Better watch out that you won't become a television set in your next life.
--Loesje Don't anthropomorphize computers -- they hate it.
-- Anonymous I am beginning to suspect all elaborate and special systems of education. They seem to me to be
built upon the supposition that every child is a kind of idiot who must be taught to think.
-- Anne S I tried a mail order bride, once, but she was damaged in the mail, and I had to return the unused part for my full refund. "When once you have tasted flight you will always walk the earth with your eyes turned skyward: for there you have been and there you will always be." (Henry Van Dyke) Law "Fools rush in where angels fear to tread." (Alexander Pope) Until the day of his death, no man can be sure of his courage.
-- Jean Anouilh Patriotism is the last refuge of the scoundrel.
-- Samuel Johnson Law
He can compress the most words into the smallest idea of any man I know.
- Abraham Lincoln Men. You can't live with them. You don't have to.
-- Seen on a t-shirt "I would rather be exposed to the inconveniences attending too much liberty than to those attending too small a degree of it." (Thomas Jefferson, to Archibald Stuart, 1791) Love is what happens to men and women who don't know each other.
-- W. Somerset Maugham "Conform and be dull." (J. Frank Doble) Law Life does not cease to be funny when people die any more than it ceases to be serious when
people laugh.
-- George Bernard Shaw I would venture to guess that Anon, who wrote so many poems without signing them, was often a
woman.
-- Virginia Woolf Love means to love that which is unlovable; or it is no virtue at all.
-- G. K. Chesterton Law
"Commit yourself to quality from day one ... it's better to do nothing at all than to do something badly." (Mark McCormack) A woman's always younger than a man of equal years.
-Elizabeth Barrett Browning, Aurora Leigh In any organization there will always be one person who knows what is going on. This person
must be fired.
-- Conway's Law Computers will not be perfected until they can compute how much more than the estimate the job
will cost.
-- Anon I envy people who drink -- at least they know what to blame everything on.
-- Oscar Levant Law I do not have much patience with a thing of beauty that must be explained to be understood. If it
does need additional interpretation by someone other than the creator, then I question whether it
ha Good friends are good for your health.
-- Irwin Sarason Love is like the measles. The older you get it, the worse the attack.
-- Mary Roberts Rhinehart Law
"To make a living, craftiness is better than learnedness." (Pierre-Augustin de Beaumarchais) "Thanks to my solid academic training, today I can write hundreds of words on virtually any topic without possessing a shred of information, which is how I got a good job in journalism." (Dave Barry) The work of internal government has become the task of controlling the thousands of fifth-rate
men.
-- Henry B. Adams Your every voter, as surely as your chief magistrate, exercises a public trust.
-- Grover Cleveland "Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot, nothing is going to get better. It's not." (Theodor Seuss Geisel, a.k.a. Dr. Seuss, 1904-1991) Law Humanity has advanced, when it has advanced, not because it has been sober, responsible, and
cautious, but because it has been playful, rebellious, and immature.
-- Tom Robbins That men do not learn very much from the lessons of history is the most important of all the
lessons that history has to teach.
-- Aldous Huxley Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life.
-- Brooke Shields, during an interview to become spokesperson for a federal anti-smoking
campaign Law
I figure you have the same chance of winning the lottery whether you play or not.
-- Fran Lebowitz The most terrible poverty is loneliness and the feeling of being unloved.
-- Mother Teresa If God wanted women to understand men, football would never have been created.
-- Seen on a bumper sticker "A celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to become well known, then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized." (Fred Allen) To keep your marriage brimming, with love in the wedding cup, whenever you're wrong, admit it;
whenever you're right, shut up.
-- Ogden Nash Law A university professor set an examination question in which he asked what is the difference
between ignorance and apathy. The professor had to give an A+ to a student who answered: I
don't know and Learn to laugh at your troubles and you'll never run out of things to laugh at.
-- Lyn Karol Every act of creation is first an act of destruction.
-- Pablo Picasso Law
Democracy is a form of government in which it is permitted to wonder aloud what the country
could do under first-class management.
-- Senator Soaper Never moon a werewolf.
-- Mike Binder "I do not agree with what you have to say, but I'll defend to the death your right to say it." (Francois Marie Arouet Voltaire, 1694-1778) We love because it's the only true adventure.
-- Nikki Giovanni Seek the lofty by reading, hearing and seeing great work at some moment every day.
-- Thornton Wilder Law Being in therapy is great. I spend an hour just talking about myself. It's kinda like being the guy on
a date.
-- Caroline Rhea A clever man commits no minor blunders.
- Goethe Whatever is begun in anger ends in shame.
- Benjamin Franklin Law
"Nothing has been purchased more dearly than the little bit of reason and sense of freedom which now constitutes our pride." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Generations to come will find it difficult to believe that a man such as Gandhi ever walked the
face of this earth.
-- Albert Einstein A beauty is a woman you notice; A charmer is one who notices you.
-- Adlai Stevenson Be like a postage stamp. Stick to one thing until you get there.
-- Josh Billings Minds are like parachutes - they only function when open.
-- Thomas Dewar Law There is no course of life so weak and sottish as that which is managed by order, method, and
discipline.
-- Michel de Montaigne The work of internal government has become the task of controlling the thousands of fifth-rate
men.
-- Henry B. Adams It is not because it is difficult that we do not dare; it is because we do not dare that things are
difficult.
-- Lucius Anneaus Seneca Law
"Man is a strange animal. He generally cannot read the handwriting on the wall until his back is up against it." (Adlai Stevenson) Good hours, excellent pay, fun place to work, paid training, mean boss. Oh well, four out of five
isn't bad.
-- Help Wanted Ad, PA newspaper, 1994 Sometimes I wonder if men and women really suit each other. Perhaps they should live next door
and just visit now and then.
-- Katharine Hepburn The ability to quote is a serviceable substitute for wit.
-- W. Somerset Maugham "Posterity: you will never know how much it has cost my generation to preserve your freedom. I hope you will make good use of it." (John Quincy Adams) Law "The trouble with the world is that the stupid are cocksure and the intelligent are full of doubt." (Bertrand Arthur William Russell, 1872-1970) "Children begin by loving their parents. After a time they judge them. Rarely, if ever, do they forgive them." (Oscar Wilde, A Woman of No Importance) Give her two red roses, each with a note. The first note says "For the woman I love" and the
second, "For my best friend."
-- Anonymous Law
"Great spirits have always faced voilent protest from mediocre minds." (Albert Einstein) Fill the unforgiving minute with sixty seconds worth of distance run.
- Rudyard Kipling "The feminists used to say that chivalry and ladyhood were ways of keeping women down and preventing them from standing toe to toe with the guys. Now you've got a lot of women saying that if a guy is Television: A medium. So called because it is neither rare nor well done.
-- Ernie Kovacs Love is the wisdom of the fool and the folly of the wise.
-- Samuel Johnson Law The best teacher is the one who suggests rather than dogmatizes, and inspires his listener with
the wish to teach himself.
-- Edward Bulwer-Lytton Once the realization is accepted that even between the closest human beings infinite distances
continue to exist, a wonderful living side by side can grow up, if they succeed in loving the
distance "Do not go gentle into that good night. Old age should burn and rave at close of day. Rage, rage against the dying of the light." (Dylan Thomas) Law
Honor's a good brooch to wear in a man's hat at all times.
-- Jonson, Ben Sir, I would rather be right than be President.
-- Henry Clay, Speech, 1850, referring to the Compromise Measure "If all men knew what others say of them, there would not be four friends in the world." (Blaise Pascal) We must believe in free will, we have no choice.
-- Isaac B. Singer I have noticed that nothing I have never said ever did me any harm.
-- Calvin Coolidge Law Fashion is a form of ugliness so intolerable that we have to alter it every six months.
-- Oscar Wilde "No drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of society. If we're looking for the source of our troubles, we shouldn't test people for drugs, we should test them for stupidity, ignorance, g "I expect nothing. I fear no one. I am free." (Nikos Kazantzakis) Law
The backbone of surprise is fusing speed with secrecy.
- Von Clausewitz We never live; we are always in the expectation of living.
-- Voltaire Always do right; this will gratify some people and astonish the rest.
-- Mark Twain A girl must marry for love and keep on marrying until she finds it.
-- Zsa Zsa Gabor The most valuable of all talents is that of never using two words when one will do.
-- Thomas Jefferson Law The best time to hold your tongue is the time you feel you must say something or bust.
-- Josh Billings A friend is a gift you give yourself.
-- Robert Louis Stevenson The person who is slowest in making a promise is most faithful in its performance.
-- Jean-Jacques Rousseau Law
