If absolute power corrupts absolutely, does absolute powerlessness make you pure?
-- Harry Shearer My wife says if I go fishing one more time she's going to leave me. Gosh, I'm going to miss her. The wages of sin are death, but by the time taxes are taken out, it's just sort of a tired feeling.
-- Paula Poundstone Every child is born a genius.
-- R. Buckminster Fuller "What a curious phenomenon it is that you can get men to die for the liberty of the world who will not make the little sacrifice that is needed to free themselves from their own individual bondage." Magazines and E-zines Nobody is more dangerous than he who imagines himself pure in heart; for his purity, by
definition, is unassailable.
-- James Baldwin, Nobody Knows My Name, 1961 Curiosity will conquer fear even more than bravery will.
-- James Stephens A hippo does not have a sting in its tail, but a wise man would still rather be sat on by a bee.
-- Polish proverb Magazines and E-zines
In view of all the deadly computer viruses that have been spreading lately, Weekend Update
would like to remind you: when you link up to another computer, you're linking up to every
computer that th I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial.
- Irvin S. Cobb Now join your hands, and with your hands your hearts.
-- William Shakespeare, King Henry the Sixth "Death is always and under all circumstances a tragedy, for if it is not, then it means that life itself has become one." (Theodore Roosevelt) The nice thing about egotists is that they don't talk about other people.
- Lucille S. Harper Magazines and E-zines We need the iron qualities that go with true manhood. We need the positive virtues of resolution,
of courage, of indomitable will, of power to do without shrinking the rough work that must always
be It's important to be open-minded, but not SO open-minded that your brains fall out.
-- Rick Radebaugh If it weren't for electricity we'd all be watching television by candlelight.
-- George Gobel Magazines and E-zines
"One can do without people but one has need of a friend." (Chinese Proverb) Democracy encourages the majority to decide things about which the majority is blissfully
ignorant.
--John Simon "We have been the cowards lobbing cruise missiles from 2,000 miles away. That's cowardly. Staying in the airplane when it hits the building, say what you want about it, it's not cowardly." (Bill Mahe The greatest mistake you can make in life is to be continually fearing that you will make one.
-- Ellen Hubbard The possibility that we may fail in the struggle ought not to deter us from the support of a cause
we believe to be just.
-- Abraham Lincoln Magazines and E-zines "See - one side of my face is gentle and kind, incapable of anything but love of my fellow man. The other side, the other profile, is cruel and predatory and evil, incapable of anything but lusts and "Conform and be dull." (J. Frank Doble) That government is best which governs least.
-- Henry David Thoreau, Civil Disobedience, 1849 Magazines and E-zines
When you gaze long into the abyss, the abyss also gazes into you.
- Friedrich Nietzsche "In married life three is company and two is none." (Oscar Wilde, The Importance of Being Earnest) More than kisses, letters mingle souls.
-- John Donne Learning is a treasure that will follow its owner everywhere.
-- Chinese Proverb The real questions are the ones that obtrude upon your consciousness whether you like it or not,
the ones that make your mind start vibrating like a jackhammer, the ones that you 'come to terms
with Magazines and E-zines Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed.
- George Burns I belong to Bridegrooms Anonymous. Whenever I feel like getting married, they send over a lady
in a housecoat and hair curlers to burn my toast for me.
-- Dick Martin "Think off-center." (George Carlin) Magazines and E-zines
Marriage has many pains, but celibacy has no pleasures.
-- Samuel Johnson "A girl can wait for the right man to come along, but in the meantime that still doesn't mean she can't have a wonderful time with all the wrong ones." (Cher) Keep your face to the sunshine and you cannot see the shadow.
-- Helen Keller Marriage is like a cage; one sees the birds outside desperate to get in, and those inside
desperate to get out.
-- Michel de Montaigne University politics are vicious precisely because the stakes are so small.
-- Henry Kissinger Magazines and E-zines Love is the flower of life, and blossoms unexpectedly and without law, and must be plucked
where it is found, and enjoyed for the brief hour of its duration.
-- D. H. Lawrence Parents often talk about the younger generations as if they didn't have anything to do with it. We in the industry know that behind every successful screenwriter stands a woman. And behind
her stands his wife.
-- Groucho Marx Magazines and E-zines
>From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down I was convulsed with laughter. Some
day I intend reading it.
-- Groucho Marx What's new? Most of my wife. The power of accurate observation is commonly called cynicism by those who have not got it.
-- George Bernard Shaw I base my fashion sense on what doesn't itch.
-- Gilda Radner People only see what they are prepared to see.
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson Magazines and E-zines "Every now and then say, 'What the fu(c)k.' 'What the fu(c)k' gives you freedom. Freedom brings opportunity. Opportunity makes your future." (Curtis Armstrong, Risky Business, 1983) Some people go to priests; others to poetry; I to my friends.
-- Virginia Woolf, Bernard, in The Waves, 1931; repr. 1943, p. 189 I just want what every married woman wants, someone besides her husband to sleep with.
-- Peg Bundy, character on "Married with Children," U.S. television show Magazines and E-zines
The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.
-- Eleanor Roosevelt Repentance is not so much remorse for what we have done as the fear of the consequences.
-- François de La Rouchefoucauld, Maxims, 1665 Defeat is not the worst of failures. Not to have tried is the true failure.
-- George E. Woodberry Faith is believing what you know ain't so.
-- Mark Twain Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away.
-- Philip K. Dick Magazines and E-zines An expert is a person who has made all the mistakes that can be made in a very narrow field.
-- Niels Bohr "Conscience and cowardice are really the same things. Conscience is the trade-name of the firm. That is all." (Oscar Wilde) It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks. She's not marrying the best man.
-- Anonymous Magazines and E-zines
I couldn't remember when I had been so disappointed. Except perhaps the time I found out that
M&Ms really do melt in your hand...
-- Peter Oakley An economist is a man who states the obvious in terms of the incomprehensible.
-- Alfred A. Knopf "Self confidence is the first requisite to great undertakings." (Samuel Johnson) Heav'n hath no rage like love to hatred turn'd, Nor Hell a fury, like a woman scorn'd.
-- William Congreve "One will rarely err if extreme actions be ascribed to vanity, ordinary actions to habit, and mean actions to fear." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Magazines and E-zines I'm an excellent housekeeper. Every time I get a divorce, I keep the house.
-- Zsa Zsa Gabor Moral indignation is jealousy with a halo.
- H. G. Wells Each religion, by the help of more or less myth which it takes more or less seriously, proposes
some method of fortifying the human soul and enabline it to make its peace with its destiny.
-- George Magazines and E-zines
Many persons have a wrong idea of what constitutes true happiness. It is not attained through
self-gratification but through fidelity to a worthy purpose.
-- Helen Keller If pleasures are greatest in anticipation, just remember that this is also true of trouble.
-- Elbert Hubbard Of course there's a lot of knowledge in universities: the freshmen bring a little in; the seniors don't
take much away, so knowledge sort of accumulates...
-- Anonymous "When even one American--who has done nothing wrong--is forced by fear to shut his mind and close his mouth--then all Americans are in peril." (Harry S. Truman) The instinct of nearly all societies is to lock up anybody who is truly free. First, society begins by
trying to beat you up. If this fails, they try to poison you. If this fails too, the finish by l Magazines and E-zines Some men are born with cold feet; some acquire cold feet; and some have cold feet thrust upon
them.
-- Anonymous Work expands to fill the time available.
-- PARKINSON'S LAW I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain
and bought jewelry.
-- Rita Rudner Magazines and E-zines
The health of the people is really the foundation upon which all their happiness and all their
powers as a State depend.
-- Benjamin Disraeli "I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury." (Groucho Marx) The majority of husbands remind me of an orangutan trying to play the violin.
-- Honore de Balzac There is no reason for any individual to have a computer in his home.
-- Kenneth H. Olson, President of DEC, Convention of the World Future Society, 1977 The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it has never tried to
contact us.
-- Bill Watterson, in his comic strip Calvin and Hobbes Magazines and E-zines We must believe in free will, we have no choice.
-- Isaac B. Singer "Every decent man is ashamed of the government he lives under." (Henry Louis Mencken) Golf is a good walk spoiled.
-- Mark Twain Magazines and E-zines
The great thing in this world is not so much where we stand as in what direction we are going.
-- Oliver Wendell Holmes If you don't double-click me, I can't do anything.
-- John Aniston, on how computers have taken over his life "For how can one know color in perpetual green, and what good is warmth without cold to give it sweetness?" (John Steinbeck, Travels With Charley) 'Tis better to have loved and lost
Than never to have loved at all.
-- Alfred, Lord Tennyson, In Memoriam, 1850, line 27, stanza 4 Die? I should say not, dear fellow. No Barrymore would allow such a conventional thing to
happen to him.
-- John Barrymore - last words Magazines and E-zines "Give me liberty or give me death." (Patrick Henry) The higher up you go, the more mistakes you are allowed. Right at the top, if you make enough of
them, it's considered to be your style.
-- Fred Astaire A team effort is a lot of people doing what I say.
-- Michael Winner Magazines and E-zines
