"The act of policing is, in order to punish less often, to punish more severely." (Napoleon Bonaparte) "Being born is like being kidnapped. And then sold into slavery." (Andy Warhol) Man is the only animal that blushes--or needs to.
-- Mark Twain He who laughs, lasts.
-- Mary Pettibone Poole He didn't say that. He was reading what was given to him in a speech.
-- Richard Darman, director of OMB, explaining why President Bush wasn't following up on his
campaign pledge that there would be Personal Homepages Under certain circumstances, profanity provides a relief denied even to prayer.
-- Mark Twain Love is the wisdom of the fool and the folly of the wise.
-- Samuel Johnson Happiness in intelligent people is the rarest thing I know.
-- Ernest Hemingway Personal Homepages
When yer in a funk, people in love are a royal pain in the patookus.
-- Portnoy, character in "Outland," comic strip by Berkely Breathed The trouble with her is that she lacks the power of conversation but not the power of speech.
-- George Bernard Shaw Radio news is bearable. This is due to the fact that while the news is being broadcast the disc
jockey is not allowed to talk.
-- Fran Lebowitz People say "I want peace." If you remove I {ego}, and your want {desire}, you are left with peace.
-- Satya Sai Baba The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in the mind at the same
time, and still retain the ability to function.
-- F. Scott Fitzgerald Personal Homepages Bride: A woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her. Value your words. Each one may be the last.
-- Stanislaw J. Lec "We must view young people not as empty bottles to be filled but as candles to be lit." (Robert Shaffer) Personal Homepages
"What is the difference between exploring and being lost?" (Dan Eldon, photojournalist) Creativity is allowing oneself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which ones to keep.
-- Scott Adams, The Dilbert Principle Honor's a good brooch to wear in a man's hat at all times.
-- Jonson, Ben Of course, it is very important to be sober when you take an exam. Many worthwile careers in the
street-cleansing, fruit-picking and subway-guitar-playing industries have been founded on a lack
of u What do I dislike about death? Must be the hours.
-- Woody Allen Personal Homepages Imitation is the sincerest form of television.
-- Fred Allen Anyone nit-picking enough to write a letter of correction to an editor doubtless deserves the error
that provoked it.
-- Alvin Toffler Conservatives are not necessarily stupid, but most stupid people are conservatives.
-- John Stuart Mill Personal Homepages
May your wife be a witch who takes after her mother, and may you all live together in a one-room house. When nations grow old, the arts grow cold and commerce settles on every tree.
-- William Blake It is better to have a permanent income than to be fascinating.
-- Oscar Wilde Marriage is a great institution, but who wants to live in an institution?
-- Marx Groucho, the film "Animal Crackers" Even a band of angels can turn ugly and start looting if enough angels are unemployed and
hanging around the Pearly Gates convinced that all the succubi own all the liquor stores in
Heaven.
-- P. J Personal Homepages Church is only society on earth that exists for the benefit of non-members.
-- William Temple Coffee is a beverage that puts one to sleep when not drank.
-- Alphonse Allais The difference between marriage and death? Dead people are free. Personal Homepages
Wit is educated insolence.
- Aristotle The only thing worse than a man you can't control is a man you can.
-- Margo Kaufman The one thing that doesn't abide by majority rule is a person's conscience.
-- Harper Lee If excessive smoking actually plays a role in the production of lung cancer, it seems to be a minor
one.
-- Dr. W.C. Heuper of the National Cancer Institute, as quoted in the New York Times on Apri Integrity is what we do, what we say, and what we say we do.
--Don Galer Personal Homepages "Drugs have done a lot of good. A lot of good songs have been written. 'Penny Lane' is worth 10 dead kids. 'Dark Side of the Moon?' 100 dead kids. At least that many were conceived by people listening Marriage is like a hot bath. Once you get used to it, it's not so hot. Christianity has not been tried and found wanting; it has been found difficult and not tried.
-- G. K. Chesterton Personal Homepages
Most of our obstacles would melt away if, instead of cowering before them, we should make up
our minds to walk boldly through them.
-- Orison Swett Marden No one finds life worth living; he must make it worth living.
-- Anon. It is a miracle that curiosity survives formal education.
-- Albert Einstein Life is like music; it must be composed by ear, feeling, and instinct, not by rule.
-- Samuel Butler I don't know exactly what democracy is. But we need more of it.
-- Anonymous Chinese Student, during protests in Tianamen Square, Beijing, 1989 Personal Homepages If it is your time, love will track you down like a cruise missile.
-- Lynda Barry My wife says if I go fishing one more time she's going to leave me. Gosh, I'm going to miss her. "Use what talents you possess; The woods would be very silent if no birds sang there except those that sang best." (William Blake) Personal Homepages
Marriage is more than four bare legs in a bed.
-- Hoshang N. Akhtar If you want anything done well, do it yourself. This is why most people laugh at their own jokes.
-- Bob Edwards The marriage of Marxism and feminism has been like the marriage of husband and wife depicted in English common law: Marxism and feminism are one, and that one is Marxism. --Heidi Hartmann [The Unhappy I cannot teach anybody anything, I can only make them think.
-- Socrates In the early sixties, we were strong, we were virulent...
-- John Connally, Secretary of Treasury under Richard Nixon, in an early 70s speech, as reported
in a contemporary "American Scholar" Personal Homepages Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed.
- George Burns "There is only one success: to be able to spend your life in your own way, and not to give others absurd maddening claims upon it." (Christopher Darlington Morley) When you're experimenting you have to try so many things before you choose what you want,
and you may go days getting nothing but exhaustion.
-- Fred Astaire Personal Homepages
"What sculpture is to a block of marble, education is to a human soul." (Joseph Addison) Hegel was right when he said that we learn from history that man can never learn anything from
history.
-- George Bernard Shaw A man can't get rich if he takes proper care of his family.
-- Navaho saying "You know what charm is: a way of getting the answer yes without having asked any clear question." (Albert Camus, The Fall) Musical people always want one to be perfectly dumb at the very moment when one is longing to
be perfectly deaf.
-- Oscar Wilde Personal Homepages To read a writer is for me not merely to get an idea of what he says, but to go off with him and travel in his company.
Andre Gide Honor lies in honest toil.
-- Grover Cleveland Marriage is bliss. Ignorance is bliss. Ergo...
-- Anonymous Personal Homepages
My grandfather once told me that there are two kinds of people: those who work and those who
take the credit. He told me to try to be in the first group; there was less competition there.
-- INDIRA Never try to teach a pig to sing. It's a waste of your time and annoys the pig.
-- Anon. Happiness, it is said, is seldom found by those who seek it, and never by those who seek it for
themselves.
-- F. Emerson Andrews Propel, propel, propel your craft softly down liquid solution. Ecstatically, ecstatically, ecstatically,
ecstatically, Existence is simply illusion.
-- Fred Rogers, parody of "Row, row, row your boa The gods too are fond of a joke.
-- Aristotle Personal Homepages The most valuable of all talents is that of never using two words when one will do.
-- Thomas Jefferson Miracles occur naturally as expressions of love. The real miracle is the love that inspires them. In
this sense everything that comes from love is a miracle.
-- Marianne Williamson The most savage controversies are about those matters as to which there is no good evidence
either way.
-- Bertrand Russell Personal Homepages
Books, like friends, should be few and well chosen.
-- Samuel Paterson Change before you have to.
-- Jack Welch The backbone of surprise is fusing speed with secrecy.
- Von Clausewitz Well-timed silence hath more eloquence than speech.
- Martin Fraquhar Tupper War is a profession by which a man cannot live honorably; an employment by which the soldier, if
he would reap any profit, is obliged to be false, rapacious, and cruel.
-- Niccolo Machiavelli Personal Homepages Nothing average ever stood as a monument to progress. When progress is looking for a partner it
doesn't turn to those who believe they are only average. It turns instead to those who are forever
sea It is the final proof of God's omnipotence that he need not exist in order to save us.
-- Peter De Vries "May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house." (George Carlin) Personal Homepages
The right to swing my fist ends where the other man's nose begins.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he.
-- Proverbs 23:7 Abstract art: a product of the untalented sold by the unprincipled to the utterly bewildered.
-- Al Capp Beware you be not swallowed up in books! An ounce of love is worth a pound of knowledge.
-- John Wesley No other success can compensate for failure in the home.
-- David O. McKay, Encyclopedia of Mormonism, Advice to parents at General Conference of he
LDS Church, April, 1964 Personal Homepages "The hardest thing to learn in life is which bridge to cross and which to burn." (David Russell) Wise men make proverbs, but fools repeat them.
- Samuel Palmer Universities incline wits to sophistry and affectation.
-- Francis Bacon Personal Homepages
