"People have to talk about something just to keep their voice boxes in working order so they'll have good voice boxes in case there's ever anything really meaningful to say." (Kurt Vonnegut) May you be too good for the world and not good enough for your wife. You can complain because roses have thorns, or you can rejoice because thorns have roses.
-- Ziggy, character in comic strip by Tom Wilson Losing a wife can be hard. In my case, it was almost impossible. The Bible tells us to love our neighbors, and also to love our enemies; probably because
generally they are the same people.
-- G. K. Chesterton Z In the End, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.
- Martin Luther King Jr. "College: two hundred people reading same book. An obvious mistake. Two hundred people can read two hundred books." (John Cage, M, Writings 1967 - 1972) It ain't what we don't know that gives us trouble, it's what we know that ain't so.
-- Will Rogers Z
I think we are drawn to dogs because they are the uninhibited creatures we might be if we weren't
certain we knew better.
-- George Bird Evans Wise men make proverbs, but fools repeat them.
- Samuel Palmer We are not retreating - we are advancing in another Direction.
- General Douglas MacArthur If a thing is worth doing at all, it is worth doing badly.
-- Gustav Holst, on amateur music-making The true spirit of conversation consists in building on another man's observation, not overturning
it.
-- Edward Bulwer-Lytton Z My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a
philosopher.
- Socrates If you cannot be the master of your language, you must be its slave. If you cannot examine your
thoughts, you have no choice but to think them, however silly they may be.
-- Richard Mitchell, from "Some people wear their heart up on their sleeve. I wear mine underneath my right pant leg, strapped to my boot." (Ani Difranco) Z
"I don't understand why people are frightened of new ideas. I'm frightened of the old ones." (John Cage) It was very good of God to let Carlyle and Mrs Carlyle marry one another and so make only two people miserable instead of four, besides being very amusing. "If liberty and equality, as is thought by some, are chiefly to be found in democracy, they will be best attained when all persons alike share in government to the utmost." (Aristotle) The executive exists to make sensible exceptions to general rules.
-- Elting E. Morison The Churches must learn humility as well as teach it.
-- George Bernard Shaw, St. Joan Z The theory used to be you marry an older man because they are more mature. The new theory is
that men don't mature. So you might as well marry a younger one.
-- Anonymous When people talk, listen completely. Most people never listen.
-- Ernest Hemingway "It is my ambition to say in ten sentences what other men say in whole books--what other men do not say in whole books." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche, Twilight of the Idols) Z
If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate.
-- Steven Wright Imagine if birds were tickled by feathers. You'd see a flock of birds come by, laughing hysterically!
-- Steven Wright The more faithfully you listen to the voices within you, the better you will hear what is sounding
outside.
-- Dag Hammarskjold "Liberty means responsibility. That is why most men dread it." (George Bernard Shaw) The majority of husbands remind me of an orangutan trying to play the violin.
-- Honore de Balzac Z "Marriage excuses no one the freak's roll-call." (Joe Orton, What the Butler Saw) Military justice is to justice what military music is to music.
-- George Clemenceau Jake liked his women the way he liked his kiwi fruit: sweet yet tart, firm-fleshed yet yielding to the
touch, and covered with short brown fuzzy hair.
-- Jonathan S. Haas Z
When you have to kill a man, it costs nothing to be polite.
- Sir Winston Churchill I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body.
-- Winston Bennett, University of Kentucky basketball forward "Against stupidity the very gods themselves contend in vain." (Johann Christian Friedrich von Schiller, 1759-1805, The Maid of Orleans. Act iii. Sc. 6.) Defeat never comes to any man until he admits it.
-- Josephus Daniels You can take all the sincerity in Hollywood, place it in the navel of a firefly and still have room
enough for three caraway seeds and a producer's heart.
-- Fred Allen Z Property may be destroyed and money may lose its purchasing power; but, character, health,
knowledge and good judgement will always be in demand under all conditions.
-- Roger Babson Marriage is a great institution, but who wants to live in an institution?
-- Marx Groucho, the film "Animal Crackers" Where there is marriage without love, there will be love without marriage.
-- Benjamin Franklin Z
A memorandum is written not to inform the reader but to protect the writer.
-- Dean Acheson "... and then the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom." (Anais Nin) "I don't think it's the nature of any man to be monogamous. Men are propelled by genetically ordained impulses over which they have no control to distribute their seed." (Marlon Brando) Millions long for immortality who do not know what to do with themselves on a rainy Sunday
afternoon.
-- Susan Ertz "The market is not an invention of capitalism. It has existed for centuries. It is an invention of civilization." (Mikhail Gorbachev, June 8, 1990) Z "I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury." (Groucho Marx) "Transport of the mails, transport of the human voice, transport of flickering pictures--in this century as in others our highest accomplishments still have the single aim of bringing men together." We don't like their sound, and guitar music is on the way out.
-- Decca Recording Company, rejecting the Beatles, 1962 Z
Many a man has finally succeeded only because he has failed after repeated efforts. If he had
never met defeat he would never have known any great victory.
-- Orison Swett Marden "Life is measured by the rapidity of change, the succession of influences that modify the being." (George Eliot) Life isn't a matter of milestones, but of moments.
-- Rose Kennedy I don't know anything about music. In my line you don't have to.
-- Elvis Presley I heard someone tried the monkeys-on-typewriters bit trying for the plays of W. Shakespeare, but
all they got was the collected works of Francis Bacon.
- Bill Hirst Z Never raise your hands to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected.
-- Red Buttons Character is what you are in the dark.
-- Dwight L. Moody "Common sense and education are highly compatible; in fact, neither is worth much without the other." (Donald G. Smith) Z
"I've just had eighteen straight whiskies. I think that's the record." (Dylan Thomas, final words) If everybody is thinking alike, then somebody isn't thinking.
-- George S. Patton, Jr. Honolulu, it's got everything. Sand for the children, sun for the wife, sharks for the wife's mother.
-- Ken Dodd No matter who you vote for, the Government always gets in.
-- Anon. "I love to doubt as well as know." (Dante Alighieri, 1265-1321) Z The less a man thinks or knows about his virtues, the better we like him.
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson The most wasted day of all is that in which we have not laughed.
-- Sebastian Roch Nicolas Chamfort An eye for an eye only leads to more blindness.
-- Margaret Atwood Z
It makes no difference who you vote for - the two parties are really one party representing four
percent of the people.
-- Gore Vidal It was a day like this Marco Polo left for China. What are your plans for today?
--Loesje When you are right, you cannot be too radical; When you are wrong, you cannot be too
conservative.
-- Martin Luther King, Jr. "The dancer's body is simply the luminous manifestation of the soul." (Isadora Duncan) "I'm basically an optimist in life but this doesn't prevent me from deducing as a scientist that we are probably doomed." (Vladimir Chaloupka, physicist, University of Washington, regarding mankind's Z Don't ever take a fence down until you know why it was put up.
-- Robert Frost None but a good man is really a living man, and the more good any man does, the more he really
lives. All the rest is death, or belongs to it.
-- Herman Melville "The depth and strength of a human character are defined by its moral reserves. People reveal themselves completely only when they are thrown out of the customary conditions of their life, for only th Z
In a cat's eyes, all things belong to cats.
-- English Proverb The instinct of nearly all societies is to lock up anybody who is truly free. First, society begins by
trying to beat you up. If this fails, they try to poison you. If this fails too, the finish by l "These are days you'll remember." If you recall nothing else from your graduation ceremony,
remember you heard the New Jersey Governor quote from 10,000 Maniacs.
-- Christine Todd, NJ Governor, Whea Any man who is under 30, and is not a liberal, has not heart; and any man who is over 30, and is
not a conservative, has no brains.
- Sir Winston Churchill I feel like Zsa Zsa Gabor's sixth husband. I know what I'm supposed to do, but I don't know how
to make it interesting.
-- Milton Berle, when called to the microphone at the 2nd Annual Comedians Hal Z The gods gave man fire and he invented fire engines. They gave him love and he invented marriage. There is no future in any job. The future lies in the man who holds the job.
-- George Crane "If a man does not make new acquaintances as he advances through life, he will soon find himself left alone. A man, sir, should keep his friendship in a constant repair." (Samuel Johnson) Z
I hate work. That's why I got married.
-- Peg Bundy, character on "Married with Children," U.S. television show The only one of your children who does not grow up and move away is your husband. Every normal man must be tempted at times to spit upon his hands, hoist the black flag, and
begin slitting throats.
- Henry Louis Mencken Victory goes to the player who makes the next-to-last mistake.
- Chessmaster Savielly Grigorievitch Tartakower What is life? It is the flash of a firefly in the night. It is the breath of a buffalo in the wintertime. It is
the little shadow which runs across the grass and loses itself in the sunset.
-- Crowf Z "A celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to become well known, then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized." (Fred Allen) "He who speaks of what he knows not only works hard to portray his ignorance." (Joseph Muchemi) Usenet is like Tetris for people who still remember how to read.
-- Button from the Computer Museum, Boston, MA Z
