Elegance of language may not be in the power of all of us; but simplicity and straight forwardness
are. Write much as you would speak; speak as you think. If with your inferior, speak no coarser
tha I would have made a good Pope.
-- Richard Nixon, U.S. President The great advantage of being in a rut is that when one is in a rut, one knows exactly where one
is.
-- Arnold Bennett "These are days you'll remember." If you recall nothing else from your graduation ceremony,
remember you heard the New Jersey Governor quote from 10,000 Maniacs.
-- Christine Todd, NJ Governor, Whea Teach a parrot the terms "supply and demand" and you've got an economist.
-- Thomas Carlyle Provinces "What is the difference between exploring and being lost?" (Dan Eldon, photojournalist) "I have no special gift; I am only passionately curious." (Albert Einstein) Food, one assumes, provides nourishment; but Americans eat it fully aware that small amounts of
poison have been added to improve its appearance and delay its putrefaction.
-- John Cage Provinces
"Liberty means responsibility. That is why most men dread it." (George Bernard Shaw) History will be kind to me for I intend to write it.
-- Winston Churchill "The formula for my happiness: a Yes, a No, a straight line, a goal." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) This country has come to feel the same when Congress is in session as when the baby gets hold
of a hammer.
-- Will Rogers Ah Mozart! He was happily married - but his wife wasn't. -- Borge Provinces I married beneath me. All women do.
-- Lady Nancy Astor, attributed I still believe in liberalism today as much as I ever did, but, oh, there was a happy time when I
believed in liberals...
-- G. K. Chesterton Never raise your hands to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected.
-- Red Buttons Provinces
"The order of the world is always right - such is the judgment of God. For God has departed, but he has left his judgment behind, the way the Cheshire Cat left his grin." (Jean Baudrillard) I believe in getting into hot water; it keeps you clean.
-- G. K. Chesterton Dogma is the sacrifice of wisdom to consistency.
- Lewis Perelman A beauty is a woman you notice; A charmer is one who notices you.
-- Adlai Stevenson You have no more right to consume happiness without producing it than to consume wealth
without producing it.
-- George Bernard Shaw Provinces "There are some enterprises in which a careful disorderliness is the true method." (Herman Melville, Moby Dick) If you don't know how to do something, you don't know how to do it with a computer.
-- Anon. Many a man in love with a dimple makes the mistake of marrying the whole girl.
-- Stephen Leacock Provinces
You can close your eyes to reality, but not to memories.
-- Stanislaw J. Lem "Death solves all problems--no man, no problem." (Josef Stalin) Each of us has a spark of life inside us, and our highest endeavor ought to be to set off that spark
in one another.
-- Kenny Ausubel A problem is a chance for you to do your best.
-- Buke Ellington "It ends not with a bang, but a whimper." (Thomas Stearns Eliot, aka T. S. Eliot, The Hollow Man) Provinces "Politics is my hobby. Smut is my vocation." (Larry Flynt) The hard part about being a bartender is figuring out who is drunk and who is just stupid.
-- Richard Braunstein A scholar who cherishes the love of comfort is not fit to be deemed a scholar.
- Lao-Tzu Provinces
"Death is only a launching into the region of the strange Untried; it is but the first salutation to the possibilities of the immense Remote, the Wild, the Watery, the Unshored..." (Herman Melville, "To educate educators! But the first ones must educate themselves! And for these I write." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) blah "It is a grand mistake to think of being great without goodness and I pronounce it as certain that there was never a truly great man that was not at the same time truly virtuous." (Benjamin Fran The advantage of a classical education is that it enables you to despise the wealth which it
prevents you from achieving.
-- Russell Green Nothing says loving like marrying your cousin! -- Al Bundy Provinces All you need is love.
-- The Beatles, song title The Internet is so big, so powerful and pointless that for some people it is a complete substitute
for life.
-- Andrew Brown Anyway, no drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of society. If we're looking for the
source of our troubles, we shouldn't test people for drugs, we should test them for stupidity,
ign Provinces
A witty saying proves nothing.
- Voltaire I could prove God statistically.
-- George Gallup Life consists not in holding good cards but in playing those you hold well.
-- Josh Billings Never be possessive. If a female friend lets on that she is going out with another man, be kind
and understanding. If she says she would like to go out with the Dallas Cowboys, including the
coachin Victory belongs to the most persevering.
-- Napoleon Bonaparte Provinces If you can't get rid of the skeleton in your closet, you'd best teach it to dance.
- George Bernard Shaw "Do something for the joy of doing it and pray you won't be punished." (Sammy Cahn) Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away.
-- Philip K. Dick Provinces
Marriage is the only war in which you sleep with the enemy.
-- Anonymous "Children spell love...T-I-M-E." (Dr. Anthony P. Witham) An undefined problem has an infinite number of solutions.
-- Robert A. Humphrey "A conservative is a man with two perfectly good legs who, however, has never learned how to walk forward." (Franklin Delano Roosevelt, 1882 - 1945, 32nd U.S. President) A problem is a chance for you to do your best.
-- Buke Ellington Provinces Marriage is low down, but you spend the rest of your life paying for it. I hate mankind, for I think myself to be one of them, and I know how bad I am.
-- Samuel Johnson It ain't what we don't know that gives us trouble, it's what we know that ain't so.
-- Will Rogers Provinces
Thank God - every morning when you get up - that you have something to do which must be
done, whether you like it or not. Being forced to work, and forced to do your best, will breed in you
a hundre Every mother generally hopes that her daughter will snag a better husband than she managed to
do...but she's certain that her boy will never get as great a wife as his father did.
-- Anonymous I prefer the wicked rather than the foolish. The wicked sometimes rest.
-- Alexandre Dumas pere An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have; the older she gets the more interested
he is in her.
-- Agatha Christie I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years.
-- Sam Kinison Provinces Sir, I would rather be right than be President.
-- Henry Clay, Speech, 1850, referring to the Compromise Measure Trouble is a part of your life, and if you don't share it, you don't give the person that loves you
enough chance to love you enough.
-- Dinah Shore Stung by the splendour of a sudden thought.
-- Robert Browning Provinces
When in doubt, make a fool of yourself. There is a microscopically thin line between being
brilliantly creative and acting like the most gigantic idiot on earth. So what the hell, leap.
-- Cynthia H For one human being to love another: that is perhaps the most difficult of our tasks; the ultimate,
the last test and proof, the work for which all other work is but preparation.
-- Rainer Maria Ril Courage is the ladder on which all the other virtues mount.
-- Clare Boothe Luce "The reason why kids are crazy is because nobody can face the responsibility of bringing them up." (John Lennon) We cannot really love anybody with whom we never laugh.
-- Agnes Repplier Provinces Work is the refuge of people who have nothing better to do.
-- Oscar Wilde War is a profession by which a man cannot live honorably; an employment by which the soldier, if
he would reap any profit, is obliged to be false, rapacious, and cruel.
-- Niccolo Machiavelli "The purpose of Compulsory Education is to deprive the common people of their commonsense." (Gilbert Keith Chesterton) Provinces
Why yes -- a bulletproof vest.
-- James Rodges, murderer, on his final request before the firing squad "Frank and explicit; that is the right line to take when you wish to conceal your own mind and to confuse the minds of others." (Benjamin Disraeli, Sybil) Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go.
-- T.S. Eliot Friends need not agree in everything or go always together, or have no comparable other
friendships of the same intimacy. On the contrary, in friendship union is more about ideal things:
and in that It may be that the race is not always to the swift, nor the battle to the strong -- but that is the way
to bet.
-- Damon Runyan Provinces People think we make $3 million and $4 million a year. They don't realize that most of us only
make $500,000.
-- Pete Incaviglia, baseball player, 1990 The second day of a diet is always easier than the first. By the second day you're off it.
-- Jackie Gleason In a hierarchy, every employee tends to rise to his level of incompetence. Therefore:
? In time, every post tends to be occupied by an employee who is incompetent to carry out its
duties.
? Work Provinces
Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.
-- Carl Gustav Jung It's not the size of the dog in the fight, it's the size of the fight in the dog.
-- Mark Twain "A man must dream a long time in order to act with grandeur, and dreaming is nursed in darkness." (Jean Genet) It is the final proof of God's omnipotence that he need not exist in order to save us.
-- Peter De Vries For centuries, theologians have been explaining the unknowable in terms of the-not-worth-
knowing.
- Henry Louis Mencken Provinces Neither fire nor wind, birth nor death can erase our good deeds.
-- Buddha "Who controls the past controls the future. Who controls the present controls the past." (George Orwell) "If you want to get laid, go to college. If you want an education, go to the library." (Frank Zappa) Provinces
