"Life is a great surprise. I don't see why death should not be an even greater one." (Vladimir Nabokov) Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.
-- George Santayana In the sciences, we are now uniquely privileged to sit side by side with the giants on whose
shoulders we stand.
-- Gerald Holton Mary had a little lamb and the doctor fainted.
-- Anonymous My father was a minister. I had to make up for the lack of sin.
-- Milwuakee mayor, on why he became a politician N cannot imagine any condition which would cause this ship to founder. Modern shipbuilding has
gone beyond that.
-- E. I. Smith, Captain of the Titanic Always go to the bathroom when you have a chance.
-- King George V Meetings are an addictive, highly self-indulgent activity that corporations and other large
organizations habitually engage in only because they cannot actually masturbate.
-- Dave Barry N
Laywers, I suppose, were children once.
-- Charles Lamb Ridicule is generally made use of to laugh men out of virtue and good sense, by attacking
everything praiseworthy in human life.
-- Joseph Addison "I have realized that the past and future are real illusions, that they exist in the present, which is what there is and all there is." (Alan Watts) "Dying is the most embarrassing thing that can ever happen to you, because someone's got to take care of all your details." (Andy Warhol, America, 1985) Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same.
-- Oscar Wilde N Work is the curse of the drinking class.
-- Oscar Wilde They gave me a book of checks. They didn't ask for any deposits.
-- Joe Early, Congressman (D-Mass), at a press conference to answer questions about the
House Bank scandal Victory belongs to the most persevering.
-- Napoleon Bonaparte N
A woman may very well form a friendship with a man, but for this to endure, it must be assisted
by a little physical antipathy.
-- Friedrich Nietzsche Honor the ocean of love.
-- George de Benneville The most wasted day of all is that in which we have not laughed.
-- Sebastian Roch Nicolas Chamfort Honor's a thing too subtle for wisdom; if honor lie in eating, he's right honorable.
-- Beaumont, Francis "Furious activity is no substitute for understanding." (H. H. Williams) N "There is only one success: to be able to spend your life in your own way, and not to give others absurd maddening claims upon it." (Christopher Darlington Morley) "Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot, nothing is going to get better. It's not." (Theodor Seuss Geisel, a.k.a. Dr. Seuss, 1904-1991) Based on what you know about him in history books, what do you think Abraham Lincoln would
be doing if he were alive today?
1) Writing his memoirs of the Civil War.
2) Advising the President.
3) D N
The only thing that holds a marriage together is the husband bein' big enough to keep his mouth
shut, to step back and see where his wife is wrong.
-- Archie Bunker, character on "All in the Family, If life were predictable it would cease to be life, and be without flavor.
-- Eleanor Roosevelt And now here is my secret, a very simple secret; it is only with the heart that one can see rightly,
what is essential is invisible to the eye.
-- Antoine de Saint-Exupery A woman may very well form a friendship with a man, but for this to endure, it must be assisted
by a little physical antipathy.
-- Friedrich Nietzsche Better to die ten thousand deaths than wound my honor.
-- Joseph Addison N The power of accurate observation is frequently called cynicism by those who don't have it.
- George Bernard Shaw A good marriage is like a casserole, only those responsible for it really know what goes in it.
-- Anonymous Your every voter, as surely as your chief magistrate, exercises a public trust.
-- Grover Cleveland N
He that always gives way to others will end in having no principles of his own.
-- Aesop How could they tell?
-- Dorothy Parker, upon hearing that President Coolidge had died "The one charm about marriage is that it makes a life of deception absolutely necessary for both parties." (Oscar Wilde) I'm worried that the universe will soon need replacing. It's not holding a charge.
-- Edward Chilton A narcissist is someone better-looking than you are.
-- Gore Vidal N I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me. "The monster a child knows best and is most concerned with [is] the monster he feels or fears himself to be. " (Bruno Bettelheim, child psychologist) Actually, the only memory I have of being a Cub Scout was trying to get my hat back. That was all
I did. Run back and forth at my bus stop going "Quit it."
-- Jerry Seinfeld N
blah "It is a grand mistake to think of being great without goodness and I pronounce it as certain that there was never a truly great man that was not at the same time truly virtuous." (Benjamin Fran It is well, when judging a friend, to remember that he is judging you with the same godlike and
superior impartiality.
-- Arnold Bennett Husbands are awkward things to deal with; even keeping them in hot water will not make them
tender.
-- Mary Buckley A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle.
-- Gloria Steinem We never live; we are always in the expectation of living.
-- Voltaire N Life is like a movie--since there aren't any commercial breaks, you have to get up and go to the
bathroom in the middle of it.
-- Nick Mirov There is more stupidity than hydrogen in the universe, and it has a longer shelf life.
- Frank Zappa What I look forward to is continued immaturity followed by death.
-- Dave Barry N
We must believe in free will, we have no choice.
-- Isaac B. Singer I'm not into working out. My philosophy: No pain, no pain.
-- Carol Leifer Integrity without knowledge is weak and useless, and knowledge without integrity is dangerous
and dreadful.
-- Samuel Johnson Property may be destroyed and money may lose its purchasing power; but, character, health,
knowledge and good judgement will always be in demand under all conditions.
-- Roger Babson The man who reads nothing at all is better educated than the man who reads nothing but
newspapers.
-- Thomas Jefferson N Children should be like waffles--you should be able to throw the first one away.
-- Mary Alice Messenger Joy is but the sign that creative emotion is fulfilling its purpose.
-- Charles Du Bos "We're an embarrasment to college graduates across America." (James Douglas Morrison, lead singer of The Doors) N
I could prove God statistically.
-- George Gallup A human being is a part of the whole, called by us Universe, a part limited in time and space. He
experiences himself, his thoughts and feelings as something separated from the rest--a kind of
optic Spinster: A bachelor's wife. A person starts to live when he can live outside himself.
-- Albert Einstein Now is the time for all good men to come to.
-- Walt Kelly N America is the only nation in history which miraculously has gone directly from barbarism to
degeneration without the usual intervention of civilization.
-- George Clemenceau "Education is a vacine for violence." (Edward James Olmos) If law school is so hard to get through... how come there are so many lawyers?
-- Calvin Trillin N
It is not good enough to have a good mind; the main thing is to use it well.
-- Rene Descartes "I respect faith, but doubt is what gives you and education." (Wilson Mizner) blah "The best students always are flunking. Every good teacher knows that." (Robert M. Pirsig, Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance) "Freedom of press is limited to those who own one." (Henry Louis Mencken) "If I could drop dead right now, I'd be the happiest man alive." (Samuel Goldwyn) N "No man means all he says, and yet very few say all they mean, for words are slippery and thought is viscous." (Henry B. Adams) Substitute "damn" every time you're inclined to write "very"; your editor will delete it and the
writing will be just as it should be.
-- Mark Twain There is a theory which states that if ever anybody discovers exactly what the Universe is for and
why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and
inex N
For a male and female to live continuously together is...biologically speaking, an extremely
unnatural condition.
-- Robert Briffault Once all struggle is grasped, miracles are possible.
-- Mao Tse-tung "I am convinced that it is not the fear of death, of our lives ending that haunts our sleep so much as the fear ... that as far as the world is concerned, we might as well never have lived." (Rabbi H "Common sense and education are highly compatible; in fact, neither is worth much without the other." (Donald G. Smith) "In the End, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends." (Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.) N "Even a stopped clock is right twice a day." (Marie von Ebner-Eschenbach) "The greatest of faults, I should say, is to be conscious of none." (Thomas Carlyle, 1795-1881) Giving birth is like taking your lower lip and forcing it over your head.
-- Carol Burnett N
"I feel I have to protect myself against things. So I'm pretty careful to lose most of them." (George Orson Welles) A memorandum is written not to inform the reader but to protect the writer.
-- Dean Acheson "In times of change learners inherit the earth; while the learned find themselves beautifully equipped to deal with a world that no longer exists." (Eric Hoffer) "Humans beings can always be relied upon to assert, with vigor, their god-given right to be stupid." (Dean Koontz, Seize the Night) "Fear is the dark room where the Devil develops his negatives." (Gary Busey) N "I put on an act sometimes, and people think I'm insensitive. Really, it's like a kind of armor because I'm too sensitive. If there are two hundred people in a room and one of them doesn't like me, I' The advantage of a classical education is that it enables you to despise the wealth which it
prevents you from achieving.
-- Russell Green Fanaticism consists of redoubling your efforts when you have forgotten your aim.
-- George Santayana N
