My darling wife was always glum. I drowned her in a cask of rum, And so made sure that she would stay, In better spirits night and day. They were doing a full back shot of me in a swimsuit and I thought, Oh my God, I have to be so
brave. See, every woman hates herself from behind.
-- Cindy Crawford, supermodel Marriage is not a word. It is a sentence--a life sentence. Most of our obstacles would melt away if, instead of cowering before them, we should make up
our minds to walk boldly through them.
-- Orison Swett Marden Always bear in mind that your own resolution to success is more important than any other one
thing.
-- Abraham Lincoln Chats and Forums I do not see the EEC as a great love affair. It is more like nine desperate middle-ages couples with failing marriages meeting at a Brussels hotel for a group grope. -- Tynan Whenever a husband and wife begin to discuss their marriage, they are giving evidence at an
inquest.
-- H. L. Mencken Show me a sane man and I will cure him for you.
- Carl Gustav Jung Chats and Forums
Flowers are words which even a baby can understand.
-- Arthur C. Coxe He who dies a thousand deaths meets the final hour with the calmness of one who approaches a
well remembered door.
-- Heywood Brown I'm living so far beyond my income that we may almost be said to be living apart.
- e e cummings Curiosity will conquer fear even more than bravery will.
-- James Stephens A hippo does not have a sting in its tail, but a wise man would still rather be sat on by a bee.
-- Polish proverb Chats and Forums Marriage is like a violin. After the music is over, you still have the strings.
-- Anonymous Good communication is as stimulating as black coffee, and just as hard to sleep after.
-- Anne Morrow Lindbergh "Even a stopped clock is right twice a day." (Marie von Ebner-Eschenbach) Chats and Forums
A man's reach should exeed his grasp, or else what's a heaven for?
-- Robert Browning We are not retreating - we are advancing in another Direction.
- General Douglas MacArthur "Even a stopped clock is right twice a day." (Marie von Ebner-Eschenbach) You can close your eyes to reality, but not to memories.
-- Stanislaw J. Lem The real test of friendship is: Can you literally do nothing with the other person? Can you enjoy
together those moments of life that are utterly simple? They are the moments people looks back
on at Chats and Forums I have a daughter who goes to SMU. She could've gone to UCLA here in California, but it's one
more letter she'd have to remember.
-- Shecky Greene Honor's a thing too subtle for wisdom; if honor lie in eating, he's right honorable.
-- Beaumont, Francis "Liberty means responsibility. That is why most men dread it." (George Bernard Shaw) Chats and Forums
Guide to understanding a net.addict's day:
Slow day: didn't have much to do, so spent three hours on usenet.
Busy day: managed to work in three hours of usenet.
Bad day: barely squeezed in three ho "I would rather die standing than live on my knees!" (Emiliano Zapata) The average, healthy, well-adjusted adult gets up at seven-thirty in the morning feeling just plain
terrible.
-- Jean Kerr A man can't get rich if he takes proper care of his family.
-- Navaho saying "Give me liberty or give me death." (Patrick Henry) Chats and Forums "When thou art at Rome, do as they do at Rome." (Miguel de Cervantes Saavedra, 1547-1616) The unfortunate thing about this world is that the good habits are much easier to give up than the
bad ones.
-- W. Somerset Maugham "In order to keep anything cultural, logical, or ideological, you have to reinvent the reality of it." (Ani Difranco) Chats and Forums
"If you meet a woman that smokes cigars ... marry her." (Arthur Lotti) I believe in getting into hot water; it keeps you clean.
-- G. K. Chesterton Many a man owes his success to his first wife and his second wife to his success.
-- Jim Backus The grass may be greener on the other side of the fence, but you still have to mow it.
-- Anonymous Trouble is a part of your life, and if you don't share it, you don't give the person that loves you
enough chance to love you enough.
-- Dinah Shore Chats and Forums Propel, propel, propel your craft softly down liquid solution. Ecstatically, ecstatically, ecstatically,
ecstatically, Existence is simply illusion.
-- Fred Rogers, parody of "Row, row, row your boa Ninety percent of the game is half mental.
-- Yogi Berra Show me a sane man and I will cure him for you.
- Carl Gustav Jung Chats and Forums
"The trouble with the world is that the stupid are cocksure and the intelligent are full of doubt." (Bertrand Arthur William Russell, 1872-1970) In any organization there will always be one person who knows what is going on. This person
must be fired.
-- Conway's Law Don't marry for money; you can borrow it cheaper. In the halls of justice, the only justice is in the halls.
-- Lenny Bruce Those parts of the system that you can hit with a hammer (not advised) are called hardware;
those program instructions that you can only curse at are called software.
-- Unknown author, Levitating T Chats and Forums This is a test. It is only a test. Had it been an actual job, you would have received raises,
promotions, and other signs of appreciation.
-- Anonymous Did you hear about the scientist whose wife had twins? He baptized one and kept the other as a control. When one find's oneself in a hole of one's own making, it is a good time to examine the quality of
the workmanship.
-- John Renmerde Chats and Forums
If you can't convince them, confuse them.
-- Harry S. Truman This is a test. It is only a test. Had it been an actual job, you would have received raises,
promotions, and other signs of appreciation.
-- Anonymous The greatest homage to truth is to use it.
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson It's never too late to have a happy childhood.
-- Tom Robbins, Still Life With Woodpecker "The purpose of Compulsory Education is to deprive the common people of their commonsense." (Gilbert Keith Chesterton) Chats and Forums "... and then the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom." (Anais Nin) It destroys one's nerves to be amiable everyday to the same human being.
-- Benjamin Disraeli To travel hopefully is a better thing than to arrive, and the true success is to labour.
-- Robert L. Stevenson Chats and Forums
Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored.
-- Aldous Huxley "Our destiny exercises its influence over us even when, as yet, we have not learned its nature: it is our future that lays down the law of our today." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) "I hear, I know. I see, I remember. I do, I understand." (Confucius, 551 BC-479) "Crime like death is not confined to the old and withered alone. The youngest and fairest are too often its chosen victims." (Charles Dickens, 1812-70, Oliver Twist) "Every act of creation is first an act of destruction." (Pablo Picasso) Chats and Forums "I do not agree with what you have to say, but I'll defend to the death your right to say it." (Francois Marie Arouet Voltaire, 1694-1778) Hell is other people.
- Jean-Paul Sartre Journalism consists largely in saying "Lord Jones died" to people who never knew Lord Jones
was alive.
-- G. K. Chesterton Chats and Forums
You may be disappointed if you fail, but you are doomed if you don't try.
-- Beverly Sills Until the day of his death, no man can be sure of his courage.
-- Jean Anouilh How could they tell?
-- Dorothy Parker, upon hearing that President Coolidge had died "Genius without education is like silver in the mine." (Benjamin Franklin) The greatest homage to truth is to use it.
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson Chats and Forums "Twelve magicians and two carnies have been shot dead doing the bullet catch. That's cool enough, but every night when we close our show with that trick and the loaded gun gets pointed in my face, it Mathematics transfigures the fortuitous concourse of atoms into the tracery of the finger of God.
-- Herbert Westren Turnbull Such is life.
-- Ned Kelly, Last words, before being hung at Old Melbourne Gaol Chats and Forums
blah "Ability wins us the esteem of the true men; luck that of the people." (François VI Duke (duc) de La Rochefoucauld, 1616-80) "If you believe everything you read, you better not read." (Japanese Proverb) I do not consider it an insult, but rather a compliment to be called an agnostic. I do not pretend to
know where many ignorant men are sure -- that is all that agnosticism means.
- Clarence Darrow, "Furious activity is no substitute for understanding." (H. H. Williams) "All our best men are laughed at in this nightmare land." (Jack Keroac) Chats and Forums Three o'clock is always too late or too early for anything you want to do.
- Jean-Paul Sartre I don't know anything about music. In my line you don't have to.
-- Elvis Presley A doctor can bury his mistakes but an architect can only advise his clients to plant vines.
- Frank Lloyd Wright Chats and Forums
'm living so far beyond my income that we may almost be said to be living apart.
-- ee cummings I'm an excellent housekeeper. Every time I get a divorce, I keep the house.
-- Zsa Zsa Gabor I believe God is managing affairs and that He doesn't need any advice from me. With God in
charge, I believe everything will work out for the best in the end. So what is there to worry about.
-- Hen "Careful?! Was my mother careful when she stabbed me in the heart with a coat hanger while I was still in the womb?" (Trey Parker) Mathematicians are like Frenchmen: whatever you say to them they translate into their own
language and forthwith it is something entirely different.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe Chats and Forums NEIGHBOR, n. One whom we are commanded to love as ourselves, and who does all he knows
how to make us disobedient.
-- Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, 1911 Silence is argument carried out by other means.
-- Ernesto "Che" Guevara The difference between 'involvement' and 'commitment' is like an eggs-and-ham breakfast: the
chicken was 'involved' - the pig was 'committed'.
- unknown Chats and Forums
