Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe.
-- Jackie Mason "I'll tell you something: Luxury disgusts me." (Giorgio Armani) An economist is a man who states the obvious in terms of the incomprehensible.
-- Alfred A. Knopf "Gifts must affect the receiver to the point of shock." (Walter Benjamin) "He who speaks of what he knows not only works hard to portray his ignorance." (Joseph Muchemi) San Lawrenz Washington is a city of Southern efficiency and Northern charm.
-- John F. Kennedy Democracy is a form of government in which it is permitted to wonder aloud what the country
could do under first-class management.
-- Senator Soaper Discovery consists of looking at the same thing as everyone else does and thinking something
different.
-- Albert Szent-Gyorgyi, 1937 Nobel Prize in Physiology and Medicine San Lawrenz
"Small minds discuss people, average minds discuss events, great minds discuss ideas." (Anonymous) If ever two were one, then surely we.
If ever man were loved by wife, then thee.
-- Anne Bradstreet I skate to where the puck is going to be, not to where it has been.
-- Wayne Gretzky "Give me liberty or give me death." (Patrick Henry) [You reporters] should have printed what he meant, not what he said.
-- Earl Bush, press aide to Richard Daley San Lawrenz The IRS spends God knows how much of your tax money on these toll-free information hot lines
staffed by IRS employees, whose idea of a dynamite tax tip is that you should print neatly. If you
ask th How many legs does a dog have if you call the tail a leg? Four. Calling a tail a leg doesn't make it
a leg.
-- Abraham Lincoln I'm proud to be paying taxes in the United States. The only thing is - I could be just as proud for
half the money.
-- Arthur Godfrey San Lawrenz
One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief that one's work is
terribly important.
- Bertrand Russell
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A little inaccuracy sometimes saves a ton Marriage is an adventure, like going to war.
-- G. K. Chesterton "I am a part of all that I have met." (Alfred Lord Tennyson, 1809-1892, English poet) Never try to teach a pig to sing. It wastes your time and annoys the pig.
-- Anonymous There are times when parenthood seems nothing but feeding the mouth that bites you.
-- Peter De Vries San Lawrenz Good teaching is one-fourth preparation and three-fourths theater.
-- Gail Godwin the social sciences were for all those who had not yet decided what to do with their lives, and for
all those whose premature frustrations led them into the sterile alleys of confrontation.
-- Peter The true measure of a man is how he treats someone who can do him absolutely no good.
- Samuel Johnson San Lawrenz
See what will happen if you don't stop biting your fingernails?
-- Will Rogers, to his niece on seeing the Venus de Milo It's important to be open-minded, but not SO open-minded that your brains fall out.
-- Rick Radebaugh You are educated when you have the ability to listen to almost anything without losing your
temper or self-confidence.
-- Robert Frost When I am working on a problem I never think about beauty. I only think about how to solve the
problem. But when I have finished, if the solution is not beautiful, I know it is wrong.
- Buckminster "It wasn't until I started reading and found books they wouldn't let us read in school that I discovered you could be insane and happy and have a good life without being like everybody else." (John W San Lawrenz The grand aim of all science is to cover the greatest number of empirical facts by logical
deduction from the smallest number of hypotheses or axioms.
-- Albert Einstein Marriage means commitment. Of course, so does insanity. "In order to preserve your self-respect, it is sometimes necessary to lie and cheat." (Robert Byrne) San Lawrenz
I am in total control, but don't tell my wife. Fine art and pizza delivery: what we do falls neatly in between.
-- David Letterman If you can't sleep, then get up and do something instead of lying there and worrying. It's the worry
that gets you, not the loss of sleep.
-- Dale Carnegie He who kisses the joy is it flies lives in eternity's sunrise
-- William Blake Everything is drive-through. In California, they even have a burial service called Jump-In-The-
Box.
-- Wil Shriner San Lawrenz Good friends are good for your health.
-- Irwin Sarason Nothing says loving like marrying your cousin! -- Al Bundy Idealism increases in direct proportion to one's distance from the problem.
-- John Galsworthy San Lawrenz
"The last Christian died on the cross." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Each of us has a spark of life inside us, and our highest endeavor ought to be to set off that spark
in one another.
-- Kenny Ausubel Actually, the only memory I have of being a Cub Scout was trying to get my hat back. That was all
I did. Run back and forth at my bus stop going "Quit it."
-- Jerry Seinfeld History is the version of past events that people have decided to agree upon.
-- Napoleon Bonaparte Once is happenstance. Twice is coincidence. Three times is enemy action.
- Auric Goldfinger, in Goldfinger by Ian L. Fleming San Lawrenz "Whether it is a black cat or a white cat, as long as it can catch the rat, it is a good cat." (Deng Xiao Ping) Friends applaud, the Comedy is over.
-- Ludwig von Beethoven, dying words Some people go to priests; others to poetry; I to my friends.
-- Virginia Woolf, Bernard, in The Waves, 1931; repr. 1943, p. 189 San Lawrenz
Love me or hate me, but spare me your indifference.
-- Libbie Fudim If you can count your money, you don't have a billion dollars.
- J. Paul Getty I shall return.
-- General Douglas MacArthur Love is stronger than justice.
-- Sting A clever man commits no minor blunders.
- Goethe San Lawrenz He who has lost honor can lose nothing more.
-- Publilius Syrus A good marriage is at least 80 percent good luck in finding the right person at the right time. The
rest is trust.
-- Nanette Newman, British actress "Children spell love...T-I-M-E." (Dr. Anthony P. Witham) San Lawrenz
For I am a bear of very little brain and long words bother me.
-- Winnie the Pooh, character from author A. A. Milne You have to walk carefully in the beginning of love; the running across fields into your lover's
arms can only come later when you're sure they won't laugh if you trip.
-- Jonathan Carroll, Outside I'm living so far beyond my income that we may almost be said to be living apart.
- e e cummings It is not good enough to have a good mind; the main thing is to use it well.
-- Rene Descartes "Good taste is the first refuge of the non-creative. It is the last-ditch stand of the artist." (Marshall McLuhan) San Lawrenz "How wondrous familiar is a fool!" (Herman Melville, Moby Dick) The man who reads nothing at all is better educated than the man who reads nothing but
newspapers.
-- Thomas Jefferson Let the refining and improving of your own life keep you so busy that you have little time to
criticize others.
-- H. Jackson Brown San Lawrenz
Abstract art: a product of the untalented sold by the unprincipled to the utterly bewildered.
-- Al Capp "Of all mankind the great poet is the equable man." (Walt Whitman, Leaves of Grass, 1855) The crime bill passed by the Senate would reinstate the Federal death penalty for certain violent
crimes: assassinating the President; hijacking an airliner; and murdering a government poultry
inspe Never tell. Not if you love your wife... In fact, if your old lady walks in on you, deny it. Yeah. Just
flat out and she'll believe it: "I'm tellin' ya. This chick came downstairs with a sign around People, like nails, lose their effectiveness when they lose direction and begin to bend.
-- Walter Savage Landor San Lawrenz When making public policy decisions about new technologies for the Government, I think one
should ask oneself which technologies would best strengthen the hand of a police state. Then, do
not allow No man in the world has more courage than the man who can stop after eating one peanut.
-- Channing Pollack Life does not cease to be funny when people die any more than it ceases to be serious when
people laugh.
-- George Bernard Shaw San Lawrenz
Who controls the past controls the future. Who controls the present controls the past.
-- George Orwell I admire the serene assurance of those who have religious faith. It is wonderful to observe the
calm confidence of a Christian with four aces.
-- Mark Twain I don't want everyone to like me; I should think less of myself if some people did.
-- Henry James "Those who hear not the music think the dancers mad." (Anonymous) Never moon a werewolf.
-- Mike Binder San Lawrenz Love is what we are born with. Fear is what we learn. The spiritual journey is the unlearning of
fear and prejudices and the acceptance of love back in our hearts. Love is the essential reality
and I'm worried that the universe will soon need replacing. It's not holding a charge.
-- Edward Chilton Being on the tightrope is living; everything else is waiting.
-- Karl Wallenda San Lawrenz
I still say a church steeple with a lightning rod on top shows a lack of confidence.
-- Doug MacLeod Action springs not from thought, but from a readiness for responsibility.
-- Dietrich Bonhoeffer Everything should be made as simple as possible, but not simpler.
-- Albert Einstein The most wasted day of all is that in which we have not laughed.
-- Sebastian Roch Nicolas Chamfort "The fact that an opinion has been widely held is no evidence whatever that it is not utterly absurd." (Bertrand Arthur William Russell, 1872-1970) San Lawrenz Be willing to make decisions. That's the most important quality in a good leader. Don't fall victim
to what I call the 'ready-aim-aim-aim-aim syndrome.' You must be willing to fire.
-- Gen. George Marriage is a romance in which the heroine dies in the first chapter.
-- Cecilia Egan They were doing a full back shot of me in a swimsuit and I thought, Oh my God, I have to be so
brave. See, every woman hates herself from behind.
-- Cindy Crawford, supermodel San Lawrenz
