Most turkeys taste better the day after; my mother's tasted better the day before.
-- Rita Rudner Love is the flower of life, and blossoms unexpectedly and without law, and must be plucked
where it is found, and enjoyed for the brief hour of its duration.
-- D. H. Lawrence Drink to me.
-- Pablo Picasso, dying words If something is boring after two minutes, try it for four. If still boring, then eight. Then sixteen. Then thirty-two. Eventually one discovers that it is not boring at all." (John Cage) People need loving the most when they deserve it the least.
-- John Harrigan Products and Services "Careful?! Was my mother careful when she stabbed me in the heart with a coat hanger while I was still in the womb?" (Trey Parker) 'Tis better to have loved and lost
Than never to have loved at all.
-- Alfred, Lord Tennyson, In Memoriam, 1850, line 27, stanza 4 Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed.
- George Burns Products and Services
"One must still have chaos in oneself to be able to give birth to a dancing star." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Martyrdom... is the only way in which a man can become famous without ability. George Bernard
Shaw (1856 - 1950), The Devil's Disciple (1901) act 3 "Employees make the best dates. You don't have to pick them up and they're always tax-deductible." (Andy Warhol, Andy Warhol's Exposures, 1980) Propel, propel, propel your craft softly down liquid solution. Ecstatically, ecstatically, ecstatically,
ecstatically, Existence is simply illusion.
-- Fred Rogers, parody of "Row, row, row your boa I think every woman is entitled to a middle husband she can forget.
-- Adela Rogers St. John Products and Services Idealism increases in direct proportion to one's distance from the problem.
-- John Galsworthy I'm worried that the universe will soon need replacing. It's not holding a charge.
-- Edward Chilton Being on the tightrope is living; everything else is waiting.
-- Karl Wallenda Products and Services
"All women love the men they fear. All women kiss the hand that rules them." (Lionel Atwill) Do not assume that she who seeks to comfort you now, lives untroubled among the simple and
quiet words that sometimes do you good. Her life may also have much sadness and difficulty, that
remains fa Cliches should be avoided like the plague.
-- Anon. The democratic theory is that if you accumulate enough ignorance at the polls, you produce
intelligence.
-- Philo Vance The wages of sin are death, but by the time taxes are taken out, it's just sort of a tired feeling.
-- Paula Poundstone Products and Services What a difference there is between what we say and what we think.
-- Racine Any sufficiently advanced bureaucracy is indistinguishable from molasses.
-- Anon. Ninety percent of everything is crap.
-- Theodore Sturgeon Products and Services
Nobody is more dangerous than he who imagines himself pure in heart; for his purity, by
definition, is unassailable.
-- James Baldwin, Nobody Knows My Name, 1961 Why is it that our memory is good enough to retain the least triviality that happens to us, and yet
not good enough to recollect how often we have told it to the same person?
-- François de La Rouch Try praising your wife, even if it does frighten her at first.
-- Billy Sunday Three o'clock is always too late or too early for anything you want to do.
- Jean-Paul Sartre If love is the answer, could you rephrase the question?
-- Lily Tomlin Products and Services The optimist proclaims that we live in the best of all possible worlds; and the pessimist fears this
is true.
-- James Branch Cabell, The Silver Stallion "If I work toward an end, meantime I am confined to a process. The rainbow is more beautiful than the pot at the end of it, because the rainbow is now. And the pot never turns out to be quite what I e "...when you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth." (Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, Sherlock Holmes) Products and Services
"If I work toward an end, meantime I am confined to a process. The rainbow is more beautiful than the pot at the end of it, because the rainbow is now. And the pot never turns out to be quite what I e Marriage is like a violin. After the music is over, you still have the strings.
-- Anonymous The theory used to be you marry an older man because they are more mature. The new theory is that men don't mature. So you might as well marry a younger one. I have a great diet. You're allowed to eat anything you want, but you must eat it with naked fat
people.
-- Ed Bluestone A Code of Honor: Never approach a friend's girlfriend or wife with mischief as your goal. There
are just too many women in the world to justify that sort of dishonorable behavior. Unless she's
reall Products and Services "You know what charm is: a way of getting the answer yes without having asked any clear question." (Albert Camus, The Fall) Marriage is an institution in which a man loses his Bachelor's Degree and the woman gets her Masters. Genius has somewhat of the infantine; But of the childish not a touch or taint.
-- Robert Browning Products and Services
"Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines." (John Benfield) "The things we admire in men, kindness and generosity, openness, honesty, understanding and feeling are the concomitants of failure in our system. And those traits we detest, sharpness, greed, acquisi The child is the father of the man.
-- William Wordsworth Women are like tea bags; put them in hot water and they get stronger.
-- Eleanor Roosevelt The child is the father of the man.
-- William Wordsworth Products and Services And gain is gain, however small.
-- Robert Browning A true gentleman is one who is never unintentionally rude.
-- Oscar Wilde "Deep down, no one really believes they have a right to live. But this death sentence generally stays tucked away, hidden beneath the difficulty of living. If that difficulty is removed from time to t Products and Services
"We must view young people not as empty bottles to be filled but as candles to be lit." (Robert Shaffer) "If man could be crossed with the cat, it would improve man but deteriorate the cat." (Mark Twain) "Life is a great surprise. I don't see why death should not be an even greater one." (Vladimir Nabokov) "It is the nature of a man as he grows older, a small bridge in time, to protest against change, particularly change for the better." (John Steinbeck, Travels With Charley) No race can prosper till it learns that there is as much dignity in tilling a field as in writing a poem.
-- Booker T. Washington Products and Services To love another person is to see the face of God.
-- Lyric from Les Miserables "Whenever a friend succeeds, a little something in me dies." (Gore Vidal) No wonder nobody comes here--it's too crowded.
-- Yogi Berra Products and Services
Humor is the first of the gifts to perish in a foreign tongue.
-- Virginia Woolf "May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house." (George Carlin) Infatuation is when you think that he's as sexy as Robert Redford, as smart as Henry Kissinger,
as noble as Ralph Nader, as funny as Woody Allen, and as athletic as Jimmy Conners. Love is
when you r "Plato was a bore." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) I hate it in friends when they come too late to help.
-- Euripides Products and Services There is a theory which states that if ever anybody discovers exactly what the Universe is for and
why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and
inex "People expect a certain reaction from a business, and when you pleasantly exceed those expectations, you've somehow passed an important psychological threshold." (Richard Thalheimer, president, The "If a million people say a foolish thing, it is still a foolish thing." (Anatole France) Products and Services
Old soldiers never die, they just fade away.
-- General Douglas MacArthur Even overweight cats instinctively know the cardinal rule: when fat, arrange yourself in slim
poses.
-- John Weitz, American Designer All I need to make a comedy is a park, a policeman and a pretty girl.
-- Charlie Chaplin Never regard study as a duty, but as the enviable opportunity to learn to know the liberating
influence of beauty in the realm of the spirit for your own personal joy and to the profit of the
commun Health food makes me sick.
-- Calvin Trillin Products and Services No man in the world has more courage than the man who can stop after eating one peanut.
-- Channing Pollack The grass may be greener on the other side of the fence, but you still have to mow it.
-- Anonymous Study men, not historians.
-- Harry Truman Products and Services
"So little done, so much to do." (Cecil Rhodes) Laundry increases exponentially in the number of children.
-- Miriam Robbins "Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful committed citizens can change the world, indeed it is the only thing that ever has." (Margaret Mead, 1901-78) To love is to receive a glimpse of heaven.
-- Karen Sunde "The brighter you are, the more you have to learn." (Don Herold) Products and Services Marriage is an institution in which a man loses his Bachelor's Degree and the woman gets her Masters. Blessed is he who has learned to laugh at himself, for he shall never cease to be entertained.
-- John Powell Wherever you have an efficient government you have a dictatorship.
-- Harry S. Truman Products and Services
The executive exists to make sensible exceptions to general rules.
-- Elting E. Morison "I have great faith in fools; My friends call it self-confidence." (Edger Allen Poe) Three o'clock is always too late or too early for anything you want to do.
- Jean-Paul Sartre I never hated a man enough to give him his diamonds back.
-- Zsa Zsa Gabor Dishonor will not trouble me, once I am dead.
-- Euripides Products and Services "Treat a man as he is, and he will remain as he is. Treat a man as he could be, and he will become what he should be." (Ralph Waldo Emerson) Most convicted felons are just people who were not taken to museums or Broadway musicals as
children.
-- Libby Gelman-Waxner We got to roll with the punches, play all of our hunches, make the best of whatever comes your
way. Forget that blind ambition, learn to trust your intuition -- plowing straight ahead, come what
may Products and Services