The Official SKAMP Web Site - The latest information including SKAMP members' biographies, photos, MP3s, lyrics, discography, chat room, press releases.
To keep your marriage brimming, with love in the wedding cup, whenever you're wrong, admit it;
whenever you're right, shut up.
-- Ogden Nash Art consists of limitation. The most beautiful part of every picture is the frame.
-- G. K. Chesterton Not only is the universe stranger than we imagine, it is stranger than we can imagine.
Sir Arthur Eddington (1882 - 1944) It was very good of God to let Carlyle and Mrs Carlyle marry one another and so make only two people miserable instead of four, besides being very amusing. The hard part about being a bartender is figuring out who is drunk and who is just stupid.
-- Richard Braunstein Music Genius has somewhat of the infantine; But of the childish not a touch or taint.
-- Robert Browning The average person thinks he isn't.
- Father Larry Lorenzoni All I need to make a comedy is a park, a policeman and a pretty girl.
-- Charlie Chaplin Music
"Club Secretary: I say, Lawrence. You are a clown!
Lawrence: We can't all be lion tamers." (Thomas Edward Lawrence, Lawrence of Arabia, 1962) I don't even butter my bread; I consider that cooking.
-- Katherine Cebrian Laundry increases exponentially in the number of children.
-- Miriam Robbins If God had meant us to vote, He would have given us candidates.
-- Seen on a bumper sticker "It is not the answer that enlightens, but the question." (Eugene Ionesco) Music Democracy is a process by which the people are free to choose the man who will get the blame.
-- Laurence J. Peter I hate women because they always know where things are.
-- James Thurber Statistics are like a bikini. What they reveal is suggestive, but what they conceal is vital.
-- Aaron Levenstein Music
He didn't say that. He was reading what was given to him in a speech.
-- Richard Darman, director of OMB, explaining why President Bush wasn't following up on his
campaign pledge that there would be A true gentleman is one who is never unintentionally rude.
-- Oscar Wilde "It is easier to forgive an enemy than to forgive a friend." (William Blake) We know the truth, not only by the reason, but also by the heart.
-- Blaise Pascal, Thoughts, Chap. x. 1., Translated by O. W. Wight "Every act of creation is first an act of destruction." (Pablo Picasso) Music It's impossible to experience one's death objectively and still carry a tune.
-- Woody Allen There is no more lovely, friendly and charming relationship, communion or company than a good
marriage
-- Martin Luther All that is gold does not glitter. Not all those who wander are lost;
-- J.R.R. Tolkein Music
They will say you are on the wrong road, if it is your own.
-- Antonio Porchi If God did not exist, it would be necessary to invent him.
-- Voltaire The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about nothing -- and then marry him.
-- Cher If a man is talking in the forest, and there is no woman there to hear him, is he still wrong?
-- Jenny Weber You can pay attention to the fact, in which case you'll probably become a mathematician, or you
can ignore it, in which case you'll probably become a physicist.
-- Len Evans, professor, Northwestern Music Some people talk in their sleep. Lecturers talk while other people sleep.
-- Albert Camus "Eternal vigilance is the price of freedom." (Raymonde Uy) Nuns: Women who marry God. If they divorce Him, do they get half the universe? Music
Whether you think that you can, or that you can't, you are usually right.
-- Henry Ford The only weapon that becomes sharper with constant use is the tongue.
-- Anonymous "Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot, nothing is going to get better. It's not." (Theodor Seuss Geisel, a.k.a. Dr. Seuss, 1904-1991) We can lick gravity, but sometimes the paperwork is overwhelming.
-- Wehrner von Braun People need loving the most when they deserve it the least.
-- John Harrigan Music Men have become the tools of their tools.
-- Henry David Thoreau Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It's the transition that's troublesome.
- Isaac Asimov "In the End, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends." (Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.) Music
The principle of give and take is the principle of diplomacy - give one and take ten.
-- Mark Twain No man is good enough to govern another man without that other's consent.
-- Abraham Lincoln A man can't get rich if he takes proper care of his family.
-- Navaho saying "God is a gentleman. He prefers blondes." (Joe Orton, Loot) "Bread feeds the body, indeed, but flowers feed also the soul." (The Prophet Mohammad) Music I told my wife that a husband is like a fine wine; he gets better with age. The next day, she locked
me in the cellar.
-- Anonymous We can do not great things - only small things with great love.
-- Mother Theresa "Discipline is the bridge between goals and accomplishments." (Anonymous) Music
I hate mankind, for I think myself to be one of them, and I know how bad I am.
-- Samuel Johnson One cannot think well, love well, sleep well, if one has not dined well.
-- Virginia Woolf "Freedom of press is limited to those who own one." (Henry Louis Mencken) Self-reliance is the only road to true freedom, and being one's own person is its ultimate reward.
-- Patricia Sampson Ah, well, then I suppose I shall have to die beyond my means.
-- Oscar Wilde, dying words Music Forgive your enemies, but never forget their names.
-- John F. Kennedy "The want of logic annoys. Too much logic bores. Life eludes logic, and everything that logic alone constructs remains artificial and forced." (André Gide) He who laughs last has not yet heard the bad news.
-- Bertolt Brecht Music
blah "You can lead a man to Congress, but you can't make him think." (Milton Berle) "Hold the fort! I am coming!" (General William Tecumseh Sherman) If you can't sleep, then get up and do something instead of lying there and worrying. It's the worry
that gets you, not the loss of sleep.
-- Dale Carnegie A memorandum is written not to inform the reader but to protect the writer.
-- Dean Acheson Great innovations should not be forced on slender majorities.
-- Thomas Jefferson Music My mother-in-law broke up my marriage. My wife came home from work one day and found me in
bed with her.
-- Lenny Bruce "Be not afraid of greatness. Some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some have greatness thrust upon 'em." (William Shakespeare, Twelfth Night, II:5) Everything is drive-through. In California, they even have a burial service called Jump-In-The-
Box.
-- Wil Shriner Music
When I give a lecture, I accept that people look at their watches, but what I do not tolerate is
when they look at it and raise it to their ear to find out if it stopped.
-- Marcel Achard All courage is a form of constancy. It is always himself that a coward abandons first. After this all
other betrayals come.
-- Cormac McCarthy During the first period of a man's life the greatest danger is not to take the risk.
-- Soren Kierkegaard The difference between fiction and reality? Fiction has to make sense.
-- Tom Clancy I do not like broccoli. And I haven't liked it since I was a little kid and my mother made me eat it.
And I'm President of the United States and I'm not going to eat any more broccoli.
-- George Bus Music "How wondrous familiar is a fool!" (Herman Melville, Moby Dick) Those parts of the system that you can hit with a hammer (not advised) are called hardware;
those program instructions that you can only curse at are called software.
-- Unknown author, Levitating T In all recorded history there has not been one economist who has had to worry about where the
next meal would come from.
-- Peter F. Drucker Music
All women are born evil. Some just realize their potential later in life than others.
-- Chad A. Gamble, Escape, short story Tauzin backs term limits -- But he thinks it's a bad idea.
-- Headline, story in the New Orleans Times-Picayune, Feb 20, 1995 I was a pilot flying an airplane and it just so happened that where I was flying made what I was
doing spying.
-- Francis Gary Power, U-2 reconnaissance pilot held by the Soviets for spying, in an i We never live; we are always in the expectation of living.
-- Voltaire Author: A fool, who, not content with having bored those who have lived with him, insists on
tormenting the generations to come.
-- Montesquieu Music "The only real mistake is the one from which we learn nothing." (John Powell) "Education is the process of driving a set of prejudices down your throat." (Martin H. Fischer) We in the industry know that behind every successful screenwriter stands a woman. And behind her stands his wife. -- Groucho Marx Music
"Ninety percent of my salary I spent on booze and women ... and the other ten percent I wasted." (Tug McGraw, Major League Baseball pitcher) When a person can no longer laugh at himself, it is time for others to laugh at him.
-- Thomas Szasz, The Second Sin, 1973 blah bl "Less is more." (Robert Browning) If it weren't for electricity we'd all be watching television by candlelight.
-- George Gobel What is life? It is the flash of a firefly in the night. It is the breath of a buffalo in the wintertime. It is
the little shadow which runs across the grass and loses itself in the sunset.
-- Crowf Music A human being is a part of the whole, called by us Universe, a part limited in time and space. He
experiences himself, his thoughts and feelings as something separated from the rest--a kind of
optic "Liberty means responsibility. That is why most men dread it." (George Bernard Shaw) The greatest discovery of my generation is that human beings can alter their lives by altering their
attitudes of mind.
-- William James Music
