The eyes are not responsible when the mind does the seeing.
-- Publilius Syrus Martyrdom... is the only way in which a man can become famous without ability. George Bernard
Shaw (1856 - 1950), The Devil's Disciple (1901) act 3 "It seems to me that there are two kinds of trickery: the 'fronts' people assume before one another's eyes, and the 'front' a writer puts on the face of reality." (Francois Sagan) "If you want to get laid, go to college. If you want an education, go to the library." (Frank Zappa) Ah Mozart! He was happily married - but his wife wasn't. -- Borge Regions I would have made a good Pope.
-- Richard Nixon, U.S. President "The depth and strength of a human character are defined by its moral reserves. People reveal themselves completely only when they are thrown out of the customary conditions of their life, for only th Well-timed silence hath more eloquence than speech.
- Martin Fraquhar Tupper Regions
"All that we see or seem is but a dream within a dream." (Edger Allen Poe) Dignity does not consist in possessing honors, but in deserving them.
-- Aristotle There is one thing stronger than all the armies in the world; and that is an idea whose time has
come.
-- Victor Hugo He who knows nothing, knows nothing. But he who knows he knows nothing knows something. And he who knows someone whose friend's wife's brother knows nothing, he knows something. Or something like that University politics are vicious precisely because the stakes are so small.
- Henry Kissinger Regions It's impossible to experience one's death objectively and still carry a tune.
-- Woody Allen Look at life through the windshield, not the rear-view mirror.
-- Byrd Baggett Mathematics transfigures the fortuitous concourse of atoms into the tracery of the finger of God.
-- Herbert Westren Turnbull Regions
"What is tolerance? -- it is the consequence of humanity. We are all formed of frailty and error; let us pardon reciprocally each other's folly -- that is the first law of nature." (Francois Marie Ar Computers can figure out all kinds of problems, except the things in the world that just don't add
up.
-- Anon Even overweight cats instinctively know the cardinal rule: when fat, arrange yourself in slim
poses.
-- John Weitz, American Designer "The man who never made a mistake never made anything." (Derek Longdon, Tongariro Power Development, Turangi, New Zealand) I am about to--or I am going to--die; either expression is used.
-- Dominique Bouhours, French grammarian, dying words Regions You probably wouldn't worry about what people think of you if you could know how seldom they
do.
-- Olin Miller A Code of Honor: Never approach a friend's girlfriend or wife with mischief as your goal. There
are just too many women in the world to justify that sort of dishonorable behavior. Unless she's
reall Winning is a habit. Unfortunately, so is losing.
-- Vince Lombardi Regions
Based on what you know about him in history books, what do you think Abraham Lincoln would
be doing if he were alive today?
1) Writing his memoirs of the Civil War.
2) Advising the President.
3) D "I'll endorse with my name any of the following; clothing AC-DC, cigarettes, small tapes, sound equipment, ROCK N' ROLL RECORDS, anything, film, and film equipment, Food, Helium, Whips, MONEY!!" (And Here's a toast to your new bride who has everything a girl could want in her life, except for good
taste in men!
-- Wedding Toast "If liberty means anything at all, it means the right to tell people what they don't want to hear." (George Orwell) All that we see or seem is but a dream within a dream.
-- Edgar Allan Poe Regions Mathematicians are like Frenchmen: whatever you say to them they translate into their own
language and forthwith it is something entirely different.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe Working mothers are guinea pigs in a scientific experiment to show that sleep is not necessary to human life. Republican boys date Democratic girls. They plan to marry Republican girls, but feel they're entitled to a little fun first. Regions
blah "There is a melancholy that stems from greatness." (Sébastien-Roch Nicolas Chamfort, 1740/41-1794) I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like
toxic waste.
-- David Bissonette Most rock journalism is people who can't write interviewing people who can't talk for people who
can't read.
-- Frank Zappa "I expect nothing. I fear no one. I am free." (Nikos Kazantzakis) "It is awfully easy to be hard-boiled about everything in the daytime, but at night it is another thing." (Ernest Hemingway, The Sun Also Rises) Regions Harpo, she's a lovely person. She deserves a good husband. Marry her before she finds one.
-- Oscar Levant, to Harpo Marx upon meeting Harpo's fiancee "Self confidence is the first requisite to great undertakings." (Samuel Johnson) The right to swing my fist ends where the other man's nose begins.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes Regions
"The most instructive experiences are those of everyday life." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Trouble is a part of your life, and if you don't share it, you don't give the person that loves you
enough chance to love you enough.
-- Dinah Shore Reality is nothing but a collective hunch.
-- Lily Tomlin The greatest test of courage on earth is to bear defeat without losing heart.
-- Robert G. Ingersoll I've been asked to say a couple of words about my husband, Fang. How about "short" and
"cheap"?
-- Phyllis Diller Regions There are two means of refuge from the misery of life - music and cats.
-- Albert Schweitzer I would have made a good Pope.
-- Richard Nixon, U.S. President Forgive your enemies, but never forget their names.
-- John F. Kennedy Regions
Faith is believing what you know ain't so.
-- Mark Twain Why do grandparents and grandchildren get along so well? They have the same enemy-- the
mother.
-- Claudette Colbert When ideas fail, words come in very handy.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.
-- Seen on a bumper sticker "He who can, does. He who cannot, teaches." (George Bernard Shaw) Regions If you want to sacrifice the admiration of many men for the criticism of one, go ahead, get
married.
-- Katharine Hepburn "The market is not an invention of capitalism. It has existed for centuries. It is an invention of civilization." (Mikhail Gorbachev, June 8, 1990) The man with the best job in the country is the Vice President. All he has to do is get up every
morning and say, "How's the President?"
-- Will Rogers Regions
Why is it that our memory is good enough to retain the least triviality that happens to us, and yet
not good enough to recollect how often we have told it to the same person?
-- François de La Rouch Never look at the trombones. You'll only encourage them.
-- Richard Strauss, on conducting Spinster: A bachelor's wife. Prejudice is the child of ignorance.
-- William Hazlitt The difference between fiction and reality? Fiction has to make sense.
-- Tom Clancy Regions Thomas Jefferson--still surv...
-- John Adams, dying words "I'll endorse with my name any of the following; clothing AC-DC, cigarettes, small tapes, sound equipment, ROCK N' ROLL RECORDS, anything, film, and film equipment, Food, Helium, Whips, MONEY!!" (And Boredom is the feeling that everything is a waste of time; serenity, that nothing is.
-- Thomas Szasz Regions
Gravitation can not be held responsible for people falling in love.
-- Albert Einstein Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new.
-- Albert Einstein Hatred paralyzes life; love releases it.
Hatred confuses life; love harmonizes it.
Hatred darkens life; love illumines it.
-- Martin Luther King, Jr. "You are rewarding a teacher poorly if you remain always a pupil." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) I believe that mink are raised for being turned into fur coats and if we didn't wear fur coats those
little animals would never have been born. So is it better not to have been born or to have lived Regions For I am a bear of very little brain and long words bother me.
-- Winnie the Pooh, character from author A. A. Milne University politics are vicious precisely because the stakes are so small.
- Henry Kissinger "The evil that is in the world almost always comes of ignorance, and good intentions may do as much harm as malevolence if they lack understanding." (Albert Camus) Regions
In a novel, the hero can lay ten girls and marry a virgin for the finish. In a movie, that is not
allowed. The villain can lay anybody he wants, have as much fun and as he wants cheating,
stealing, You never see a man walking down the street with a woman who has a little pot belly and a bald
spot.
-- Elayne Boosler The one thing that doesn't abide by majority rule is a person's conscience.
-- Harper Lee "If you want a thing done well, do it yourself." (Napoleon Bonaparte) "Everything in my life has been determined by mistakes." (Gene Wilder) Regions What's another word for "Thesaurus?"
-- Steven Wright Children should be like waffles--you should be able to throw the first one away.
-- Mary Alice Messenger You don't have to suffer to be a poet; adolescence is enough suffering for anyone.
-- John Ciardi Regions
Marriage is a three ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering.
-- Anonymous The tragedy of life is not that it ends so soon, but that we wait so long to begin it.
-- Anonymous blah "There is a melancholy that stems from greatness." (Sébastien-Roch Nicolas Chamfort, 1740/41-1794) The bottom line is that (a) people are never perfect, but love can be, (b) that is the one and only
way that the mediocre and vile can be transformed, and (c) doing that makes it that. We waste
time For a male and female to live continuously together is...biologically speaking, an extremely
unnatural condition.
-- Robert Briffault Regions Tauzin backs term limits -- But he thinks it's a bad idea.
-- Headline, story in the New Orleans Times-Picayune, Feb 20, 1995 "Sometimes I think it's another sign of the sad necessity of our crowded, lonely lives, an urgent hopeless reaching out to touch something real, a deep hunger for something authentic when everything s And I shall love thee still my dear, Until my wife is wise. Regions
