They're almost inseparable. Sometimes it takes ten people to separate them.
-- Anonymous Some of us are becoming the men we wanted to marry.
-- Gloria Steinem Conscience is the inner voice which warns us that someone may be looking.
-- H. L. Mencken The open-minded see the truth in different things: the narrow-minded see only the differences.
-- Author Unknown The one thing that doesn't abide by majority rule is a person's conscience.
-- Harper Lee World War II "'Contrariwise,' continued Tweedledee, 'if it was so, it might be, and if it were so, it would be; but as it isn't, it ain't. That's logic!'" (Lewis Carroll, Through the Looking Glass) Establishing yourself, furnishing a house, building up a comfortable existence, and having that menace hanging over your head all the time - no, I prefer to live in hotels, cafés, just passing through Losing a wife can be hard. In my case, it was almost impossible. World War II
Military justice is to justice what military music is to music.
-- George Clemenceau "Is man merely a mistake of God's? Or God merely a mistake of man's?" (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Whenever you eliminate the inedible, whatever remains, however unpalatable, must be food.
-- Anonymous I'm not dumb, I just have a command of thoroughly useless information.
-- Calvin "Man was born free and everywhere he is in chains." (Jean-Jacques Rousseau, French philosopher, The Social Contract) World War II This is the fourth?
-- Thomas Jefferson, dying words "I know that God won't give me more trouble than I can handle ... but sometimes I wish he wouldn't trust me so much." (Mother Teresa) Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die.
- Mel Brooks World War II
A wasted youth is better by far than a wise and productive old age.
-- Meat Loaf, from the song "Wasted Youth" on the album Bat Out of Hell II Perfection is achieved, not when there is nothing more to add, but when there is nothing left to
take away.
- Antoine de Saint Exupery I just want what every married woman wants, someone besides her husband to sleep with.
-- Peg Bundy, character on "Married with Children," U.S. television show A husband is a guy who tells you when you've got on too much lipstick and helps you with your
girdle when your hips stick.
-- Ogden Nash The difference between a man who faces death for the sake of an idea and an imitator who goes
in search of martyrdom is that the former expresses his idea most fully in death while the latter
really World War II Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your eyes off your goal.
-- Henry Ford In the end, everything is a gag.
-- Charlie Chaplin Many a man's reputation would not know his character if they met on the street.
- Elbert Hubbard World War II
Women are like tea bags; put them in hot water and they get stronger.
-- Eleanor Roosevelt Always behave like a duck--keep calm and unruffled on the surface but paddle like the devil
underneath.
-- Jacob Braude Tear open packet, unfold and use.
-- Directions on moist towelette package A man's reach should exeed his grasp, or else what's a heaven for?
-- Robert Browning Success is peace of mind which is a direct result of self-satisfaction in knowing you did your best
to become the best you are capable of becoming.
-- John R. Wooden, Practical Modern Basketball World War II "Failure is not an option!" (Ed Harris, as Gene Kranz, Apollo 13) "Friendship is born at the moment when one person says to another, 'What?! You too! Thought I was the only one.'" (Clive Staples Lewis) Wife: The perfect acquisition for any gentleman feeling himself to have excessive control over his personal affairs. World War II
Mathematics transfigures the fortuitous concourse of atoms into the tracery of the finger of God.
-- Herbert Westren Turnbull Music with dinner is an insult both to the cook and the violinist.
-- G. K. Chesterton Long engagements give people the opportunity of finding out each other's character before marriage, which is never advisable. -- Oscar Wilde Weaseling out of things is good. It's what separates us from the other animals....except weasels.
-- Homer Simpson, character from The Simpsons, U.S. animated television show cannot imagine any condition which would cause this ship to founder. Modern shipbuilding has
gone beyond that.
-- E. I. Smith, Captain of the Titanic World War II Don't worry about people stealing your ideas. If your ideas are any good, you'll have to ram them
down people's throats.
-- Howard Aiken The gods too are fond of a joke.
-- Aristotle "Nietzsche was stupid and abnormal." (Leo Tolstoy, 1828-1910) World War II
It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks. She's not marrying the best man.
-- Anonymous This isn't right, this isn't even wrong.
- Wolfgang Pauli (1900-1958), upon reading a young physicist's paper Fill what's empty, empty what's full, and scratch where it itches.
- the Duchess of Windsor, when asked what is the secret of a long and happy life The less their ability, the more their conceit.
Ahad HaAm "A man who tells lies, like me, merely hides the truth. But a man who tells half-lies has forgotten where he put it." (Claude Rains, as Mr. Dryden, Lawrence of Arabia, 1962) World War II "To live in the hearts we leave behind is not to die." (Thomas Campbell) To realize that you do not understand is a virtue;
Not to realize that you do not understand is a defect.
--Lao-Tzu, "Tao Teh Ching" If the government wants people to respect the law, it should set a better example.
-- Anon. World War II
When the mouse laughs at the cat, there is a hole nearby.
-- Nigerian Proverb Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.
-- George Bernard Shaw "The road of excess leads to the palace of wisdom." (William Blake) "The first duty of a revolutionary is to get away with it." (Abbie Hoffman) "I'm the artist formally known as Beck. I have a genius wig. When I put that wig on, then the true genius emerges. I don't have enough hair to be a genius. I think you have to have hair going everywhe World War II Usenet is like a herd of performing elephants with diarrhea -- massive, difficult to redirect, awe-
inspiring, entertaining, and a source of mind-boggling amounts of excrement when you least
expect i Patriotism is your conviction that this country is superior to all others because you were born in it.
-- George Bernard Shaw A man's feet should be planted in his country, but his eyes should survey the world.
-- George Santayana World War II
"Our destiny exercises its influence over us even when, as yet, we have not learned its nature: it is our future that lays down the law of our today." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) The real problem is not whether machines think but whether men do.
-- B. F. Skinner Politics have no relation to morals.
-- Niccolo Machiavelli Love is the dawn of marriage, and marriage is the sunset of love.
-- French saying "The man who never made a mistake never made anything." (Derek Longdon, Tongariro Power Development, Turangi, New Zealand) World War II If you are afraid of loneliness, do not marry. -- Chekhov Did you hear about the scientist whose wife had twins? He baptized one and kept the other as a control. I do not believe in an afterlife, although I am bringing a change of underwear.
-- Woody Allen World War II
"I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury." (Groucho Marx) The hard part about being a bartender is figuring out who is drunk and who is just stupid.
-- Richard Braunstein "Fools rush in where angels fear to tread." (Alexander Pope) "Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines." (John Benfield) All that we see or seem is but a dream within a dream.
-- Edgar Allan Poe World War II Where there is an unknowable there is a promise.
-- Thornton Wilder "Ideas are far more powerful than guns. We don't allow our enemies to have guns, why should we allow them to have ideas?" (Josef Stalin) blah "The length of this document defends it well against the risk of its being read." (Sir Winston Churchill, 1874-1965) World War II
A conclusion is the place where you got tired thinking.
-- Martin H. Fischer "Now that we have everything we need, we discover that there is almost nothing that we have that we want." (John Cage, M, Writings 1967 - 1972) "What you do speaks so loudly that I cannot hear what you say." (Ralph Waldo Emerson) There are three kinds of death in this world. There's heart death, there's brain death, and there's
being off the network.
-- Guy Almes If you talk to God, you are praying; if God talks to you, you have schizophrenia.
-- Thomas Szasz World War II Better to die ten thousand deaths than wound my honor.
-- Joseph Addison I worship the quicksand he walks in.
- Art Buchwald Man is the best computer we can put aboard a spacecraft...and the only one that can be mass
produced with unskilled labor.
-- Wernher von Braun World War II
"In some ways, I never outgrew my adolescence. I wake up in the morning and think, 'Oh my God, I'm late for a math test!' But then I say, 'Wait a minute. I'm 40.'" (Daniel Clowes) Anyone nit-picking enough to write a letter of correction to an editor doubtless deserves the error
that provoked it.
-- Alvin Toffler I require three things in a man: He must be handsome, ruthless, and stupid.
-- Dorothy Parker You can't buy love, but you can pay heavily for it.
-- Henny Youngman Our scientific power has outrun our spiritual power. We have guided missiles and misguided men.
-- Martin Luther King, Jr. World War II Correction: Instead of being arrested, as we stated, for kicking his wife down a flight of stairs and hurling a lighted kerosene lamp after her, the Rev. James P. Wellman died unmarried four years ago "I'm basically an optimist in life but this doesn't prevent me from deducing as a scientist that we are probably doomed." (Vladimir Chaloupka, physicist, University of Washington, regarding mankind's Love is friendship set on fire.
- Jeremy Taylor World War II
