Football incorporates the two worst elements of American society: violence punctuated by
committee meetings.
-- George F. Will, journalist, political commentator, 1994 I admire the serene assurance of those who have religious faith. It is wonderful to observe the
calm confidence of a Christian with four aces.
-- Mark Twain All women are born evil. Some just realize their potential later in life than others.
-- Chad A. Gamble, Escape, short story There is more stupidity than hydrogen in the universe, and it has a longer shelf life.
- Frank Zappa Sign in a marriage counselor's window: "Out to lunch - Think it over." Arts and Entertainment A jury consists of twelve persons chosen to decide who has the better lawyer.
Robert Frost (1874-1963) To love someone deeply gives you strength. Being loved by someone deeply gives you courage.
-- Lao Tzu It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks. She's not marrying the best man.
-- Anonymous Arts and Entertainment
Whoever controls the media--the images--controls the culture.
-- Allen Ginsberg "Don't walk in front of me; I may not follow. Don't walk behind me; I may not lead. Walk beside me and just be my friend." (Albert Camus) "Excellence is in the details. Give attention to the details and excellence will come." (Perry Paxton) The telephone company is urging people to *please* not use the telephone unless it is absolutely
necessary in order to keep the lines open for emergency personnel. We'll be right back after this
bre Jake liked his women the way he liked his kiwi fruit: sweet yet tart, firm-fleshed yet yielding to the
touch, and covered with short brown fuzzy hair.
-- Jonathan S. Haas Arts and Entertainment Good breeding consists in concealing how much we think of ourselves and how little we think of
the other person.
-- Mark Twain Trying to determine what is going on in the world by reading newspapers is like trying to tell the
time by watching the second hand of a clock.
-- Ben Hecht The object of war is not to die for your country but to make the other bastard die for his.
-- General George Patton Arts and Entertainment
Someday is not a day of the week.
-- Anon. "There are some enterprises in which a careful disorderliness is the true method." (Herman Melville, Moby Dick) Good friends are good for your health.
-- Irwin Sarason Grove giveth and Gates taketh away.
- Bob Metcalfe (inventor of Ethernet) on the trend of hardware speedups not being able to keep
up with software demands Idealism increases in direct proportion to one's distance from the problem.
-- John Galsworthy Arts and Entertainment "Fools rush in where angels fear to tread." (Alexander Pope) Experience is not what happens to you; it's what you do with what happens to you.
-- Aldous Huxley "Beauty without expression is boring." (Ralph Waldo Emerson) Arts and Entertainment
An undefined problem has an infinite number of solutions.
-- Robert A. Humphrey Marriage is a rest period between romances. Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards.
-- Soren Kierkegaard Inanimate objects are classified scientifically into three categories-- those that don't work, those
that break down, and those that get lost.
-- Russell Baker We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.
-- Aristotle Arts and Entertainment I choose a block of marble and chop off whatever I don't need.
-- Francois-Auguste Rodin, when asked how he managed to make his remarkable statues Life is not an easy matter.... You cannot live through it without falling into frustration and cynicism
unless you have before you a great idea which raises you above personal misery, above
weakness Marriage: A ceremony in which rings are put on the finger of the lady and around the hands and feet of the man. Arts and Entertainment
May you be blessed with a wife so healthy and strong, she can pull the plow when your horse drops dead. I am beginning to suspect all elaborate and special systems of education. They seem to me to be
built upon the supposition that every child is a kind of idiot who must be taught to think.
-- Anne S When Michelangelo finished the painting of the Sistine Chapel's ceiling, he spent the rest of his
life trying to remove the paint that had poured into his sleeve.
-- Francois Cavanna Our elections are free - it's in the results where eventually we pay.
-- Bill Stern If I were a girl, I'd despair. The supply of good women far exceeds that of the men who deserve
them.
-- Robert Graves Arts and Entertainment Mathematics, rightly viewed, posses not only truth, but supreme beauty -- a beauty cold and
austere, like that of sculpture.
-- Bertrand Russell Blessed is he who has learned to laugh at himself, for he shall never cease to be entertained.
-- John Powell Marriage means commitment. Of course, so does insanity. Arts and Entertainment
Beware you be not swallowed up in books! An ounce of love is worth a pound of knowledge.
-- John Wesley In a hierarchy, every employee tends to rise to his level of incompetence. Therefore:
? In time, every post tends to be occupied by an employee who is incompetent to carry out its
duties.
? Work We in the industry know that behind every successful screenwriter stands a woman. And behind
her stands his wife.
-- Groucho Marx The price of freedom is eternal vigilance.
-- Thomas Jefferson The wages of sin are death, but by the time taxes are taken out, it's just sort of a tired feeling.
-- Paula Poundstone Arts and Entertainment Coffee is a beverage that puts one to sleep when not drank.
-- Alphonse Allais A good marriage is like a casserole, only those responsible for it really know what goes in it.
-- Anonymous Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-
proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe
is Arts and Entertainment
Hope, like faith, is nothing if it is not courageous; it is nothing if it is not ridiculous.
-- Thornton Wilder What do you take me for, an idiot?
- General Charles de Gaulle (1890-1970), when a journalist asked him if he was happy And gain is gain, however small.
-- Robert Browning Correction: Instead of being arrested, as we stated, for kicking his wife down a flight of stairs and hurling a lighted kerosene lamp after her, the Rev. James P. Wellman died unmarried four years ago "Those who dream by day are cognizant of many things which escape those who dream only by night." (Edger Allen Poe) Arts and Entertainment "True friends, like diamonds, are precious and rare. False friends, like autumn leaves, are found everywhere." (Anonymous) Well, I think that it's a- it's had some difficult times but I think we have- we, I think, have been able
to make some very good progress and it's- I would say that it's- it's- it's delightful that w There is no realizable power that man cannot, in time, fashion the tools to attain, nor any power so secure that the naked ape will not abuse it. So it is written in the genetic cards - only physics a Arts and Entertainment
"Have confidence that if you have done a little thing well, you can do a bigger thing well, too." (David Malcolm Storey) Nothing that was worthy in the past departs; no truth or goodness realized by man ever dies, or
can die.
-- Thomas Carlyle What is the answer? In that case, what is the question?
-- Gertrude Stein, dying words What is politics, after all, but the compulsion to preside over property and make other peoples'
decisions for them?
-- Tom Robbins, Skinny Legs and All "I feel I have to protect myself against things. So I'm pretty careful to lose most of them." (George Orson Welles) Arts and Entertainment "Democracy is a form of government that substitutes election by the incompetent many for appointment by the corrupt few." (George Bernard Shaw) "God's creatures, great and small ... eat them one, eat them all." (John A. Simone Sr.) Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about something you said; after marriage,
he'll fall asleep before you finish saying it.
-- Helen Roland Arts and Entertainment
"Try not to have a good time ... This is supposed to be educational." (Charles Schultz) Love does not consist in gazing at each other, but in looking outward together in the same
direction.
-- Antoine de Saint-Exupéry A liberal is a man too broadminded to take his own side in a quarrel.
-- Robert Frost "In married life three is company and two is none." (Oscar Wilde, The Importance of Being Earnest) To decide, to be at the level of choice, is to take responsibility for your life and to be in control of
your life.
-- Abbie M. Dale Arts and Entertainment The real questions are the ones that obtrude upon your consciousness whether you like it or not,
the ones that make your mind start vibrating like a jackhammer, the ones that you 'come to terms
with Creativity is the sudden cessation of stupidity.
-- Edward H. Land Glory is fleeting, but obscurity is forever.
- Napoleon Bonaparte Arts and Entertainment
Books had instant replay long before televised sports.
-- Bern Williams Beneath the rule of men entirely great, / The pen is mightier than the sword.
-- Edward Robert Bulwer-Lytton, Richelieu, II. ii To love another person is to help them love God.
-- Søren Kierkegaard The voice of the intellect is a soft one, but it does not rest till it has gained a hearing.
-- Sigmund Freud Good breeding consists in concealing how much we think of ourselves and how little we think of
the other person.
-- Mark Twain Arts and Entertainment Saying that Windows95 is equal to Macintosh is like finding a potato that looks like Jesus and
believing you've witnessed the second coming.
-- Guy Kawasaki Vote for the man who promises least. He'll be the least disappointing.
-- Bernard Baruch It is better to be hated for what you are than to be loved for what you are not.
-- Andre Gide Arts and Entertainment
I base my fashion sense on what doesn't itch.
-- Gilda Radner I do not have much patience with a thing of beauty that must be explained to be understood. If it
does need additional interpretation by someone other than the creator, then I question whether it
ha A good novel tells us the truth about its hero; but a bad novel tells us the truth about its author.
-- G. K. Chesterton "When a hundred men stand together, each of them loses his mind and gets another one." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Why yes -- a bulletproof vest.
-- James Rodges, murderer, on his final request before the firing squad Arts and Entertainment "Marriage excuses no one the freak's roll-call." (Joe Orton, What the Butler Saw) "Well begun is half done." (Aristotle) "Not by wrath does one kill, but by laughter." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Arts and Entertainment
