Ninety percent of the game is half mental.
-- Yogi Berra Too bad all the people who know how to run the country are busy driving cabs and cutting hair.
-- George Burns Why yes -- a bulletproof vest.
-- James Rodges, murderer, on his final request before the firing squad "Be the change that you want to see in the world." (Mohandas Gandhi) "Hold a true friend with both your hands." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Weather "O' What may man within him hide, though angel on the outward side!" (William Shakespeare) Thank God - every morning when you get up - that you have something to do which must be
done, whether you like it or not. Being forced to work, and forced to do your best, will breed in you
a hundre Women: If they're not turning down your proposals for marriage, they're accusing you of
suspicious behavior in the women's lingerie changing room.
-- Cliff Clavin, character on "Cheers", U.S. Televi Weather
If all men were brothers, would you let one marry your sister? Abstract art: a product of the untalented sold by the unprincipled to the utterly bewildered.
-- Al Capp "There are some enterprises in which a careful disorderliness is the true method." (Herman Melville, Moby Dick) Bachelors know more about women than married men; if they didn't, they'd be married too.
-- H. L. Mencken "Growth in wisdom can be measured precisely by decline in bile." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche, Human, All Too Human) Weather "In all affairs it's a healthy thing now and then to hang a question mark on the things you have long taken for granted." (Bertrand Arthur William Russell, 1872-1970) There are times when parenthood seems nothing but feeding the mouth that bites you.
-- Peter De Vries "A fool thinks himself to be wise, but a wise man knows himself to be a fool." (William Shakespeare) Weather
Long engagements give people the opportunity of finding out each other's character before
marriage, which is never advisable.
-- Oscar Wilde "This is slavery, not to speak one's thought." (Euripides) Love does not consist in gazing at each other, but in looking outward together in the same
direction.
-- Antoine de Saint-Exupéry Trust, but verify.
-- Ronald Reagan If you put garbage in a computer nothing comes out but garbage. But this garbage, having
passed through a very expensive machine, is somehow ennobled and none dare criticize it.
-- Anonymous Weather Marriage is a thing which puts a ring on a woman's finger and two under the man's eyes. Nothing can so alienate a voter from the political system as backing a winning candidate.
-- Mark B. Cohen There are those who look at things the way they are, and ask why... I dream of things that never
were, and ask why not?
-- Robert Francis Kennedy Weather
If you cannot be the master of your language, you must be its slave. If you cannot examine your
thoughts, you have no choice but to think them, however silly they may be.
-- Richard Mitchell, from I still live.
-- Daniel Webster, dying words "A woman may very well form a friendship with a man, but for this to endure, it must be assisted by a little physical antipathy." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) We need a president who's fluent in at least one language.
-- Buck Henry "You exist only in what you do." (Federico Fellini) Weather Once all struggle is grasped, miracles are possible.
-- Mao Tse-tung Mother-in-law: A woman who destroys her son-in-law's peace of mind by giving him a piece of
hers.
-- Anonymous Whoever is not a misanthrope at forty can never have loved mankind.
-- Sebastian Roch Nicolas Chamfort Weather
Love looks through a telescope; envy, through a microscope.
-- Josh Billings Minds are like parachutes - they only function when open.
-- Thomas Dewar We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.
-- Aristotle The world has suffered more from the ravages of ill-advised marriages than from virginity.
-- Ambrose Bierce "It wasn't until I started reading and found books they wouldn't let us read in school that I discovered you could be insane and happy and have a good life without being like everybody else." (John W Weather What is politics, after all, but the compulsion to preside over property and make other peoples'
decisions for them?
-- Tom Robbins, Skinny Legs and All Christianity has not been tried and found wanting; it has been found difficult and not tried.
-- G. K. Chesterton When yer in a funk, people in love are a royal pain in the patookus.
-- Portnoy, character in "Outland," comic strip by Berkely Breathed Weather
We have drugs to make women speak, but none to keep them silent.
-- Anatole France "Talent does what it can; genius does what it must." (Edward Robert Bulwer-Lytton) I stopped believing in Santa Claus when I was six. Mother took me to see him in a department
store and he asked for my autograph.
-- Shirley Temple Black You have to walk carefully in the beginning of love; the running across fields into your lover's
arms can only come later when you're sure they won't laugh if you trip.
-- Jonathan Carroll, Outside "Deep down, no one really believes they have a right to live. But this death sentence generally stays tucked away, hidden beneath the difficulty of living. If that difficulty is removed from time to t Weather "Learn from the mistakes of others--you can never live long enough to make them all yourself." (John Luther) "Those who dream by day are cognizant of many things which escape those who dream only by night." (Edger Allen Poe) I think one of the reasons I'm popular again is because I'm wearing a tie. You have to be different.
-- Tony Bennett, 1995 Weather
"Life is a great surprise. I don't see why death should not be an even greater one." (Vladimir Nabokov) I would have made a good Pope.
-- Richard Nixon, U.S. President The Church is an organism that grows best in an alien society.
-- C. Stacey Woods A multiple personality is in a certain sense normal.
-- George H. Mead They have come up with a perfect understanding. He won't try to run her life, and he won't try to
run his, either.
-- Anonymous Weather "I've decided something: Commercial things really do stink. As soon as it becomes commercial for a mass market it really stinks." (Andy Warhol, The Andy Warhol Diaries, 1989) "Deep down, no one really believes they have a right to live. But this death sentence generally stays tucked away, hidden beneath the difficulty of living. If that difficulty is removed from time to t "Expect nothing. Live frugally on surprise." (Alice Walker) Weather
To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance.
-- Oscar Wilde Democracy is a form of government that substitutes election by the incompetent many for
appointment by the corrupt few.
-- George bernard Shaw In the end, everything is a gag.
-- Charlie Chaplin You can't learn too soon that the most useful thing about a principle is that it can always be
sacrificed to expediency.
-- W. Somerset Maugham The trouble with our times is that the future is not what it used to be.
-- Paul Valery Weather If you want a place in the sun, you've got to put up with a few blisters.
-- Abigail Van Buren By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher. -- Socrates He who awaits much can expect little.
-- Gabriel Garcia Marquez Weather
Marriage is the sole cause of divorce. "Club Secretary: I say, Lawrence. You are a clown!
Lawrence: We can't all be lion tamers." (Thomas Edward Lawrence, Lawrence of Arabia, 1962) This novel is not to be tossed lightly aside, but hurled with great force.
-- Dorothy Parker "Not only is there no guarantee of the temporal immortality of the human soul, that is to say of its eternal survival after death; but, in any case, this assumption completely fails to accomplish the Is life so dear, or peace so sweet, as to be purchased at the price of chains or slavery? Forbid it,
Almighty God! I know not what course others may take but as for me; give me liberty or give me
de Weather A woman may very well form a friendship with a man, but for this to endure, it must be assisted
by a little physical antipathy.
-- Friedrich Nietzsche Count your age with friends but not with years.
-- Anonymous Why don't you write books people can read?
-- Nora Joyce, to her husband James Weather
Man is the only animal that laughs and has a state legislature.
-- Samuel Butler Experience teaches only the teachable.
-- Aldous Huxley A conclusion is the place where you got tired thinking.
-- Martin H. Fischer We would often be sorry if our wishes were gratified.
-- Aesop We have been friends together in sunshine and in shade.
-- Caroline Norton Weather Your every voter, as surely as your chief magistrate, exercises a public trust.
-- Grover Cleveland Gravitation can not be held responsible for people falling in love.
-- Albert Einstein ... it is certain that the real function of art is to increase our self-consciousness; to make us more
aware of what we are, and therefore of what the universe in which we live really is. And since
Weather
Parents often talk about the younger generations as if they didn't have anything to do with it. blah "Show me a thoroughly satisfied man and I will show you a failure." (Thomas Alva Edison) If I tell a lie it's only because I think I'm telling the truth.
-- Phil Gaglardi, Minister of Highways, British Columbia, Canada The first rule of intelligent tinkering is to save all the parts.
-- Paul Ehrlich >From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down I was convulsed with laughter. Some
day I intend reading it.
-- Groucho Marx Weather I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years.
-- Sam Kinison Realism is a corruption of reality.
-- Wallace Stevens Executive ability is deciding quickly and getting someone else to do the work.
-- John G. Pollard Weather
