a bald
spot.
-- Elayne Boosler Sometimes a scream is better than a thesis.
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson Industries The more faithfully you listen to the voices within you, the better you will hear what is sounding
outside.
-- Dag Hammarskjold "No one ever owns his youth or the women he loves." (Pedro Almodóvar, Live Flesh) When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.
-- Sacha Guitry Industries
Despite the high cost of living it remains a popular item.
-- Anonymous "Democracy is a form of government that substitutes election by the incompetent many for appointment by the corrupt few." (George Bernard Shaw) "A woman may very well form a friendship with a man, but for this to endure, it must be assisted by a little physical antipathy." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) A wasted youth is better by far than a wise and productive old age.
-- Meat Loaf, from the song "Wasted Youth" on the album Bat Out of Hell II "The greatest pleasure in life is doing what others say you cannot do." (Anonymous) Industries Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than going to a garage makes you an
automobile.
-- Billy Sunday Knowledge is the intellectual manipulation of carefully verified observations.
-- Sigmund Freud "To pretend, I actually do the thing: I have therefore only pretended to pretend." (Jacques Derrida, French 'deconstructionist') Industries
A man can't get rich if he takes proper care of his family.
-- Navaho saying "Do you know that places only yield up their secrets, their most profound mysteries, to those who are just passing through?" (Salman Rushdie, The Moor's Last Sigh) Every calling is great when greatly pursued.
-- Oliver Wendell Holmes Thomas Jefferson--still surv...
-- John Adams, dying words "Whether it is a black cat or a white cat, as long as it can catch the rat, it is a good cat." (Deng Xiao Ping) Industries May you be blessed with a wife so healthy and strong, she can pull the plow when your horse drops dead. He would make a lovely corpse.
- Charles Dickens "In order to keep anything cultural, logical, or ideological, you have to reinvent the reality of it." (Ani Difranco) Industries
Fighting is essentially a masculine idea; a woman's weapon is her tongue.
-- Hermione Gingold Christianity has not been tried and found wanting; it has been found difficult and not tried.
-- G. K. Chesterton There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage. -- James Holt McGavran When a girl marries she exchanges the attention of many men for the inattention of one.
-- Helen Rowland CAPITAL, n. The seat of misgovernment. That which provides the fire, the pot, the dinner, the
table and the knife and fork for the anarchist; the part of the repast that himself supplies is the
disg Industries I think, therefore I'm single.
-- Female philosopher A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he is finished.
-- Zsa Zsa Gabor There is no cure for birth and death save to enjoy the interval.
-- George Santayana Industries
We come to love not by finding a perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person
perfectly.
-- Anonymous Good teaching is one-fourth preparation and three-fourths theater.
-- Gail Godwin Marriage is an adventure, like going to war.
-- G. K. Chesterton "If this is coffee, please bring me some tea; but if this is tea, please bring me some coffee." (Abraham Lincoln, 1809-65) If you can count your money, you don't have a billion dollars.
- J. Paul Getty Industries Many a man that could rule a hundherd millyon sthrangers with an ir'n hand is careful to take off
his shoes in the front hallway whin he comes home late at night.
-- Finley Peter Dunne, Mr. Dooley O Compromise: An amiable arrangement between husband and wife whereby they agree to let her
have her own way.
-- Anonymous the social sciences were for all those who had not yet decided what to do with their lives, and for
all those whose premature frustrations led them into the sterile alleys of confrontation.
-- Peter Industries
I do not have much patience with a thing of beauty that must be explained to be understood. If it
does need additional interpretation by someone other than the creator, then I question whether it
ha A true gentleman is one who is never unintentionally rude.
-- Oscar Wilde "Self-confidence is the first requisite for achieving great things." (Samuel Johnson) It is unbecoming for young men to utter maxims.
- Aristotle blah "The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants." (Thomas Jefferson) Industries "Every act of violence increases the recruitment of terrorists. Iraq has been turned into a base of terror." (Noam Chomsky, from The Toronto Star, March 23, 2004) I have always dressed according to certain Basic Guy Fashion Rules, including:
* Both of your socks should always be the same color
* Or they should at least both be fairly dark
-- Dave Barry My Alma mater was books, a good library . . . . I could spend the rest of my life reading, just
satisfying my curiosity.
--Malcolm X Industries
If absolute power corrupts absolutely, does absolute powerlessness make you pure?
-- Harry Shearer Very little is known of the Canadian country since it is rarely visited by anyone but the Queen and
illiterate sport fishermen.
-- P. J. O'Rourke A scholar who cherishes the love of comfort is not fit to be deemed a scholar.
- Lao-Tzu blah "Some of the worlds greatest feats were accomplished by people not smart enough to know they were impossible. unattributed" (Anonymous) Now join your hands, and with your hands your hearts.
-- William Shakespeare, King Henry the Sixth Industries What is the answer? In that case, what is the question?
-- Gertrude Stein, dying words An act of love that fails is just as much a part of the divine life as an act of love that succeeds, for
love is measured by fullness, not by reception.
-- Harold Loukes The telephone company is urging people to *please* not use the telephone unless it is absolutely
necessary in order to keep the lines open for emergency personnel. We'll be right back after this
bre Industries
I'm an excellent housekeeper. Every time I get a divorce, I keep the house.
-- Zsa Zsa Gabor "If liberty means anything at all, it means the right to tell people what they don't want to hear." (George Orwell) There's nothing wrong with having nothing to say -- unless you insist on saying it.
-- Anonymous "Every act of creation is first an act of destruction." (Pablo Picasso) He who dies a thousand deaths meets the final hour with the calmness of one who approaches a
well remembered door.
-- Heywood Brown Industries "There cannot be a God because, if there were one, I would not believe that I was not He." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) If you would thoroughly know anything, teach it to others.
-- Tryon Edwards "I heard the old, old, men say 'all that's beautiful drifts away, like the waters.'" (William Butler Yeats) Industries
Guide to understanding a net.addict's day:
Slow day: didn't have much to do, so spent three hours on usenet.
Busy day: managed to work in three hours of usenet.
Bad day: barely squeezed in three ho "I'll tell you something: Luxury disgusts me." (Giorgio Armani) It is not necessary that whilst I live I live happily; but it is necessary that so long as I live I should
live honourably.
-- Kant, Immanuel Marriage is bliss. Ignorance is bliss. Ergo...
-- Anonymous "One of the advantages of being disorderly is that one is constantly making exciting discoveries." (A. A. Milne) Industries The democratic theory is that if you accumulate enough ignorance at the polls, you produce
intelligence.
-- Philo Vance "Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful committed citizens can change the world, indeed it is the only thing that ever has." (Margaret Mead, 1901-78) Nobody is more dangerous than he who imagines himself pure in heart; for his purity, by
definition, is unassailable.
-- James Baldwin, Nobody Knows My Name, 1961 Industries
Asking an incumbent member of Congress to vote for term limits is a bit like asking a chicken to
vote for Colonel Sanders.
-- Bob Inglis, 1995 Marriage is like a cage; one sees the birds outside desperate to get in, and those inside
desperate to get out.
-- Michel de Montaigne No matter who you vote for, the Government always gets in.
-- Anon. When people talk, listen completely. Most people never listen.
-- Ernest Hemingway Jake liked his women the way he liked his kiwi fruit: sweet yet tart, firm-fleshed yet yielding to the
touch, and covered with short brown fuzzy hair.
-- Jonathan S. Haas Industries Always bear in mind that your own resolution to success is more important than any other one
thing.
-- Abraham Lincoln Basically, I no longer work for anything but the sensation I have while working.
- Albert Giacometti (sculptor) The old believe everything, the middle-aged suspect everything, the young know everything.
-- Oscar Wilde Industries
