Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about something you said; after marriage,
he'll fall asleep before you finish saying it.
-- Helen Roland Be tolerant of the human race. Your whole family belongs to it -- and some of your spouse's
family does too.
-- Anonymous Love is the delusion that one man or woman differs from another.
-- H. L. Mencken To heck with marrying a girl who makes biscuits like her mother--I want to marry one who makes dough like her father. A man who has never made a woman angry is a failure in life.
-- Christopher Morley M "Humanity has won its battle. Liberty now has a country." (Marquis de Lafayette) Food, one assumes, provides nourishment; but Americans eat it fully aware that small amounts of
poison have been added to improve its appearance and delay its putrefaction.
-- John Cage "Humanity has won its battle. Liberty now has a country." (Marquis de Lafayette) M
Computers will not be perfected until they can compute how much more than the estimate the job
will cost.
-- Anon If you want a place in the sun, you've got to put up with a few blisters.
-- Abigail Van Buren This country has come to feel the same when Congress is in session as when the baby gets hold
of a hammer.
-- Will Rogers The only thing you will ever be able to say in the so-called 'social' sciences is: "some do, some
don't."
-- Ernest Rutherford Society is like a stew. If you don't stir it up every once in a while then a layer of scum floats to the
top.
-- Ed Abbey M "Good taste is the first refuge of the non-creative. It is the last-ditch stand of the artist." (Marshall McLuhan) I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it.
-- Groucho Marx "The love of liberty is the love of others; the love of power is the love of ourselves." (William Hazlitt) M
My mother's menu consisted of two choices: Take it or leave it.
-- Buddy Hackett There is no one so bound to his own face that he does not cherish the hope of presenting another
to the world.
-- Antonio Machado I sometimes think that God, in creating man, overestimated His ability.
-- Oscar Wilde To love is to receive a glimpse of heaven.
-- Karen Sunde There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home.
- Ken Olson, president, chairman and founder of Digital Equipment Corp., 1977 M Property may be destroyed and money may lose its purchasing power; but, character, health,
knowledge and good judgement will always be in demand under all conditions.
-- Roger Babson Have you ever noticed? Anybody going slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than
you is a maniac.
-- George Carlin Someday is not a day of the week.
-- Anon. M
Man is a rational animal who always loses his temper when he is called upon to act in
accordance with the dictates of reason.
-- Oscar Wilde As life is action and passion, it is required of a man that he should share the passion and action
of his time, at the peril of being not to have lived.
-- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr. I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me. Marriage is a thing which puts a ring on a woman's finger and two under the man's eyes. Genius has somewhat of the infantine; But of the childish not a touch or taint.
-- Robert Browning M A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age.
-Robert Frost (1874-1963) "He that would make his own liberty secure must guard even his enemy from oppression; for if he violates this duty he establishes a precedent that will reach to himself." (Thomas Paine) Democracy is a device that insures we shall be governed no better than we deserve.
-- George Bernard Shaw M
"Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful committed citizens can change the world, indeed it is the only thing that ever has." (Margaret Mead, 1901-78) Consequences, schmonsequences, as long as I'm rich!
-- Chuck Jones-directed cartoon Patriotism is the virtue of the vicious.
-- Oscar Wilde blah blah blah blah blah "This is the way the world ends: not with a bang, but a whimper." (Thomas Stearns Eliot, aka T. S. Eliot) _end]
[text_start]
"Hello Kitty is an icon that doesn't stand for a The wit of a graduate student is like champagne. Canadian champagne.
-- Robertson Davies M Honorable, adj. Afflicted with an impediment in one's reach. In legislative bodies, it is customary
to mention all members as honorable; as, ``the honorable gentleman is a scurvy cur.'
-- Bierce, A In the halls of justice, the only justice is in the halls.
-- Lenny Bruce If you don't double-click me, I can't do anything.
-- John Aniston, on how computers have taken over his life M
It is well, when judging a friend, to remember that he is judging you with the same godlike and
superior impartiality.
-- Arnold Bennett "Expect nothing. Live frugally on surprise." (Alice Walker) Be willing to make decisions. That's the most important quality in a good leader. Don't fall victim
to what I call the 'ready-aim-aim-aim-aim syndrome.' You must be willing to fire.
-- Gen. George Every act of creation is first an act of destruction.
-- Pablo Picasso The price of freedom is eternal vigilance.
-- Thomas Jefferson M "There cannot be a God because, if there were one, I would not believe that I was not He." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) It was the experience of mystery -- even if mixed with fear -- that engendered religion.
- Albert Einstein Say goodbye to the oldies, but goodies, because the good old days weren't always good and
tomorrow aint as bad as it seems.
-- Billy Joel M
Now comes the mystery.
-- Henry Ward Beecher, dying words, March 8, 1887 Democracy is a form of government in which it is permitted to wonder aloud what the country
could do under first-class management.
-- Senator Soaper What we anticipate seldom occurs: but what we least expect generally happens.
-- Benjamin Disraeli By the time (the Leaning Tower of Pisa) was 10% built, everyone knew it would be a total
disaster. But the investment was so big they felt compelled to go on. Since its completion, it cost
a fortune The nice thing about being a celebrity is that if you bore people they think it's their fault.
- Henry Kissinger M All that we see or seem is but a dream within a dream.
-- Edgar Allan Poe What is politics, after all, but the compulsion to preside over property and make other peoples'
decisions for them?
-- Tom Robbins, Skinny Legs and All Immature love says: "I love you because I need you." Mature love says: "I need you because I
love you."
-- Erich Fromm M
A man who marries a woman to educate her falls a victim to the same fallacy as the woman who
marries a man to reform him.
-- Elbert Hubbard The difference between literature and journalism is that journalism is unreadable and literature is
not read.
-- Oscar Wilde Success usually comes to those who are too busy to be looking for it
- Henry David Thoreau "The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time." (Abraham Lincoln, 1809-65) "The greatest dangers to liberty lurk in insidious encroachment by men of zeal, well meaning, but without understanding." (Louis Brandeis) M Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.
-- Erma Bombeck The only thing worse than being talked about is not being talked about.
-- Oscar Wilde Repentance is not so much remorse for what we have done as the fear of the consequences.
-- François de La Rouchefoucauld, Maxims, 1665 M
"One may sometimes tell a lie, but the grimace that accompanies it tells the truth." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) "Dear World, I am leaving because I am bored. I feel I have lived long enough. I am leaving you with your worries in this sweet cesspool. Good luck." (George Sanders, suicide note) "The evil that is in the world almost always comes of ignorance, and good intentions may do as much harm as malevolence if they lack understanding." (Albert Camus) Our own heart, and not other men's opinions form our true honor.
-- Coleridge, Samuel Taylor The old believe everything, the middle-aged suspect everything, the young know everything.
-- Oscar Wilde M I hope you have not been leading a double life, pretending to be wicked and being really good all
the time. That would be hypocrisy.
-- Oscar Wilde "There are some enterprises in which a careful disorderliness is the true method." (Herman Melville, Moby Dick) I don't know if God exists, but it would be better for His reputation if He didn't.
-- Jules Renard M
Statistics have shown that mortality increases perceptibly in the military during wartime.
-- Alphonse Allais Based on what you know about him in history books, what do you think Abraham Lincoln would
be doing if he were alive today?
1) Writing his memoirs of the Civil War.
2) Advising the President.
3) D A woman seldom asks advice before she has bought her wedding clothes.
-- Joseph Addison I would rather live and love where death is king than have eternal life where love is not.
-- Robert G. Ingersoll How many legs does a dog have if you call the tail a leg? Four. Calling a tail a leg doesn't make it
a leg.
-- Abraham Lincoln M "The proper office of a friend is to side with you when you are wrong. Nearly anybody will side with you when you are right." (Mark Twain) "A thing of beauty is a joy forever." (John Keats) There is a coherent plan in the universe, though I don't know what it's a plan for.
-- Fred Hoyle M
"Not only is there no guarantee of the temporal immortality of the human soul, that is to say of its eternal survival after death; but, in any case, this assumption completely fails to accomplish the Democracy substitutes election by the incompetent many for the appointment by the corrupt few.
-- George Bernard Shaw Giving every man a vote has no more made men wise and free than Christianity has made them
good.
-- H.L. Mencken In the spider-web of facts, many a truth is strangled.
-- Paul Eldridge Conservatives are not necessarily stupid, but most stupid people are conservatives.
-- John Stuart Mill M Where there is love there is life.
-- Gandhi It's not the size of the dog in the fight, it's the size of the fight in the dog.
-- Mark Twain You can't say civilization isn't advancing: in every war they kill you in a new way.
-- Will Rogers M
