"Try not to have a good time ... This is supposed to be educational." (Charles Schultz) In marriage, the bridge gets a shower. But for the groom, it's curtains! "If you want to get laid, go to college. If you want an education, go to the library." (Frank Zappa) "The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore, all progress depends on the unreasonable man." (George Bernard Shaw) Character may be manifested in the great moments, but it is made in the small ones.
-- Phillip Brooks Pawn Brokers Most married couples, even though they love each other very much in theory, tend to view each
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Books had instant replay long before televised sports.
-- Bern Williams Whoever called it necking was a poor judge of anatomy.
-- Groucho Marx When a man takes an oath, Meg, he's holding his ownself in his own hands. Like water. And if he
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-- Robert Bolt from A Man For All Seas I am ready to meet my Maker. Whether my Maker is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me
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- Sir Winston Churchill Harpo, she's a lovely person. She deserves a good husband. Marry her before she finds one.
-- Oscar Levant, to Harpo Marx upon meeting Harpo's fiancee Pawn Brokers If I were a girl, I'd despair. The supply of good women far exceeds that of the men who deserve
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-- Robert Graves A teacher is one who makes himself progressively unnecessary.
-- Thomas Carruthers We must respect the other fellow's religion, but only in the sense and to the extent that we respect his theory that his wife is beautiful and his children smart. -- H.L. Mencken Pawn Brokers
Women: If they're not turning down your proposals for marriage, they're accusing you of
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-- Cliff Clavin, character on "Cheers", U.S. Televi The less their ability, the more their conceit.
Ahad HaAm My wife has a split personality, and I hate both of them. "I consider it the highest compliment when my employees go out and start their own companies in competition with me. I always send them a plant to wish them well. Of course, it's a cactus." (Norman B If you are afraid of loneliness, don't marry.
-- Chekhov Pawn Brokers Golf is a good walk spoiled.
-- Mark Twain "Great spirits have always found violent opposition from mediocrities. The latter cannot understand it when a man does not thoughtlessly submit to hereditary prejudices but honestly and courageously u When I was a kid my favorite relative was Uncle Caveman. After school we'd all go play in his
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Uncl Pawn Brokers
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"Let no one be discouraged by the belief there is nothing one person can do against the enormous array of the world's ills, misery, ignorance, and violence. Few will have the greatness to bend history The tragedy of life is not that man loses, but that he almost wins.
-- Heywood Brown Love is a snowmobile racing across the tundra and then suddenly it flips over, pinning you
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-- Matt Groening, Love is Hell Pawn Brokers "How wondrous familiar is a fool!" (Herman Melville, Moby Dick) Life is ours to be spent, not to be saved.
-- D.H. Lawrence The great man fights the elements in his time that hinder his own greatness, in other words his own freedom and sincerity." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Pawn Brokers
The only thing you will ever be able to say in the so-called 'social' sciences is: "some do, some
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-- Ernest Rutherford A behaviorist is someone who pulls habits out of rats.
-- Anonymous Blessed is the man, who having nothing to say, abstains from giving wordy evidence of the fact.
- George Eliot "You make 'em, I amuse 'em." (Theodor Seuss Geisel, a.k.a. Dr. Seuss, 1904-1991, on children) Imagination is the highest kite one can fly.
-- Lauren Bacall Pawn Brokers We have only one person to blame, and that's each other.
-- Barry Beck, New York Ranger, on who started a fight furing a hockey game Not much meat on her, but what's there is choice.
-- Spencer Tracy, about Katharine Hepburn "I'll endorse with my name any of the following; clothing AC-DC, cigarettes, small tapes, sound equipment, ROCK N' ROLL RECORDS, anything, film, and film equipment, Food, Helium, Whips, MONEY!!" (And Pawn Brokers
"He who asks is a fool for five minutes, but he who does not ask remains a fool forever." (Chinese Proverb) MARRIAGE, n. The state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress and two
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-- Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, 1911 He is one of those people who would be enormously improved by death.
- H. H. Munro (Saki) Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution.
-- Mae West If I tell a lie it's only because I think I'm telling the truth.
-- Phil Gaglardi, Minister of Highways, British Columbia, Canada Pawn Brokers Never judge someone by who he's in love with; judge him by his friends. People fall in love with
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-- Cynthia Heimel Death does not concern us, because as long as we exist, death is not here. And when it does
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-- Epicurus There's no problem so awful that you can't add some guilt to it and make it even worse!
-- Calvin Pawn Brokers
Natural ability without education has more often attained to glory and virtue than education
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Cicero (106 BC - 43 BC) "To educate educators! But the first ones must educate themselves! And for these I write." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Flowers are words which even a baby can understand.
-- Arthur C. Coxe "O' What may man within him hide, though angel on the outward side!" (William Shakespeare) "In some ways, I never outgrew my adolescence. I wake up in the morning and think, 'Oh my God, I'm late for a math test!' But then I say, 'Wait a minute. I'm 40.'" (Daniel Clowes) Pawn Brokers Beneath the rule of men entirely great, / The pen is mightier than the sword.
-- Edward Robert Bulwer-Lytton, Richelieu, II. ii "Think off-center." (George Carlin) "The greatest dangers to liberty lurk in insidious encroachment by men of zeal, well meaning, but without understanding." (Louis Brandeis) Pawn Brokers
My wife says if I go fishing one more time she's going to leave me. Gosh, I'm going to miss her. He who laughs last has not yet heard the bad news.
-- Bertolt Brecht "Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are a good person is like expecting a bull not to attack you because you are a vegetarian." (Dennis Wholey) The sun never sets on the British empire because Britain is in the east and the sun sets in the
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-- Unknown history student "Fear is the dark room where the Devil develops his negatives." (Gary Busey) Pawn Brokers America is the only nation in history which miraculously has gone directly from barbarism to
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-- George Clemenceau Jake liked his women the way he liked his kiwi fruit: sweet yet tart, firm-fleshed yet yielding to the
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-- Jonathan S. Haas Ah Mozart! He was happily married - but his wife wasn't. -- Borge Pawn Brokers
"Paper should be edible, nutritious. Inks used for printing or writing should have delicious flavors. Magazines or newspapers read at breakfast should be eaten for lunch. Instead of throwing one's mai Great ability develops and reveals itself increasingly with every new assignment. Baltasar
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-- Bill Moyers I want to die in my sleep like my friend.... Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his
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-- Seen on a bumper sticker A grouch escapes so many little annoyances that it almost pays to be one.
-- Kin Hubbard Pawn Brokers "To live is to dream and to die is to awaken." (Anonymous) At the bottom no one in life can help anyone else in life; this one experiences over and over in
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-- Charlie Chaplin Pawn Brokers
The power of accurate observation is frequently called cynicism by those who don't have it.
- George Bernard Shaw People think we make $3 million and $4 million a year. They don't realize that most of us only
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-- Pete Incaviglia, baseball player, 1990 "In order to attain the impossible, one must attempt the absurd." (Miguel de Cervantes Saavedra, 1547-1616) There is no such thing as a moral or an immoral book. Books are well written or badly written.
-- Oscar Wilde Every normal man must be tempted at times to spit upon his hands, hoist the black flag, and
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- Henry Louis Mencken Pawn Brokers My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a
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- Socrates There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called
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-- James Holt McGavran LOVE, n. A temporary insanity curable by marriage or by removal of the patient from the
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Each of us has a spark of life inside us, and our highest endeavor ought to be to set off that spark
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-- Kenny Ausubel And in the end it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years.
-- Abraham Lincoln To look backward for a while is to refresh the eye, to restore it, and to render it more fit for its
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-- Margaret Fairless Barber My wife ran off with my best friend last week. I miss him! "See - one side of my face is gentle and kind, incapable of anything but love of my fellow man. The other side, the other profile, is cruel and predatory and evil, incapable of anything but lusts and Pawn Brokers Integrity without knowledge is weak and useless, and knowledge without integrity is dangerous
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-- Samuel Johnson There are some things which cannot be learned quickly, and time, which is all we have, must be
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-- Paula Poundstone Pawn Brokers
