If all these sweet young things were laid end to end, I wouldn't be the slightest bit surprised.
-- Dorothy Parker Intelligence has nothing to do with politics.
-- Londo Molari Death does not concern us, because as long as we exist, death is not here. And when it does
come, we no longer exist.
-- Epicurus It is not because it is difficult that we do not dare; it is because we do not dare that things are
difficult.
-- Lucius Anneaus Seneca Any man who is under 30, and is not a liberal, has not heart; and any man who is over 30, and is
not a conservative, has no brains.
- Sir Winston Churchill Women Sir Francis Drake circumsized the world with a 100-foot clipper.
-- Unknown history student Love may be a dream but marriage is a nightmare.
-- Joan Collins "Hold a true friend with both your hands." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Women
Nuns: Women who marry God. If they divorce Him, do they get half the universe? Considering the flames and intolerance, shouldn't USENET be spelled ABUSENET?
-- Michael Meissner I love children, especially when they cry, for then someone takes them away.
-- Nancy Mitford It's not the men in my life that count, it's the life in my men.
-- Mae West What I look forward to is continued immaturity followed by death.
-- Dave Barry Women Oregon Democratic Senate candidate Tom Bruggere, in describing his support for
comprehensive health care during a candidates' forum, said he supported "erection-to-
resurrection" coverage. He later a When you don't know that you don't know, it's a lot different than when you do know that you
don't know. He knows now that he doesn't know. Last year, he didn't know that.
-- Bill Parcels, New Engla History is the version of past events that people have decided to agree upon.
-- Napoleon Bonaparte Women
No one can earn a million dollars honestly.
- William Jennings Bryan "I feel I have to protect myself against things. So I'm pretty careful to lose most of them." (George Orson Welles) "A common mistake that people make when trying to design something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools." (Douglas Adams) Criticism is prejudice made plausible.
-- H. L. Mencken My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a
philosopher.
- Socrates Women Like a prune, you are not getting any better looking, but you are getting sweeter.
-- N. D. Stice I still live.
-- Daniel Webster, dying words "No man means all he says, and yet very few say all they mean, for words are slippery and thought is viscous." (Henry B. Adams) Women
Love is a perky elf dancing a merry little jig and then suddenly he turns on you with a miniature
machine gun.
-- Matt Groening, Love is Hell "My daughter has never forgiven me. for what, I don't know, because for years, she won't speak to me. She blackens my name in the press and makes me think abortion is an excellent idea." (Klaus Kinsk "I consider it the highest compliment when my employees go out and start their own companies in competition with me. I always send them a plant to wish them well. Of course, it's a cactus." (Norman B We trained hard - but it seemed that every time we were beginning to form up into teams we were
reorganized. I was to learn later in life that we tend to meet any new situation by reorganizing,
and If it were weren't for pickpockets, I'd have no sex life at all.
-- Rodney Dangerfield Women Of course there's a lot of knowledge in universities: the freshmen bring a little in; the seniors don't
take much away, so knowledge sort of accumulates...
-- Anonymous A coward is a hero with a wife, kids, and a mortgage.
-- Marvin Kitman "Those who dream by day are cognizant of many things which escape those who dream only by night." (Edger Allen Poe) Women
Chance is always powerful. - Let your hook be always cast; in the pool where you least expect it,
there will be a fish.
-- Ovid Generations to come will find it difficult to believe that a man such as Gandhi ever walked the
face of this earth.
-- Albert Einstein The trouble with her is that she lacks the power of conversation but not the power of speech.
-- George Bernard Shaw Give me chastity and continence, but not yet.
- Saint Augustine It was the experience of mystery -- even if mixed with fear -- that engendered religion.
- Albert Einstein Women "The monster a child knows best and is most concerned with [is] the monster he feels or fears himself to be. " (Bruno Bettelheim, child psychologist) blah bla "I never think of the future. It comes soon enough." (Albert Einstein) I am beginning to suspect all elaborate and special systems of education. They seem to me to be
built upon the supposition that every child is a kind of idiot who must be taught to think.
-- Anne S Women
Success is peace of mind which is a direct result of self-satisfaction in knowing you did your best
to become the best you are capable of becoming.
-- John R. Wooden, Practical Modern Basketball There is more to life than increasing its speed.
-- Gandhi "From the start, marriage was instituted for contemptible, practical reasons--an idea of men." (Catherine Deneuve) Feeding the hungry is a greater work than raising the dead.
-- Saint John Chrysostom Hey, you can't fight in here! This is the war room!
-- Dr. Strangelove Women Musical people always want one to be perfectly dumb at the very moment when one is longing to
be perfectly deaf.
-- Oscar Wilde Author: A fool, who, not content with having bored those who have lived with him, insists on
tormenting the generations to come.
-- Montesquieu The perfect love affair is one which is conducted entirely by post.
-- George Bernard Shaw Women
Egotist: a person more interested in himself than in me.
- Ambrose Bierce Patriotism is the last refuge of the scoundrel.
-- Samuel Johnson If you have any trouble sounding condescending, find a Unix user to show you how it's done.
-- Scott Adams We live at a time when man believes himself fabulously capable of creation, but he does not
know what to create.
-- Jose Ortega y Gasset We must respect the other fellow's religion, but only in the sense and to the extent that we respect his theory that his wife is beautiful and his children smart. -- H.L. Mencken Women "Do not do unto others as you expect they should do unto you. Their tastes may not be the same." (George Bernard Shaw) "The man who lets himself be bored is even more contemptible than the bore." (Samuel Butler) He didn't say that. He was reading what was given to him in a speech.
-- Richard Darman, director of OMB, explaining why President Bush wasn't following up on his
campaign pledge that there would be Women
"In order to attain the impossible, one must attempt the absurd." (Miguel de Cervantes Saavedra, 1547-1616) You cannot create experience. You must undergo it.
-- Albert Camus "Hold the fort! I am coming!" (General William Tecumseh Sherman) Maybe this world is another planet's hell.
-- Aldous Huxley Love looks through a telescope; envy, through a microscope.
-- Josh Billings Women Seeing much, suffering much, and studying much, are the three pillars of learning.
-- Benjamin Disraeli Conversation, fastidious Goddess, loves blood better than brick, and feasts most subtly on the
human will.
-- Virginia Woolf, Mrs. Dalloway Well-timed silence hath more eloquence than speech.
- Martin Fraquhar Tupper Women
"Life is a great surprise. I don't see why death should not be an even greater one." (Vladimir Nabokov) Never try to teach a pig to sing. It's a waste of your time and annoys the pig.
-- Anon. Seeing a murder on television can help work off one's antagonisms. And if you haven't any
antagonisms, the commercials will give you some.
-- Alfred Hitchcock Marry not a tennis player. For love means nothing to them. He is one of those people who would be enormously improved by death.
- H. H. Munro (Saki) Women Death does not concern us, because as long as we exist, death is not here. And when it does
come, we no longer exist.
-- Epicurus A real leader faces the music, even when he doesn't like the tune.
-- Anonymous "Greed, for lack of a better word, is good. Greed is right. Greed works." (Michael Douglas, as Gordon Gekko, Wall Street, 1987) Women
It is possible to store the mind with a million facts and still be entirely uneducated.
-- Alec Bourne, A Doctor's Creed I believe in equality for everyone, except reporters and photographers.
-- Gandhi A narcissist is someone better-looking than you are.
-- Gore Vidal "Liberty means responsibility. That is why most men dread it." (George Bernard Shaw) The important thing is not to stop questioning.
-- Albert Einstein Women Ambition is not a vice of little people.
-- Michel de Montaigne A Code of Honor: Never approach a friend's girlfriend or wife with mischief as your goal. There
are just too many women in the world to justify that sort of dishonorable behavior. Unless she's
reall "Great spirits have always found violent opposition from mediocrities. The latter cannot understand it when a man does not thoughtlessly submit to hereditary prejudices but honestly and courageously u Women
A small family is soon provided for.
-- English Proverb If I have seen farther than others, it is because I was standing on the shoulders of giants.
-- Isaac Newton Truth can be a dangerous thing. It is quite patient and relentless.
-- R. Scott Richards The true spirit of conversation consists in building on another man's observation, not overturning
it.
-- Edward Bulwer-Lytton Life does not cease to be funny when people die any more than it ceases to be serious when
people laugh.
-- George Bernard Shaw Women "My wallpaper and I are fighting a duel to the death. One or the other of us has to go." (Oscar Wilde, his last recorded words) "Listen, or your tongue will make you deaf." (Native American Proverb) Asking politicians to vote themselves out of power is like asking rabbits not to multiply, it ain't
natural.
-- Bob Beckel, on term limits, CBS This Morning, 3/30/95 Women
