My opinions are my wife's, and she says I'm lucky to have them. I don't know anything about music. In my line you don't have to.
-- Elvis Presley Public office is the last refuge of a scoundrel.
-- Boies Penrose, 1931 Love is temporary insanity curable by marriage.
-- Ambrose Bierce To love another person is to see the face of God.
-- Lyric from Les Miserables Education Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than going to a garage makes you an
automobile.
-- Billy Sunday First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win.
- Mahatma Gandhi When marriage is outlawed, only outlaws will have inlaws. Education
Creativity is piercing the mundane to find the marvelous.
-- Bill Moyers You have no more right to consume happiness without producing it than to consume wealth
without producing it.
-- George Bernard Shaw The man who complains about the way the ball bounces is likely the one who dropped it.
-- Lou Holtz Ridicule is generally made use of to laugh men out of virtue and good sense, by attacking
everything praiseworthy in human life.
-- Joseph Addison When he first ran for office, he appealed to the voters: "I never stole anything in my life. All I ask
is a chance."
-- Anon. Education Friends applaud, the Comedy is over.
-- Ludwig von Beethoven, dying words Marriage is a lottery in which men stake their liberty and women their happiness.
-- Madame de Rieux One word frees us of all the weight and pain of life: that word is love.
-- Sophocles Education
A narcissist is someone better-looking than you are.
-- Gore Vidal "Talking much about oneself can also be a means to conceal oneself." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche, Beyond Good and Evil) A husband is what is left of the lover after the nerve has been extracted.
- Helen Rowland We must believe in free will, we have no choice.
-- Isaac B. Singer My good intentions are completely lethal.
-- Margaret Atwood Education Food, one assumes, provides nourishment; but Americans eat it fully aware that small amounts of
poison have been added to improve its appearance and delay its putrefaction.
-- John Cage I dislike arguments of any kind. They are always vulgar, and often convincing.
-- Oscar Wilde The grand aim of all science is to cover the greatest number of empirical facts by logical
deduction from the smallest number of hypotheses or axioms.
-- Albert Einstein Education
Life is like a movie--since there aren't any commercial breaks, you have to get up and go to the
bathroom in the middle of it.
-- Nick Mirov Fighting is essentially a masculine idea; a woman's weapon is her tongue.
-- Hermione Gingold Here's to you and here's to me,
and I hope we never disagree.
But, if that should ever be,
to HELL with you, here's to ME!
-- Anonymous Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, and half shut afterwards.
-- Benjamin Franklin Well, I think that it's a- it's had some difficult times but I think we have- we, I think, have been able
to make some very good progress and it's- I would say that it's- it's- it's delightful that w Education Life is like a movie--since there aren't any commercial breaks, you have to get up and go to the
bathroom in the middle of it.
-- Nick Mirov It was just him and me. He fought with honor. If it weren't for his honor, he and the others would
have beaten me together. They might have killed me, then. His sense of honor saved my life. I
didn' "As is our confidence, so is our capacity." (William Hazlitt) Education
Husbands are like fires. They go out if unattended.
-- Zsa Zsa Gabor All marriages are happy. It's living together afterwards that is difficult.
-- Anonymous The majority of husbands remind me of an orangutan trying to play the violin.
-- Honore de Balzac The only thing you take with you when you're gone is what you leave behind.
-- John Allston Don't ever take a fence down until you know why it was put up.
-- Robert Frost Education blah "The best students always are flunking. Every good teacher knows that." (Robert M. Pirsig, Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance) Correction: Instead of being arrested, as we stated, for kicking his wife down a flight of stairs and hurling a lighted kerosene lamp after her, the Rev. James P. Wellman died unmarried four years ago I am free of all prejudice. I hate everyone equally.
-- W. C. Fields Education
I tried a mail order bride, once, but she was damaged in the mail, and I had to return the unused part for my full refund. "Eternal vigilance is the price of freedom." (Raymonde Uy) There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics.
-- Benjamin Disraeli I think there is a world market for maybe five computers.
- Thomas Watson, Chairman of IBM, 1943 The promises of maniacs, like those of women, are not safely relied upon.
-- Joseph Heller, God Knows Education "Experience is a good teacher, but she sends in terrific bills." (Minna Antrim) Honor lies in honest toil.
-- Grover Cleveland The true spirit of conversation consists in building on another man's observation, not overturning
it.
-- Edward Bulwer-Lytton Education
Every flower must grow through dirt.
-- Anonymous "Some look at things that are, and ask why. I dream of things that never were and ask why not?" (George Bernard Shaw) "If it doesn't matter who wins or loses, then why do they keep score?" (Vince Lombardi) The empires of the future are the empires of the mind.
-- Winston Churchill "In some ways, I never outgrew my adolescence. I wake up in the morning and think, 'Oh my God, I'm late for a math test!' But then I say, 'Wait a minute. I'm 40.'" (Daniel Clowes) Education There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as
though everything is a miracle.
- Albert Einstein You can take all the sincerity in Hollywood, place it in the navel of a firefly and still have room
enough for three caraway seeds and a producer's heart.
-- Fred Allen Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go.
-- T.S. Eliot Education
The Church is an organism that grows best in an alien society.
-- C. Stacey Woods "Teacher played hooky. Sent message: 'Receiving instruction. Enjoying myself thoroughly. See you next week.'" (John Cage, M, Writings 1967 - 1972) I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work.
-- Thomas Edison "Your children are not your children. They are sons and daughters of life's longing for itself. They come through you but not from you. And though they are with you, they belong not to you. You may gi "It is dangerous to be right in matters on which the established authorities are wrong." (Francois Marie Arouet Voltaire, 1694-1778) Education Whenever you eliminate the inedible, whatever remains, however unpalatable, must be food.
-- Anonymous A dollar saved is a quarter earned.
-- John Ciardi Happiness is nothing more than health and a poor memory.
-- Albert Schweitzer Education
"I offer images; I conjure memories of freedom that can still be reached ... But, we can only open the doors. We can't drag people through. I can't free them unless they want to be free--more than any Love is the flower of life, and blossoms unexpectedly and without law, and must be plucked
where it is found, and enjoyed for the brief hour of its duration.
-- D. H. Lawrence A husband is a guy who tells you when you've got on too much lipstick and helps you with your
girdle when your hips stick.
-- Ogden Nash Life is like music; it must be composed by ear, feeling, and instinct, not by rule.
-- Samuel Butler "Dear World, I am leaving because I am bored. I feel I have lived long enough. I am leaving you with your worries in this sweet cesspool. Good luck." (George Sanders, suicide note) Education Thank God - every morning when you get up - that you have something to do which must be
done, whether you like it or not. Being forced to work, and forced to do your best, will breed in you
a hundre He who receives an idea from me receives instruction for himself without lessening mine; as he
who lights his taper at mine receives light without darkening me.
-- Thomas Jefferson Curiosity killed the cat, but for a while I was a suspect.
-- Steven Wright Education
"If A equals success, then the formula is: A = X + Y + Z, X is work. Y is play. Z is keep your mouth shut." (Albert Einstein) You cannot create experience. You must undergo it.
-- Albert Camus The Democrats are the party that says government will make you smarter, taller, richer, and
remove the crabgrass on your lawn. The Republicans are the party that says government doesn't
work and the We didn't lose the game; we just ran out of time.
- Vince Lombardi "I know that God won't give me more trouble than I can handle ... but sometimes I wish he wouldn't trust me so much." (Mother Teresa) Education A theory is something nobody believes, except the person who made it. An experiment is
something everybody believes, except the person who made it.
-- Albert Einstein, attributed Love is only the game that is not called on account of darkness.
-- M. Hirschfield For the majority of People, smoking has a beneficial effect.
-- Dr. Ian G. Macdonald, Los Angeles surgeon, quoted in Newsweek , Nov.18th 1963. Education
Gravitation cannot be held responsible for people falling in love.
-- Albert Einstein I went into a McDonald's yesterday and said, "I'd like some fries." The girl at the counter said,
"Would you like some fries with that?"
-- Jay Leno ...the fog is rising.
-- Emily Dickinson, dying words The unfortunate thing about this world is that the good habits are much easier to give up than the
bad ones.
-- W. Somerset Maugham All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusion is called a philosopher.
- Ambrose Bierce Education Do not fear to be eccentric in opinion, for every opinion now accepted was once eccentric.
-- Bertrand Russell Curiosity will conquer fear even more than bravery will.
-- James Stephens Laywers, I suppose, were children once.
-- Charles Lamb Education
