Harpo, she's a lovely person. She deserves a good husband. Marry her before she finds one.
-- Oscar Levant, to Harpo Marx upon meeting Harpo's fiancee The most savage controversies are about those matters as to which there is no good evidence
either way.
-- Bertrand Russell You can't learn too soon that the most useful thing about a principle is that it can always be
sacrificed to expediency.
-- W. Somerset Maugham If I were a girl, I'd despair. The supply of good women far exceeds that of the men who deserve
them.
-- Robert Graves A new idea is delicate. It can be killed by a sneer or a yawn; it can be stabbed to death by a joke
or worried to death by a frown on the right person's brow.
-- Charles Brower Judaism I choose a block of marble and chop off whatever I don't need.
- Francois-Auguste Rodin (1840-1917), when asked how he managed to make his remarkable
statues Fine art and pizza delivery: what we do falls neatly in between.
-- David Letterman I've always thought that underpopulated countries in Africa are vastly underpolluted.
-- Lawrence Summers, chief economist of the World Bank, explaining why we should export toxic
wastes to Third Wo Judaism
Life is a sexually transmitted terminal disease.
-- Colin Greene Teaching is not a lost art, but the regard for it is a losttradition.
-- Jacques Barzun Long engagements give people the opportunity of finding out each other's character before marriage, which is never advisable. -- Oscar Wilde "Man looks in the abyss, there's nothing staring back at him. At that moment, man finds his character. And that is what keeps him out of the abyss." (Hal Holbrook, Wallstreet) I have come to the conclusion never again to think of marrying, and for this reason, I can never
be satisfied with anyone who would be blockhead enough to have me.
-- Abraham Lincoln, in a letter to Judaism If the facts don't fit the theory, change the facts.
-- Albert Einstein "I would rather be exposed to the inconveniences attending too much liberty than to those attending too small a degree of it." (Thomas Jefferson, to Archibald Stuart, 1791) "When a hundred men stand together, each of them loses his mind and gets another one." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Judaism
I told my wife that a husband is like a fine wine; he gets better with age. The next day, she locked
me in the cellar.
-- Anonymous No man in the world has more courage than the man who can stop after eating one peanut.
-- Channing Pollack Hell is a half-filled auditorium.
-- Robert Frost "I had discovered that a person does not have to be this or be that or be anything, not even oneself. One is free." (Walker Percy, The Moviegoer) "Friendship is born at the moment when one person says to another, 'What?! You too! Thought I was the only one.'" (Clive Staples Lewis) Judaism Power corrupts. Absolute power is kind of neat.
-- John Lehman, Secretary of the Navy, 1981-1987 Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new.
-- Albert Einstein The average, healthy, well-adjusted adult gets up at seven-thirty in the morning feeling just plain
terrible.
-- Jean Kerr Judaism
"I have never met a man so ignorant that I couldn't learn something from him." (Galileo Galilei) "Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are a good person is like expecting a bull not to attack you because you are a vegetarian." (Dennis Wholey) "I have never met a man so ignorant that I couldn't learn something from him." (Galileo Galilei) I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.
- Mark Twain I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain
and bought jewelry.
-- Rita Rudner Judaism Marriage is a matter of give and take, but so far I haven't been able to find anybody who'll take what I have to give. -- Cass Daley In this world of sin and sorrow there is always something to be thankful for; as for me, I rejoice
that I am not a Republican.
-- H. L. Mencken It's important to be open-minded, but not SO open-minded that your brains fall out.
-- Rick Radebaugh Judaism
Nothing is beneath you if it is in the direction of your life.
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson "Children spell love...T-I-M-E." (Dr. Anthony P. Witham) My theology, briefly, is that the universe was dictated but not signed.
-- Christopher Morley The democratic theory is that if you accumulate enough ignorance at the polls, you produce
intelligence.
-- Philo Vance The voice of the intellect is a soft one, but it does not rest till it has gained a hearing.
-- Sigmund Freud Judaism Love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind; And therefore is winged Cupid painted blind.
-- William Shakespeare, A Midsummer Night's Dream, Act i. Sc. 1. "Life is measured by the rapidity of change, the succession of influences that modify the being." (George Eliot) If law school is so hard to get through... how come there are so many lawyers?
-- Calvin Trillin Judaism
If you would thoroughly know anything, teach it to others.
-- Tryon Edwards Marriage was all a woman's idea and for man's acceptance of the pretty yoke, it becomes us to
be grateful.
-- Phyllis McGinley Some people go to priests; others to poetry; I to my friends.
-- Virginia Woolf, Bernard, in The Waves, 1931; repr. 1943, p. 189 All I need to make a comedy is a park, a policeman and a pretty girl.
-- Charlie Chaplin A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle.
-- Gloria Steinem Judaism "Genius without education is like silver in the mine." (Benjamin Franklin) Don't anthropomorphize computers -- they hate it.
-- Anonymous "The intellect is always fooled by the heart." (François VI Duke (duc) de La Rochefoucauld, 1616-80) Judaism
Imagination is the highest kite one can fly.
-- Lauren Bacall May you grow so rich your widow's second husband never has to worry about a living, God forbid. Based on what you know about him in history books, what do you think Abraham Lincoln would
be doing if he were alive today?
1) Writing his memoirs of the Civil War.
2) Advising the President.
3) D "I had discovered that a person does not have to be this or be that or be anything, not even oneself. One is free." (Walker Percy, The Moviegoer) I am returning this otherwise good typing paper to you because someone has printed gibberish all
over it and put your name at the top.
-- English Professor, Ohio University Judaism Half of the American people never read a newspaper.
Half never voted for President.
One hopes it is the same half.
-- Gore Vidal Marriage is very much like a violin; after the sweet music is over, the strings are attached. You can only find truth with logic if you have already found truth without it.
- Gilbert Keith Chesterton Judaism
Tauzin backs term limits -- But he thinks it's a bad idea.
-- Headline, story in the New Orleans Times-Picayune, Feb 20, 1995 Good hours, excellent pay, fun place to work, paid training, mean boss. Oh well, four out of five
isn't bad.
-- Help Wanted Ad, PA newspaper, 1994 Glory is fleeting, but obscurity is forever.
-- Napoleon Bonaparte Idealism increases in direct proportion to one's distance from the problem.
-- John Galsworthy If men knew all that women think, they'd be twenty times more daring.
-- Alphonse Karr Judaism The real problem is not whether machines think but whether men do.
-- B. F. Skinner "Nothing in education is so astonishing as the amount of ignorance it accumulates in the form of inert facts." (Henry B. Adams) Perfection is what American women expect to find in their husbands... but English women only
hope to find in their butlers.
-- W. Somerset Maugham Judaism
"Most people would rather die than think; in fact, they do so." (Bertrand Arthur William Russell, 1872-1970) We cease loving ourselves if no one loves us.
-- Mme de Staël Courage is the ladder on which all the other virtues mount.
-- Clare Boothe Luce "I owe much to my friends; but, all things considered, it strikes me that I owe even more to my enemies. The real person springs life under a sting even better than under a caress." (André Gide) "So little done, so much to do." (Cecil Rhodes) Judaism Marrying a man is like buying something you've been admiring for a long time in a shop window.
You may love it when you get it home, but it doesn't always go with everything in the house.
-- Jean Ke "To live in the hearts we leave behind is not to die." (Thomas Campbell) "It is dangerous to be right in matters on which the established authorities are wrong." (Francois Marie Arouet Voltaire, 1694-1778) Judaism
There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics.
-- Benjamin Disraeli It's not the size of the dog in the fight, it's the size of the fight in the dog.
-- Mark Twain People may or may not say what they mean ... but they always say something designed to get
what they want.
-- David Mamet Virtue is like health: the harmony of the whole man.
-- Thomas Carlyle It is the customary fate of new truths to begin as heresies and to end as superstitions.
-- Aldous Huxley Judaism The hardest thing in the world to understand is the income tax.
-- Albert Einstein It's impossible to experience one's death objectively and still carry a tune.
-- Woody Allen Love matches, so called, have illusion for their father and need for their mother.
-- Friedrich Nietzsche Judaism
He that would have the fruit must climb the tree.
-- Thomas Fuller, M.D. "We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence then is not an act but a habit." (Aristotle) Youth is wasted on the young.
-- George Bernard Shaw An eye for an eye only leads to more blindness.
-- Margaret Atwood "In order to preserve your self-respect, it is sometimes necessary to lie and cheat." (Robert Byrne) Judaism The love we give away is the only love we keep.
-- Elbert Hubbard Genius is an African who dreams up snow.
-- Vladimir Nabokov Statistics are like a bikini. What they reveal is suggestive, but what they conceal is vital.
-- Aaron Levenstein Judaism
