Faith is believing what you know ain't so.
-- Mark Twain "I love Los Angeles. I love Hollywood. They're beautiful. Everybody's plastic, but I love plastic. I want to be plastic." (Andy Warhol, Holy Terror: Andy Warhol Close Up) "Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution yet." (Mae West) Everything should be made as simple as possible, but not simpler.
-- Albert Einstein "There is only one thing more painful than learning from experience and that is not learning from experience." (Archibald McLeish) Foreign If you never want to see a man again, say, "I love you, I want to marry you, I want to have children..." - they leave skid marks. -- Rita Rudner We had a lot in common. I loved him and he loved him.
-- Shelley Winters I married beneath me. All women do.
-- Lady Nancy Astor, attributed Foreign
A man who marries a woman to educate her falls a victim to the same fallacy as the woman who
marries a man to reform him.
-- Elbert Hubbard "The order of the world is always right - such is the judgment of God. For God has departed, but he has left his judgment behind, the way the Cheshire Cat left his grin." (Jean Baudrillard) It's not whether you get knocked down, it's whether you get back up.
-- Vince Lombardi It was a day like this Marco Polo left for China. What are your plans for today?
--Loesje Thank heaven. A bachelor's life is no life for a single man.
-- Samuel Goldwyn, immigrant-turned-famous-movie-producer, when told his son was getting
married Foreign He who kisses the joy is it flies lives in eternity's sunrise
-- William Blake ... it is certain that the real function of art is to increase our self-consciousness; to make us more
aware of what we are, and therefore of what the universe in which we live really is. And since
The whole art of teaching is only the art of awakening the natural curiosity of young minds for the
purpose of satisfying it afterwards.
-- Anatole France Foreign
Everything that can be invented has been invented.
- Charles H. Duell, Commissioner, U.S. Office of Patents, 1899 Prayer gives a man the opportunity of getting to know a gentleman he hardly ever meets. I do not
mean his maker, but himself.
-- Dean Inge "I would rather be exposed to the inconveniences attending too much liberty than to those attending too small a degree of it." (Thomas Jefferson, to Archibald Stuart, 1791) "Education is the period during which you are being instructed by somebody you do not know, about something you do not want to know." (Gilbert Keith Chesterton) Sir Francis Drake circumsized the world with a 100-foot clipper.
-- Unknown history student Foreign Whenever I'm caught between two evils, I take the one I've never tried.
-- Mae West I shall return.
-- General Douglas MacArthur A scholar who cherishes the love of comfort is not fit to be deemed a scholar.
- Lao-Tzu Foreign
"No person was ever honored for what he received. Honor has been the reward for what he gave." (Calvin Coolidge) They had a dispute about a night out with the boys. But he finally decided to let her go.
-- Anonymous I never miss a chance to have sex or appear on television.
-- Gore Vidal blah "If we did all the things we are capable of, we would literally astound ourselves." (Thomas Alva Edison) My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a
philosopher.
- Socrates Foreign Basically, I no longer work for anything but the sensation I have while working.
- Albert Giacometti (sculptor) You have to stay in shape. My grandmother, she started walking five miles a day when she was
60. She's 97 today and we don't know where the hell she is.
-- Ellen DeGeneres The most wasted day of all is that in which we have not laughed.
-- Sebastian Roch Nicolas Chamfort Foreign
You have to walk carefully in the beginning of love; the running across fields into your lover's
arms can only come later when you're sure they won't laugh if you trip.
-- Jonathan Carroll, Outside The wit of a graduate student is like champagne. Canadian champagne.
-- Robertson Davies I've been trying desperately to save my marriage for the last 35 years. I belong to Bridegrooms Anonymous. Whenever I feel like getting married, they send over a lady in a housecoat and hair curlers to burn my toast for me. -- Dick Martin Whining is not only graceless, but can be dangerous. It can alert a brute that a victim is in the
neighborhood.
-- Maya Angelou Foreign In endowing us with memory, nature has revealed to us a truth utterly unimaginable to the
unreflective creation, the truth of immortality....The most ideal human passion is love, which is
also the m Great eaters and great sleepers are incapable of anything else that is great.
-- William Shakespeare, Henry IV I never think of the future - it comes soon enough.
-- Albert Einstein Foreign
"The only way to have friends is to be one." (Ralph Waldo Emerson) "Pleasant words are a honeycomb, Sweet to the soul and healing to the bones." (Bible, Proverbs 16:24) Nothing says lovin' like marrying your cousin!
-- Al Bundy, character on "Married with Children," U.S. television show One can survive everything, nowadays, except death, and live down everything except a good
reputation.
-- Oscar Wilde Success usually comes to those who are too busy to be looking for it
- Henry David Thoreau Foreign There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called
marriage.
-- James Holt McGavran It is always incomprehensible to a man that a woman should ever refuse an offer of marriage.
-- Jane Austen When we do the best that we can, we never know what miracle is wrought in our life, or in the life
of another.
-- Helen Keller Foreign
"I would rather be exposed to the inconveniences attending too much liberty than to those attending too small a degree of it." (Thomas Jefferson, to Archibald Stuart, 1791) "Fools rush in where angels fear to tread." (Alexander Pope) To be able to say how much love, is love but little.
-- Petrarch Being in therapy is great. I spend an hour just talking about myself. It's kinda like being the guy on
a date.
-- Caroline Rhea The Churches must learn humility as well as teach it.
-- George Bernard Shaw, St. Joan Foreign MARRIAGE, n. The state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress and two
slaves, making in all, two.
-- Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, 1911 If you do not tell the truth about yourself you cannot tell it about other people.
-- Virginia Woolf The majority of husbands remind me of an orangutan trying to play the violin.
-- Honore de Balzac Foreign
Anyway, no drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of society. If we're looking for the
source of our troubles, we shouldn't test people for drugs, we should test them for stupidity,
ign The average Ph.D thesis is nothing but the transference of bones from one graveyard to another.
-- Frank J. Dobie, A Texan in England, 1945 The trouble with children is that they are not returnable.
-- Quentin Crisp The two most common elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity. But not in that order.
-- Brian Pickrell "Use what talents you possess; The woods would be very silent if no birds sang there except those that sang best." (William Blake) Foreign Worrying is like a rocking chair, it gives you something to do, but it doesn't get you anywhere.
-- Anonymous blah "Some of the worlds greatest feats were accomplished by people not smart enough to know they were impossible. unattributed" (Anonymous) "Talent does what it can; genius does what it must." (Edward Robert Bulwer-Lytton) Foreign
I was a pilot flying an airplane and it just so happened that where I was flying made what I was
doing spying.
-- Francis Gary Power, U-2 reconnaissance pilot held by the Soviets for spying, in an i Men are strong only so long as they represent a strong idea. They become powerless when they
oppose it.
-- Sigmund Freud The gods too are fond of a joke.
- Aristotle "I've never let my school interfere with my education." (Mark Twain) I went into a McDonald's yesterday and said, "I'd like some fries." The girl at the counter said,
"Would you like some fries with that?"
-- Jay Leno Foreign We have children because we want immortality and this is the most reliable way of getting it.
-- Woodrow Wyatt War is a profession by which a man cannot live honorably; an employment by which the soldier, if
he would reap any profit, is obliged to be false, rapacious, and cruel.
-- Niccolo Machiavelli Where there is marriage without love, there will be love without marriage.
-- Benjamin Franklin Foreign
Chance is always powerful. - Let your hook be always cast; in the pool where you least expect it,
there will be a fish.
-- Ovid Never try to teach a pig to sing. It's a waste of your time and annoys the pig.
-- Anon. "A man who flies from his fear may find he has only taken a shortcut to meet it." (John Ronald Reuel Tolkien) Do not fear to be eccentric in opinion, for every opinion now accepted was once eccentric.
-- Bertrand Russell "Ninety percent of my salary I spent on booze and women ... and the other ten percent I wasted." (Tug McGraw, Major League Baseball pitcher) Foreign Give the people not hell, but hope and courage.
-- John Murray Sleep is that golden chain that ties health and our bodies together.
-- Thomas Dekker This country has come to feel the same when Congress is in session as when the baby gets hold
of a hammer.
-- Will Rogers Foreign
The democratic theory is that if you accumulate enough ignorance at the polls, you produce
intelligence.
-- Philo Vance Virtue is like health: the harmony of the whole man.
-- Thomas Carlyle The closer I'm bound in love to you, the closer I am to free.
-- Indigo Girls, song lyric LOVE, n. A temporary insanity curable by marriage or by removal of the patient from the
influences under which he incurred the disorder... It is sometimes fatal, but more frequently to the
physician blah "This is the hardest of all: to close the open hand out of love, and keep modest as a giver." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Foreign In a cat's eyes, all things belong to cats.
-- English Proverb If we do not maintain Justice, Justice will not maintain us.
-- Francis Bacon This is the fourth?
-- Thomas Jefferson, dying words Foreign
