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The difference between literature and journalism is that journalism is unreadable and literature is not read. -- Oscar Wilde I hate work. That's why I got married. -- Peg Bundy, character on "Married with Children," U.S. television show Skill without imagination is craftsmanship and gives us many useful objects such as wickerwork picnic baskets. Imagination without skill gives us modern art. -- Tom Stoppard "Great indebtedness does not make men grateful, but vengeful; and if a little charity is not forgotten, it turns into a gnawing worm." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche, Thus Spake Zarathustra) Anyone who considers arithmetical methods of producing random digits is, of course, in a state of sin. -- John Von Neuman Insurance Parents are the bones upon which children sharpen their teeth. -- Peter Ustinov A life spent in making mistakes is not only more honorable but more useful than a life spent doing nothing. -- George Benard Shaw The difference between fiction and reality? Fiction has to make sense. -- Tom Clancy Insurance The hardest thing in the world to understand is the income tax. -- Albert Einstein Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot- proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is A good marriage is at least 80 percent good luck in finding the right person at the right time. The rest is trust. -- Nanette Newman, British actress "I either want less corruption, or more chance to participate in it." (Ashleigh Brilliant) By the time (the Leaning Tower of Pisa) was 10% built, everyone knew it would be a total disaster. But the investment was so big they felt compelled to go on. Since its completion, it cost a fortune Insurance Is there life before death? -- Belfast Graffito I'll sleep when I'm dead. - Warren Zevon "...when you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth." (Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, Sherlock Holmes) Insurance "If liberty means anything at all, it means the right to tell people what they don't want to hear." (George Orwell) A woman's always younger than a man of equal years. -Elizabeth Barrett Browning, Aurora Leigh Cricket is best described as organised loafing. -- Anonymous British Radio Broadcaster, 1996 Marriage is a lottery, but you can't tear up your ticket if you lose. -- F. M. Knowles I skate to where the puck is going to be, not to where it has been. -- Wayne Gretzky Insurance The Church is an organism that grows best in an alien society. -- C. Stacey Woods "Those who dream by day are cognizant of many things which escape those who dream only by night." (Edger Allen Poe) Love is an emotion that is based on an opinion of women that is impossible for those who have had any experience with them. -- H. L. Mencken Insurance "I heard the old, old, men say 'all that's beautiful drifts away, like the waters.'" (William Butler Yeats) Mother-in-law: A woman who destroys her son-in-law's peace of mind by giving him a piece of hers. -- Anonymous Man is a natural polygamist. He always has one woman leading him by the nose and another hanging on to his coattails. -- H. L. Mencken "As long as people will accept crap, it will be financially profitable to dispense it." (Dick Cavett) In science one tries to tell people, in such a way as to be understood by everyone, something that no one ever knew before. But in poetry, it's the exact opposite. -- Paul Dirac Insurance A husband is a guy who tells you when you've got on too much lipstick and helps you with your girdle when your hips stick. -- Ogden Nash To read a writer is for me not merely to get an idea of what he says, but to go off with him and travel in his company. Andre Gide He can compress the most words into the smallest idea of any man I know. - Abraham Lincoln Insurance My wife has a split personality, and I hate both of them. We know the truth, not only by the reason, but also by the heart. -- Blaise Pascal, Thoughts, Chap. x. 1., Translated by O. W. Wight "Think off-center." (George Carlin) Hell is other people. - Jean-Paul Sartre "I was lousy in school. Real screwed-up. A moron. I was antisocial and didn't bother with the other kids. A really bad student. I didn't have any brains. I didn't know what I was doing there. That's w Insurance "You can get help from teachers, but you are going to have to learn a lot by yourself, sitting alone in a room." (Theodor Seuss Geisel, a.k.a. Dr. Seuss, 1904-1991, On becoming a writer, NY Times 21 I don't know exactly what democracy is. But we need more of it. -- Anonymous Chinese Student, during protests in Tianamen Square, Beijing, 1989 Marriage is a trip between Niagara Falls and Reno. Insurance Nothing takes the taste out of peanut butter quite like unrequited love. -- Charlie Brown, character in "Peanuts" comic strip, created by Charles Schultz "What sculpture is to a block of marble, education is to a human soul." (Joseph Addison) Sir Francis Drake circumsized the world with a 100-foot clipper. -- Unknown history student Whatever is begun in anger ends in shame. - Benjamin Franklin It is always right that a man should be able to render a reason for the faith that is within him. -- Sydney Smith Insurance "Better to be deprived of food for three days than tea for one." (Chinese Proverb) Its failings notwithstanding, there is much to be said in favor of journalism in that by giving us the opinion of the uneducated, it keeps us in touch with the ignorance of the community. -- Oscar W He had decided to live forever or die in the attempt. -- J. Heller Insurance If you can't get rid of the skeleton in your closet, you'd best teach it to dance. - George Bernard Shaw "I respect faith, but doubt is what gives you and education." (Wilson Mizner) "I would rather be exposed to the inconveniences attending too much liberty than to those attending too small a degree of it." (Thomas Jefferson, to Archibald Stuart, 1791) Why bother with marriage? Just find a woman you hate and buy her a house. "Any existence deprived of freedom is a kind of death." (General Michel Aoun) Insurance Do not let yourselves be discouraged or embittered by the smallness of the success you are likely to achieve in trying to make life better. You certainly would not be able, in a single generation, to Researchers have discovered that chocolate produces some of the same reactions in the brain as marijuana...The researchers also discovered other similarities between the two, but can't remember what Viewed from the summit of reason, all life looks like a malignant disease and the world like a madhouse. -- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe Insurance >From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it. -- Groucho Marx "When a girl marries, she exchanges the attentions of all the other men of her acquaintance for the inattention of just one." (Helen Rowland) Marriage is like a hot bath. Once you get used to it, it's not so hot. -- Anonymous "Better is the enemy of good." (Francois Marie Arouet Voltaire, 1694-1778) Asking an incumbent member of Congress to vote for term limits is a bit like asking a chicken to vote for Colonel Sanders. -- Bob Inglis, 1995 Insurance Do or do not. There is no try. -- Yoda, character in the movie The Empire Strikes Back It is a product of Einstein's genius -- taking a commonplace observation, combining it with some simple imaginary experiments, and arriving at a revolutionary conclusion. -- Clifford M. Wills, 1986 The most exciting attractions are between two opposites that never meet. -- Andy Warhol Insurance Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience. "What is most appealing about young folks, after all, is the changes, not the still photograph of finished character but the movie, the soul in flux." (Thomas Pynchon) If the government wants people to respect the law, it should set a better example. -- Anon. In medieval times, people thought that evil spirits could enter a person through an open mouth. These days they more often leave that way. -- David Deckert If you do not tell the truth about yourself you cannot tell it about other people. -- Virginia Woolf Insurance What's new? Most of my wife. Talent does what it can; genius does what it must. - Edward George Bulwer-Lytton "Greed, for lack of a better word, is good. Greed is right. Greed works." (Michael Douglas, as Gordon Gekko, Wall Street, 1987) Insurance "As a child, I thought I hated everybody, but when I grew up I realized it was just children I didn't like." (Philip Larkin) People may or may not say what they mean ... but they always say something designed to get what they want. -- David Mamet If we do not maintain Justice, Justice will not maintain us. -- Francis Bacon In matrimony, to hesitate is sometimes to be saved. -- Samuel Butler Thus the metric system did not really catch on in the States, unless you count the increasing popularity of the nine-millimeter bullet. -- Dave Barry Insurance The love we give away is the only love we keep. -- Elbert Hubbard "If you want a thing done well, do it yourself." (Napoleon Bonaparte) I've been asked to say a couple of words about my husband, Fang. How about 'short' and 'cheap'? -- Phyllis Diller Insurance People think we make $3 million and $4 million a year. They don't realize that most of us only make $500,000. -- Pete Incaviglia, baseball player, 1990 The higher up you go, the more mistakes you are allowed. Right at the top, if you make enough of them, it's considered to be your style. -- Fred Astaire "If liberty and equality, as is thought by some, are chiefly to be found in democracy, they will be best attained when all persons alike share in government to the utmost." (Aristotle) Consequences, schmonsequences, as long as I'm rich! -- Chuck Jones-directed cartoon One survey found that ten percent of Americans thought Joan of Arc was Noah's wife.... -- Robert Boynton Insurance Education is not filling a bucket, but lighting a fire. -- William Yeats "The road of excess leads to the palace of wisdom." (William Blake) First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win. - Mahatma Gandhi Insurance
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