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A Code of Honor: Never approach a friend's girlfriend or wife with mischief as your goal. There are just too many women in the world to justify that sort of dishonorable behavior. Unless she's reall The closer I'm bound in love to you, the closer I am to free. -- Indigo Girls, song lyric "In order to attain the impossible, one must attempt the absurd." (Miguel de Cervantes Saavedra, 1547-1616) Love thy neighbor, but make sure her husband is away first. Love is an ideal thing, marriage a real thing; a confusion of the real with the ideal never goes unpunished. -- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe Guides and Directories The average, healthy, well-adjusted adult gets up at seven-thirty in the morning feeling just plain terrible. -- Jean Kerr Immature love says: "I love you because I need you." Mature love says: "I need you because I love you." -- Erich Fromm blah "A friend is someone who gives you total freedom to be yourself." (James Douglas Morrison, lead singer of The Doors) Guides and Directories I find television very educating. Every time sombody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book. -- Groucho Marx Great ability develops and reveals itself increasingly with every new assignment. Baltasar Gracian I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me. Honest disagreement is often a good sign of progress. -- Gandhi The reason why worry kills more people than work is that more people worry than work. -- ROBERT FROST Guides and Directories There are trivial truths, and there are great truths. The opposite of a trivial truth is plainly false. The opposite of a great truth is also true. -- Neils Bohr If the French were really intelligent, they'd speak English. -- Wilfred Sheed By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher. -- Socrates Guides and Directories "Nothing has been purchased more dearly than the little bit of reason and sense of freedom which now constitutes our pride." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) "The key to wisdom is knowing all the right questions." (John A. Simone Jr.) A good time to keep your mouth shut is when you're in deep water. -- Sidney Goff Do you not know, my son, with what little understanding the world is ruled? -- Pope Julius III There are only two things a child will share willingly communicable diseases and his mother's age. -- Modern Maturity Guides and Directories "Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something." (Plato, 427 BC-348) "I don't care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members." (Groucho Marx) If I were a girl, I'd despair. The supply of good women far exceeds that of the men who deserve them. -- Robert Graves Guides and Directories "When marrying, ask yourself this question: Do you believe that you will be able to converse well with this person into your old age? Everything else in marriage is transitory." (Friedrich Wilhelm Ni Don't marry for money; you can borrow it cheaper. Your goals, minus your doubts, equal your reality. -- Ralph Marston I'm like old wine. They don't bring me out very often, but I'm well preserved. -- Rose Kennedy, (1890-1995) family matriarch, on her 100th birthday, 1991 Often it does seem a pity that Noah and his party did not miss the boat. -- Mark Twain Guides and Directories Love is not blind - it sees more, not less. But because it sees more, it is willing to see less. Rabbi Julius Gordon The first duty of a lecturer: to hand you after an hour's discourse a nugget of pure truth to wrap up between the pages of your notebooks, and keep on the mantlepiece forever. -- Virginia Woolf "Any existence deprived of freedom is a kind of death." (General Michel Aoun) Guides and Directories "If I could drop dead right now, I'd be the happiest man alive." (Samuel Goldwyn) Every major horror of history was committed in the name of an altruistic motive. -- Ayn Rand "A bore is a man who, when you ask him how he is, tells you." (Bert Leston Taylor) He believes that marriage and a career don't mix. So after the wedding he plans to quit his job. -- Anonymous I think there is a world market for maybe five computers. - Thomas Watson, Chairman of IBM, 1943 Guides and Directories Giving every man a vote has no more made men wise and free than Christianity has made them good. -- H.L. Mencken "Do not do unto others as you expect they should do unto you. Their tastes may not be the same." (George Bernard Shaw) All women are born evil. Some just realize their potential later in life than others. -- Chad A. Gamble, Escape, short story Guides and Directories "It serves me right for putting all my eggs in one bastard." (Dorothy Parker, 1893-1967, US writer) Our elections are free - it's in the results where eventually we pay. -- Bill Stern Guide to understanding a net.addict's day: Slow day: didn't have much to do, so spent three hours on usenet. Busy day: managed to work in three hours of usenet. Bad day: barely squeezed in three ho "To educate educators! But the first ones must educate themselves! And for these I write." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Truth is more of a stranger than fiction. -- Mark Twain Guides and Directories I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury. -- Groucho Marx "Do not do unto others as you expect they should do unto you. Their tastes may not be the same." (George Bernard Shaw) How could they tell? -- Dorothy Parker, upon hearing that President Coolidge had died Guides and Directories "I would rather die standing than live on my knees!" (Emiliano Zapata) "I have never met a man so ignorant that I couldn't learn something from him." (Galileo Galilei) One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief that one's work is terribly important. - Bertrand Russell [text_end] [text_start] A little inaccuracy sometimes saves a ton The most happy marriage I can imagine to myself would be the union of a deaf man to a blind woman. -- S. T. Coleridge Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution. -- Mae West Guides and Directories Conscience is the inner voice which warns us that someone may be looking. -- H. L. Mencken "He who can, does. He who cannot, teaches." (George Bernard Shaw) This search for what you want is like tracking something that doesn't want to be tracked. It takes time to get a dance right, to create something memorable. -- Fred Astaire Guides and Directories Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go. -- T.S. Eliot We live at a time when man believes himself fabulously capable of creation, but he does not know what to create. -- Jose Ortega y Gasset "I don't believe people die. They just go uptown. To Bloomingdales. They just take longer to get back." (Andy Warhol) Imitation is the sincerest form of television. -- Fred Allen "Death is nothing, but to live defeated and inglorious is to die daily." (Napoleon Bonaparte) Guides and Directories I love Mickey Mouse more than any woman I have ever known. -- Walt Disney I think 'Hail to the Chief' has a nice ring to it. - John F. Kennedy when asked what is his favorite song There are two major products that come out of Berkeley: LSD and UNIX. We don't believe this to be a coincidence. -- Jeremy S. Anderson Guides and Directories You can not apply mathematics as long as words still becloud reality. -- Hermann Weyl The question is not whether we will die, but how we will live. -- Joan Borysenko The best time to hold your tongue is the time you feel you must say something or bust. -- Josh Billings It's not the size of the dog in the fight, it's the size of the fight in the dog. - Mark Twain There is nothing that can be said by mathematical symbols and relations which cannot also be said by words. The converse, however, is false. Much that can be and is said by words cannot successfully Guides and Directories My religion consists of a humble admiration of the unlimitable superior who reveals Himself in the slight details we are able to perceive with our frail and feeble minds. That deeply emotional convi For one human being to love another: that is perhaps the most difficult of our tasks; the ultimate, the last test and proof, the work for which all other work is but preparation. -- Rainer Maria Ril The difference between a man who faces death for the sake of an idea and an imitator who goes in search of martyrdom is that the former expresses his idea most fully in death while the latter really Guides and Directories My mother's menu consisted of two choices: Take it or leave it. -- Buddy Hackett A poem is never finished, only abandoned. -- Paul Valery A jury consists of twelve persons chosen to decide who has the better lawyer. Robert Frost (1874-1963) May your wife be a witch who takes after her mother, and may you all live together in a one-room house. I've been asked to say a couple of words about my husband, Fang. How about 'short' and 'cheap'? -- Phyllis Diller Guides and Directories It is dangerous to be sincere unless you are also stupid. - George Bernard Shaw "Experience is a good teacher, but she sends in terrific bills." (Minna Antrim) Weaseling out of things is good. It's what separates us from the other animals....except weasels. -- Homer Simpson, character from The Simpsons, U.S. animated television show Guides and Directories Wise men make proverbs, but fools repeat them. - Samuel Palmer He who receives an idea from me receives instruction for himself without lessening mine; as he who lights his taper at mine receives light without darkening me. -- Thomas Jefferson All women are born evil. Some just realize their potential later in life than others. -- Chad A. Gamble, Escape, short story People only see what they are prepared to see. -- Ralph Waldo Emerson "What you do speaks so loudly that I cannot hear what you say." (Ralph Waldo Emerson) Guides and Directories "It is dangerous to be right in matters on which the established authorities are wrong." (Francois Marie Arouet Voltaire, 1694-1778) "Great spirits have always faced voilent protest from mediocre minds." (Albert Einstein) Old soldiers never die, they just fade away. -- General Douglas MacArthur Guides and Directories
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